Waiting to try to conceive

Hey everyone

I?m in a glum mood today? My mum was going on and on about my wee cousin?s new baby tonight and how wonderful the baby will be and how she has found all these lovely outfits for the baby. I don?t know whether to cry or scream! I know I have been saying I?m not broody but deep down I really am, I?m just worried about money and having to go back to work and generally how I will manage to be a good mum. Meanwhile my cousin who is eating crap, taking no vitamins and had to have an iron jag cause she refuses to take her iron tablets is getting a baby, the council will give her a house and money and my own mum is buying her baby clothes! Argh!!

Do I sound horrible and selfish?!?! I think I have just realised I do want a baby so so much but I want it all to be right and I want my mum to be buying me the baby stuff!

Someone please slap some sense into me????

Sigh? Moving on?

PeggyPatch Major well done on loosing weight!!!!! 3 stone is fab!!!

As for prouduct info?

I?m on the prenagcare conception pills, as is my husband, tho I have to remind him to take his as he would rather be on the sportsman pills!

We use the featherlight condoms as well. I must be the only woman who likes condoms!! They take away all the mess! Mind you I guess when TTC I will have my legs in the air trying to keep the mess in! Too much info?!?!

Whats the grapefruit juice all about??

Also I have a weird question? I? ve heard people saying you shouldn?t get your hair dyed in pregnancy, is this true? If we are ttc next month can I get my highlights done at the end of this month??

Woah woah woah... what's all this Evening Primrose business?! I take it every day (plus starflower oil, zinc & folic acid) for acne/irregular cycles. Had NO idea it could be bad for TTC!
Have now ordered Take Charge of Your Fertility from Amazon, and will change my pill-popping habits from now, and drink tonnes of Grapefruit juice from around Jan 10th
Thanks ladies!

Thanks for the wine Pinsent My DH has that babycrack sympton- I've caught him planning how the study will be...

Exciting news Zara! You must be so pleased! We've always used condoms- I would recommend Durex Mint Tingle, though tbh recently with all the thoughts of TTC I've been getting so annoyed at using them!

Redstrawberry - I just been taking the pregnacare conception ones- they were on offer in Boots and had extra stuff about aiding conception! I've read others alternating the pregnacare and folic acid.

Awayinamanger (love the name!) - v frustrating re the holiday- is there anything particular why he may be dithering- is he worried about redundancy or anything? Are you planning to go somewhere superexciting?

Booked driving lessons today to have one a week on saturday! So excited! This weekend we're going to see our God-daughter all weekend- she's just over one so it should be a fun filled, and eye opening weekend!

redstrawberry I take folic acid, iron, zinc and omega 3-6-9 based on all the old wives tales I've read on here. Also a vegi, so the iron's for that. The omega and zinc are to boost fertility and regulate my cycle. No idea if any of it works, but I have gone to a regular 31 day cycle with OV around CD 15, so I'll stick with it!

Looking at nursery furniture is way naughtier than buying babygros I reckon! You win the babycrack cup!

Zara it sounds like you're all set to go! I don't blame you on the preseed as you can rest assured that just on the one time you are planning to TTC you will mysteriously dry up just as all the chemists are shut and have to pour a whipped egg white up there....

DH is dithering again over booking holiday. Last time he just didn't take any holiday at all because he "thought it would look bad". This time he won't call his boss specifically to ask for holiday (next May) because it might look like he is "desperate". Madness! And so very frustrating.

redstrawberry I'm using the Fertility Friend app as I am also temping so I can add temps in and see chart. Layout/interface is not as nice as Period Tracker but I figured I wanted it all centrally located as I am using Fertility Friend.

My extent of babycrack obsession is getting so bad that Amazon is helpfully sending me info about various baby products on a daily basis (based on what I've already been searching) and all the online advertising I see now is baby-related (thanks Google - glad MIL couldn't work that one out when she was using my computer when staying with us recently...). :S Clear your history ladies or you'll get outed!!!!

This is prenatal vit I am taking (includes iron too) as well as Boots brand Omega 3 fish oil capsules and evening primrose oil (but will stop taking that as soon as TTC, because I understand from reading other threads it can interfere with your ovulation?)

Awayinamanger arrrrghhhh I should've remembered the Persona monitor, you've mentioned it before! By the time I saw your post I'd already given my money to Mr Amazon for a CBFM, 20 sticks and some pre-seed (am I over-prepared or what?). Can't wait till AF comes (bet that's the last time you'll hear me say that) so I can start using CBFM!

Yep agree with VeniVidiVino - the Durex Featherlight ones are quite nice. Since coming off the pill, I have been tracking my cycle on the Period Tracker app. Anyone else use any other apps? I find Period Tracker quite good and the graphics are very pretty too. The first month after coming off the pill was pretty awful with a 49 day cycle and after 6 months got closer to 32 day cycles. Have been going Zumba to get healthy and fit.

On the babycrack thing - I can't stop having a sneaky peek at Mamas and Papas to see what new stuff they have... nursery interiors...ahhh! I know I shouldn't - counting chickens and all that bad luck stuff... but I can't seem to resist the temptation.

Hello ladybourne and mrspeggypatch - do you take both folic acid and pregnacare together or is it one of the two? I have been researching the whole mutlivitamin intake thing and not sure whether to take both or just the one? Will probably start from next year. Also I am vegetarian so might need to take some iron ones too.

We're using the Persona monitor. It has a failure rate of around 6% but so long as you're happy with that, it's a good option. You can pick them up on eBay.

Zara that's great news, congratulations! Also can report much more 'horniness' since coming off the pill, very frustrating what with having to use condoms for the next few weeks - we are using durex featherlight (red packet) and they're pretty good, though not compared to the real thing

We've gone for the withdrawal method rather than condoms, not as reliable but then that's a good thing IMO . X

Thanks nenehooo and pinsent!!! :D Yes quite exciting as we're moving TTC ahead 4 months from April next year! DH is fully on-board - can't believe we're finally on the same page on this!

Pinsent I have also had ovulation at around 20 day mark since coming off the pill. I am feeling like my cycle is longer than normal but then again I never paid so much attention to it before the babycrack hit, so who knows! Also errrr can confirm increased horniness here too since coming off the pill....!

Those who are off the pill and using condoms - what brand are you using? Got some Boots brand ones and they are bloody rubbish (difficult to get on) and it's annoying. This condom malarkey is so annoying, and the no-pants dance is less enjoyable IMO.

Congrats Zara!!! Getting the OH on board is a BIG step - keep expecting mine to change his mind again - just keep reminding him that we'll be having LOTS of early nights when the time comes, this seems to be doing the trick!

Forgot to say, exciting news Zara! Plus a trip to Oz, happy times!

Thanks for all the advice & personal accounts re ovulation days when coming off the pill, it's reassuring to know that it is not just my body being funny. I'm on CD17 now & am still using my OVKs but no sign of a line yet. I bought some cheapy sticks so I'm just going to keep doing them each day until I get that line, then I just have to keep my fingers crossed that DH forgets agrees to not using any contraception!

ladybourne- I came off the pill to start getting used to my normal cycles and I'm glad I did as it seems like they might take a while to settle into a regular pattern. Plus I don't know if it's in my head but since I have been off the pill I have been much hornier!

Welcome peggypatch! (hands over cup of tea , actually make that wine while we can) My babycrack is designing our future babies room in my head, even to the point where I have looked up baby furniture online!

Hello everyone - WOW I haven't posted in ages but it's just got so busy!! Lovely to see all of you - and it seems all of our experiences/sentiments have the same theme....!!

Anyway, I have a big and EXCITING update on my front - after further discussion by DH and I - we're moving up starting TTC to JANUARY! EEEEK! I literally just got off the phone cancelling the flights for our big trip in March to South Africa & Mozambique (full refund) - we decided to cancel because we'd be visiting high-risk malaria areas at the worst time of year for (and because we both care about TTC WAY more than an expensive holiday now). Also DSIL is having a rough time in her life right now and we will maybe visit her instead next year (she lives in Melbourne) - Oz is definitely more a preggo-friendly destination (aside from the flight).

So!!! Very excited!! Going to find a CBFM on eBay or Amazon and start POAS in preparation!!

Waiting has had its benefits, we have discussed lots of potentially tricky issues. Would I go back to work, how much child care costs (that was truly scary) and we have practiced by babysitting our nephew.
There will never be a perfect time, unless of course my lotto numbers come up! So bring on Jan!

Hello,

Mind if I join you all?

Another newbie here- first ever mumsnet post.

I'm in my late 20s, married 3 years. DH and I decided about a year ago that we'd start ttc this December (will be mid-December I think cycle-wise)- aiming for a post August baby.

I've lost 3 stone since May (still overweight but still losing...), started on the folic acid/pregnacare at the beginning of Nov, and bought a conception/pregancy book- this is the final step to convince myself its actually real!

I've been so excited for ages and its so hard to keep a secret, so I thought now was probably the time to join you all! I'm sure I've given away my baby interest obsession in RL loads - with pregnant colleagues it seems like I know more than then sometimes - luckily I have a little god-daughter I can use as an excuse for knowing this stuff!

The latest sympton of babycrack for me is checking out pushchairs on the Hight St deciding which one would suit us the most...ermm...

Angelico I have been having the same thoughts re drinking at Christmas but have come to the conclusion that I will be driving on Christmas day so will only have to think of an excuse for Christmas eve at my dad's. I'm thinking the good old fashioned antibiotics excuse might have to suffice, even though I may get a few suspicious looks...

weesooty im glad there are people on here who can sympathise - knowing it is selfish doesnt stop it feeling so crap! We too have worried about money esp as i earn more than DH so me being on mat will be a strain for us. Also we have bought a 2 bed flat so our mortgage will be small when we are on reduced income and i worry about the space - then my bro and his gf just jump straight in with no worries as someone else will sort it for them! Grr!

Anyone else earn rather more than DH and worried how it will work?

Glad I'm not the only teacher geek Chanting! Thing that made me think was the recent spate of cancer scares in my & OH's family. Both our parents had us in their 30s and I couldn't bear it if my children didn't get to know their grandparents. Sometimes a good dose of perspective is needed...
Angelico I'm starting to think we were seperated at birth - I have the exact same time frames as you! Am coming off contarception around mid Dec, so technically it's all go from then on... eeek! BUT have been invited to a wedding abroad at beginning of August so was thinking of starting to try Jan.
Would quite like an Oct/Nov baby as lots of my favourite people have bdays around then, but what do you mean about losing a month's maternity?! Hadn't thought about maximising mat time, it's sure to confuse me

Wow its been busy in here!

Hi everyone!!!

Strange having all these teachers on the thread! My mum is a teacher and she too has the masisve guilt thing if she ever needed to take time off.

PINSENT I came off the pill in April and my first cycle was a whopping 50 days long! I had been on the pill for 9 years, thankfully they now seem to be settling into a 30 day pattern so I?m happier with that. I think it just takes time for the pill to leave your system.

MRSB23 You?ve pulled me out of lurking to sympathise. My family is very close and my little cousin, 19, no job, no education, no house (they sleep on friends floors) has gotten pregnant by her boyfriend. They?ve been together about 4 months, he?s 23 and already has a one year old with someone else. Neither work or plan to work and instead of being happy that she?s pregnant all I can think is selfish thoughts!! My husband and I worry about how we will afford a baby, how rubbish it will be when I have to go back to work and are taking vitamins, getting exercise and just generally preparing for a baby and she has without thought to anything chosen to get pregnant, despite knowing that my family carries a genetic disorder that puts the baby at great risk. I just wanted my baby to be the first in the family. And now I feel I can?t get pregnant as I may look like I?m copying her and also I don?t want my baby to have to share the limelight! God I sound like such a cow.

I am slowly getting over my feelings, or at least learning to shove them to one side and we have decided to start trying for a baby next month. I am utterly terrified but exciting at the same time!

Anyway, sorry for big long rant, hope you are all having a good weekend!

Hi all, sorry it has been so long since I posted

AF has just been for the 2nd time so only one more to go before we can TTC. Cycle seems a bit all over the place as it was 35 days between. Who knows when the next one will pitch up though. Thinking of waiting a bit longer before TTC as really enjoying my time with just DD. Oh I don't know!

Anyway, hope you're all well and that the months between now and TTC are quick!

Chanting I did exactly the same thing with TCOYF! Can't believe we don't actually teach girls the biology they really ought to know, in school. Happy reading LadyBourne. :)

Pinsent I've had ovulations around CD17-20 since coming off the pill 5 months ago. Possibly partly delayed by stress at work but I think also just things settling down.

Angelico I am having a similar dilemma but think my cycle is going to be long this time as I seem to have ov'd as late as CD20 which might push ovulation slightly beyond Christmas. (This is assuming I don't decide to keep waiting for the sake of next year's year 12s and/or seeing my form through year 11 - have to keep reminding myself what a sad thing to say that is.) Also, lots of people do get updiffed while drunk and no lasting harm done to the baby, so maybe you could compromise and drink in moderation while still TTC?? Is that a shocking thing to say on here?

Pinsent for ages after coming off the pill I OV on CD20, so it could still be on the cards. However those OPK sticks are notorious for missing the surge, which is really brief. You may need to test more frequently.

Hooray for the weekend! Amanda - no such luck on the smoking front, but on the plus side, he has been so ill since his op that he has cut down a lot. He has lost more weight though, although without trying, so that makes it just over 10 stone.

nenehoo that is exactly what I mean, there aren't many jobs where the convenience for your work place is more important than your own life choices. One thing that really made me think was the fact that although I am happy waiting, at least a little longer, it never occurred to me that if there were 'issues' that I would be too old to be considered for treatment on the NHS. As it is, I was too old 4 years ago!

This site, and especially this thread, is great. I have learnt so much about the whole TTC process, it has made me feel much more confident that i can cope with whatever happens. LadyBourne - one of the first things i did when I started reading this site was to buy a couple of fertility books, I read the whole of TCOYF the day it arrived (god I felt a moron at what I didn't know). Happy reading!

Good evening everyone,

Thank goodness it's Friday.

Hello to Mrsb23 and redstrawberry.

pinsent I'm so glad you've had a chat with DH, and are making positive plans, how very exciting.

I have had a fertility book arrive from Amazon today so that's my reading for the weekend as still trying to get my head around ovulations! Been on the pill for 15 years and tempted to come off now to get body back to normal for the new year. My whole situation depends on an operation I'm due to have in a couple of weeks (suspected endometriosis) so swotting up until I know have a verdict from the hospital. If I have it, then I'm going to ttc in Jan, if not, then will wait till spring then not such a problem with weddings!

Have a lovely weekend all x

Angelico - completely agree with pinsent, never a right time, best just to go for it :)