The grumpy, sulky, complaining thread. For when you just need a good old moan about the unfairness of it all.

Can I join in please? We have been trying for 2 and a half years, have been told I have high FSH and low AMH which is apparently not a good thing (I am 36) and basically been told by the NHS to go away. Am now going for a second opinion but nothing seems to go right....went for day 21 blood test only to be told 2 weeks later the hospital didn't do the test correctly so now waiting for day 21 to come round again! I swear I can literally hear my biological clock ticking as day after day Facebook greets me with the "happy" news of yet another pregnancy, usually via a scan picture and almost went into meltdown yesterday because somebody had put a baby yoga leaflet through the door! Should perhaps change my username to madbitterandtwistedqueen! Thanks for letting me vent...

Was in cafe having cake with DH and had to listen to other table (with newborn) describing her entire birth/labour . Grr. Understand this will always happen but it's almost like its on purpose! Of course it isn't though.

So sorry to hear what everyone is going through

I had someone on facebook who wouldn't stop talking about her pregnancy (updates were either gushing about it or complaining), I had to take her updates off my feed as I couldn't stand it.

One of my friends who can be very self-involved and quite mean at times (she's going through a difficult divorce and has 1 DC so I do try to cut her some slack) said to me "no-one should ever get married or have children". Knowing full well what I had been through, this was hard to hear.

Yep in the UK. Consultant did say that if nothing had happened between now and the op ie April to October he would refer us for IVF when we meet in October so hopefully we'll have some movement in next few weeks! I'm a bit calmer today but still wobbly, my period just showed up with a bit of faint spotting. At least it's a 30 day cycle this month rather than another really long one.

raspberry are you in the UK? I am unexplained too, but 'only' 15 months in I have been told to wait until 3 years for IVF. Are they saying you're not eligible for anything... Keep pushing.

I am always an impatient person, and I think I am probably quite controlling as well. Having something I want so much totally out of my control is driving me insane. My DH is a bit bewildered - he is desperate for a baby but i think more accepting of things, but hates to see me like this more that the rest, I think.

camel i have been fairly open with good friends about it as well. As I am 30 many of my friends have not started trying yet so I do feel quite isolated as those that have have just popped them out already. but I do want infertility to be more in the open, clearly there are lots of us but noone talks about it so you feel worse, I think. and yes, i do look at people on facebok i don't even see any more. i can't stop myself stalking people who are pregnant on facebook as well until they have their babies then i feel worse. I think i'm crazy.

winkle my sis got pg second month of trying, and is prob going to start trying for a second this autumn. i know it'll happen soon for her, and wouldn't want her to go through this, but at the same time am dreading her announcement. I think she'll be nervous to tell me to. Having said that, I adore my niece.

scarlett hang in there, lovely! you won't belong here for long as you'll have your bfp in a few weeks.

One thing that's really irritating is that people with children think that our lives are just so much fun all the time. If I hear one more person go on about "ooh look how much life has changed in the last year, I used to be awake at 3am because I was out clubbing now look at me" I will scream. It's part of the reason I've told quite a few people we're struggling, so not so many thoughtless comments now. I should really keep away from Facebook, does anyone else torture themselves by seeing who from school has kids in their photos?

The other thing that is more sad than ranty is that I can't imagine myself enjoying a pregnancy at all now. I can't imagine flippantly complaining about sickness, tiredness or heartburn, as I will always have loss and failure in the back of my mind.

Raspberry :(

I feel for you. We've been trying a year and I'm just so desperate to be a mum. It sucks.

I think I belong here too! We've been trying for three years, just over actually now and nothing. We have another consultant appointment on 16th October where I suspect we will be deemed 'unexplained' and sent on our way. There is no reason for us not to get pg it just doesn't seem to happen. We've got friends who get pg and have perfectly healthy babies at the drop of a hat but it just never happens for us. Iweve had all the tests, I've had a clear out (5 months ago since lap & dye) so all should be well. I just don't know how much I can cope with any more, I feel so so sad and frustrated and angry that we might never have a baby when others manage it so easily. I can't even write stuff like this without crying anymore. Every month just devastates me and AF is on its way now so it's another month down the drain. I just want it to happen so much, so so much.

You know what pisses me off? That people like Snooki from Jersey Shore can reproduce easy enough and yet here we are, a bunch of smart nice women who are having problems. Doesn't seem fair.

Here is one of the threads on soy community.babycentre.co.uk/post/a12154345/bfps_with_soy_isoflavones.?cpg=1&csi=2045999741&pd=-1

I thought I was the only person in the world who was 'jealous' of others mc's. I know its totally irrational as an mc must be utterly awful, but at least I would know that if I got pg once it could happen again. I think that feeling isn't helped by the fact that the few people who I know have had mc in real life have then all gone on to have healthy babies. My heart goes out to you Ratata, you sound like you've had an awful time.

It seems like every second news story at the moment is about an abandoned baby or neglected child. I want to scream 'give it to me! I'll love it! Even if you don't want your baby, I bloody well do!'

Have any of you tried Soy Isoflavones? It is called nature's clomid. I heard about it on another board where most of the girls got their BFP's first month of taking it. I was ttc for 9 months and nothing was happening. You take it like clomid so I took it days 3-7 and ovulated early on day 11. I could really feel the ovulation and the lines on my ovulation sticks were very dark. It worked first go for me. You can buy the supplements in health stores (make sure they are pure) and you up the dose on each day. I took 75, 125, 175, 200, 225.

Just to add, I did do a test when I had the chemical pregnancy and it was positive for a day. Then negative after.

Hi all. Hope it's ok I come in for a moan, I know I've not been ttc as long as some of you. It's been 10 months and had 1 missed miscarriage and 1 chemical pregnancy. It's been hard. I'm better the months that I don't get pregnant. The feeling of loss sends me over the edge.

The first time we were so happy, went to get an early scan at 9 weeks as we were so excited. Then seeing the nothingness on the screen of just a 5 week sac, we were devastated. Went through a natural miscarriage just over a week later. It was really painful.

Then a few months later was the chemical pregnancy. My body is annoying because I know by 8dpo if I'm pregnant it seems. So if I'm having a chemical pregnancy I know even without doing a test. The chemical pregnancy affected me more emotionally than the mmc. I was seriously unstable and almost jacked in my job. I was sitting at my desk doing tasks and thinking how unimportant it all was compared to the lives that I had inside me and lost.

I know there are folk who have never been pregnant, I don't know what is worse. I think both are awful, not being pregnant and experiencing pregnancy loss. Even if I could just have one baby I would be ecstatic. I just want to feel a baby inside me, moving around and that whole magical feeling.

Sorry, I feel bad for complaining but it's just hard.

My sis is due next month - got preg first month - and I've been trying all the time :(

Try being on IVF down reg drugs. I've never felt so grumpy/mardy/moany/sick/tired/negative/emotional all at once!

I should point out I seem to be one of the unlucky ones, plenty people seem to sail through it...

Oh, I've been looking for a place to vent like this. I'm so tearful and hopeless today. I'm trying to be strong but it's so hard month after month, year after year. Everyone seems to have young children or be pregnant apart from me. Not helping that my p is not being very supportive at the moment since he's very self absorbed about his own problems and I don't want to keep leaning on friends.

So sorry to hear that camel :(

ah camel how heartbreaking for you; I'm so sorry

I'm in year 3 and had my first ever bfp last month. I had one week of nervous excitement and then the bleeding started the evening after I'd seen the gp and had just started talking about mat leave and nursery with dh. Was devastated but it was much easier to deal with than months of nothing. You know you've been ttcing a long time when a mc is progress! Best wishes x

pip i feel exactly the same. i'm jealous of people who have chemical pregnancies. is that insane?

I never test now, haven't in months, as i can't stand to see that arctic white nothing.

cream that is so annoying - get back on the cream teas, lady.