Fantastic 40+ thread - part 4

Morning! Thaks Alba, good to hear from you
pocket, I'm sure people wouldn't judge, but if they do (and it becomes apparent from their tone/choice of words etc) I think you just have to develop a thick skin unfortuantely. Or maybe the mumsnet stock phrase 'That sounded really rude...did you mean it to sound so rude??' . I get comments (when I have the 4 dcs with me) everytime I go out, sometimes - though rarely - complimentary (wow, that's amazing that you're having no.5) but usually of the 'local freak' variety. I think you just have to focus on what being pregnant means to you, and acknowledge that if you did everything in the shadow of what people might (or might not!) think you would have lots of regrets.
Hi Angel. Bet if feels great to finally be away from work, although I totally acknowledge the poignancy of your situation. I hope all goes well for you on Monday and that you are able to have a peaceful day xxx
Ok here - pelvis better than it was yesterday, and hoping to get some houework -related stuff done today. Parents over for a rare visit which should be nice though you never can tell with them
Love to all xxx

Hi alba hope you re well? Many thanks for your thoughts & kind wishes.. Yes, I m very emotional will be glad when Monday is here. Xxx
Pocket you do ponder a lot don t you? Mmm... No advice apart from take everything 1 day at a time. Xx

Hi everyone

Question for you; i'm not even pregnant yet but I'm imagining what it will be like to tell people if and when i am. and i'm wondering if i'll be judged as an older mum (i'm 44 and going for donor egg). any thoughts? what if someone asks 'wow, was it planned?' i dont know what i'd say if there is even the hint of 'blimey, i thought you were too old'

i know months away but i'm getting my knickers in a twist already...

Any thoughts greatefully appreciated

AngelGeorgie, thought I might still find you here, I just wanted to tell you I'm thinking of you with the 10th coming up, and with your delivery date getting so close. I can't imagine how anxious you must feel, and wish I could help make it easier, but please know you're in my thoughts xx

I shall be lurking for happy news from you and from Diege

Thanks Hippy . on Monday we re going to Georgie's special place with some flowers and then out for lunch.
Just finished work had a lovely under stated day. Fish & chips then a quiet finish. Only in tears once so haven t done bad. Trying not to focus too much on leaving work. Xxx

Panashe you poor thing, what a dilemma. its hard to offer any advice - for what its worth if you've been happy with your dp and you think you plus baby could be a happy family, it may be worth trying to hang on to that. i wish you lots of luck in your decision, and if you need a shoulder to cry on, i've got two. x

Angel have you only got one day at work left? Lucky you - bambino will be here very soon.

Italian i'm sure embies are nestling in - its too darned cold and windy outside so they'll be snug and warm where they are.

hello to everyone else xxx

Panashe thanks. Don t know how you are going to come to any decision. Hope you ve got some RL support to help. Take care xxx
Diege hope you re ok? X
Italian thanks xxxx hope the time is passing by quickly for you.
Hippy once again your posting is absolutely lovely . Your words made me cry , for all the right reasons. You are so lovely I truly hope you get your take home baby. Your words engulfed me in nice cuddly blanket. Thanks a million xxxxxxx
Nice day just chilling. My lovely manager told me to take the day off to rest which I m doing.
Love to all xxxx

Morning

Just wanted to send some hugs to angel, thinking about you lots xx

Also Italian I want to send lots of good luck and positive vibes your way. I'm overeating, think it can be a distraction from things....

Thanks Diege and Hippy for your wise words. I just feel at a crossroads and it is the worse feeling in the world but I know my family and friends would be more than happy if I told ex to f**k off and leave me alone. He had plenty of chances with me but the fact that I am in this dilemma says enough about how I feel about him. Dp knows all that is going on and has gone to stay at his friends.

So I am potentially single and pregnant..and I think because of all pregnancy hormones I cannot think straight about anything.

My life fees like an episode of Eastenders at the moment.

p.s. I pronouce Diege De-age

Thinking of you angelgeorgie. Try not to worry. Not long now, honey.

I feel like my eating is going mad! I am eating so much. Today I had beans on toast for breakfast, eggs on toast for lunch, chilli for dinner plus I've eaten sweets, 2 bags of wotsits, a biscuit and a chocolate bar. Think I am eating to distract myself from the treatment!

It's not going to go wrong Angel, it's going to go very right. You've done so well to have kept it together for so long, and a wobble here and there is entirely to be expected. Sleep well and try your best to relax xxx

Thanks Diege & Italian a rather scary day and I ve felt worried tonight that GILS ISn t moving as much. However, neither Georgie or GiILS moved/ move a huge amount at the best of times. She has just started to liven up now.her heartbeat is fine on my Doppler just so want her here now . Hope I m back to my calm state tomorrow as if I remain in this heightened state of anxiety it's going to be a long 12 days.I seem to have got stuck at the stage that feels like gloom& doom that it's all going to go wrong again.

Phew, yes breath and relax Angel!!! I also found the monitoring nervewracking, and don't want to have it done again in a hurry! Good for you on getting things checked out though. I really can't beleive you will have had your baby by this time in 2 weeks!
Italian I see totally where you are coming from about the security of the frosties and the comparatively insecurity of the babies inside you. Thinking of you often and praying for a good outcome xxx
Hippy thinking of you on the ttc front; I really hope that these next few months prove fruitful. You MUST keep positive xx Well done for ds too - that's such a great start in a new school for him
ON the 'instead cup' I of course with my filthy mind though 'instead of a willy' , though of course you're not exactly going to have one of those in you for long after dtd...wouldn't 'inside cup' have been better??
lol going with the flow sounds good, and is usually underrated. ON the pronounciation front, 'Diege' comes from a nickname an old work colleague gave me (work initials are 'DJ' and relates to that old Roseanne sitcom where her son (DJ) is called 'diege' (pronounced 'Deej'). When I met up with some Mnetters a few years ago they went all exotic and had been thinking of it as 'Dieg-e' (as in Diego) and probably expected some sultry Latin beauty . Well you did ask!
Panashe hmm,I'd be tempted to give the old ex the cold shoulder. Seems like he's back on his own terms, and is relying on the attraction you once had. Could it be that the thought is better than what the reality would be?? PLus of course he's had the snip!!!!!!! We can't be having snipped men in the snug you know . Seriously though, it does sound a horrible dilemma .
Have finally finished big work report that will certainly help my replacement at work (when that happens). Just 2 more little ones that are eating away at my conscience then I can finally rest and turn my attention to hosptial bag!

Angelgeorgie very glad all is OK, thinking of you. i am sure if I ever get to the positive test stage I will absolutely spend the following 9 months on hot bricks!

Oh Panshe you dear girl, what a muddle. For once I have no pearl of wisdom. Thinking of you.

He he hippy !!! instead of tampax??? Makes sense!!!
Panashe Gosh your life sounds incredibly complicated.congrats on the pregnancy. What will you do about the man situation??? Rather you than me!!!
Italian I think Hippys idea is a brill one hibernate for 12 days mmm.. Think I ll join you. !!
Had a bit of a stressful morning like a idiot dipped my wee at work showed ; leuocytes, glucose, protein & ketones . Checked my bp was raised so of course I panicked about pre- eclampsia. Off I trot to the day unit, they dipped my wee ; nothing exciting in, bp ok but would GILS perform for a trace... No of course not!!!! Found her heart beat but didn t meet the " criteria" to be discharged. Off we trot for some lunch then back to have tracer repeated!!! Finally our GILS ok heartbeat loud & proud & enough sleepy/ awake periods to be discharged. This pg will kill me!!! The Midwive was lovely apart from when made the quip about " should I have attended in my uniform" as I replied getting changed was the last thing on my mind!!!
Phew now breathe & relax Louise!!! Love to all xxx

Hello and lots of love to everyone

I have been reading every day but unable to post. I'm in a mess ...

You may recall I mentioned a previous relationship with a man who had had a vasectomy. He was the love of my life, I never loved anyone like him but he wouldn't commit and after two years we split. I was heartbroken and never stopped loving him. Met my new partner and all the pain went away. Ex dp has been in contact, wants to marry me and all feelings have come back to surface and I've never felt in such a upset mess in my whole life. And I'm 5 weeks pregnant ! Am sat in tears now because I'm angry, upset, frustrated.

Anyway just wanted to give you all an update. Have missed you and am looking forward to reading Angel and Dieges good news soon.

xxx

Totally confused about all this cups talk!

Hope everyone is hanging on in there!

I have no idea how Paschal and Cielo are, I keep swinging between total optimism and total ignorance! I now know why I am so fixated on the frozen embies! Because I've never had frosties before, and because they are safe, and the ones in me are not, they might stick around or they might not. My one experience of IVF last year resulted in them not staying around so I have worked out that that is why I am finding it hard to 'invest' in them, because I am fearful they will not stick around. I had some heavy boob feelings but now they just feel normal. This is so frustrating!

Evening all

Hippy Sorry about your clomid saga. Dont listen to that voice in your head - do what your heart is telling you if that makes you happy :) I loved your Time Travellers Wife quote - such a lovely book.

Angel hope youre last few days at work fly by - love your 'ready to pop' story btw.

Hi to everyone

xxx

" instead cups" instead of what??? What a bizarre name??? The mind boggles!!!
Hippy indeed my friends are dorks at time!!! However meant to say work colleagues!!!
*LOL" painters in??? Thought you meant AF to you actually explained the decorators!!! I am still at work on " light " duties. Just admin, sending out results etc... Not actually seeing any patients. Finish Friday.
Like LOL said love to all MIA ; curly, Fireflies ,Panashe,BB & everyone else. Xxxxx

Have a great holiday Gum The pregnant oldies, btw, all conceived naturally.

Hippy, I'm just going to go with the flow - if we're not using contraception and not worrying about conceiving we've got a really good chance of having a nice surprise. Thanks Hippy and Gum for the great quotes. Will google the cup thing. Sounds vile, but can't be as bad as watching your hair fall out.

Lou please tell me you're not still at work? Or was is 'dork'? Much more appropriate, probably

Diege how to you pronounce diege? Just wondered...hope your blood pressure's at a nice steady jog and not bursting out of your trackies.

Work is manic - miss dp, who's working hard and so tired he can't even stay awake to swi (so we do it in his sleep ). The painters are in - mess everywhere, but will look lovely in a week or so.

Missing you Curly Panashe and Fireflies. Are you all ok? BB how are you feeling?

Right - if you want some chilli pork, I'm dishing up right now.