Just MC and ready to try again? Pregnant after MC and seeking somewhere safe to hide? Come on down to the mosh pit for some serious metalling and cake overindulgence

Mumtum, I hope you get good news tomorrow. You are in my thought.

Marbles, sorry about AF. I was so hopeful for you.

Manda, I am thinking of you too. I hope you gather enough physical
and emotional energy to get through it all.

Tiago, Addenbrookes is my hospital! I did the POPs trial with my DD. The extra scans were fab! (in pre metal days).

Midget, loved the comedy syphillis story. Has the bleeding stopped? Hope so.

Tas, glad you are back here again! Lots of luck.

Pebs, so glad you had a good appointment with Raj Rai. I hope you get some answers.

Martha, good luck with the tests.

My discharge is improving so huge sigh of relief. Having some twinges, but they feel very stretchy rather than crampy.

Waves to boris, state, tits,poppy,pie, kirrin and anyone I have missed.

oh marbles so sorry the-bitch AF got you i have a feeling i am not far behind as i-did four ICs tonight all with BFNs i am just bloody hormonal with those stabby pains which imply AF is on her way

if so i am on the wine this weekend!!

So much to catch up on...

Good luck Tas and great news Tiago.

Boris I think DH had clotting tests too but we have had so many bloody tests over the last few years they all merge into one.

Manda you should be getting your hand held. I was surprised at how the consultants took my issues so seriously yesterday (actually more seriously than I do and we all know what a mettaller I am). I think it is the least good care providers should do. I struggled to start speaking up for myself and I am also not normally backwards in coming forward. It was my DH who went into all teh things that went wrong and then I realised how shit/dangerous it really was. Shall I come down with you and lick them into submission? Sounds like you need someone by your side speaking up for your concerns.

MumTum get the hell away from google. We can drive ourselves demented like I did all day on Tuesday. Knowledge is power but random threads full of mentalists aren't not that any of us are like that.

Marbles thank god you have an appointment, so worrying for you all until you know what you are dealing with. Big raspberries to shoulder surgery and AF though.

Pebs so glad you got on well with Raj Raj. Makes such a difference when you find someone who listens and understands. I was so relieved just after my first consult with the nurse specialist at St Marys as it just seemed like someone was listening to it all, in a holistic way. And it was the first time really. Hope things start to move for you.

Kirrin congrats on coming out - hope it didn't freak you out too much.

martha I don't want to have to come to you to kick AF so good luck POAS.

I am sure I have forgotten someone important but the TIVO box is calling me so some much needed catch up TV vegging. I am still getting over syphilisgate

hi all, haven't popped on for a while but have been lurking -
jaffa so sorry you've had such a rough time but glad the tests all came back negative, rest up now, you deserve a break
midget glad you have good news too
manda very excited for you, not long now!
marbs sorry AF has hit you again
tiago great news on your scan
pebs glad Raj appt was good
state hang on in there
Marbs and martha good luck with this month, I hope your DHs are up to it
iq if you're still lurking, hope that lovely baby is letting you have some sleep (lovely name btw, great minds!)

to everyone else, it seems like you all have good news, but have only skimmed the thread so apologies if I've missed something

We're TTC now, I'm in the 2ww, I'll join you marbs, boris and martha and anyone else (and root out that stats thread).

I've been madly baking bread for some reason, so I'll bring to the party - walnut and cherry bread, tomato and olive foccaccia and some choc brownies

Manda wow that seems like it has come around so quickly (for me, probably feels like a long time for you ;) ) really wishing you a smooth and straightforward time of it and like everyone else eagerly awaiting news!!!!!

Blue that must mean you're up soon too my lovely - how exciting How are you doing?

All of these imminent babies are reminding me that it has been almost a year since my MC and when I joined this amazing group of ladies. Can I just say once again, THANK YOU!!! To all of you, and especially those "old-timers" out there who have been with me on my journey for all of this time (and a special thank you to those who are about to produce (and already have IQ I speak to you!) hearing how you have been getting on over the past few months has provided some much needed positive vibes....

Anyway, I'll stop now before I start blubbing.....I guess the hormones are still a bit haywire at 23 weeks.....

AF arrived this afternoon

Fingers crossed for you martha

pops on to say manda am eagerly lurking for your news (just wanted to let you know!) and I hope DS has a smooth arrival into the world :) xx

tiago great news! I am still fretting every day that something will be wrong and feel like i'm wishing away the next 7 weeks!

kirren thanks! although... that's kinda my problem. I do have sneeze births (well, the last two, it took an hour to get to 4cms, then 40 more mins until birth). I am GBS+ so need antibiotics during labour (didn't have time last time, obviously, and as DS2's infection markers were high he had IV antibiotics for 3 days - not the happiest start to life). I'm also of a distance from the hospital that means during rush hour I could end up birthing at the side of the road...add to that my morbid fear of a life threatening PPH such as after my loss and all in all I just wanna be in the hospital when things start (ie, to have the anti biotics started, then induced and bobs my uncle, fanny's my aunt, I am in The Right Place if things move as suddenly as usual or if things go Tits Up). Oh, add in that DS2 was 9lb 12oz and although I birthed him ok, I'm aware of the increased risk of should dystocia if this babe proves to be of a size such as his brother (or, woe, outdoes him...). I just wanna be MANAGED! If I was in the States, they'd be bending over backwards to intervene - it's their default position! (not saying that's best - I actually prefer our more hands off, it's a natural process way - just that when you've been on the wrong side of statistics a few times, when you have genuine concerns (as well as irrational ones!), when you just need a little more hand holding... it seems the hand is reluctant to be there).

Wow. Rant much?

Innyhoo, I've got a bit of an off tummy today... when I went into labour with DS2 that's how it started (altthough I only twigged it with hindsight). I'm such a tease, eh? I actually feel a little bit queasy too so it's probably NO! NOT THE RETUEN OF THE NOROVIRUS! just a bit of a bug or something.

If I get as far as next appointment, I'll bring up the bishop score far even though I don't relish the idea of being rummaged around with for them to say 'Hey, come back next week!'. DF can't really come in with me as he has to look after DS2 - the curse of daytime appointments; other daycare options are at work or college.

Right ladies. I have officially begun to breathe agan. 14+2 scan today at noon and......all is good. Baby is still measuring perfectly for an EDD of 6 November and was wriggling around. Baby is still incredibly stubborn though - refused to pose for more than 2 pictures. He is apparently now 9cms long and has little hands and feet with fingers and toes :) Still too early to tell the sex (grump) but that's fine.

I've signed up to the Pregnancy Outcomes Predition Study that Addenbrookes is currently running. They give you 2 extra scans (at 28 and 36 weeks) for free and take blood samples, and then will analyse the data to see if there is any way to predict various outcomes/illnesses/etc from the various scans and results.

mumtum I'll have all my fingers and toes crossed for you tomorrow xxx

marbles we share a birthday! I've had a few more than you though. You must be very worried about DD but she is now on the road to diagnosis which can only be a good thing?

Jaffa enjoy your trip!

manda maybe next week! How exciting! Here's hoping for a spontaneous labour and a sneeze birth

I have told people at work so now I am official - bit scary and I'm counting down the days til my 16 week scan - even though I don't have a date yet

mumtum I have done my fair share of creating pg symptoms. Like eating too much so I feel sick, poking my boobs till they're sore, making extra trips to the loo even though I don't really need to. Hang on in there.

manda and martha thank u girls the support from here is just amazing it's so hard when in rl no one knows except dh and i feel it's so unfair to lay all my mentalling on him the minute he gets in from work so I try not to but I've no one else to over share with so thank u.

I've been googling like mad loss of symptoms between 7-8 weeks and for as many 'this is normal it happened to me and dc is now next to me' stories there are just as many 'I knew something was wrong and I was right I mmc' so confused and in for a sleepless or nightmare filled with empty sacs and blank scan screens night tonight I so wish I could feel more positive but it's so hard.... Maybe I'm a bit bonkers to ... Even considered a cheese sandwich earlier with big milkshake .... Not unusual u may think BUT I'm dairy intolerant and this would be a sure fire way of making me puke thus I could then induce ms type symptoms now really who in there right mind would consider trying to intentionally give themselves fake pregnancy symptoms to stop metalling?!?! well me obviously!!!! im just so fed up anxious and scared that I am quite literally going mad

pebs I am so pleased you liked Rai and that he has thought of some other angles for you. Here is hoping it solves the problem for you.

jaffa wonderful, wonderful news, that has made my day.
Bring on the 2nd trimester!!!

manda how frustrating for you! Can you take your DH with you to the next meeting, its hard to make your point clearly without feeling vulnerable given everything you have gone through? Your mental health should also be of paramount importance at this stage (althouh agreed this has to be balanced with inducing you too early) I don;t know much about it but can you ask for them to assess your bishop score? Apparently this can be quite a good indication as to whether induction will work or not?

Ah, and I've been meaning to say, marbles how worrying for you re: DD.

When I was a teen, my friend had her first epiletic fit when she was with me. It happened whilst we were crossing a road (luckily, a quiet one!). She stood stock still in the middle of the road, looked skywards, and started spinning around. I was obviously and kept asking her what she was playing at until she went to the floor and was unresponsive. These were the days pre-mobiles, so I panicked dragged her to the curb (no one around) and ran my arse off to the nearest telephone box to call an ambulance. She eventually grew out of her 'episodes' and I really hope that as DD's are presenting so early that it will also be the case for her too.

Given how it must be consuming much of your thoughts (and time - bet you're watching her like a hawk?) I can't really think there's any better birthday present than starting to get to the bottom of things and hopefully manage the condition in a way that means life can start to return to normality. Perhaps not exactly as before, but as we like to say here: knowledge is power.

for you (and DD!)

Looks like I x-posted with mumtum before I left... AND I had you in my thoughts as I typed my original post - was going to say 'Isn't mumtum due her follow up scan today? - but ti somehow escaped my sieve of a brain.

Sickness bugs really don't pose a risk to a pregnancy directly. The risk ramps up if you become severely dehydrated or if for some reason your temp sky rockets. But, duh, any little sniffle let alone full-on norovirus hell is enough to make us metal so I totally understand why it's made you feel so glum. Especially if your boobies aren't sore any more... but, y'know, that can come and go and mean nada (my boobs suddenly got extremely sore at 15 weeks after not being sore at all until that point... then it wore off again after a few weeks to return in the early 30-ish weeks... Gone again now!)

I'm really hoping you get some good news tomorrow but we're here whatever the outcome - to cheer with you, or cry with you.

So. I saw my consultant. Can I get a 'For!', a 'Fucks!', a 'Sake!' whaddia we got? FOR FUCKS SAKE!

I understand his rationale, I do. But, seriously... he wants me to go back to clinic next week to check 'how low' baby is (currently 4/5 although two days ago midwife seemed to think 3/5 engaged so he's either popping in and out (expected in subsequent pregnancies) or it's one of those subjective measurements that just doesn't marry) because if the baby isn't very low then induction probably won't work and 'we don't want to end up with a ceasarian'. No shit. Although why didn't I think to say 'but subsequent babies often don't engage at all until labour'? Why, when I'm usually so quick witted did I just sit there nodding like a mute dolt? He even trotted out 'even if you get the two doses of IV antibiotics, it's no guarantee the baby won't need them anyway...' and I just nodded. Instead of saying 'well, what would be the clinical point of administering them to the mother in that case?' I feel an impotent rage building! Although I got a bit teary on the way home...

So I have no date. Saying that was a false alarm. Sorry But on the other hand I went into spontaneous labour with DS2 at 40+2 so I may well have a baby next week yet. Just not in the more 'controlled' manner that I feel is important for my mental health

morning!!

manda one week left??!! wow exciting stuff!!

hope everyone is having an excellent thursday

i finally had my appointment for my shoulder pain this morning...possibly surgical but need to see a consultant and have physio first. also tendonitis and lupus related so i should be getting somewhere to have it fixed soon

DD has her referral to neuro paeds on my birthday! it was on 15th june but i didnt feel it was very good to have to wait 5 weeks so asked for an earier appt and the earliest was 28th may...happy 30th to me but it was either that or the 13th june and DD comes first (obviously) so my birthday it is then she has had a few more episodes, one big one in the bath and another in the middle of the road so it needs investigating... she fell down the stairs about 2 weeks ago too and it has made me think maybe that is what caused it as if she was stepping down the step and went absent...she may have missed the step without knowing as she rolled down the stairs and had no idea how it happened. its weird seeing it happen.

feel sick this morning and heartburn-y too...

martha im going to buy some HPTs today (CD27) in preparation for testfest saturday AMas i have none in at the mo...not like me AF is most likely going to rock up on time but its good to be prepared...sprry about your BFN but as you said its likely too early so fingers crossed...

Morning all.

manda next week wow, good luck

pebspop good luck with your follow up apts Raj rai sounds a brilliant help x

Excellent news tits I am so pleased for you.

shit manda you are having your baby NEXT WEEK!!!

i am really excited - no really, i am soooooo excited

sorry forgot to say:

phew for jaffa - hope this discharge is nothing to worry about.

good luck to manda if you go into labour!!

hello to everyone else - i need to work now as i have been off all week and got loads of work on now.

just a quick one - got loads of work to do eekkk!

went to raj rai yesterday. he was really nice and did a couple of blood tests for me which i hadn't already had on nhs. he is writing a letter to my consultant to recommend my dh is tested for blood clotting disorders and for me to be recommended to liverpool for a hysteroscopy.

hopefully it won't take too long to get the appointment at liverpool but looks like i will have to put ttc on hold for a few months until it's all sorted.

he said if dh has blood clotting disorders it could affect my placenta as the placenta has the same genetic makeup as the baby (which is 50%) dh.

i will ring my local consultant next week to get the referral process started.

raj rai was really nice and positive - i might see him again in future if i need a bit of advice or support.

he said i could be referred to london but to be honest it was a pain in the ass to get there so i couldn't cope with that all the time esp. in early pg.

Well, everyone (seems you've all asked!) I'm 39 weeks today. So, very much 'term'. But I'm pretty sure all this grumbling my uterus has been doing isn't labour/pre-labour. Which suits me FINE (you will all recall my spectacular denial and how very much I'm not prepared practically?). Called for my blood results yesterday which are 'normal'. So I'm still something of an enigma!

Consultant appointment today to agree an induction date for next week - so you can fret on a specific day, marff - can't have you all panicky for an indefinite period now, can we? The consultant midwife I saw t'other day has already spoken to him about me so I'm hoping it'll be an in-and-out appointment that literally gives me a date and time to turn up next week. I've ordered a tens machine too on the midwifes recommendation as the thought of another rapid labour with no pain relief (other than a few half hearted puffs on gas and air - I felt silly on it, and bit the mouthpiece more than I did suck on it! - which didn't do much other than induce a slight woozy feeling I didn't particularly enjoy) is something else putting me in a bit of a tailspin.

And, how is it the universe seems to conspire against us every now and then? As I said, highly emotional the evening of my day at the hospital. Then I see an email from Boots baby club 'Your Baby is 8 Months' that was, like, Ooooooft! (that's me getting kicked ) and Huh?! ( because I'd cancelled all the notifications when I lost Teddy and have not had one from them at any other stage...) Weirdness. It's almost like I'm getting 'signs' I have to face up to stuff.

Innyhoo, enough rambling about me.

tits Great news! Now all we need to do is sort out your duff gp, get you back on the sickness meds and things are going swimmingly for you!

marff don't threaten to shag the life outta DH - you know he'd love it

jaffa SO glad you've been ordered by the crap MiL who has finally come good to do exactly as I have said! Insomnia is par for the course, I think, in pregnancy - even when utterly exhausted beyond words. It's one of lifes little cruelties! Here's hoping the trip is a good one and, hey, you're totally gonna need that bigger house now

sorry x posts mumtum ok so whatever i say cannot reassure you so i suggest you take a seat in the VIP area sit yourself down with manda soothe eachothers brows and help yourselves to some delightful danish pastries.

the-rest of you can slum it in the cattle class cafe with sausage butties and milky tea

I am out with DS tomorrow for his hosp appointment (routine, for his cataract) but i will check on MN later in the day. I will also be thinking of you at 11 and secretly hoping that all is well, but if not - here we all are for support xxx