Angels and Rainbows - The beauty of a rainbow does not negate the ravages of the storm. But it can provide colour and hope.

Hello everyone
too and trickle what is a kindle??
blue poor dd, spots can look hideous and itch like mad!!! Both my children have scars from scratching them. It is certainly no fun looking after children when you feel rotton yourself so you have huge sympathies from me.

My GTT results were perfect.......maybe its time to lay off the sugary drinks!! Still have quite high bp though, 149/95, which is strange for me as my usual is 120/60......nothing is ever simple!!
Well, I wish you all a very nice weekend, pouring of rain here so not sure what we will get up to.

Angel, so sorry to hear about Ant being made redundant. Did you get any more info from his employers? FX for a new job for him very quickly.

Trickle, hope you feel better soon. You can post from a Kindle? How? Have just got a Kindle and haven't learned everything it does yet.

Blue, hope DD1 gets better soon. Chicken pox itchiness is awful! Try coolish baths to soothe her. FX for your hubby too.

Cheese, how are you doing, my lovely?

My pelvis hurts. Not sure if this is because I mopped the kitchen floor yesterday or because I walked for 20 minutes today. Not liking this at all!

computer is under the weather and so am I - 'only'morning sickness though so I'm fine with that. I'm making a first ever post from my kindle, which isn't really designed for this but I think it's working. Will have to thank my mum once she knows I'm pregnant - it was her idea she was so worried about me being stuck in bed and out of touch with everyone when I was ill or pregnant though thats not exactly the case right now it's still brilliant.
Wish I could wave a majic wand for some of you - moneysavingsexpert is brilliant for anyone with financial hiccups. There are millions in unclaimed atate support every year,my claim was complicated and I didn'tnow the CAB could help so I had to research the legislation and was refused three times because the decision maker didn't know about it and kept refusing to check passed a routine denile -I'vecome acrosss peoplein the same situation and it's always people who work hard and have been 'doing the right thing' that fall foul of lesser known parts of the safety net designed for exceptional circumstnces butnot routine so notknown about.

Blue good luck to your hubby for 14 th. Hope DD better soon. " savings"???!!! what are those? Don t have a penny!! Had about £500 earlier this year but had to pat £400 of that out when our cat , Scottie was put to sleep & £200 for our boiler to be fixed 2 weeks ago. No savings now & no chance of getting any. X

poor little thing is very itchy :( we've put socks on her hands so she doesn't scratch during the night!
Off to bed now x

August I was wondering who the friend request was from, I have accepted you.

Blue- hope your cough goes away soon and Ella is not too itchy.

hi all! still very tired and coughy... DD1 has chicken pox and not feeling great! We've been taking it easy... lots of cuddles and watching the tellie

Angel I hope Ant will find a nicer job very soon!
DH has his last test to pass as a driving instructor on 14 Feb and he needs to pass or we'll be in a similar situation! No savings as we've used those up in the last year to get by while he was training and establishing business.

Too so sorry the hospital were rubbish!

razz how were your results?

August thanks for the add! I thought that name looked familiar

so tired... better get DD to bed and then order a take away... don't feel like cooking

I missed a page I think! Reading back again...

Hi cheese just wanted to say I'm thinking of you and also that Jacob was breech and I delivered him 'easily' - he was small, 4lbs, at 35 weeks so not the same as delivering a full term baby but I just wanted to say for reassurance in case you do have to deliver soon and go down the vb route and not a section. Good luck x
Whatever how you feeling? Is DH talking about things yet?
Too I reckon they're just covering their backs lovely. Must make you so angry. I kind of know where you're coming from - I had SUA and found out that if seen you should have serial growth scans in 3rd trimester and also amniocentesis to rule out other abnormalities but they didn't check for it at my 20 wk scan, when it's apparently routine, because I was low-risk they just didn't bother. They've glossed over it as a contributing factor now obviously so I don't question why it wasn't picked up but I can tell the consultant knows they screwed up - she got seriously flustered when I asked her if they'd check for it at my 20 wk scan this time and she told me it's routine and then realised what she'd said. It upsets me but we can't change the past now.
Omg trickle that sounds like a hard time you're having. I find life overwhelming as it is without having to worry about getting around - I hope you have lots of support with this little one - he or she will be glued to your boob for the first few weeks/months so as long as you've got someone to make you tea and pass nappies and wipes you'll be grand! :o)
Hi Spilt, blizy, fan (sorry AF got you )
Good luck ttcers.
PS Blue, cheese and blizy I found you on fbook... Profile pic is ofme and my son in the sea in case you didn't know who I was! Whatever I can't find you...

Thanks Ciwi hope u re ok? How many weeks are you now?
Too hope you get your results soon. Think mine took about a week to come through.I checked on line last night re; tax credits & working tax credits & we/ me are entitled to a big fat zero!!! It stinks. Our mortgage deal doesn t include payment holidays I can afford to cover everything with my wage when I m back to my normal pay at the end of April but as my current mat wage is £450 less a month than I normally get don t know... Ant been to agencies today & there's potential for a temp HR position however only 21 hours so wr would have to reduce Pheb's nursey hours & Ant would have her when not working as he'd only be earning a half wage. The other post is permanent full time so just awaiting interviews.... I m so pissed off with the way his employers ate treating him. Gave him redundancy notice 10 mins before the end of working day then said have some time off & we ll have a meeting next Monday.
Who do they think they are?? So he's been ringing to arrange to go in tomorrow as we ve this uncertainty hanging over our heads all weekend.
Whatever very good advice ..thanks I ll talk to Ant about it.
It's of a comfort to know some of you gave experienced the same. We ve been here before ( not for a few years though) it's just we thought we were settled & it's come totally out of the blue .
Been to change my bank account & got £ 100 out if that deal so not bad there!!!
Love to all xxxx
Thanks for advice lovelies xxx

Hi everyone,
cheese I am thinking of you and hope your little one is going to stay in your incubator for a bit longer. If not, babies born after 30 weeks tend to do very well though you may need to stay in hospital for a bit till she is feeding ok. I know of a baby born recently at 31 weeks who is going home next week just 4 weeks after being born x
angel Its awful about your dh and I agree with you that sometimes things are just sent to try us. I would second the advice on asking about a mortgage holiday and just checking about working tax credit as you class as if you are working while on mat leave, you can put your income in on line to see if you would qualify or not x
razz hope the gtt is ok, my sister has to go for one next week x
too I am shocked at that midwife, I only hope that she made a mistake and is not trying to deliberatly get out of it.
fan I havent seen a single community midwife this pregnancy, all my care is at the hospital so it should be possible.
trickle I agree that your booking should be earlier this time, mine was at 5 and a half weeks this pregnancy.
Hi everyone else x

Hello all
too Im so sorry that the hospital have left you feeling even more frustrated and angry. Be kind to yourself, deep breaths. I would also be furious at a cover up and blatant lies. As others have said only you and dh can decide the way forward.
cheese my thoughts and prayers are with you and I am so pleased you are being monitored so well.
angel that sucks for you and Ant. We are in a very similar position at the moment and bashing our heads against a wall for any kind of help. Dh had to sit an eligability test for jobseekers can you believe despite having a british passport and looking totally british!!! Our mortgage company will not help at all and we have a huge redemption fee to pay to leave them. My wage only covers half the mortgage as I am part time and I will not qualify for any mat pay. I have been told though that I can claim working tax credit as dh wage when in dubai was tax free so cant be taken into account......shocking!! The stress of unemployment is so very tough so I really do feel for you.
fan I am sure given what you have been through that there is a very real possibility that you could be just consultant led in your next pregnancy. I have been lucky this time in that my mw is really lovely, similar to too's experience really. I do have a fair bit of consultant input though.
Im back to work tonight......boo. Can you believe that I feel sad at being seperated from dh for the night, never in my life have I been like that before. Also the thought of fitting my ever expanding bump onto the single bed is very depressing!! Had my GTT yesterday, so should get the results today. I feel well so hopeful that the results will be good.

I was wondering with all this talk of booking in appointments, that when Im next pg, would I want a community midwife looking after me, or would I prefer to have it all done at the hospital. And even if there is an option for that. Im not sure I trust the community midwives, they seam a bit blase about things. They were not helpful to me after Ophelia had died and to be honest during pg they didnt push any of my needs considering I was partly consultant lead, it took ages for that to organise itself. And maybe that isnt the midwives fault but she didnt exactly help it along. Also now that I have changed boroughs, I will most likely get a midwife from Blakes maternity unit and I had real problems with them last time. I rung them several times when I was 14 weeks, I was bleeding and they wouldnt see me. I ended up going to the doctors and he got me an appointment with QA hospital, all I wanted at the time was a heart check for the baby, and blakes would not give me one. Also when I thought I was in labour they gave me really poor advice, told me to wait it out it didnt sound like labour even though I had been sick, was having strong cramps every 5 minutes and was bleeding. I ended up ringing maternity bleep who really helped me.
So Im kind of feeling that I want my care done through the hospital, do you lot think this is a possibility?

Sorry that was meant for trickle as you gave me the advice!!!xx

Thanks guys. We re not entitled to a penny never have been!! Even when on mat leave as I earn " too much" as we ve been reliably informed in the past!!! You work hard get a good career pay taxes all our lives & we can never get any help. It really fucking stinks. Yet, if we had never worked we would get our rent paid & a load of benefits as my patients regularly tell me. The whole thing is upside down.
Whatever I m currently only paying the interest on our mortgage as dropped it last year when I was off sick after loosing Georgie. Our mortgage company are good but don t see what else they can do as if / when I return to work my wage ( if ant providing childcare) does just about cover everything with very little left. Ant is off to the agencies again today& applied for some HR jobs last night. He's basically got next weeks wage & the end of Feb & that's it.
It stinks they way they've done it given him a letter at 5:20 pm ( finishes at 5;30 pm) & said take the rest of the week off we ll talk next week. So, I ve told him to ring his manager ASAP to find out schedules for timelines etc.. Can he work 4 days a week, any jobs available in their organisation. He normally handles redundancies so knows the protocol etc.... She must have worked with him all day knowing what was coming. Bitch.
I ve not slept much & so pissed off with every time we get on our feet or move foreward we get hit by a massive sledgehammer again.
Tickle with Phebs my booking in appr was late at about 10-11 weeks however, I was having scans every 2 weeks at EPU so was no major rush for the same!!!

angel Sorry you guys are having a shit time, I really hope Ant finds a new job quickly. I have my fingers crossed for you both.

angel so sorry you and ant are having such a bad time. Like trickle says hopefully u are entitled to something.

trickle I would ring them back today, see if you can get an appointment, booking inusually happens at 10 to 12 weeks
But with your history you should be seen quicker.

Also just wondering how long did you guys have to wait for booking appts. I've phoned and left messages and I emailed on monday and they have phoned once while I was in the shower last week and not got back in touch again. I don't remember it being this hard to book in last time, I'm only 7 weeks so it's ages till 12 week scan - but I had my last booking appt at 8 weeks.

Also just wondering how long did you guys have to wait for booking appts. I've phoned and left messages and I emailed on monday and they have phoned once while I was in the shower last week and not got back in touch again. I don't remember it being this hard to book in last time, I'm only 7 weeks so it's ages till 12 week scan - but I had my last booking appt at 8 weeks.

Thanks everyone, can just feel a little like an uphill struggle, and some people in RL can be very rude about my 'entitlement issues'. I'm all too well aware what I am doing is very controversial, I'm not entirely sure it should be. I'm in a very stable long term relationship and I'm not badly educated - can there not be more to life than being a current tax payer? sigh. I don't want to turn this into too much of a benefit thread, it's just very prominent in my life especially at the moment, I've taken a bit of a break from campaigning recently though as it was getting too much.

cheese really hoping things move at a slow pace for you and your little one, hope you are feeling ok

Too That's awful, I'm so sorry they are making things so hard for you, I imagine it's an easy way to put people off complaining - it shouldn't be like that though, it's difsgusting

Angel Can't imagine how stressful all that is, can you get yourself over to moneysavingsexpert.com? I'm unfortunatly quite good at sickness/disability benefit but have never delt with tax credits or in work benefit as I was never entitled while working. Have you been to your local CAB? It's possible with the dip in income that you should be entitled to something, some people while on mat leave even end up entitled to the sure start mat grant as their income has dropped enough due to the mat leave itself. There also may be something called a Community Legal Advice Center or a Community Legal Advice Network where you live, both of these can offer advice and help if you are entitled to legal aid - which with just your reduced income you may well be, they only use present income to determine entitlement, not previous income. really hope there is a net out there just to catch you for a bit - can you ask your mortgage company for a payment holiday or to go interest only for a short while? Most are being quite supportive at the moment.

Fuck,fuck,fuck Ant been told he's been made redundant today. Fucking bastards. We ve been here before & thought now he' d got a career instead of a job with some degree of security. ( he's a HR advisor) been looking at all options. Ie; him providing childcare but that wouldn t be for another 3 months. He is never able to claim anything, we are not entitled to working tax credits or any of that stuff as I earn " too much". My wage is currently depleted by £450 a month due to being on mat leave.
What a fucking bag of shot. Knew our lives were going way too well we never have this much luck. We ve been in this position before & he's taken any job : driving, warehouse etc... But that was before millions of others were looking for work & loves HR it gets him really down when he cant do what he enjoys.
When I return to work my wage just about covers all the bills, mortgage, food , petrol etc... But wouldn t leave much for anything else ie; toiletries, clothes, treats , emergencies ie : our cat or ANYTHING!!!
Was just abour to book a holiday for Sept !!! Don t be stupid Louise get back to u re stress head corner!!!
Shite,shite,shite.
He ll only get a month's pay as been there about 15 months.
Don t know how we ll manage with the mortgage etc.....

Sorry for AF showing up for some of you. I'll keep everything extra specially crossed that it's the last visit for a while xxx

cheese I hope everything goes ok and that they manage to hold things off for a while. Sounds like they're on top of the situation though. I need to have steroids from 26 weeks (am 25+2 today so have an appointment at the hospital next week to have a scan and start the steroids) as they are really worried about this little one arriving early - partly because the cervix was already soft when the stitch went in at 14 weeks, so they are scanning regularly to make sure there is no dilation.

trickle it's outrageous that they won't sort out a chair for you. I'm sorry they're not being more helpful xxx

too I'm sorry the hospital were crap. It's really not on for them to ignore the facts like that. The MW deserves to be sacked.