The BESH Fillies Are Under Starters Orders

Was just coming to post a tentative menkul about my droid - one red splodge two nights ago, and nothing since. And then I thought I would have a wee before logging on. And now of course there is blood again. Idiot me.

My lap month was a write off too, lemmy. I think it's the law that everyone suffers equally.

Hello fillies!

Sorry I've been so absent - was away with work and since being back busy busy with social stuff that I haven't had the chance to keep up properly. BUT I synced with you lot too, driodal invasion yesterday morning .

So sorry about the all over the place feelings euro but well done for talking to MrE and feeling like you can say no and get some control back. I totally understand the hesitancy with IVF for unexplained. Petting and hopes for a good weekend with Fury.

So sorry faif about feeling low. That is not good. This doctor is prescribing a lovely day in the park with a small person. And then some resolution on the pain-issue. It is so wrong you've been suffering for this amount of time.

I was away already when you got your news, so a much belated nekkid dance for the heart beat bugsy. Hurrah. Twirling my tassles like mad!

How is the head feeling norf?

Big waves to the others. Things are good at the sour household, very happy with work stuff for a chance :) so that is good. And this month was a write off with SB being away anyway so not too bothered about the droid. But due to the planning (in)abilities of the hospital the lap-month will be a write off too (and we might have to make sure of that by using our nearly out of date condoms ).

Night night, bugsy. Night night smokey.

Friends. Arty stuff. Lovely time :) Am practically asleep in my cab though...

Friends. Arty stuff. Lovely time :) Am practically asleep in my cab though...

Don't tell drill sergeant bugs, she make me do laps or clean out the latrines!

What did you do tonight norf? Friends? Work colleagues?

Ooh, hello faif.

Am trotting sleepily home, after an evening out.

Am trotting sleepily home, after an evening out.

I'm snuggled in the hay. On a downer tonight :( just fed up with life. Reckon I need strong painkillers and a good nights sleep, followed by playing with DNephew tomorrow to perk me up.
Enjoy the woo cavey secretly curious to know if it works

faif it depends on how my body reacts. I have a scan on Monday. As I understand it, if my ovaries are asleep and my lining is thin, they will tell me to start on stimms alongside the downregging drugs (hopefully a lower dose). I think most people are on both for about 10 days or so. Then you take the trigger shot and have egg collection, then it is just progesterone until BFN or 12th week of pregnancy of it works. So if all goes as it ideally should, I have around 2 more weeks of the downregging/stimming drugs. Which normally wouldn't seem like a long time but at the moment feels like an age.

Bugs I never had much in the way of reasons. It was pure hormonal broodiness that made me want a baby. Today I am feeling more resigned to going through with this to see what happens but I still feel strongly that I don't want to get pregnant this way so the potential "prize" of winning a baby is not driving me.

If you were to continue, how much longer would it be to finish this cycle?

I don't swear much but TFI Friday! I am fed up at work. I am frustrated and don't feel supported by my manager :( I have requested a meeting so I can do my return to work (never had one even though I was off sick for 7 weeks and have now been back for 6 weeks and have had another episode in between). Just happy to have two days off to chill out now! What's everyone up to this weekend?

I think you probably are,faif. I am never good when I feel like I have been backed into a corner. That's what led to my freak out when I was supposed to start IVF a few months ago. I called up as agreed to tell them my period had started and then next thing I knew, a big box of drugs was being delivered to my house and a couple of weeks later I was supposed to start and I felt rushed and panicked.

I also miss feeling in touch with my body . I knew its rhythms and what to expect next and all that has been taken away and replaced by a load of synthetic bollix.

euro do you feel like with the IVF all the control has been taken from you? They dictate when you do the drugs, stimming, down regging etc. before, you could chart, use ov sticks etc, you had the control. So maybe by saying you'd like to stop, it makes you feel like you've taken control. Even if your ultimate choice is to continue with the IVF, it's what you've chosen rather than what's been dictated? Am I close to the mark?

That's exactly it I think Camel. He said last night that I looked happier since we had talked about stopping. The odd thing as that since that conversation, i feel more inclined to carry on for the diagnostic value. I am a very mixed up eurochick at the moment....

Hello BESH

euro glad you're feeling slightly better love. If even the prospect of talking about stopping makes you feel more positive then it sounds like you're on the right track. FWIW I think there are some things that happen in life that make you feel so powerless that even just the act of acknowledging there IS another option can make the situation seem a bit brighter. You never know, you might feel so much better having agreed with KFZK that you could stop that you don't actually need to IYSWIM. Anyway. Whatever feels right has got to be the best answer for you

Hola to everyone else.

Feeling pretty bloody chipper after yesterday's doom and gloom. Have had fantastic 'date day' with HY and it's just been lush. Such a treat to spend grown up time together just being a couple. Have loved every minute of it.

Right enough gushing. He's off to his Pre Stone Roses Gig Drinkathon in a minute so I'm going to attack the piles of shite under the spare bed. Ooooh I do love a good clear out.

Norfy yes, stopping now. When I confessed that I was hoping the IVF wouldn't work, he suggested stopping (which I had already been considering). We were only ever planning to do one cycle of IVF.

In reality, I expect we will go through with it now we have come this far, but we will talk it over more at the weekend.

Whatever the reason (possibly including dwelling happily on a caveman orgy), I'm glad you're feeling better.

Stopping right now, euro? Or you mean finishing the cycle and then leaving it?

Morning ladies. The synching is odd. Apparently groups of women synch to make it easier for cavemen to sh@g them in some giant ovulation-fuelled orgy. Be afraid, ladies, be very afraid.

I am feeling slightly better today. I'm not sure if that is because the drugs are having less effect as I get used to them or because we are going to discuss stopping the IVF at the weekend and I feel relief at that prospect.

BTW, IVF droid is minging. It started off pretty normal for the first few days but now I have a load of nasty brown sludge. Eugh. This is particularly inconvenient because although the downregging drugs are likely to kill libido, I am dying for a sh@g! I guess there had to be one side effect from the long list that I didn't get...

I must have gone to the loo about 10 times last night. It was most annoying. Only topped by the twats next to me playing guitars and violins at 1.30am.