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Conception

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Sixth Form Common Room part IV - ttc and pregnancy post mc

993 replies

mousebacon · 21/08/2011 20:43

Roll up, roll up...

This is the place to be if you are ttc post mc / pregnancy loss and need a little spot to call home.

OP posts:
LadyMaybe · 24/10/2011 23:20

Hello - back again, sorry I'm not on very much at the moment, am still ridiculously tired so spare moments seem to be feeling the call of my bed. I really need a laptop, so I can prop myself up there and type away. iPhones are all very well for reading but not great for responding.
Apart from the tiredness all seems ok here, waiting for another appt on Thursday to get results of nuchal/bloods, fingers crossed it's all ok.
So what's been going on here?

Congrats to EdwardCullensOW fantastic news!!!! wishing you all the best for the coming weeks m'dear GrinGrinGrin

GreenOlives so sorry to hear of your losses, welcome to the thread. I've heard mixed things about testing after 2 + ectopic, I actually got tested after 2 consecutive because I'd had a MC before my DS (who is 3.7), so you might be 'lucky' if you approach your GP or ask about it during your gynae follow-up. It's worth a try, even though it can seem to take a long time. Does peppermint tea help with the wind pain?

Loup and Tina sorry to hear this month didn't work out. Sad Very hard when you're surrounded by reminders of other people's happiness. Perhaps your friend is is aware that it would be difficult for you to hear that she's pg and is unsure how happy she is about it, when she knows you'd dearly love it. I haven't had a hycosy myself, but a friend did before starting IUI and she said it was painful while it happened but not too bad afterwards and good to know tubes etc were clear. There is a theory that the flushing of the dye can clear the tubes out and prompt increased fertility afterwards, but I expect as more women don't fall pg afterwards than do. Has it been a year since your last pg?

mouseymouse poor you when it's bad, it's awful, just awful. How many weeks are you now? If there's any consolation, my worst weeks were around 7-10, it started easing 10-11 and now it's just evenings (right around 6-8pm, how handy Hmm). It's worth asking about anti-emetics, I don't know how useful they are if you're not actually throwing up, but have heard sometimes they can take the edge off. I got prescribed them but didn't actually use them because I assumed it wouldn't work on someone not throwing up all the time. Keep having little snacks, salt & vinegar crisps, ice lollies, crisp apple slices, lime cordial, all those sorts of things helped me. And sleep whenever possible. Poor you.

digi yay for a good scan Smile

Twittwoo and Wiggle good luck for yours Smile, Mouse is yours this week too?

ceropegia it probably would help to take a day off and allow yourself some time to cry. You have to let the tears out eventually, a big howl is often quite therapeutic. Big from me. Oh and don't be daunted by the 3-a-day method, it's not compulsory Smile, more often than not DH and I would only manage every 2-3 days and I usually was up the duff within 6 months (I'm 37). This time around we had sex once because I got a cold after that, it was on day 8 and I normally ovulated on day 15. I know these sorts of stories can be irritating when you're trying and trying and it doesn't work, but I think it just goes to prove it can be a complete f&*king mystery as to when it's going to happen and why.

Knitter Thinking of you on this sad day.

to Velvet, Falcons, Zam, Collie, Izzy, YRMOTB, and anyone else who I've missed.

CollieandPup · 24/10/2011 22:32

Oh tina I'm sorry sweet. There are no words to describe the unfairness. I hope you are ok. Does she know you are ttc and do you think that's why she's kept it quiet. Please don't place blame at yourself Sad. I can't say anything to make it easier. Life is unfair and you deserve a break and a chance to grow your family. It will be your time soon, but I know saying that doesn't help. (hugs) xx

(hugs) for knitter too.

TinaOnHerBroomstick · 24/10/2011 21:54

Me again...feeling very Sad. I'm in work with 2 happily pregnant ladies. Which I thought I was ok with...till I heard a rumour that one of my closest friends is pregnant. And I know that she didn't want anymore, she's already got a boy and twin girls. And she hasn't even told me. Why is it that she can do it accidentally and I can't do it deliberately? Sad

Velvetcu · 24/10/2011 21:49

Toy knitter I hope today has been ok for you.

TinaOnHerBroomstick · 24/10/2011 21:46

Quick question...I'm seriously considering booking a hycosy...any experiences?

TinaOnHerBroomstick · 24/10/2011 21:43

No proper period yet, just some brown cm. which annoys me more because I wish it'd just get on with it! Angry

KnitterNotTwitter · 24/10/2011 21:24

Sorry Tina... next month...

TomboyWife · 24/10/2011 20:14

Sorry to hear AF has got you Tina. :-(

Also thinking of Knitter and cero today and sending hugs and good vibes.

Still no sign of AF here, and the low-level nausea is back. Starting to wonder if I should test again after all.

Youremindmeofthebabe · 24/10/2011 18:11

Sad for knitter, cero and tina Big hugs ladies.

TinaOnHerBroomstick · 24/10/2011 17:36

Thinking of knitter and cero Sad

Did I say I was optimistic? Cancel that. The witch is on her way Sad. Another month passes Sad

IzzyWizzyletsgetbusy · 24/10/2011 17:29

Big ((hugs)) to knitter and cero those babies never really leave us you know xx

KnitterNotTwitter · 24/10/2011 16:59

ceropegia :)

I suppose it does become less fun/spontaneous but I find that throwing in the odd raspberry on DH's belly always makes DTD amusing :). It helps that we're quite efficient in our DTDing... 20 mins tops to be honest. If it was 1hr + shagathons each time then it would be quite a different challenge [chaffing emoticon]

But yes we do aim for 3x per day from last day of period until at least 10 or 12 days after that.

Tracking my basal body temperature I found that my mucus wasn't as reliable as I'd thought - for me the temperature seemed to be a better guide of ovulation. You can also get ovulation detection sticks to wee on - although I never had much luck with them.

Lots of hugs for your baby that should have been but never was. It's my 'due date' today for the baby we terminated and I've decided to work from home to have a quiet day by myself - totally get what you're going through.

ceropegia · 24/10/2011 16:38

WOW knitter i am AGOG!!! (and totally jealous too!) - let me get this straight...you DTD 3x per day from the last day of your period....for how many days? How do you do it? ...I mean I know HOW to do it, but how do you manage to do it that much and keep it fun/spontaneous/amusing???

Also, I'm confused about fertile time - I usually just observe CM and presume that EWCM means ovulation and we should DTD. My cycle is 26 days and my calculator says CD 9-15 are fertile days...do you think I should assume fertility from CD 6 onwards? My GP told me (perhaps because I told him the LAST thing I want to do is have sex) that doing it three times, say every other day between CD 9 and 15 would be ample....

Feeling pretty low today, remembering that little baby who would have been 3 months old now (It was a boy, apparently). I keep myself properly busy, but sometimes I can't stop crying. Often I think maybe if I just took a day off to stay in bed and JUST CRY, it would help.

Good luck those having scans this week - thinking of you, and hope you're all enjoying half term (which, after years of meaning absolutely nothing to me, has just become significant again as my DD is at nursery)...funny how you never really leave school!

Youremindmeofthebabe · 24/10/2011 13:58

zam I found AC did the same for me as wiggle- delayed ov by a couple of days rather than increased my LP, so I abandoned it too after 4 months. It does have links to a Scandanavian study, I think, where it is useful in women with recurrent mc when taken til 12 weeks. Moof told me that, and I think one of her friends had been recommended to take it for her pregnancy.

Boo for feeling so ill mouse, It's horrid. I felt so much worse this time round til about week 16. Have you tried motion sickness bands? They can sometimes work, and you can get them for around 2 quid in Superdrug or similar.

edwards Huge congratulations! What lovely news, so nice to hear it.

olives nice to meet you, So sorry to hear about your losses.

tina when are you testing??

Waves to everyone, been away for the weekend. And I am loving half term. We didn't get up til 8.13 here today- hurrah![hgrin]

TinaOnHerBroomstick · 24/10/2011 12:18

Im resisting testing collie. Yay for mat leave! You too izzy! Grin

Have you seen anyone about the ms mouse? A friend of mine needed medication to get her through it, she was admitted to hospital and needed iv fluids. It's worth visiting the gp before it gets that bad to try to get on top of it. You have my sympathies, it's such a yucky feeling Sad

CollieandPup · 24/10/2011 12:06

mouse sorry your feeling so crappy. I'm afraid I've no wise suggestions but have my sympathies. Are you sleeping ok? I found I felt so much worse when tired.

Tina I was chart stalking you this morning!!! Nice to see them temps back up! Fx!! ...tempted to test??? Smile

Good luck to scanners this week!

First day of mat leave today (yay) !!!

TinaOnHerBroomstick · 24/10/2011 12:00

Hi ladies!

Grin for lovely scan news from digi!

Well, I'm cautiously optimistic here...day 27 and no spotting to report...although ovulated late so I'm expecting a slightly longer cycle...

KnitterNotTwitter · 24/10/2011 11:03

Hey gorgeous ladies
Just saying hi - nothing wild to report!

olives The testing takes place over 6 weeks and then we were advised to not be PG when we came back for our results in case they found something and we needed treatment. So after the ectopic surgery I had a bleed, then a WTF (what the f*ck) cycle. Then we had a cheeky month of trying before being told to stop by the RMC people! Then it was 3 months off before getting the all clear from the RMC and starting to go for it again.

While we had our three months off I had a read around and one of the things I read (can't remember where I'm afraid) was how women who have repeated losses tend to be depleted in certain vitamins and minerals. It isn't clear if this is a cause or effect of the losses. So I took the following:

Co Enzyme C10 - for 1 month
Wild Yam - x2 per day
Selenium
Magnesium
Evening Primrose Oil
Pre-Conception vitamins (boots own)

I also tracked my basal body temperatures on www.fertilityfriend.com so I knew my 'normal' temperature pattern in a month - was very useful I thought. My pg chart here if you're interested.

Once we were cleared to start TTC again I had stopped the Co Enzyme C10 and upped the Wild Yam to 6x per day. Apparently it helps encourage ovulation as it's got natural progesterone in it. I only took it from last day of period to ovulation day.

I also followed Knitters patented 3x per day strategy. Where you DTD at least 3x per day from the last day of your period. So that is morning, once DS was asleep so early evening, and then again last thing. My theory is that this makes sure you're awash with good fresh sperm giving as good a chance as possible to get pg! Often my strategy causes shock and amusement with MNetters - it even has it's own thread somewhere in Conception! However DH and I like a challenge and it's proven to be a fun way to distract ourselves from the fact that we're TTC if that makes sense - the challenge becomes the thing we can control... managing to DTD 3x per day rather than the getting PG bit which is in the hands of the fertility gods :) Every time we've done it we've got pg first month - although obviously it doesn't come with a money-back guarantee!

GreenOlives · 24/10/2011 10:46

Morning ladies!
Twittwoo and wiggle I have everything crossed for happy scan news this week and I shall be waiting to hear.
Dinner at DMs was lovely thanks edward, think I ate too much though which didn't really help with my post-op "windy" pain last night, poor DH has had to listen to a lot of trumping over the last few days!
Hope you manage to get a little bit of "feet-up" time Izzy despite half term. I remember how lovely it felt to know that I'd finished work for several months at the start of my mat leave with DS! How long are you planning on having?
DM has volunteered to look after DS this morning so I am taking it easy and have some of my lovely work friends coming over to visit (they are nurses so I shall be well looked after) Still don't feel that the emotional aspect of what's happened has kicked in - am dreading it but I'll deal with it when it happens I suppose!

IzzyWizzyletsgetbusy · 23/10/2011 21:57

Good luck for Wednesday wiggle ! I've got 5 weeks to go now, have just finished work which is lovely but dcs are at home this week for half term so there will be No Rest just yet. Tis great to get to Sunday evening and realise there's no work tomorrow though Grin

edwardcullensotherwerewolf · 23/10/2011 21:43

mouse hooray for half term, hope you manage to recharge your batteries a bit.

Grin for the scan digi glad it went well! And good luck to Twittwoo and wiggle for your scans this week Smile

greenolives glad your feeling a bit better today, did you enjoy your dinner? I had a beef roast at DM's house tonight, yum Grin

Twittwooo · 23/10/2011 20:35

wiggle, I'll be thinking of you on Wednesday. All the very best for your scan. You've been through such a tough time and I can't even imagine what things must have been like for you, so I have everything crossed for a happy and healthy pregnancy this time. How far on will you be by the scan? Good luck!

getawiggleon · 23/10/2011 19:42

Grin for the wriggly scan digi.

Olives Sorry if I gave any mis-information re ectopic pg - Knitter sadly knows more about it than me so I'd listen to her! Wise words about the emotional scars too. I hope you manage to get comfy soon, sounds like you're in good hands!

Mouse Sorry you're struggling, you can pass some of the nausea over here if you like, I'm still not feeling any at present and would like a bit just to reassure. I'll swap you for some ginger biscuits..?

Zam really sorry af arrived Sad. I hope the multi-vitamin-holistic-therapy-smeg plan works! I tried AC for a couple of months and it lengthened my cycle by a couple of days but it seemed to delay ov rather than extend my lp which is not what I wanted so I stopped taking it. I can def recommend acupuncture for ttc in general and EPO was good too. If nothing else it gives you lovely shiny hair!

Izz How long to go now?

Twittwoo Good luck for tues, I have a scan on Weds to look for heartbeat

Twittwooo · 23/10/2011 18:15

Thanks Izzy, I had read a few different things so wasn't sure but that's really helpful to know. Thank you, and I'll let you all know how the scan goes.

I'm now trying to prepare myself a healthy meal consisting of pasta and vegetables instead of super noodles, which is secretly what I'm tempted to have!

IzzyWizzyletsgetbusy · 23/10/2011 17:14

Oh and mouse forgot to say, am sorry you're feeling so rough. Big hugs Sad