Waiting to try to conceive

Tiresome "so when are you two going to have a baby then?" from DP's visiting best friend yesterday (who has 2yo DD). DP said "We've already got one" and pointed at the dog and I just remained very uncharacteristically silent which will have seemed very noticeable to them.

Later that day, my best friend was visiting too with his wife and 9mo DD. DP's BF recounted the story of this earlier conversation to my BF, and kind of joked that I had gone quiet, I think he was hoping for a reaction from me to diffuse the situation, but I completely ignored him again. My BF appeared understandably uncomfortable, as he too is not privvy to where we stand on the situation. How can he be when I'm not even privvy to it?

Its irksome that these situations arise and I feel forced to behave almost rudely, when I think it is rude of people to make these kind of comments in the first place unless a prior conversation has taken place and they understand where you're at with it.

Nenehoo well, that would be fabulous but I still need to get DH on side!

How are you ladies doing tonight? I've been in to DH's excellent homebrew so I guess there are some things about not being pregnant that are really good !

Ooh and Ittybitty well done for getting a spreadsheet done - it's a nasty job (well for me anyway - I know some people like these activities?!) but worth it to know where you are.
And when you get that job it'll be a go!!! x

Please keep us updated Angelico I'm trying to rely on my eagle eyes and monthly aches and pains to chart my cycle but am so up for a bit of digital technology if I'm FORCED to...
weesooty I think it's great to have an alternative point of view on here! I do try to think about how my OH feels but it's hard sometimes. Especially when babies are EVERYWHERE. What's the advert with the hysterically giggling babies?! It should be banned!

Itty- well to be truthful, no. However I did some tests and they were neg. I'll do a test next week just to be sure.

Lw

25£?! I hope they do the job and make you breakfast for that price!

AmandaCooper I know how you feel about the insanity. I've been trying not to mn because I'm so wound up it's not doing me any good to read birth announcements, etc. Thank god for this thread!

Lw you must be on tenterhooks waiting for AF!

WeeSooty I'm glad you joined the thread! It's great to have your perspective because I think you and my DH are pretty much in the same headspace. It's nice to get a different perspective!

As for me, well ladies I'm feeling a bit down tonight because in my bid to get super organized and become Queen of Spreadsheets I realized it really isn't possible to have a baby just now. This is good to be aware of, but such a bummer.

On the plus side, I have applied for a new and better paying job. If I get that, things look much more possible this side of the decade. And I had a sneaky look at the maternity benefits on offer (counting chickens pre hatching? Me? Surely not!) and they are freakin fabulous!

Amonstercooper, no AF yet. Just lightly mentioned that AF has not turned up, and his words were " well there is nothing in the milk" [hsad] I'm hoping to talk to my DP about this. Any tips great fully received, [hgrin]

I did a tesco cheap test this morning and it was a bfn. [hsad]. Besides I'm taking the pill for five months. So I don't get winter baby. I know I should be greatful about having a child regardless of when it was born, but those months are the most expensive.

The clear blue test are about £25 pounds! Yep, that's right!

Lw

WeeSooty - I agree about price! For God's sake nobody buy the bloody thing in Boots - mine was an Amazon job and the sticks are miles cheaper there too!

Angelico Had never heard of the clearblue moniter looked it up on boots and nearly fell over at the price but looked it up on amazon and read the reviews wow! Good luck!! Thats an impressive little thing. I'm totally tempted by it lol

Budda girl congratulations! You must be bouncing off the walls.
Angelico hope everything goes to plan!

I hope the rest of you are fine.

Lw

weesooty it doesn't always skip a generation but it has up to now. i wouldn't mind twins at all but dh would freak! he's ok at the mo thanks but dreading the funeral he was really close with his gramps.

Okay I split post so it wouldn't be longest ever. Have recently bought ClearBlue Fertility Monitor and I promised I would give updates. Plan is to use it for 3 months to figure out cycle and then - BAM! Let the SWI with intent begin!

So got AF on 12th Oct and finally got the little 'egg' symbol this morning meaning I should ovulate in next 24-36 hours. Interesting because that would mean I ovulate around day 15-17 in a regular 28 day cycle so later than I thought. I read similar in Amazon reviews - a lot of people assume they will ovulate around day 12-14 so that might be useful to know.

Any questions ask away. Of course the real test will be when we use it with intent...

ViviPru ? I totally hear you. Forty would seem like the perfect age to have a baby if possible (mostly because it would give me another five years of freedom, woo ha ha haaaaaa!) but it just seems a risk. A really good friend of mine has been trying for over a year and she?s only a year older than me :( Also LOADS of girls in work have had bother, even though they are in their twenties or early thirties! You just don?t know if you?re going to be lucky or not.

Nenehooo ? I didn?t even think about all that stuff. I think I just magically assume money will appear from somewhere and I can just scamper about going to Pilates or making clay models of my own (gigantic post-partum) breasts or something! I always forget that maternity pay actually meets sweet FA money in your pocket! :(

Buddhagirl - I wouldn't get too stressed about the EWCM. There's that PreSeed stuff that you can buy that's supposed to mimic it. Anyone tried it?

Some news!
AF was surposed arrive on Monday, its now Thursday! Did a test in the afternoon and it was a bfn. I got one test left and I'm waiting till the morning.
Fingers crossed.
Lw

Hi everyone,

Well good news from me today, was at the shopping centre and saw a tiny wee baby in a majorly cute outfit and?. I felt broody! Woooo! Lol Not much but a twinge so that?s a start.

Its very weird for me on this thread, I guess I get a bit of perspective on how my DH must feel wanting a baby but I also understand very easily how all of your partners must feel on the issue!

Apologies in advance cause I?m really crap with words tonight, its been a long day? As I said before my husband has been desperate for a baby since we got married, its not that he nagged me it was just that he would mention babies all the time! He?s very into cars so would eye up little fancy baby car seats or he?d talk about what our baby would be like, it totally freaked me out! One day I snapped and had a massive go at him and told him how pressured it all made me feel! He listened and since then he has been very quiet on the baby issue. Reverse psychology maybe but since he?s been quiet I?ve been thinking about it more and more and have decided that it could be alright if we had a baby, we have room in our flat, I?ve looked at finances and it?d be tight but manageable? It is a possibility.

Anyway, what I?m blethering on about is? Maybe if you keep quiet and let your partners think bout babies they will want a baby quicker? I don?t wanna offend anyone and maybe my theory only works with me cause my broodiness kicked in, I don?t know if men really get broody! Ooh I hope Im making sense!!

Right enough about me!

Redrhumba Sorry about your DH?s granddad, he must be upset. Hope your cold is better, do twins not skip a generation or is that a myth??

Buddahgirl congrats that?s great you got it in your first month. I came off the pill in April and I think my cycle has finally settled down, didn?t realise how long it would take, I spend all month analysing symptoms and mood swings!

Hope everyone else is ok (and not offended by me) I will keep lurking, running away and sneaking back!!

Thank-you for my mucus congratulations, he he. Yup this is 1st month off the patch. WHY did i decide I have never really had ewcm when ive been on contraception LITERALLY ALWAYS >:/ Sometimes I annoy myself.

Had the TTC conversation with DP again yesterday. Basically he is being the sensible one and said when we have a house and stable income and are married then we should try. Sounds sensible to me. However i've never been a good one with waiting .

Hope everyone is rattling along fine x

Excellent news Buddhagirl - congrats! Is this your first cycle off the pill? I was similarly excited when I got EWCM for the first time after coming off the pill. Still don't get a lot of it though so am hoping it will gradually increase as time goes on.

Amonstercooper I think your DH is probably better at anticipating the effect that a LO will have on his working at home than mine is, and I'm taking full advantage and hoping it stays that way. Obviously having a baby is going to massively change our lives anyway, and my working patterns as much as his but it will totally be worth it so don't want to encourage him to have cold feet again!

I don't think I would have the nerve to buy anything before actually conceiving, although I'm sure I wouldn't be able to resist once I was.

EWCM! i have it! Yes! Literally all my fertility worries have gone. Yes :D:D aw happy days!

Didnt take it back, brought it online. At the time I justified it as 'its spreading the cost' LOL. Mental.

Ha Angelico or should that be 'twinny'! Summer borns are clearly the most fun and life and soul of the classroom!!!
I've been beavering away at a budget plan for my finance obsessed hubby. Apparently nappies/baby toiletries/food etc comes to little over £100 a month. Very hard to work out as all advice is to buy stuff when it's on offer. Childcare is the bugger though. When I go back to work it'll be at the very least £550 a month. Ouch.
Told hubby and he looked at our budget planner, which says we have more than this left over each month after all bills etc. (We don't at the moment, but I didn't remind him of this, I will just spend less in the future) So he said "I guess we can afford a baby then." With no hint of the joy/happiness he was feeling inside. But hey, the budget planner is all powerful, so case closed. RESULT!
Still having the old "we're gonna have no life" conversations every now and then. I just keep reminding him that the longer we wait the harder it gets, and we'll REALLY have no money if we have to pay for IVF to have one... again, he has no alternative but to agree with this. I'm feeling incredibly smug clever right now!
I have no idea what colour I want - pink or blue will do!!!

Hello - after a few weeks of lurking, I can resist no longer and am joining you! I am chomping at the bit TTC #2. DD is 14 months and I came back to work 4 days a week 2 months ago. I need to have a year between maternity leaves to get the company's package so we can start TTC end Nov. Taking folic acid and have about 5 weeks of pill left to take then away we go! Very impatient, I am sure you can distract me in the meantime....

hi all, i've been a bit awol but had a rubbish couple of weeks.

started other weekend when dh told me that he wasn't sure that he wanted another dc full stop so i went into emotional meltdown!! i then spent that week coming to terms with ds being an only child which i was kinda fine with but i couldn't come to terms with me not ever being pregnant again!!

anyway dh grandad had been poorly and died yesterday so i haven't said anything else about it but last night he said he'd not completely written off the idea of having another but he is worried about having twins (huge in my side of the family - and he couldn't cope with 3) and also worried about health of another baby now we're getting older (which i think is only natural) so i'm letting him come round on his own now.

he did mention after christmas but i'm not getting my hopes up cos as every month passes i end up upset.

i also have a horrendous cold and feel like i could spend the day in bed but ds has other ideas!

anyway hope to catch up with you all soon x