Thank you lovely ladies.
I've had a good sleep and have woken up feeling better. This LO was obviously not meant to be. We'll have a go with Frosty in the new year, and if he/she doesn't work then that'll be it for us. Dh will be 47 next year and, while having a child would be wonderful, it's not the be-all and end-all for us. We have a large family, with nephews and nieces of varying ages, all of whom we love dearly. In my family, there are several strong couples/women who are all child-free and they are living fabulous, fulfilled lives. Some of them tried to have kids but to no avail - so I'm not talking about militant antis here. They are good examples to me right now.
It may sound like I 'protest too much', but I'm just trying to be pragmatic. I've cried a lot today, but we knew the low odds from the outset so it's not a hideous shock, it's just very disappointing. But if we can be helpful and useful for the rest of our families and friends then that will be good too. Besides, we both have elderly parents who may need more care in the next few years. If it means I look after my mother while my sis brings up her family, so be it.
Don't get me wrong, I would love to hold our baby in my arms, but am also fairly reconciled to the fact that it may not (probably won't) happen. But what I would say to anyone who is lurking and who is under 35 is: get cracking now! I've left it too late, and that is my one regret.
oooh I've just reread this and I sound a bit like I've been smoking something naughty and am really chilled out...I wish!! I'm not, I'm just trying to look at the other side of all this. Don't worry, I'm not turning in to some sort of MN Pollyanna! Believe me, I'm upset, but am trying to turn it around.
love to you all, you are the most fabulous group of supportive, brilliant ladies I have ever met. It has helped me so much to be part of this thread, and a huge special thanks must go to gardenpixie for starting it in the first place.
love you all longtime
xx