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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

The BESH Republic Of Rulvakia

987 replies

queenrollo · 15/05/2012 10:41

Welcome to The BESH Republic Of Rulvakia. The national drink is of course gin, state funded to get you into a state. We have many traditions and customs, such as sechsing, swearing for the fun of it (optional) and urinating on little white sticks.
Enemy of the state is Droid, who must be heckled heartily should it put in an appearance. There is an ongoing lottery to win a baybee, being granted citizenship of The Republic is your ticket to the lottery.

As a democracy all members are entitled to put forward any customs or rules they would like and we can all adopt important but silly titles if we like. See the George Carlin sketch about hats and religion and make your own mind up about whether you would like a ceremonial hat to accompany whichever title/role you bestow upon yourself.

Newcomers should find and complete the BESHtionnaire so we can make sure you are cynical and non-fluffy enough to be granted Citizenship.

OP posts:
Original poster
queenrollo · 17/05/2012 16:46

i also have a Barbarella outfit, a Poison Ivy costume (home made, i'm never sewing silk flowers onto anything ever again), and German Prison Officers uniform (with hat! it's a great hat. ), and tweed plus fours/country gal get up.

I seem to have more fancy dress than normal clothes Hmm maybe i should start wearing it in rotation when I do the weekly shopping. My friends wouldn't bat an eyelid....

OP posts:
HaveALittleFaithBaby · 17/05/2012 16:32

Indeed. I'm trying not to judge. We did the sechs the other night, after a week away with our family and then the friend staying it was nice to not have to be quiet!
Wow norf! We're virtually in sync. Just like the band :)

Northey · 17/05/2012 16:24

Ah well, sometimes the dynamics of other people's relationships are just beyond all understanding. At least you have your house back for uninhibited sechsing now.

Oh - you asked what CD I am. CD18 today, so I ovulated somewhere between CD16 and today.

HaveALittleFaithBaby · 17/05/2012 16:21

Both, prepare for every eventuality. Know you start to understand why my nickname was luggage queen in my teens!
I have opted for my own version of the spell, I bought MSB a bottle of Spring Breeze which has a picture of a goddess of fertility on it Hmm Grin Well it might make him happy enough with me to get him into bed! Wink
Oh an update on the drama with MSB's friend: turns out it was no photos, just a couple of texts. She sounds rather menkul intense. She started sending texts to him saying she was going to see her ex and do all kind if things with him Hmm. Anyway, Tuesday night she told him to collect the rest of his stuff duo he went round. Then she invited him to stay...so they're trying to work out if they stay together but he's looking for somewhere to rent to give them both head space. The mind boggles.

Northey · 17/05/2012 16:21

What a lovely spell! I even have some poppy seeds in my baking cupboard. I might give it a go, if I can decide on a god/fairy/universe to address.

Original poster
queenrollo · 17/05/2012 16:16

i even have a remarkable kaftan.

blimey, I haven't even started on the gin yet. maybe that's where i'm going wrong...

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Original poster
queenrollo · 17/05/2012 16:09

for the spell you need

a candle. a plain white one will be fine, but green is the colour for fertility if you would rather use one.
a small piece of green cloth, and a ribbon to tie it with.
handful of soil
some seeds. Poppy seeds are traditionally associated with fertility but any seed will do.

you put the soil and the seeds in the cloth and tie it with the ribbon. Then you light the candle. the next part is intuitive to how you personally feel. You can sit the parcel next to the candle, or hold it in your hands. You stare at meditate on the flame, and think quietly to yourself about what it is you want. You can visualise the seeds growing, or visualise a baby growing inside you. You can ask the universe/god/goddess/gin fairy to grant your wish/give you strength as you wait for what you want. Whatever you feel comfortable with really. Once you are happy that you've done this for long enough then you can blow the candle out (some would leave it to burn right down, but I don't)

After this then you can put the parcel near your bed or wherever you're going to be sechsing and that's it.

Cavorting naked while casting is optional Grin

It's not the sort of woo I hold with in a magical way, but more as a meditation for positive thought. But every person has their own beliefs. I don't go with the whole potions aspect of spells....mixing cocktails is my kind of magic Grin

this is not getting my packing done. Now do I take the British army uniform, or the hideous 80's cocktail dress. or both. I already have a remarable kaftan for the suggested theme of Flower Power. Or maybe i should crack out the Bo-Peep-goes-toMoulin-Rouge outfit.

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HaveALittleFaithBaby · 17/05/2012 15:20

Yeah I've delayed mine cos this cycle l was on holiday in the 'right' week and then knew I was due to ov over the weekend do it'll be June for me if I don't get my win this time! I'm not unduly concerned either.

eurochick · 17/05/2012 15:07

I think so Faif. Normally any time after Droid is ok, but I am sure I read somewhere that if there is any possibility you could be pregnant (yeah right) you shouldn't have it done so that rules out the 2ww.

And I think I am in the US for that small window next month, so it will have to be a month late. I'm not that bothered. I figure if there was anything absnormal down there, one of the cast of thousands that has peered up there recently would have noticed.

Nice egg work norfy. And I love the idea of you having a norf-west passage. Grin

HaveALittleFaithBaby · 17/05/2012 14:57

All go this morning! Excellent ovving norf! What cd are you? Will you likely have a short normal for most people! cycle? Well it sounds like the clomid is doing its job!
I am Envy about the going away/dressing up queenie, it sounds like lots of fun. I am actually being abandoned this weekend. MSB grew up in Luton so he supports Luton FC (apparently he can support both them and Man U) and they are in a play off final Sunday so he's off to Luton to say with his Nan Saturday night. I declined the invite, I need a quiet weekend after going back to work this week!
euro I too must attend my smear. What fun! Does it need to be after droid but before egg laying? I must ring and book it.
Overall I think I'm feeling more positive. Despite dreading going back to work, the bad stuff hasn't been too bad and I realised how much I enjoy some of it! I need to make sure I don't wallow in the office too much but get out and do the bits I like :)

Northey · 17/05/2012 14:54

Oh yes please. What a shame we missed Beltane. But June woo sounds excellent. Rulvakia needs some weirdy traditions.

Original poster
queenrollo · 17/05/2012 14:34

by the way all this talk of spells, I know of one. Even though I am interested in all things woo even I haven't bothered with it. Really the best day to do a fertility spell is on Beltane (May Day), but summer solsitice is good too (june is auspicious month for weddings and baybees).
I can share it if anyone wants a laugh is interested.

I am supposed to be packing the caravan. I have distracted myself with tea and cake and youtube. Am trying to learn a new song...

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Northey · 17/05/2012 14:26

Interesting! So not all horses, then. Just some.

My scanning is being done at the hospital in Ascot. I always think of you when I walk past the racecourse ground place.

CaveMum · 17/05/2012 14:04

Force of habit Norf! When we write about certain horses it is common to put the name in caps so that the spelling is clear - some horses have very similar names.

Fun Fact - Frankel was named after an American racehorse trainer called Bobby Frankel who died of cancer in 2009. He was the father of Bethenny Frankel, a US reality tv star.

[font of useless information]

Northey · 17/05/2012 13:56

Is it a racing world thing to put the names of horses in capitals, cavey?

Original poster
queenrollo · 17/05/2012 13:48

i've spent a lovely hour this morning catching up with an old friend. Was a bit Confused when I realised I haven't seen her properly for 20 years! I refuse to admit I'm old enough for this to be true.
I've trailed round town to get stocked up for our weekend away. Can't get rice cakes anywhere. Why not? I know they are like eating cardboard but a good cupboard staple when festivalling.
I really have to get on and get the caravan packed and sort out my clothes. Mind you it's looking like another three days of fancy dress beckon....

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CaveMum · 17/05/2012 13:06

Whoop whoop for egg popping Norf. Should we declare a Day of Celebration? [any excuse for a Wine]

HWHNN called me last night to say he'll be back later today. It's quite amusing because, obv, the telephone lines are not secure so he can't actually say where he is/what he is doing. When I answered the phone he said "I'm calling you from, erm, abroad!" Hmm. I had kinda figured that out!

Droid has almost gone away so we'll get with the sechsing over the weekend.

We're going racing at Newbury on Saturday to watch FRANKEL have his first run of the year. FYI, Frankel is rated as the best racehorse in the world at the moment: he is unbeaten in 9 races and valued at £100million+. If you get the chance look him up on You Tube and watch him win the 2,000 Guineas (a very important race). He was mind blowing! This will be the third time I've seen him run "in the flesh" and I've promised myself I'll follow him all over the country this year - a perk of my job Grin

Northey · 17/05/2012 12:42

I ovulated! Wheeee! Today's scan shows that my mega egg zit has popped at some point since last Tuesday, and the smaller one is just sitting there and will probably be reabsorbed. I had sex last night, so hopefully that was reasonably well timed.

The norf-west passage sends sympathy to the eurofrou.

polecat, my ectopic re-set the clock for IVF entitlement, but not for other types of intervention.

eurochick · 17/05/2012 11:40

Morning peasants.

I have just got my smear reminder through. There is a helluva a lot of traffic up my froufrou at the moment. I used to get a bit nervous about them. I think I am past that now! I've had at least 6 fanny cams since Xmas, plus a cervical swab and 2 iuis! KFZK is starting to get a bit jealous at how many people he is having to share the eurofrou with.

sinkingflameofhilarity · 16/05/2012 22:14

Wait a minute!

My hat!

It's bald!

Who dunnit?

I think going to the docs can't hurt shred. Is your cycle regular? If not then you've really got a reason to see someone.

I'm v excited for your follicle drizzly, and the basting - it's all looking good!

I'm currently menkulling about mild droidal like cramps far too early to be anything significant, unless, of course, it's implantation type activity. Yeah right..

GHJ has had to stay late at work to tend to some cells. He thinks he'll be home about 2.. Hmm

HaveALittleFaithBaby · 16/05/2012 22:12

Yes I fink it's been enough time. See what the GP has to say!

ShredniVashtar · 16/05/2012 21:51

It's been 17 months now, faif, but I'm not sure if the clock gets re-set following an ectopic. But the surgeon said to go to GP if no luck after 6 months, and it's been that now, so hopefully will get something moving. Will see what she says I guess.

Longer title definitely equals bigger hat

HaveALittleFaithBaby · 16/05/2012 20:57

Ah but norf did she not say it failed to work?! I wonder if the seller was all woo and sincere or saw her customers coming?!
polecat remind me how long it's been? I'd be pushing to see a specialist. It depends on your area as to what they do when. I had three day 21 bloods done consecutive cycles and my GP referred me for the fanny cam and got MSB's appointment for checking his chaps. Then we went to a gynae endocrinologist - appt in my name but really for both of us. Then they requested a HSG and repeat SA for MSB. However my friend is a GP in Brum and she said they don't do anything beforehand there but if a couple has been ttc over a year they referred them!
I'm well excited for lems and norf, sounding super positive jobs wise! I had a luffly morning and remembered what I like about my job :)

Northey · 16/05/2012 20:56

Yep, seriously. And I definitely didn't immediately open a new window to google for fertility spells. No sirree.

Does a longer title come with a bigger hat?

ShredniVashtar · 16/05/2012 20:45

A spell? Seriously? I might have to extend my title to Defender of the Realm against the Droid and People Who Try to Sell Random Shit to Desperate Women in that case.

Really? A spell? Sorry. Genuinely Shock