Just MC and ready to try again? Pack your leathers, black nail polish, air guitar and jump in the mosh pit for some serious metalling. All welcome! (Part 17)

Hi Zebra and welcome. So sorry to hear of your MMC but glad you've found us. You'll meet a mad bunch on here, but also a very supportive, and - quite frankly - invaluable group of women. I don't know who else I would have ranted to if I didn't have my metaller MN buddies!!

PMA is what it's all about. Not always so easy in practice but, if one of us is down, the others will help to pick us up again. That's the great thing about it.

Hope you enjoy your weekend too, and are being taken care of

And I will gladly accept a , cheers (only since it's Friday of course )

Ah, thanks so much ladies, really appreciate the welcome.

(Always overjoyed with cheeky wine or chocolate - in fact been experimenting with microwave-ability of latter for optimal warm-and-goey-ness (it's been a slow week). Rocky road performing most favourably :).)

Wishing everyone a lovely (and relaxing!) long weekend.

that was supposed to be

zebra hi welcome you will fit right in here

about your mmc but good to hear you are channeling the PMA.

got to dash as DS on lap but catch you all in a few days

Hi Zebra, you are very welcome :). We're definitely focussed on the PMA, and if you feel ready to join, then it's the perfect time.

We are also focussed on chocolate (mmmm - rocky road...)

Hi everyone , wondered if you'd mind me coming to join you?

I had an MMC diagnosed last week, ERPC on Tuesday. Sooo, while I know it's early for me to be shuffling over here, I have fingers crossed I'll get to return to the ttc fray when the wounds (of all types) are healed.

The miscarriage threads are lovely and supportive, but of course very , and now I've done my share of sobbing it would be fab to come and hang out with you lovely forward-looking ladies and generate some of the olde PMA (she says optimistically, as doubtless I'll be in full need of the excellent-sounding padded cell when it actually comes down to it).

Plus, I'm happy to bring along much and to contribute if that's any help :)...

and have a lovely weekend everyone

Hi ladies i have had a manic few days, busy at work and i have had a stinking cold, so i have been lurking and every time i go to post i get called away by work/DH/DS etc etc which is highly frustrating

Anyway i just wanted to jump on and say good luck to whatso you will be missed but you absolutely should take a break for a month or two, let the medication do its stuff then re-evaluate. Wishing you all the best and keep in touch, we may see you on chat or AIBU (we shall be allies of course )

sorry i havent had a chance to fully catch up but we are off to the ILs for the Bank Hol weekend so i wont get a chance to catch up until tuesday now.. so i have baked you all some rocky road (without raisins as i cant stand them!) - i know we are all trying to be good but fill your boots its the weekend!

I am 13 DPO today so expecting AF to arrive tomorrow - i am only CD26 today but am a little apprehensive this month, like i reeeeeally want to be PG but am scared to be now

And i am loving blues PMA and optimism - loved how you were researching flights for the olympics around your potential due date!! thats what i like to see!

waves to everyone - really sorry for not name checking but need to go and replace all the DVDs that DS has kindly arranged on the floor!

Have worked an hour extra, now the sun is gone and it has been pi$$ing down, thunder & Llghtening too. I feel cheated

Oh man, I can't catch up! Keep reading back then forgetting who said what by the time I get to the bottom. I'll need to take notes soon. And I thought I was a chatterbox?! (And, I just realised I wrote "I thinked.." in a previous post What is wrong with me?! Oh, I know, I must be pg and I have placenta brain already )

Except, POAS yesterday and today, bfn of course. AF due Mon/Tues. Will try to hang on to last stick until Monday if AF not here.

Whatso glad to hear your GP appointment went well. Maybe even having a month or so off TTC will allow you some time to relax without the constant stress of waiting for AF, cursing AF, willing AF away followed immediately by SWI did I/did I not Ov?, the 2ww, symptom spotting etc etc. will help in itself. Best wishes and hope to see you back and happy in a month or two. x

Manda whoohoo, go DD, clever girl! That's amazing. Btw, your last post was very calming and sensible. I think I'll switch over from Rock to Classical FM just for a short time

Blue whoohoohoo! NYE! Lucky you. Fingers crossed for a neat little bump by then . As I said, PMA that next months will be the month. I should know by Monday if I'll be joining you in another month of TTC madness (I suspect so).

Pie Sorry to hear your Progesterone wasn't what you hoped it would be, but from your earlier post, it sounds like you've seen some improvement in terms of things settling down? Try to focus on the positive (I sound so confident, yet I was googling short luteal phase for about 2 hours the other night at about 1am in the morning! Even though I have no reasons to believe I have a problem with that ).

Marathon I set that program to record, but DD has set 2 other things to record too, so gues whose choice got scrubbed?? Wish I had seen it, sounded really interesting.

Hi everyone else IQ Eve Shimmery Summer Baby , congrats to those losing weight, gaining weight (the baby definitely needs cake), happy hols to those going away for the weekend/week, good luck to those POAS this weekend (eeek! FX for some BFPs, Shimmery, hope you're coping with the metalling ok) and have fun to everyone going for it with the SWI this weekend!

The sun is out and as soon as I finish work at 4, I am heading out the back door with a small

Keeps the chins up ladies, the tits out (even if they are different sizes ) and PMA PMA PMA PMA PMA PMA all the way to BFP (and D day of course!) smile]

shimmery I think it might be worth testing in the morning? The 'moistness' could be a symptom as I had that last time, but then also had it earlier this week before AF arrived so not absolutely a sure fire sign...as with all possible AF/PG symptoms they're so so similar...v frustrating! Keep us posted!

manda forgot to say re. your DD's results!! Fantastic news!

eve can you send some sunshine up here? been chucking it down with rain all morning so not boding well for the BH weekend...

Right...back to work...catch up later!!

I'm glad your doctor could help whatso. Taking a break sounds like a good idea. We'll see you in a while.

Blue and Eve - no sign at all. What's getting me is things are (ahem) a bit moist down there IYSWIM, which is what things were like last time. It really is making me hopeful, damn it - despite the BFN a week ago. However, my boobs aren't particularly sore. Not sure if it's all just wishful thinking

Sorry blue - NY how exciting you never know you might concieve over ther and have to call the baby new york!!! Fingers crossed it happens before then though. How wonderful.

Morning all

Hope you are all looking forward to a lovely long weekend?

Manda - well done to your daughter you must be very proud. Hope the pizza was good - I am trying to be good for the next 9 days til sister posh wedding. Although I am not so sure a few pounds will make any diffierence 20lb to go til goal so really like to get to it this year!!

Pie hope you are ok and your few days is everything you need it to be. Relax and let others do things for you. Take it easy and be kind to yourself.

Whatso - good to hear your doctor has been supportive. Think a break is a good idea, it is shocking how ttc takes over your life. Hope that with the support and tablets you get back to a good place. Take the support that is out there (did u say you had support line through work?) Hopefully we will have you back in a month or two ready to get back to it :-)

Shimmery - how are you feeling today? I feel nothing this morning but v achey last night and emotions are swinging wildly from wanting to kill DP for no reason to wanting to weep for no reason. Really trying not to get my hopes up. Have in laws for the weekend so won't test til they have gone although AF might arrive before then.

Well the sun is out the house work is done and I have 2 loads of washing on the line. Hoping for a day on the isle of Wight this weekend if is stays nice.

Chin up everyone :-)

manda found your post very interesting?and hoping that it might be true for us that technically ?3 months in? 3 months to fix we might have a better go this cycle!! Though for me that is slightly confused by it being an MMC that was therefore 3 months but not doing much except pumping out confusing hcg for about 6 weeks! will stick with the PMA that hopefully we?ll get there this cycle! So glad you are feeling more positive about it all!

shimmery how are you doing today? Any sign of AF?

pie really hope you?re feeling a bit better this morning?amazing how the hormones and emotions of it all can be so raw?really hope your holiday provides some good relaxation (and hopefully no AF too!!)

whatso really glad your doc was supportive and helpful and really hope you feel better soon and that the SSRIs help.

Despite heavy AF it?s all rather excited over at HQ BlueCrane as we?ve booked our flights to NYC for friend?s wedding in November they?ve offered us to stay at their flat (they?re in a ncie hotel!) so we don?t need to pay for accommodation which has made the trip more viable cost wise?veeery excited?though have found out that the guy (DH?s friend) used to be a catwalk model and is now marrying a catwalk model so now am panicking a little about what to wear (will wedding be full of super tall skinny beautiful people in designer gear?!?)?and will I be pregnant by then (could be 10 weeks ish if we conceive this cycle) and will I be showing/v bloated etc etc at that point!!! But that would be a good problem to have!

Wishing everyone a Friday!!

Morning metallers

Been to the docs today about my stomach and low mood and have come out with a prescription for each. The doctor was really good and glad I went - I came out as severe on the depression diagnostic thing which was worse than I expected. He told me that he thought it was an internal issue exacerbated by the miscarriage, deaths and work stress rather than caused by them, hence the drugs potentially helping.

From a TTC perspective, he has advised taking 4-6 weeks off. You are only supposed to take SSRIs when trying to conceive if the benefits outweigh the risks (risks being unknown side effects on unborn baby) and they can't tell if there are any benefits to me until I take them. So I will follow that advice and have a month off I think.

I'll probably take a wee leave of absence from here during that time although I'm sure I will lurk as I don't want to miss any good news, especially BFPs

Thanks so much for all your support these last three months, see you in a month or so.

thanks so much manda I must admit I've started blubbing now at your kind words!! I feel like i've had a very good hug !!! What you've said makes total sense

I think what has happened for me this month is a combination of things. It's been incredibly stressful at work (breaking down in tears due to workload etc) which happened around when I should have ov'd on CD16/17 and delayed it until CD19. When FF gave me the red lines I then booked the blood test for 7 days after the Ov date. Anyway my GP has booked me in for tomorrow for a repeat test to 'see' (as on my first CD21 test my results were 26 at 3dpo and 41 at 10dpo although that was when I was pregnant (pre m/c).

I am pretty sure I have ovulated but from what Dr Google is leading me to believe the corpus thingy / egg was of poor quality so hence the low progesterone.

However all my other blood tests were fine (thyroid, prolactin and the 7 others!) so will need to book CD3 ones. She did say I wasn't menopausal but I thought that was from your CD3 tests which i've not had yet?

I know what I need to do and that is chill the feck out (it's work but i'm trying so hard not to let it get to me), take more exercise and just relax more. I do think the acupunture is helping though. I haven't spotted yet and made it to 9dpo, it could all start tomorrow but i'll be a day further on than last month!!

We are going on holiday this w/end and unfortunately looks like clashing with AF otherwise would have been a lovely SWI break! But, what's more important right now for me is some holiday time away from the stresses and strains of work with my DP & DS :)

Must apologise for the me,me,me post everyone, am so sorry!! I hope you are well.

I really don't know what I'd do without you all!

pie

First, did you have the blood draw at CD21, or 7DPO (because those two days are different with your late O)?

THis is what I think - your chart is showing a pretty clear thermal shift, that matches both your cm and your monitor readings - you HAVE O'd. What seems quite apparent is that your progesterone probably is a little on the low side because... you're still recovering from your mc!

However, things are clearly improving - last month you spotted from 8DPO and your LP was only 11 days. THis month you you are 9DPO with no spotting (right? you haven't marked any!) so looking better already...

I had a thought come to me today, and maybe it's me trying to make myself feel better but it seems to make a weird kind of sense. Y'know 'they' say re: baby weight post partum that it takes nine months to go on and so realistically you should give yourself nine months to go back the other way? Well, my weight wasn't an issue post partum, but we didn't use any protection at all after the birth and considered ourselves 'not trying, not preventing' joking, in a scared tone, that I'd fall pregnant if we werent careful. It wasn't until the 8th month PP that I suspected something was up - spotting from 7-10 dpo. A suuuuper faint line on hpts from 10-12dpo, then back to stark white 13 and 14 dpo with af arriving on time 15dpo. I think I had a chemical. It was at that point we realised we actually DID want to be pregnant so started actually trying and I fell pregnant straight away that month. DS2 was 9 months. He was in nine months, and once out for nine months I was 'back to normal'

It's really looking from my chart really 'calming down' and my feelings coming to a more even keel that I may finally be returning to 'normal' following my mc - the 5th cycle after losing a baby at 4 months... it's like I've had a 4 months in, four months PP straightening out.

I could be talking absolute bollocks but it seems to apply to me.

Believe me, I know that impatience of wanting to just get back to normal but we really need to just... give it time. I think, at least the amount of time you were pregnant.

As I say, thing seem to be looking better from your chart this month. And you HAVE O'd. There's lots to feel positive about! Just give your poor little body a chance to heal - be kind to yourself.

manda wow, clever DD!! fantastic proud mummy!

I am all doom and gloom, my CD21 progesterone results are 21 which is too low (need to over 30 to show ovulation apparantly) I am so down My chart does show a temp rise though so not sure what that means,MWAHHH

Blue I am now 15 days post ovulation (so today is day 30 of what is normally a 26 day cycle). I really thought that AF was coming this lunchtime but, that was over 4 hours ago.

I'm not testing until Monday eve. I suspect it will be game over by then anyway.

Glad you're feeling happier manda and congratulations to your DD.

Afternoon all.. pie where DH works it's shift work but they don't believe in any pattern to the shifts (apparently did some research and showed it's better for your health to do totally irregular shifts ) so some days he'll do 6am-1pm other days 3:45pm-11pm and a graduation of start and finish times in between and some night shifts ...some weeks he'll do mostly earlies so we can see each other in the evening, some weeks he'll do a total mix so could finish at 11pm and be back in at 8am?! some weeks he'll be on majority lates...but the problem is then that he's shattered the whole time and often asleep when I get up (or at work) and then I could be asleep when he gets home. And I've tried the 'waking him up early for some SWI before I go to work' and it really wasn't a good idea at all as he was SO sleepy..well...we managed it but it took ages He's desperately searching for a new job but in this climate it's not so easy...it's actually a very good job that he's got at the moment (Government) but just the shifts which are a real pain and trying to plan life and SWI around them!! Sorry...that was a rather long explanation...

manda here's a large WOO...HOO for you...roll on the Ovulation!!! Enjoy the pizza bread and danish...sounds yummy!

Right...off to a meeting...happy afternoon all...not long til the weekend now!!

Omg, and I totally forgot to say am bursting with pride - DD's GSCE results were great - 3A's, 8B's, 3C's and two 'passes'. She's totally over the moon and worked hard (she's not particularly academic - yet one of her A's was for English Lit.)

That's underlines* how awful things have been...

Custard skin, eve That'd be a surefire way for me to lose weight... I'd rather starve!

Good to hear from you, IQ Glad you still have your sister around to take care of you and perhaps offer physical violence when needed

Well. Can I get a Woo and, indeed, a Hoo? CD19 and finally have a positive opk! I usually O the day after so it looks like tomorrow will be The Day.

I've been feeling calm and almost happy at times the last couple of days. It's nice. And really underlies how awful things have been. I hope it's the start of the balance tipping back to more happier times.

I may have missed out on the crumble, but DP is on his way with some fantastic pizza bread and a danish from a bakery near where he used to live. Hey, this egg I'm about to hatch needs pizza and danish, okay?! Defensive, me? Somehow, the scales say I lost 1.3kg since YESTERDAY so I have no qualms about satisfying this need. But a fishfinger sandwich sounds awesome, too. With lashings of tomato ketchup. YUM!

Afternoon all

I started reading this at 9 this morning and have just got 5 mins to catch up. Have had busy morning and got no where fast.

Blue - hope you are ok, good to hear you are making SWI plans for next month. What are these mad shifts your DP works that you miss him for days?? I think you can safely say you need to save for those expensive flights :-) it will be sods law. Fingers crossed for next month though.

Whatso - hope you have a nice weekend away. It look like my out laws are not leaving now so my peaceful weekend has gone for a burn. Working from home you have to love it. 6 1/2lb loss well done you. That must be a few of the lb I have put on then :-)

Marathon 7th will soon come round.

shimmary/Pie.... when r u going to test then?? I am holding off right now. Will play chicken with you. In my head I am holding off til mon. No sore boobs so not PG in my opinion so trying really hard not to get my hopes up. Also only have 1 asda test so don't want to waste it. Will buy IC next month so can pos to my hearts content next month :-)

Manda - thinking of you with the date approaching. Mine was Christmas day so not likely to forget it :-(

Think that is everyone Baby, Cuttle etc hope you are all ok?

Only 4 hours left to work this week then it is the weekend. I am off to have my cards read tonight. I take it with a pinch of salt. She has got some stuff Right. Last time she saw I was Pg before I knew and she also saw a sad loss in the summer (MC)???? As I say I don't read to much into it all.

And you can keep your rhubarb crumble I will have the left over custard with the skin on top :-)