Waiting to try to conceive

MrsTwinks - I was on marvelon for about 3 years but have been on other types of pill over the past 13 years. Hopefully after my first "real" AF it will start to settle down.

Tough decision Angelico. There really is never a good time to TTC, there is always a reason not to. However when you're ready, you're ready, so i would be tempted to just go for it over Xmas, but then i'm really impatient.

Angelico returns! Hello again ladies! How is everything??? AF is here at present. I reckon one more after this and then we'll start trying. Have slight dilemma:

Based on ClearBlue OV prediction I'll be ovulating on Dec 23rd. On upside will have finished work, be suitably chilled. On downside I want a few beverages over Xmas and will be travelling to family and DH's family who will all have non-drinking radars on.

If I wait till Jan and get pregnant straightaway DHC (darling hypothetical child) won't be born till late Sep / Oct which loses precious month of maternity leave. Also January is utter hell in work so body will be awash with stress hormones. On other hand Xmas will be out of the way and probably have been an awesome bender.

Hmmmmmm, decisions decisions! x

thanks, made me feel a bit better. pinsent my first cycle after coming off the pill was very long, about 45 days, before settling back into 29 so maybe the same with you. What pill were you on?

Evening ladies. It's FRIDAY, hooray! Hope you have all had a lovely week.

Welcome to MN Mrsb23! I am so glad i am not the only one who has had extreme reactions to family pregnancies. MN has now become my saviour as it has given me a place to vent with ladies who understand how i feel, i hope it will work as a haven for you too.

Twinks - I totally agree with what mrsb23 wrote. I am sure you will be an amazing mother. We all learn from our past and it sounds to me like you have learnt a lot of lessons about what not to do, which will make you a brilliant mum. Plus you shouldn't feel like you have no-one else to talk to as you have all of us lot here.

Nenehooo - it is really exciting thinking that we could have an accident. Just don't tell my DH!

Right i have a bit of a question. I took my last pill on Friday 21st Oct, then started my AF on Fri 28th so i have counted this as CD1. In an attempt to start understanding my cycle i began using OPK's on Sunday (CD10) and so far i have had all negative results (now on CD15). I know it is going to take a while for my cycle to get back to normal but thought i may have ovulated by now. Anyone else got any experience with this?

mrstwinks i cant offer any personal knowledge on your post but my mum had a similar childhood, her mum was truly awful in many ways, and my mum was an amazing mother. She told me that she was so concious of her childhood when raising us she was never going to make the same mistakes and she is an amazing and very natural mother who i have the best relationship with. Im sure you wont crack and will be equally amazing as a mother - baby twinks will be lucky to have you

Oops - totally cant work this bold writing thing! I meant pinsent not #pinsent!

Hi everyone, I am super new to mn (as in today new) but have been reading this and had to get involved! Especially having read your posts #pinsent - i am (very!) newly married but my husband is someone ive known since I was a teenager - and recently i have had super mega uber what you guys seem to call babycrack! ( i have no idea what all the acronyms etc mean so please bear with me!) it was always the 'plan' that DH and I would TTC in the year after our wedding. (ie this year coming). My mum is DESPERATE for a grandchild and weve spentyears plotting all the fun we will have when i get pg (although she doesnt know DH and I's timeline). Anyway this year my little brother who is 23 (i am 26) has got his first ever gf pg. Although my family are all devastated (he has no job, theyve been together only since jan, she is only 20, both are v v immature) my overriding (and v selfish) reaction was utter devastation. My baby wont be my mums first grandchild anymore which is super selfish but i literlly cried for days. So #pinsent what you said totally struck a cord. Anyway, this isnt meant to be a depressing post cos im sort of over that all now and focusing on DH and I's quest for a mini-B! We have just bought a 2 bed flat which will be built in feb so although DH desnt like 'putting dates on things' im pretty sure feb will be TTC o clock! Im already off the pill ( i think i had been on it far too long) but have mega baby fever!

Re earlier points on babysniffing - i sooooo get that.

Had a bit of drama yesterday and feeling a bit shakey now.

Theres a whole tread in AIBU about part of it but also found out she did proper hard core drugs while pg with me. Totally killed any trust in her, and on top of other stuff I'm not sure I want her near me right now. But.. I have no one but her to talk to about babies and stuff. None of our friends have kids yet and MIL is so opinionated I couldn't count on her. To give you an idea, I made comment once about not liking the idea of epidurals for me as family history of back problems, and she took it as a personal attack on her choice to have one (and its not my delivery, she does similar to everyone)

Someone tell me I'm being completely unreasonable to contemplate not starting as planned because I will be terrible and I will crack and completely cock it all up and ruin my child. We were both getting excited about last christmas just the two of us (or at least last drunken one) and now I'm freaking that its a completely stupid idea.

haha goodluck pinsent ... i will have my finger and toes crossed for you. I have been ready for a year to start a family, but things were not going so well at work and started new work last month and every where I look there are just bumps and babies! I have never felt like this before and just have this crazy urge to start a family now. But financially we are going to have to wait for another 6 months till a decent maternity package is available through work...hence the decision to wait :(

Hi I am new to MN and have been lurking for a few months.
First post on the ttc waiting list :)
Have come off the pill, but started new job last month, so have sensibly decided to wait till Easter next year! Frustrating and can't stop thinking about it... DH very supportive and also wants to wait till the time is right! Arrgh...roll on 2012. Also turning 30 next year.. scary stuff... but excited.

Awww that's so exciting pinsent! I mentioned to DH that I'm planning on coming off contraception after my period in Dec (have to keep giving him little bits of this kind of info s as to not to scare him into changing his mind - if he knew where my brain was half the time he'd be terrified!) and we both got a fit of the giggles! Just too exciting/scary!!! I'm worried we won't actually be able to get down to business come Jan as we'll be finding it too funny

Evening ladies. How's everyone feeling? I have now cheered up after my rant the other day. After a big long chat with DH we have decided that I am going to stay off the pill & start charting so that when we start trying I know what's happening with my body. However I told DH that if he wants us not to TTC then it's up to him to be in charge of contraception. Well last night we got down to business, DH started sensibly with a condom but hated the feeling so took it off & decided to try the withdrawal method, however he got a little carried away & didn't quite pull out in time (TMI) . Although I only probably got half of his swimmers, a few more accidents like that & who knows what might happen (keeping fingers crossed)!
Apologies for the overshare of intimate info but was just so excited that I had to tell someone & knew you lovely ladies would understand. X

Hi chanting, LadyBourne, VeniVidi and all other teachers on here!
I'm also worrying about starting to TTC with regards to work - I work in a very small school so teachers going on maternity has a massive effect on everything - and there's been a spate of pregnancies recently. I absolutely love my school and really don't want to let my head down by getting up the duff and being off for 10 months... also wonder if I'll be as good a teacher if I have babies - I certainly won't be at school for 11 hours of my day anyway
Life is hard when you're a grown up!!!

Hi Chanting, welcome back to the thread! I remember you from before. Did your DH stop smoking yet?

It doesn't surprise me that so many teachers are on here, there is a real tendency to put work and the kids before everything else, I know that it is one of the reasons I waited so long. Oddly enough, I was thinking about this the other day when I realised I was starting to feel guilty for taking time off to look after DH.

Hello, used to visit more frequently but then drifted away. I'm also another teacher!
We are waiting for a couple of months, not strictly because of DH - he is super keen on the idea, however he had to have a rather delicate operation so we have to wait for him to heal.
Age-wise, I am 39 years old, so I know that we can't wait too long.

Feeling your pain Fanjo and sending lots of your hugs your way. There is currently 11 pregnant women at my work at the moment plus I have 2 pregnant sister-in-laws, who are both younger than me. I'm only 28 but I always thought I'd be the next one in the family to get pregnant. So to all those women out there waiting to TTC I am sending hugs & happieness out to you all.
Xx

pinsent that sounds really difficult, I sympathise with you, especially as it's standing in the way of you TTC :(

Itty I'm 25 and my masterplan is to finish breeding by 30 (though I know you can't exatly plan this kind of thing in any meaningful way!)

As far as being a bridesmaid goes I wouldn't let it get in your way, if she goes bridezilla on you then ignore her. Though I do think pinsent is being reasonable by planning to mention before dresses are purchased - you may even be able to get a dress which could work with a bump in the colour/fabric she chooses. Seriously though, being a bridesmaid is important, bu nowhere near as important enough to alter your own lifeplans for IMHO.

Fanjo, I completely know where you are coming from. My DH and I decided to wait 18 months before TTC because it was the sensible thing to do financially. It made sense but so many times along the way we've wavered, thinking, would it really be so terrible if we started now..... It can get so hard - the heart says one thing and the head another!!

Help. I'm surrounded! By people who have just given birth, people who are announcing their pregnancies, people who are waddling around with huge bumps.

I need to talk to people who are not having babies. We want one, but our sensible heads say wait. Waiting, waiting, always waiting.

I'm going to be having a very LARGE glass of wine tonight while I cry.

Itty I turned 32 last month. Like AC my masterplan was to pop out 2 by 35, which I think I can only manage now if I breed like a farm animal.

I'm having exactly the same dilemma
Ladybourne. I am bridesmaid in july & the bride has asked if I am planning babies soon, but as I don't want anyone to know I'm considering TTC I said no. I figure that you can't put your life on hold just to be bridesmaid. I'm at the age when all my friends are getting married, so if I put it on hold for every wedding I am bridesmaid for then I could be waiting a while. I think I will make a firm decision before she buys our dresses, as they can be quite pricey & I don't want her to waste her money. Totally understand your dilemma though, it's not nice feeling like you have let your friends down but they will understand & be happy for you if you are pregnant.

pinsent - such a frustrating time for you. However, a holiday in Thailand sounds like the perfect time to start! Let's hope things have worked out for by then.

Itty I'm 29 but turning 30 in January, which is when I'd like to start trying. No way is 31 too late, whenever you want a baby is the perfect time.

By the way ladies, I am bridesmaid twice next year (April for friend and June for sister) do you think I should wait until after then? I'm pretty sure they'd both be cool about it but don't want to cause any stress!

itty- im 27. i know how you feel about the work.
This nvq will allow me to to do laods more work for the same amount of money. however found out that the pension people want to double the amount i want to pay in and get less out! .

so what little money im saving, will go. i just hope that do not go into my savings.

lw

Ittybittysmum I turned 34 yesterday. I had really hoped to complete my family by my 35th birthday. Now looks like at best I'll be pg with DC1.