Just MC and ready to try again? Pack your leathers, black nail polish, air guitar and jump in the mosh pit for some serious metalling. All welcome! (Part 17)

just jumping on to snaffle a chocolate brownie we are all a bit glum at the mo so i wanted to just send some PMA PMA PMA all the way

missg i am sending some extra PMA to Li'l R xxxxx

sorry for quick message - will try and catch up tomorrow, weekends are never my MN forte as i catch up much better whilst at work!

pie happy to share cake with you hope you made it to M&S - I do like their dine in for £10 offer!! I'm going to make prawn risotto tonight as decided I'd make the most of the prawns before I hopefully have to be more careful with them!!

Hope everyone is doing ok for a Friday and has a great weekend! Not sure how much I'll make it on in the next couple of dasy as weekend is going to be manic...but then next week brings on lots of POASing in the most room so there'll be lots of hand holding for support in waiting, hopefully a few bfp's and not many AF's!! PMA as missg would say!!

blue I had a very similar experience yesterday. I was at the dressmaker getting my bridesmaid dress taken up, and I looked in the mirror and thought that the last time I had the dress on I'd just had my bfp :(

Deffo need CAKE CAKE CAKE today. Sod it, off to M&S at lunch to get a dinner for a £10 deal :)

feeling really sick this morning...but it could just be that I am SO tired...just been a manic week and not been sleeping well either. Weekend crazy busy too though so no chance for a lie in! I have decided to count my DPO from Monday when I had the pains which would make me 4dpo today which is frustrating as I had been counting from last Thursday which would've made me 8dpo...oh how I wish I'd bought some opks this month to have a better idea about ovulation...grrrr...on the plus side though my CB Digis arrived from amazon this morning so they're ready for next week...PMA PMA!

missg so sorry to hear about your cousin and her little boy...really hope for good news soon!

Pie I too have been thinking about December getting closer and therefore due date getting closer still. Strangely I was at a meeting last night which I only have approx 4 times a year and the meeting before last was the day I got my bfp and I was remembering how I was feeling having my excited secret not able to tell anyone I am trying to stay PMA to get a bfp before my due date...that is my main aim at the moment!

shimmery I think I'll def be going for the opks next month if AF comes next week. Thanks for the info re. FMU too...the afternoon's would be way too stressful! Sorry about your cat - sounds like he's quite fiesty!

pebs hope you have a great holiday!! Enjoy!

Feel the need for friday cake

pebs enjoy your hols! sounds lovely! FWIW acupuncture has helped me. It's very relaxing for starters and it has brought my ov date fwd from CD20 to CD17 this month which is good.

shimmery I know what you mean about 'not feeling' it this month. I feel the same. I did get my letter through though from the fertility clinic so have to fill in a questionnaire and sent it back before we will get an appt. My gp thinks I have ov' probs so suggested clomid but she can't prescribe it, only the clinic can so more waiting! So sorry to hear about your cat!!!

pie i think you just have to allow your self to feel sad if thats what you are feeling. thats what my counsellor told me to do.

shimmery i feel sorry for your poor cat. i have three cats and hate it when anything happens to them.

missgiraffe how do you feel about the cat being out of the bag? hope your cousins baby gets better soon.

i have decided to try and chill out about the missing periods. my chart on fertility friend has changed to day and it doens't think i ov'd now. looks like it could just be a hormone problem. i have booked in for acupuncture next week to try and rebalance my hormones.

i am off on holiday for a few days tomorrow woo hoo! four days of all inclusive luxury with dh!

Blue - I know people say it's best to use OPKs in the afternoon, but I've used them for 2 months now and can honestly say that there has not been a problem getting a positive using FMU. this may be because I'm on the digital ones (I can not be dealing with trying to assess the darkness of a line). There's no way could get organised enough to use them in the afternoons.

Sorry you're feeling down Pie. I think the answer is to deal with it one day at a time, and try to keep busy (especially keeping busy with DTDing :)). We will get there eventually - it is just going to take a bit of time.

And Manda - bloomin' heck, it sounds like you're going to bankrupt yourself with all those sticks!!! I know it is hard, but do try to step away from the sticks - particularly those where you are judging the strength of lines. That way madenss lies.

No real news from here. Work remains busy but fun, I have a cold (grrr) and one of my cats has been in a fight (the one whose previous fight left him with an infected ear). The most recent fight left him having his leg stitched back together (he has a lovely bandage now - bright red, just to clash with the orange fur).

Sadly, I am very doubtful that June is my month. I just don't feel pregnant. I used to scoff at the idea that you could just know - but I knew something was different last month and turned out to be right, even if it was very short-lived.

missg hope baby R is getting better, thinking of you and your family and sending positive vibs across Scotland!

Sorry for bit of a me, me post this morning. I woke up with a real sense of sadness today. It felt really heavy IYKWIM. I keep reading that it's 100 days to Christmas and it just really brought the sadness of the loss back. Due date would have been 23rd Dec which is the same day I went into labour with DS. I haven't got a clue how I am going to cope come Christmas time as time seems to be speeding up at the moment, and it's getting closer and closer. I know we all have / had due dates to deal with and I really don't know how i'm going to deal with it :( Any suggestions most welcome!

Anyway! On a brighter note I heard from my chum last night who m/c a month before me and she is now 9 weeks pg and, fingers crossed, all seems to be okay. In her area though (Leeds) they don't give you any early scans if you've had a m/c (which seems a bit rubbish).

Happy friday feelings to all and sorry about my downer message today!

Just a quick one:

Think I'm a little bit to far away for your parties Blue although am coming to London for hen weekend next weekend! The cat is sooooo going to be out of the bag. I would really rather not tell anyone this early, but it is my soon-to-be Step MIL's hen do, and my 2 SILs are going, there is no way they would believe any story I made up about not drinking on a hen weekend to London. The amount, and variety, of champagne cocktails we have been planning to drink on the train on the way down has been the subject of much discussion in recent months!

Wee baby R is not too well, looks like he might need a tranfusion as his bilirubin is near the critical level despite upping the phototherapy . (Hearing these things always makes me wish I could give blood). And, my cousin's not too well either, possibly retained placenta but they're investigating. She must be stressed out of her head.

Afternoon all ? thanks for the helpful advice re. my ovulation dilemma! Given time for little swimmers making their way into position and eggy moving towards them I guess the day before could work well feeling better now?thank you! I know the Sperm Meets Egg plan says to SWI on day of Ov as well that?s why I was a bit about it all!

manda we are pretty close!! Would have to promise no discussion of CM or other SWI related issues
I?m pretty sure I would be testing like you as well but with my sensible hat on it?s probably best to leave the tests! And to throw a complete spanner in the works with my MMC I ended up in A&E the week before I found out about the MMC as I was feeling very odd ? separate issue but they did a pregnancy test that day and said it was a very strong positive, then only a week later I found out at 12w scan that nothing had got past 5-6 weeks so somehow my body had continued to produce and increase the level of hcg without a viable pregnancy so unfortunately for me even repeated testing won?t reduce my stress

pie I used opk?s a little the month I got my bfp that ended in the MC but I ran out before I got a positive as I wasn?t oving until CD25 ? but figured that out due to feeling it happen and remembering (from my trusty excel chart) that I?d had weird pains on CD25 each month after coming off the pill?or at least that?s what I think was happening. If we?ve not caught the egg this cycle then I?ll be getting some opk?s for next month?if I?m honest I found them a bit of a pain since everyone said I should pee in the afternoon which is when I?m at work and holding pee for 4 hours beforehand/not drinking doesn?t always work

pie and summer it?s Jamie Oliver?s lovely kit rather than Pampered Chef which is great as it means I don?t have to cook in front of anyone/demonstrate stuff (though I do love cooking) as there?s a DVD of Jamie preparing a recipe and talking about his products! There?s too much nice stuff in the new catalogue though ? I?m going to have to be careful not to spend all my earnings in there!

pebs so sorry to hear about AF continuing to be AWOL?what a pain!

poppy I know how you feel about the long cycles ? before MC I was up to 37 days which just seemed like forever?waiting for Ov/SWI time and waiting for 2ww just seemed to take aaaagees!!

Hi ladies, there are still some brownies lurking in the cake tin if anyone wants them

Pebs so sorry you are feeling so frustrated I really hope that you get some good advice from your consultant so that you can get yourself to a good place (mentally I mean) ready to start again. This is such a horrible time.

MissG really hope things improve for your cousin's little one.

Ho hum just waiting for a temp rise to show ovulation over here. Had a real dip this morning so hoping that means that I'll see the rise tomorrow. Really hope so - I am CD 25 today. HATE my long cycles, makes it such a long old wait to see whether anything has happened....BAH!!

HI to everyone else, got to go DS just woken from nap catch you later.

i am taking my temps every morning so should be able to see if my hormones are cycling normally and that will be the big clue.

thanks manda i know 10 weeks isn't abnormally long especially in my circumstances but i suppose you just start freaking out about everything don't you. i hate all the uncertainty and just want to feel normal really.

won't be long until i can see my consultant and hopefully she might be able to help me.

Ah, so sorry peb - but yes, I did ask about the erpc with asherman's in mind - lovely lady from my march 2010 (ds2) post natal group has it. It's taken until fairly recently to find out though and happened following complications from her march2010 birth. Luckily she's been treated now - it was a fairly mild case of just the cervix scarring shut, her uterus was pretty much intact.

Thing is with asherman's you will still be hormonally cycling so will still pms (if you get that and most of us do to a degree where we recognise af arriving) and often you will cramp but not bleed (cramping from the uterus trying to expel the lining which is going nowhere). I know there's a great support thread on here... somewhere.

I would say that 10 weeks isn't terribly excessive given how late your loss was, but it really doesn't hurt to be proactive. Yes, it's apparently rare. But that doesn't mean it doesn't happen because clearly it does.

Really hope that's not what is delaying your period but if it is, there's lots of hope to sort it.

i go to counselling too. i find it quite theraputic to off load all my worries every week. my work organised it for me.

manda you asked me if i hade been induced and had op to remove placenta which i did. did you ask me in relation to my missing periods?

i am really stressing that i have ashermans now. it's where your womb sticks together with scar tissue after an erpc and your periods can't get out. it really messes up your fertility as nothing can get in or out and everything is stuck together.

i have sent an email to an expert in london who should be able to fix the problem. i will see what he advises.

it's pretty rare so i probably havn't got it but arrrggghhh - where are my periods?

pie i too am wondering whether blue is doing Pampered Chef? a friend of mine did them and their stuff is vaairy nice. i have the muffin tray and dibber (or whatever its called!). i have wowed many a coffee morning with my whipped up muffins! . Sadly i am nowhere near you (South Manchester) otherwise i would be there!

And i agree with manda that SWI the day before OV is on the money, it worked for DS and also for my MC bean.

manda good news on being bumped up the list for counselling, i cannot recommend it highly enough, i am in a much better place than i was in July, i still hear my counsellor in my ear when my sister/mother get me wound up!

boobeez there is a conception app??? a friend of mine was saying there is a Breastfeeding app too! tells you which boob you last fed from and for how long..!

Oh, and forget to mention, the Dr is referring me for counselling - she said it is quite a long waiting list but I have a reason now (new pregnancy) for being bumped up the list, somewhat. It'll be with the Prioy group so me and the Stars/Slebs shall be mingling and then I'll be All OK Again. Wait, what? It doesn't work like that!? Darnit.

I didn't see my usual doctor (pretty sure she was one of those 'almost quaified, just needs to do x hours of consults before she is fully fledged, as it were - they always have them at my surgery) and I mentioned to her that the EPU said they would keep an eye on me and give me extra scans so she said she'd refer me to them but I'm unsure as to whether she will specifically be requesting a viability scan - which is what she should do. Oh well, I'll give her a call in a week if I havent heard anything.

pie I shall be stalking your chart! I too, find charting somewhat addictive... and so empowering too. It (mostly) takes away a lot of the mystery of our cycles and I KNOW that since the mmc (I no longer feel O whereas I used to and so KNOW I'd Od) I'd have been going out of my mind testing/waiting for af when it wouldn't even have been due! Fx for you this month, you and all hthe June Massif!

Sorry manda crossed posts!!!! I can totally understand the mentalling! Can you get an early scan in your area just to put your mind at rest? Not sure how 'early' is good to be seen at though? 7 weeks?

Hi Peeps!

Well have had 2 raised temps now so am pretty sure I ovulated on Tuesday and so the 2ww begins! Have to go for another CD21 blood test though as my result wasn't good last month (boooo) but then I knew straight away I wasn't pg as it was so low (whereas the month I was pre m/c my CD21 result was much higher).

Blue - do you use OPKs or temperature chart to gauge ovulation day? I think that's the advantage of using fertility friend in that it does show you when you've ovulated (only after 3 raised temps though) but it does become mildly addicitive putting the info in each day! I use it with a combination of OPKs. We do try and SWI every couple of days but I just don't have the energy to do it from the end to start of AF so at least this way I have a 7-10 day window to aim for! :) Are your parties like Pampered Chef ones? I would love to come but live about 500+ miles away from you!

eve enjoy Disneyland Paris!!!

Waves to everybody else! Hope you are doing okay missg & manda - when is your scan missg? xx

summer not sure how much PMA I have either but that is purely down to work stress. I just can't help it however much I try not to! PAH!!!

I haven't had any caffeine since the m/c! I can't quite believe it myself, that's been 4 months now and I am amazed that I managed to give up my daily diet coke! I am shattered today though and would LOVE a nice fat filter coffee!

Love to all !!

blue IF those pains were O (did you notice any fertile cm too?) then SWI on Sunday is absolutely PERFECT. With both DS2&3 swi the day before O seems to have done the trick. So don't worry!

As for where you live... it seems like we live VERY near to each other! I'm on the border of Richmond and SW London (postcode is London, but two minutes walk up the road and I'm in Surrey. But grew up in Isleworth and DD was born in West Middlesex hospital!). Have to admit I'm not realy up for direct selling for a variety of reasons, but perhaps a meet up at some point would be nice

missG Fingers tightly crossed for your cousin's poor wee man. DS2 had to have IV antibiotics which I found traumatic (not least because they got me to help with the procedure to put the cannula in - ugh, awful) so goodness knows how I'd cope with more intensive care. I suppose you just do, don't you?

Me? FULL ON METAL. FRERs frightened the life out of me by staying the same or vauely getting lighter for three days... so I got some more superdrug early tests (which is what I was watching my progression with before) and two cd digi. CB digi gave me a 2-3 week reading with afternoon wee, so perfect, and superdrug was significantly darker than the last one three days previous... and breathe. Then the superdrug one the following day looked vaguely lighter again! Cue MORE METAL. So my final FRER this morning given it's two days since the last one - MUCH darker, test line finally much darker than the control (I'm 20dpo). I obviously want to do the second digi and get a 3+ reading and in theory that would be tomorrow but I'll try and leave it until sunday to be sure.

I know, I know, I should JUST STOP TESTING but... I can't.

omg missg sending lots of good vibes to your likkle wee nephew ////\ i hope he gets better soon and is back out of those feeding tubes

nothing much to report here, no symptoms to speak of this morning. think my PMA has buggered off as i am less hopeful of a BFP this month. but there are worse things to be blue about. my sister was moaning the other night that she is going on hols with her friend in Oct but they are arguing about where to go.. oh to have problems like that!

Morning all... missg really hope your cousins's little one is doing a bit better this morning!

I'm in need of a bit of PMA...had bad cramps on Monday (it felt like implantation did last time)...though it did seem a bit early (CD20). When it happened last time I got my bfp 3 days later, so I POAS (IC) this morning and got a bfn...now panicing that the pain I felt was late ovulation and that we've now missed it this month and peaked too early with all the SWI last week as we haven't managed it since Sunday this week due to work etc...grrrr...trying to stay positive and tell myself the pain on Monday wasn't ovulation or implantation, that it was just trapped wind and that there is still a little bean floating around waiting to implant...need to keep PMA but it's so hard!! On the flip side I have signed up to start doing some direct sales parties (like Tuppaware but not that brand) for some lovely kitchen and homewear and have my launch party on Saturday...if I do get my bfp in the next week then I could well end up way too tired for doing the parties I've got booked, but if not then at least I can get off to a good start with that IYSWIM clearly dealing with the tiredness due to a bfp would still be my preference though!! (incidentally if anyone is localish to West London/Heathrow and fancies hosting a party PM me )

So to answer your prodding question missg in the morning's I prod and feel decidedly unpregnant but in the evenings it feels more hopeful...but in the light of what I've posted above I really have no idea at all!!

boobeez of course you're welcome back!!

Sorry not to namecheck everyone but better get on with some work, sorry also for a bit of a 'me' post...catch up later!

Hello all! Thanks for the congrats everyone and for being so friendly :0) I felt a bit cheeky coming back. I think my due date is 19th May summer. not really sure though because my mc was in July and I have only had one period since which was 5 weeks after mc... Should go and see a doc, but am waiting a while...prob should go soon though. I am 4weeks 4days according to my iPad app! That's a long way to go!

Eve sorry you feel a bit flat about everything. Hope you have a fabulous time in Disneyland though!

Blue my boob-prodding buddie! How are the gazongas today? Mine feel tiny bit tender but reckon it's just from all the prodding! Actually, I think I had a real sign/symptom today. I was out early at a meeting, and it ran on, so I was really hungry when I got in the car, and boaked the whole way home! I don't think it's morning sickness as such, just that - like the last twice - I get boaky if I let myself get too hungry when pg. Great excuse to eat more!! And I have definitely had the evening bloat going on these last few nights.

Summer I think I get an early scan due to having had an ectopic, rather than the MC. It must be awful having such a long wait though. You know we'll all be here to metal with you through it! PMA all the way!

Hi to everyone else. Cousin's wee baby took a turn for the worse last night. He's ok, but they've had to up the phototherapy lights and, although he had been out of the incubator and starting to feed, is back in with feeding tubes. The poor wee lamb! Hope he gets better soon.

baby my message to you stopped short! i meant to add that i hope you got your windows sorted? you seem to be channelling Cathy from Wuthering Heights!