Waiting to try to conceive

Now I've found this thread, thought I'd better join in!

Husband and I can't decide whether we're ttc ot ntntc (not trying not to conceive!). We were waiting originally because of my job's funding and a bunch of other things but realised we can "afford" this if we're frugal and sensible, job or no job. Plus I now know that I can apply for internal jobs if they come up whether pregnant, on maternity leave or whatever! Husband recently got broody, and although it's been at the back of our minds for a while, we never really discussed it that much (we have busy active lives,!!).

So my last depo provera injection was 13 weeks ago, and I'm not having another one.... trying to decide whether to wait until I have a proper period before we start ttc, or just go for it.....Not looking forwards to a period though, 18 months without has been bliss!

I know practically nothing about my cycle, been on the pill since 2001, and then depo for the last 18months....?!

Rikalaily- sounds like despite the depo you're hoping fertility to return quite quickly?!

MrsPeggyPatch I left it ages and ages to have a smear, too- they hurt but I guess they're better than the alternative; like other people have said,the results should be back well before you'd be TTC.

AF here too today! perhaps we are syncing over the interwebz.

redstrawberry must remember the deodorant tip for my next smear, although I use roll on so may not be such a good plan ;-)

Last smear I had the speculum wouldn't come out! The nurse told me I had exceptionally strong pelvic floor muscles... interesting...

Also MrsPeggyPatch - last time I got my results back in about 5 days, it is all computerised and done centrally in our Trust, so the results come directly back from the lab rather than going via the GP. SO hopefully you won't have to wait too long for the results. But I would ask the nurse after the smear and see what she says.

As today's day 1 of the cycle before we start TTC I started taking conception vitamins instead of my usual multivitamins. Really hate paying twice as much for them since they actually have LESS vitamin in than my usual ones!! what a con!

peggypatch best to go for the test even though its a grim experience. I had mine done a few years ago, but i remember it all too well.

Lying on the table legs wide open, a chatty nurse poking around with something cold up my lady bits while I tried to pretend I was not there and imagined I was in Paris taking a stroll through the streets... Hard though as the practice nurse kept describing how pink I was down there ....errrmmm think Paris! think Paris!!!

Oh and I tidied up my lady garden and probably just something i do - sprayed on some deo on undergarments before putting them on :)

Would you be able to discuss ttc with the practice nurse? Who can maybe offer some advice? But please do go for it, best not to put these things off.

LITERALLY laughing out loud Angelico We SO are twins, as I'm also devastatingly funny
Wiil have a good go at TCOYF - can try to translate it into child speak if you like so it goes in easier?!
MrsPP I say go for it! Only cos I can't wait personally...
Thanks for answering my questions lovely ladies! If only you could answer all my questions. Like why does my grill burn everything, even when it's on the lowest setting and the tray is as far away from it as it can get?

Angelico at the preseed ideas. I'd not heard of it before, now I'm quite curious.

Awayinamangercopper any luck in pinning DH down to book leave?

So, I've got myself in a pickle tonight. I've got my first ever smear test tomorrow morning (yes I know, its terrible i've not had one before, but I finally got my bum into gear...).

I'm worried not only about the state of my lady garden but also about dates and timings. If I'm calculating right I'll be most fertile around the second week of December and the plan was to try around then (though this does mean I'll probably get a very disappointing christmas eve visit of AF). Though I think it would be unlikely that I would have the results of my smear then...

So, in my head it is unlikely that I will be lucky our first month of trying and it is also unlikely that anything bad comes back on the smear, however suppose I were to be pregnant and then need further tests...Should I leave it another month and wait for the results :( , or should we go full steam ahead?

Awayinamangercooper

Hi all. I'm on the depo atm, it runs out around Christmas day then we are going to ttc from Jan. Hoping that the 2 depo's I've had won't delay my cycle normalising. Was thinking about getting some ovulation tests for Jan to see if my ovulation kicks back in, have never used them before.

This will be baby no.5 for me and no.2 for my dp, atm we have ds (9) dd1 (6) dd2 (4, turns 5 in Dec) and dd3 (18 months). My lad will be gutted if I have another girl, he literally sobbed his heart out when we told him we were expecting dd3, he's so desperate for a brother, lol. I'll probably be just like my mum and have 1 boy and 4 girls though hehe.

I gave up smoking 7 weeks ago, rarely drink so no more naughty habits to kick, can't take folic acid but hoping to lose a little weight when the depo wears off as I've put some on with it, hopefully it will come off fast. I have to go to my GP to discuss my meds, I'm on 4 atm which I'll probably have to stop when ttc/pregnant so will probably be fairly uncomfortable when I stop them.

Nenehoo a 24 day cycle with OV on CD11 or 11 would be fine, as long as you have a luteal phase of 11 or more days you should be fine - and you'll have more frequent opportunities to TTC.

Angelico grapefruit juice is supposed to be good for producing more EWCM, but it never did anything for me, despite drinking boxes of the stuff. I think you have to introduce these things and stick with them for a few cycles to see any difference though. It doesn't taste that bad!

Angelico that's mad and you know it! It's not rocket fuel, it mimics your natural juices, that's all!

Zara1984 I was exactly the same about starting using CBFM last month lol. I used to sing my DH a song every morning - the words are "I'm going to pee on a stick, to pee on a stick, to pee on a stick!" I mostly sing it to the Chicken Tonight advert tune

I also got the Pre-Seed but then gave myself whole new worries. Consider the following: imagine DH produces a million sperm. They're all swimming away when suddenly one of them gets a Pre-Seed rocket boost and accelerates out in front. It's the winner! Only it turns out 9 months later that it was a dodgy sperm and produces the baby equivalent of Binky the 3 eyed fish from the Simpsons. It's the sperm that never should have made it!

Am I worrying for nothing??? We need fewer teachers and more geneticists on this board...

BTW Nenehooo if you actually managed to read Take Charge of your Fertility you're a better woman than me. It's longer than the Bible. Can you just summarise the good bits for me like I'm the really thick kid in an A-Level class? E.g. what is going on with the grapefruit juice? And should I be drinking it even though it's vile???

nenehooo just read your post about short cycle. I think if you are OV on day 11 or 12 it's grand having a 24 day cycle, if you were OV on day 18 or 19 might be more of a problem (something to do with a short luteal phase??? - this may be bollocks it's from memory) so you should be fine. That's my understanding from what I've read.

AF called here today too, so no surprise babies in the Cooper house either. Oh well! Good to hear the course is going well.

Moggle - that news about the booze is the best I've heard in a rather shit week. I thank you!

Notthehippo I understand what you mean. You do get attached to the little blighters bless 'em.

Nenehooo - I think it's time we had a serious talk to our respective mothers. There's something they're not telling us...

Hello all lovely ladies - here's to Xmas! x

Hello everyone!
Just to let you guys know AF has visited. So no accident baby:(
I think my course is going well, I've had two school days and had so much cramed into my head. I've found out its not an nvq as that's an out of date term.

It's fantasic to see loads of other peeps on this board! ( waves to everyone)
Lw

Thanks moggle have read up on it now - apparently you need to stop taking it after ov because it can cause cramps - maybe that's why I get crippling period pains every month?! As for men with cats, my OH cradles the cats, then says "Look honey, we don't need babies - we've already got them!" Hilarious.
On the downside, I got AF today - meaning my Cycle was 24 days this month, was hoping it would be 26 as that would mean it'd been the same for 3 months. But alas I'm still irregular
According to CM and OV pain I tend to OV around day 11 or 12 every month - is it bad to have short cycles?

splash you are welcome on the thread but just to point out that we are all waiting to try, not actively trying.

Chemise welcome to the thread!

Hullo all- I'm on the waiting platform for a variety of reasons, mostly the fact I've just started a new job. Do need to get a move on though- OH is nearly 40 (I am younger) and occasionally gets mopey about not having children yet but equally keeps referring to himself as 'not a grown up' so I am biding my time as much as screaming, weeping broodiness allows. Am a bit worried that by the time we get round to it I'll be the only mum we know with a baby (other people's children are at school :() but ah well, I believe said baby is quite time-consuming on its own...

Have been downloading menstrual cycle monitoring apps since I realised that even after so many years of life I have absolutely no idea when I'm ovulating and am being mightily amused by their conflicting verdicts, despite all theoretically working to the same information. Am trying to sort of dust myself off and shape myself up for TTC but I don't know how much I can do that's subtle enough not to be ridiculous, given we're not actively trying currently.

MrsPeggyPatch yes there is a very definite reason for dithering - he knows that after the holiday I want to TTC and he thinks that if he can keep putting the holiday back, he can keep putting off TTC. We are supposed to be doing this epic pre-baby fly drive to the West Coast USA, but anyone would think it was two weeks in a third world jail I was planning!

Pinsent that was an excellent post. I completely agree.

Hi, can I join you ladies? DP and I have just decided to start TTC #2. Have cut out alcohol and coffee (am keeping tea though - gotta have something to enjoy!!) Am also taking folic acid and vitamins etc. Can't believe I'm doing this again - having my son was wonderful, but such an emotional rollercoaster - it's taken ages for me to feel ready to even THINK about having another one. I must be crazy!! But yay, so excited!!

Question: does anyone else find it hard to muster the energy to DTD every other day? By the time little one goes to bed at night I'm shattered and ready for sleep myself!!

Both my SILs have had fertility problems. However one of them is barely able to support her first child financially, regularly drinks heavily in spite of having fertility treatments, also she ends up dumping her child on family everyday to take on her responsibilities such as nappy changing, dressing up daughter, putting her to bed etc. And it just makes me mad that they ttc for a second when they can barely manage the first.

Zara, congratulations! DH and I are heading off to Oz at the end of December which is when we've agreed to start ttc. Can't wait, already counting down the days on the calendar....
Peggypatch, good luck with the driving lessons! I passed my driving test just last month......decided to learn to drive, thinking it might come in useful with children in tow!

:0 zara i have to keep clearing my browsing history too on a regular basis! thanks for the list awayinamanger need to buy me some zinc and omega-3s!

I will be sticking my legs in the air or putting a pillow underneath when I finally start ttc weesooty let gravity do the work! I think after coming across this thread earlier on this year I presume it's safe to colour your hair www.mumsnet.com/Talk/pregnancy/1386-is-it-safe-to-dye-your-hair-while-pregnant/AllOnOnePage

weesooty you have my sympathies - We haven't had a baby in the family for ages either and 2 of my SILs are also TTCing (although both have fertility problems and are having treatments) and I sometimes (selfishly) think all 3 of us might be pregnant at the same time next year and mine won't matter as the other two have been trying for ages!

sooty you're not being selfish. I totally understand how you're feeling. When my SIL was struggling to get pregnant she refused to give up drinking & smoking or lose weight, yet she claimed she desperately wanted to get pregnant. Her argument was that if drug addicts can get pregnant then why should she give up booze & fags! If I had been struggling to conceive for almost 2 years, there isn't much I wouldn't do to help myself. So when she announced she was pregnant a little bit of me felt resentment. Its so annoying that there are women out there who don't even look after themselves & show no sense of responsibility yet fall pregnant at the drop of a hat, then there are lovely women who will make amazing mothers who struggle. Just remember that when your time comes you will be an incredible mum & your mum will have admiration for you rather than pity.

hello!! haven't been on a while, keep dithering about MN as I do have a tendency to get obsessed with these things!!!
Zara - how exciting!! woo!! I will be joining you on that January bus i hope...
nene - I think that you can carry on taking Evening primrose oil once you are TTC ( it is suposed to help with the old EWCM) but you stop at ovulation in case you get pregnant. I think it's just sensible to quit messing around with hormones once you could be pg.
whoever said about christmas drinking and TTC - I've heard that mother and baby don't actually share a blood supply until somewhere betwee 5 - 10 weeks, so alcohol won't pass to the fetus. So if you're not actually drinking so much that you're going to damage YOUR health, I don't think you need to worry too much. If my cycles continue as I expect, we'll be starting TTC over Christmas & New Year, I'm not going to stop drinking but i usually don't drink much anyway, maybe just a couple of glasses of wine each evening.

Wee Sooty - agree with you on the condoms, I love not being the one who has to get up and rush to the loo to deal with the mess! another one using durex featherlight... best thing is they don't smell of rubber gloves any more!! which is great as that smell always takes me back to my pre-DH days and naughty teenage fumblings..

So we are still on for end of december TTC... Husband is 100% on board too now and often initiates conversations about baby names :) He's also being massively protective and overly sweet with the cats too, I often catch him cradling one in his arms, singing to them definitely time for him to be a daddy!

I had a job interview a couple of weeks ago, for starting after christmas, when my PhD funding runs out. I should be pretty much finished writing up by then, and the job is at the same place I'm based now, so I don't have to start accruing maternity rights from scratch, hooray. It's public sector too so we're very grateful about how generous my mat leave is. Hopefully should find out this week if I've been successful... will throw a minor spanner in the works if I don't get it, but am fairly hopeful (3 interviewees for 2 posts...).

I'm much better able to deal with the babycrack now I know we are definitely starting TTC soon. I'm a massive tightwad though so I do find myself peeking at ebay for pushchairs etc rather than mama's and papas!! Also we're having a trip to the USA in May so have been researching what's cheaper to buy out there baby-wise!!