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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Waiting to try to conceive

839 replies

Amonstercooper · 14/10/2011 08:02

Another thread for those who are waiting to try for a baby. It doesn't matter how long or short the wait; why you are waiting; or how many DC you have. All are welcome.

Old thread here.

OP posts:
SparklyUniMummy · 29/03/2012 21:11

Hi,

Can I join? We are waiting till September to start trying. I'll be in my final year of uni then, so the baby would be due just after I graduate at the earliest (I know, I'm crazy!). My husband works full time, and I want to get my career going when I graduate, we already have a 15 month old little girl, so we also don't want a huge age gap!

pinkbuttons · 29/03/2012 19:20

Sounds like a good plan bugsy thats what were planning on doing but from October. We are waiting mainly due to finance as well as the fact Im currently studying and don't finish my degree till next yr. Just reminding myself its only a few months and enjoying my time with DS.
Definitely stay with us! How exciting to be not not trying :o

mrsbugsywugsy · 29/03/2012 12:15

Thanks pinkbuttons I think that is what we have decided to do, just 'see what happens' for a few months and if we were meant to have a Christmas baby, so be it.

'As much as my head says "no now is not the right time" my heart (and womb) want to be pregnant right now' - yup, I know the feeling. Why is it that you have to wait? (Apologies if you've said in previous posts).

Am I still allowed on this thread if we're not really waiting any more? I don't really feel like I belong on any other the TTC threads yet as we're not really trying either. If nothing happens by the summer then maybe we will step it up a notch

discowomb - I love your name. hope all goes well for you.

pinkbuttons · 28/03/2012 15:38

Oh no fl0b0t hope your feeling better soon.

bugsy It wasn't so much that when I was on delivery suite they were understaffed my issue was that I had high BP at the end of pregnancy and getting checked twice a week and getting consultant appts etc. was a nightmare with short staffing over the holiday. But our main issue is that we've already got one straight after Christmas and couldn't afford another :) Definitely wouldn't let it put you off if you're all ready to start! what will be will be, and what a lovely Christmas present it would be :o

Discowomb Hope all goes well at your next consultant appt.

We still have 7 months to wait until Im officially off the patch, although have had it of this month as had queried BP issues, all fine but it does mean we maybe haven't been as safe as normal this month. As much as I try to tell myself there's not way I can be pregnant I cant help but have the tiniest bit of hope that I am. All would be ok if I was just not ideal but as much as my head says "no now is not the right time" my heart (and womb) want to be pregnant right now. Am working on maternity wards atm so seriously not good for the broodiness! Hope everyone else is coping a bit better than I am atm?

Discowomb · 28/03/2012 08:59

Hello. Can I join you. I'm another one with arthritis. Been off the serious drugs since Jan, and off the pill too, hoping to start TTC our second child next month, assuming all goes well at next consultant appointment. Also a bit wary about a Christmas baby, but need to get pregnant ASAP and know any pregnancy is good when so many people try for years. DD is 21 months. Need to go and read more of the thread now. hermione, having already been through one pregnancy with arthritis (rheumatoid) I'm happy to talk about any thing that might concern you. :)

mrsbugsywugsy · 26/03/2012 23:51

fl0b0t that all sounds painful!

pinkbuttons that is exactly what I am worried about happening! Although I maybe I should just accept that labour will be pretty awful whenever it happens. Do you think they were understaffed because it was NYE?

Our news is that have decided to not exactly actively ttc, but to stop preventing pregnancy for a bit and see what happens. Given my age it will probably take a few months at least, and hopefully something will happen before the point where I start to get totally obsessed.

fl0b0t · 26/03/2012 11:02

just peeking in. I'm loitering between ttc and wtttc....

6 months since my last depo injection, still no period/ signs of life down there. Had started to SWI then I had a tooth infection and now I've broken my shoulder so I'm unsex-able, waiting for a wisdom tooth extraction and feel like I'm back to square one Sad

HeavensNetIsWide · 22/03/2012 22:35

L that's very exciting, definite progress!

sparkles I'm 28 too, but desperately broody and just can't wait any longer! We're also in a 2bed, but it's a house which helps I think. An extra room would be ideal, but we would hope to move in a year or two, baby or not, so decided to just go for it.

I'm starting beginning of April! Having my coil out then just going for it although I am utterly in denial of the fact that know my cycle will be all over the place and it may take a while. As stated, am utterly desperate, so really don't care about birth month!

pinkbuttons · 22/03/2012 18:41

hi all,
just plodding along here with no mention of babies as Im starting to worry about scaring DH off.
How exciting about DH's change in mindset Lthe Wife! that has to be a good sign!
We were living in a 2 bed flat when DS was born and we still had a spare room for 6 months which was great, we were on the second floor though and it is a pain getting prams and car seats and shopping and baby up the stairs, but its do able especially if you have somewhere you can leave pram e.g in the car boot.

DS was due on 5th Jan and I ended up on delivery suite on New Years Eve with part of my waters going, was a nightmare so we will be being extra careful for the next month or so Christmas is far too expensive as it is!

mrsbugsywugsy · 22/03/2012 16:11

Ooh, I hadn't really thought about the consequences of having a Christmas baby. I just checked the 'due date calendar' and if we conceived in the coming month then apparently I'd be due on 27th December. Hmm, that could be bad....my OH doesn't drive, and I can just see myself in labour on new year's eve, trying to get a taxi!

sparkes I think if I was in your position I might wait, but then I was never interested in babies at all until I hit my 30's. I guess we're all different. There are practical reasons why we should wait too, but all of a sudden I have this overwhelming desire to do it right now.

LtheWife · 22/03/2012 13:20

I hope you manage to find a buyer soon sparkles. We're just getting our flat ready to put on the market and I have to admit I'm really worried we won't find a buyer. There are 3 identical flats currently on the market that have been on for a while now but I think they're over priced (another 3 have just sold very quickly but were priced very low). It's all a bit stressful isn't it?

So just wondering as we haven't had any stats for some time, who's leaving us next? I'm guessing most soon to be graduates might be waiting until the chance of December/January due dates has lessened before TTC?

sparkles281 · 21/03/2012 21:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LtheWife · 21/03/2012 13:22

Hi ladies, how's everyone doing?

Welcome sparkles, as mrsbugsy said I wouldn't let being in a 2 bed flat put you off too much. Don't forget that you'll have 9 months of pregnancy and 6 months of baby sleeping in your own bedroom, that gives you a minimum of 16 months before baby would need a room of their own! It might not be your ideal, but plenty of people manage it in 1 and 2 bed flats, babies really don't take up much space whilst they're small.

I think we're making progress as there has been a bit of a shift in DH's mindset recently. (TMI alert) he seems to have ditched the condoms and switched to the rather unreliable withdrawal method. It's very unlike him to be so relaxed about contraception so it's quite a surprise. He knows he's taking a risk and is always aware of where I am in my cycle (knows when my fertile period is etc) but there's no change in his new approach around ov. He also knows we would start TTC right away if the choice was mine alone. So I suspect the decision to start TTC is something that will just happen quite naturally when he's ready and without much discussion rather than on a set date. In the meantime it's kind of nice to not be actively preventing anymore, and who knows, there might even be a very happy accident along the way! Perhaps its time to get the folic acid in!

mrsbugsywugsy · 18/03/2012 20:18

hi sparkles

I also live in a 2 bedroom flat and don't really see it as a problem tbh. Perhaps I'm being naive. However I live in a city where property is expensive and I know people who've had a baby in a two or even one bedroom flat.

How many floors up is yours? I'm only on the first floor and we have a garden so maybe that makes a difference.

I guess it also depends on your age - I'm 33 and don't think we could afford to move somewhere bigger for a few years.

sparkles281 · 18/03/2012 17:44

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mrsbugsywugsy · 14/03/2012 22:30

hello,

first time poster here, but long time lurker.

I am studying part time (as well as a full time job) and the plan was to wait to TTC until I finish my course this autumn.

But I can't decide whether to TTC now (and risk still being studying while heavily pregnant), or wait till I finish the course. That's probably the sensible option but I will be 34 this summer and feel like time is no longer on my side, so now I'm starting to think we should just get started asap, in case we have any problems. Also, I have no patience at all and once I decide to do something I can't bear to wait.

I came off the pill a couple of months ago in preparation, and although not actively trying we are taking a fairly slapdash attitude to contraception. I guess part of me hopes we have an 'accident' so I don't have to decide.

LottieLouH · 12/03/2012 12:31

Good news Freckly, hope the next round of tests go well.

I'm pleased you mentioned your nerves around TTC Heaven I thought I was weird as the thought of not taking any precautions seems strange after so many years of being terrified of an accident. I think this may be one of the reasons I'm happy to wait to TTC until May. DH keeps asking why we can't just start now but I'm remaining strong on the timing (ideally waiting for a couple of milestones such as a holiday and savings).

LtheWife · 12/03/2012 12:10

I'm so pleased its good news freckly! It's awful at the time, but comforting to know they do keep such a close eye on things. I hope the last test comes back with a good result too.

HeavensNetIsWide · 12/03/2012 10:51

Oh freckly that is good news, sounds very anxiety inducing. I hope the other tests go ok.

Sounds like you're also having a tough time hermione. I don't have arthritis but know a few people with RA and they really struggle, hope things get settled for you soon.

I'm 28 tasmania and seriously feeling the clock ticking, although I know it's not really that old for TTC anymore. I'm also a planner and have been on here a while. We also ummed and ahhhed about things, but have come to the conclusion things will never be perfect, and you can ALWAYS say we'll have more money/be better able to cope etc etc next year, but have decided to just go for it, and enough will have to be enough.

So we are gearing up to start TTC at the beginning of April Grin I've booked to have my mirena removed but am now getting a little nervous of starting! It's silly, after all this waiting. But I've spent my whole life trying not to get pregnant, the thought of the first time DTD without contraception is bizarre Confused

Any other lurkers getting ready to start TTC anytime soon?

PineCones · 12/03/2012 10:25

Blush Eek sorry I completely messed that up
Typing ion the phone. I meant that's brilliant news freckly !!!

PineCones · 12/03/2012 10:24

freckly that's brilliant news!!

freckly12 · 12/03/2012 05:09

Hi Ladies,

Well good news- its not malignant! Thank god.

There are some v odd lesions on his liver but they arent malignant so thats really all we care about. So relieved, nearly threw myself on the doctor in sheer relief!

He has one more test to go but its nothing serious and the main thing is the cancer isnt back.
So much stress!

:(
THanks for all the wishes ladies,really appreciate it!
xxxxxx

Tasmania · 11/03/2012 21:58

I've joined Mumsnet only recently - well before we're even TTC. I'm an avid planner - i.e. I like knowing what I'm getting into before being in a certain situation. So was just planning to soak up the knowledge here.

I'm 33, and will be 34 at the end of the year. DH and I have been together for nearly a decade now, but it has never been quite the right time for having kids. With DH's extensive stay in higher education (PhD), and the recession that followed... and various other things that came in the way, the timing has been pushed further and further into the future. A while ago, we've also decided that we won't even try for a baby, unless we could offer that child a childhood that is either the same or better than the one we had. Anything less than that would be so completely unfair, we thought back then. Though now, we're starting to come to terms with the fact that our children (should we have any) will never have the same things we had anyway. Both of us had stay-at-home mums, because a few decades ago, one good job per household was enough to pay the mortgage, bills, holidays, etc. In my case, there's the extra issue that I grew up on the continent, where everything continues to be cheaper, and some of my high school mates are SAHM's now, without suffering much financially green-eyed monster. That is just so difficult to achieve in the UK (DH is British), and I find it difficult to cope with the fact that I will never be able to do that.

But I'm not getting any younger, and we decided, we will TTC by the end of next year by which time which time we'll have paid off most of the debt. So we're aiming for a 2014 baby, though by then, I will be 35, and if we're lucky enough to have a baby quickly, we may try for another one soon after, before the biological clock inside me closes that window of opportunity forever. Aaaargh!

Are there any more ladies here who for some reason had to postpone having children late into their 30s for whatever reasons?

PineCones · 11/03/2012 19:54

Freckly fingers crossed for you.

DichotoMous · 11/03/2012 16:48

Thinking of you freckly x

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