Fantastic 40+ thread - part 4

It's gone very quiet here. We're off on holidays Tuesday for 10 days so won't be around for a while. I hope you'll all be here when I get back. We're going to France, first time abroad with the kids. Should be nice.

panashe glad you're scan went as good as can be expected.

Glad you gum got a thorough result from the tests. It sounds positive overall.

curlyI'm aghast at your company that's unbelievable in this day and age.

Ah Shandy well the upside is d&v appeared today and not on your birthday.
Is that summer over with then as it's pouring with rain here?
No don't work for nhs, work for a professional co that unfortunately doesn't have a professional hr dept! When I had my mc, she asked very personal questions and I felt like a rabbit caught in the headlights, and you can guarantee that whatever is discussed within those four walls my boss will be blabbing to a select few.
Got to run have physio and a few errands to run, put my shades away and best get my wellies on...............

Thank you all for my birthday greetings. I had a lovely day yesterday thanks, nice company, kids entertained and cake.

But down with the d&v virus today. I thought they were pg symptoms first thing but alas no.

Glad hippy is on the radar. Step down search and rescue team.

Glad you've made your decision curly and best of luck. Agree with others just say you're having a gynae procedure and if anyone is rude enough to ask more just say it's not really something you want to talk about. That's what I did after mc but told some. Do you work for the Nhs as that msg make it more tricky?

I'm right there with you Angel - feckin' hot! Phooey :( I keep wanting to put my feet in a bowl of cold water to try and cool off - not really the done thing at work, and probably a bit dangerous with electricity and stuff LOL!

Glad to hear you got through it all ok Panashe. And at least the midwife had something nice and positive to say :)

Hi Jolls lovely to see u. You ve been busy sorry your cycles are messed up. Xx
Panashe glad scan wasn t too bad xx
I know I m repeating myself but it's to hot for work OMG makes it's so sweaty
It's horrid, but home now off for the world s longest shower!!! Xxx
Love to all xx

I mean they see many pregnant ladies over 40+ who go on to have healthy babies

Hello Jolls good to hear from you

My scan went ok , well as good as it could do under the circumstances. My lining back to normal and womb empty. So the worse is over. Was hard but easier than last time, I think because I had got over the worse few days at home. The midwife asked if me and dp had any children together, not sure if she was suggesting my eggs don't like his sperm or vice versa. She said I'm sure you know the statistics re mc regardless of age but reiterated what we all know that they see many pregnant ladies over 40+

I already love you guys. I read through the entire thread before I joined, so sort of feel like I know you already (in a totally non-stalker way, I assure you! :o) You seem like such a nice bunch of caring folk, who also haven't had a sense of humour bypass.

Bloomin' sweaty hot here again, and I'm not even upzeeduff! I hate this kind of weather. My brother lives out in Thailand and has done for the past 8 years and I swear I have no idea how he copes with it.

Not surprised Hippy is loving the Isle of Wight. I've been there on hols a couple of times and it's gorgeous.

Good luck with the trawling Gum. Let us know if you find out anything helpful :)

Hi all
sorry been AWOL for ages, lurked a bit, but have missed loads too. So sorry to hear of all those having a hard time, but so heartening that we have some snug babes doing so well.

I've been busy IRL moving house again (into a building site) and working hard with DS and his language which I'm delighted to say is coming on amazingly well - in fact we've been "discharged" from speech therapy clinic, though we're going to continue contact with SALT once he's at pre-school next month.

I just had a late period again - didn't test so don't know if another CP. But am thoroughly pissed off with it all, and am struggling with the thought of keeping going. I know some of you will recognise that. But I also know I don't have the luxury to postpone any of this - it is now or never. I know that will also be a prominent thought with some of you too :(

Anyway, I just wanted to say hi, and I do hope we all get the happiest ending possible to this difficult quest we're on. I'm going to pop off again for a bit, as regular MNing is not very healthy for me at the moment, but I promise I will come back and see how you are all getting on.

Much love to you all x

Penashe - thinking of you. It's just such a heart-breaking thing to go through.
Let us know how it goes.

Curly - glad you have made a decision (a good one I think). I don't think you need to give details to your boss. Just telling him/her that it is gynae related should be enough.

Desperate - sometimes this thread does move fast - but you'll get used to it, and you'll love it(and us).

I wonder where 100000fireflies went? We have quite a few of our group go AWOL....

I'm so pleased to hear that Hippy is loving the IOW. I have facebook, but have no idea how to friend people when I don't know their real names. But it's probably how many people would like to keep it. If anyone wants to friend me, just PM me on mumsnet. I'm not very good at facebook. I really only have it to keep an eye on what my kids are up to! Sometimes it is the only way we can get in touch with our 20 year old son.

Right - must go and trawl the internet about all this new medical knowledge about myself... What? Me? Obsessed? Never.

Angel - it's rained? Not here it hasn't! Desperately wish it would because it's so damned muggy :(

If man gets cold feet and I get pregnant, then I'll just have to be a single mother. Although, quite frankly, I don't want to lose the person who has turned out to be the love of me life! He'll probably man up. I think kids scare him shitless - he's 6'4" and hoiks trees around for a living - so I think he's afraid he's going to break them! :o

Diege - please feel free to cal me decrepit if you want to, I shan't mind :o I bloody feel it some mornings LOL. Thanks for the offer of advice, I may well take you up on it. Who knew bodies were so bloomin' complicated, eh?!

Hope everything goes ok Panashe. I can't imagine how awful it must feel.

x-posts Angel Weather here too hot too, though raining at same time . Agree, nights are the pits with our internal combi boilers

panashe hope everything goes ok in the morning. Even when you looking at scans with a view to getting the all clear/establishing what you know already, it can still be a stressful and upsetting experience xxx
Desperate you will find lots of man-advice on here and you'll find that your cold-feet story is not untypical! Quite a few of us chart on here so ask away if you need any advice

Happy birthday * Shandy x
Much love Pabashe sorry you feel crap x
Desperate hope you and parnter stay on the same track together ttc can make or break a relationship. X bloody he'll working for FREE no that's not something I would be doing!!!!
Hi Curly don t worry I m pacing myself. Glad you ve decided to go for the surgery think , at least, you ll feel pro active like you ve done something constructive.
Gum interesting test results your dr sounds very thorough.
Hi Isaboo long time no hear.
Hi all was " facebooked" by Hippy she's fine loving the Isle Of Wight sends her love and will be back to check in as soon as she has Internet acess again.
Love to all thank god it's rained hopefully it will cool down now. As Curly said this weathers lovely if you re off work but unfortunately I m not . In a stuffy clinic in a very hot uniform with my own internal radiator!!!
Oh, Diege eel .... Urh... Nice thought!!!! Xxx

Gum that was really interesting and I think it is great your doctor is so informative and supportive.

Curly I think you are making the right decision too.

I have a scan in the morning. My new doctor was very sweet and said he sees lots of ladies with bleeds and clots who still continue with pregnancy, but I think I just had a look of scepticism of my face. I just want to know my body is doing what it should be so I can get all clear.

Blimey! I can't keep up! :o

It's ok Angel. I'm working in the NHS too - though on the clerical side - in the cardiovascular units. They all do really well in difficult circumstances with very little funding - some of the support staff have either been paid late or not at all in recent months . I think the weird thing with giving birth is that I feel that as women have been doing it since the dawn of time then we should be able to do it without too much interference really. I have no idea when the dawn of time was but I have a friend of 19 who says I'm so old I was probably around when the tectonic plates were still shifting :o With friends like that, eh?

And that was an interesting post Gum, lots to think about and a lot of positives to take from that information for you :)

Started charting this month Curly for the first time after just sort of 'going for it'. Boyfriend having a serious case of the wobbles, but to be honest, this will either make or break our relationship. If it breaks it, it will be a big shame because he's a darling, but he IS a lot younger than me and despite having settled down a great deal since seeing me, I think he still feels he'd like the option to get bladdered of a weekend. I'm not quite sure why he thinks that wouldn't be possible as we would have an excellent support network...but there you go! Men! LOL :o

Hope you manage to have a great birthday Shandy. Thanks all for the welcome.

Hi Curly! Great that you've made the decision about surgery (fwiw I think it's the right one). Do you have to tell your boss exactly what you're having done? I know at my work we just tick a 'gynae' box for HR so don't have to disclose any details as such (though everyone gossips).
DD1's birthday was great thanks . We had a covered bouncy castle in the garden that wasn't quite the stress-free experience I'd imagined (air blower kept on coming detatched and castle deflating but we had it all day and dd1 had a ball.
Meant to say TTT what an inspirational birth story. I look at your blog frequently and Madeleine is so beautiful. You look lovely too
Yes Hippy the guards are going out tomorrow to search...missing you!

Happy Birthday Shandy have a great time regardless of when/how you celebrate it. Hope your dd is better soon. Panashe (((())))) and re dog flap, at least your ds didn't have to wake you up to let him in . Although I can imagine that dog flap will quite draughty come the winter. TTT love the name Madeleine and happy that you got the home birth you wanted. BB hope you and dh have smoothed things out. Angel exciting news re movements but look after yourself ok, don't overdo things. Diege how did your dd birthday party go? Desperate are you charting at all or just going for it so to speak? Hopefulgum very interesting reading and sounds like you have a great Dr. You are obviously very fertile and feel positive that with your next bfp it'll be a sticky. Hippy where are you? Surely there must be an internet cafe on the IOW if rental home has no broadband??
Ok I have decided to have the surgery to unblock my right tube. Am worrying about how to approach my boss and what to say without looking guilty as I'm going to be economical with the truth . Hoping to have the surgery next month but secretly hoping I'll get a bfp as have read that there is a "fertile window" after having a laparoscopy and won't need to go through with surgery.
Hope you're all enjoying the lovely weather, well those of you who are not at work like me x x

Hi Gum, no not a boring post at all - very interesting. So some posiitve news there with your results, and even the potentially worrying can - now you know - be discussed and hopefully treated. Were you able to get any feedback on possible chromosome issues with the mc?
Happy birthday Shandy!! Enjoy your day x
Panashe I know what you mean about waking in the morning after a mc - a truly horrible feeling . Thinking of you x
Angel that's great about movement - this one's like an eel, not much kicking but lots of wriggling.
Hello and welcome desperate! (I keep on wanting to write 'decrepid' now ).

All fine here, dds off for a trip with dh to the beach, ds in nursery, and the plan was that I would have a massive tidy-up and get some things listed on e-bay...but I am sooo tired...Must at least make a token effort!

Hi, just wanted to let you know about the doctor's visit.

But before I do, I have to say "Happy Birthday" Shandy! Hope it was a good one. Sorry to hear that dd2 hasn't been well.

I'm so glad I went in to speak to the doc, there was a lot to take in, and she kindly copied all the results and printed them for me.

The good news is that my ovaries are functioning beautifully - my FSH was 2, LH was 1, both really low, which is great for my age, and my progesterone at (what I thought was) 8 dpo was 35. All indicative that when the tests were done, I was in the luteal phase (God knows where bloody AF is then at 16 dpo- still hasn't shown her face). That progesterone level is apparently very good - normal is above 11. Perimenopausal is less than 3.

So I'm happy with that, but there was a few abnormal things that may or may not have cause miscarriage. My testosterone levels are low. I don't know much about it, but will do some research later. This in turn affects DHEA and so my Dr has prescribed DHEA - but only in homeopathic form. She says despite being a conventional doctor, she's seen it work in patients and feels DHEA full strength will mess with other hormones.

Also I have positive readings on something called "ANCA" which means I have an inflammatory response, to antibodies - in other words I have an autoimmune disease - but at this point it hasn't shown itself. Basically what that means is I may develop an auto-immune disease like Lupus, Diabetes, Celiac disease etc. I am not at all surprised as both my parents have auto-immune diseases. I have to really look after myself to try and keep whatever it is at bay. The main reason this is interesting is that an auto -immune disease can cause miscarriage.

So I'm still going to see the fertility specialist in September to discuss the test results. Maybe he'll have something to contribute. I think some women are treated with prednisolone to stop miscarriage if they have an auto-immune disease, but not all cases are treated like that.

Sorry - this is a really long boring post, but I thought it may help someone else in their quest to have a baby.

Happy Birthday Shandy August is the best birthday month

Hope your lo recovers so you can enjoy some of the day & of course celebrate tomorrow too ! xx

Hi all. Hi gum and panashe so sorry for your news. I remember that horrible feeling every morning the realisation that you're no longer pg. It takes me back to when my dad died.

On a brighter note. It's my birthday. Ye-eh I had got lots planned but now I have to take a trip to the docs as dd2 has a d&v bug lingering. But it's ok as I'll just have to celebrate two days now instead. The only other problem is I'm now older again, but as dh said only by one day the same as the rest of us. And being as he's younger too I thought that was so sweet of him.

hippy search and rescue are being called tomorrow if you don't show up.

Hi curly, bb hope you're taking a day at a time and that you and dh are sorting things out. Lovely birth story tank I hope it wasn't too traumatic, it sounds like you handled it beautifully despite everything.

Waves to everyone else.

Hi Angel it's great you are feeling some movements. I am lay in bed listening to the rain. I want sunshine !!!!!

Congratulations TTT So glad you got your home birth. What a beautiful name too

Hi desperateoldie67 and welcome. We are a mixed bag on here but really great support for each other & not just on tcc front.

Gum I hope you got to the doctors ok, it will be interesting to hear what they say but hope it isn't too upsetting for you.

I'm ok(ish), still losing a lot of blood & feeling weak so glad it is the summer holidays. Will probably go for scan beginning of next week & hopefully will only have to go once then.

This house we've moved to has a dog flap on the side door at the back. Not that my dog is bright enough to use it despite kids trying to get him in and out by tempting him with treats. But 19 year old ds managed to get through it on Friday night when he had lost his key after a night out

Waking in the morning is crap though & thinking Yes I'm not pregnant anymore

Desperate there are also brilliant staff working oin the NHS and some doctors, nurses and midwives are fabulous. Like in any profession theres good and bad and ad someone working in the NHS I m afraid
most of the problems come from too many people using the service sometimes not for approriate reasons and not enough funds going in to it!!! X
Hi all not posting much as knacked work mega busy, way too hot too many long days. GILS fine feeling movement now, not kicking but never did with Georgie but flutters and ." farty" movements!!!! Xx
Is Hippy still AWOL in the Isle of Wight???? Love to all xcx