so here it is, a new home for us newly updiffed ladies or still seeking that golden egg after a mc part 3

wombat and yellow by DH being off work I mean so he can be here for DC's, not so he can tag along!

Hi Ladies
Yes marathon this is the beginiing of the mentalling stage for you I am afraid, I will try to summon up some sicky vibes and send your way, just enough for re-assurance. My first symptom was sore boobs, I think the sickness began at 5+4 ish. Are you officially late now?

purple your DD is on my birthday! Sending you the same sick vibes!

yellow a few sips of Fizz hey? living on the edge indeed!, I had half a pint of cobra with our anniversary indian meal at the weekend, and felt quite naughty. DH said that's probably the last you will be able to buy before people start to give you dirty looks, as I am showing at a terrific rate!

Good that you are on your way over to blighty wombat if we are going to meet up we need to get our heads together and discuss details as I will need to book the train. I have never had a blind date before Ha! yellow you being the city gal, can you suss out somewhere for us to lunch? I am hoping DH is off that day, so I may be able to pull in a bit of shopping too!

mrsb if you are lurking I hope you are ok, any news back yet on the tests?

sparkly I love those names too, My DC's are going mad suggesting names, and I think we have already agreed on a girl's name that all 4 of us like, my very favorite has been veto'ed and I have gone off it a bit now I have seen how far up the top 100 it is. I am a bit daft about not liking there to be another child with the same name in kids class, I don't like the whole child1 child2/ big child little child scenario.
It's way to soon to have chosen a name anyway! plus I am feeling like this is a boy so won't get to use it anyway...

No sickness now for a few days, cue mentaling, I have ordered a doppler, well hired one, so hoping that will ease the worry until I start to feel movement. Oh I nearly forgot. wombat I had thought I was feeling movement, but didn't like to say as you are so far ahead of me, well anyway, I could feel it while I was being scanned, but the baby was very much asleep! so it was just wind Ha

Waves to wellie harassed star and anyone else I may have missed!

Hi all and sorry for not posting for a while - cannot believe how manic it has been moving house, tidying up work before hols and trying to pack for 10 days in the UK when you have no idea what the weather is like and you have nothing to wear cue last minute emergency shopping! Just about there now and taking advantage of the internet in the biz class lounge before my flight (upgraded on points) - not sure how many people here would be logging on to mumsnet!

Sorry to hear about the bfn after bfp marathon - it's really tough - thinking of you.

Good to see that you're hanging in there purple - one day at a time....

sparkly - I know I've said it before, but you really should think about some creative writing - you are toooooo funny - love the Tea n Tits. Have you considered a blog....? I love Hugo and Melody and every Mel I've ever known has been lovely and my first love was a Hugo! Am concerned about your Chris Evans thing though....

Can't really help with the nuchal thing yellow other than when we got the whole lot done and got a low risk, it meant we didn't have the difficult choice of whether to go for cvs / amnio etc. and while we know there is still a chance of abnormalities, our worries on this have lessened dramatically since the nuchal and bloods.

Good to hear the sickness has reduced worm - feeling more normal now?

And how are you doing star, wellie, harassed, mrsb? Hope all is well and your new colleagues are nice wellie.

Likely to be quite sporadic over the next week or so but will try and log on and see how you're all going when I get 5 mins. Got to get on the flight in a mo so waving madly to all and rather excited I'm going to be in the same country as you all finally! xx

MarathonMama, I think it is about the 10th March and I have had no symptoms today which is really worrying! However I have spent the past two days taking it easy and my main symptom has been being exhausted.
I am counting each day off and really hoping that I am sick soon. I know how you feel though I am exactly the same, when I got my decent positive I cried my eyes out as I couldn't cope with another mc.
However, I am on the first step on the having a baby ladder and I haven't bled or have anything else happen that would suggest it has gone wrong. So I am being hopeful and following some steps to reduce miscarriage this one says eat chocolate and I think grapes & cherries which have a special enzyme or something which is something I am now doing Also I am taking a plain folic acid tab and a pregnacare together everyday with permission from GP as extra folic acid also helps. I am on this thread if you wanted a more one on one chat?

Hello marathon sorry Monday's are v hectic for me. Hurrah for the bfp, I think that I def felt the way you do and still do to a certain extent. I didn't get any symptoms until at least 5 weeks and even though I feel sick most of the time if I feel well for a few hours I still panic.

I think it is totally normal to feel as you do, esp after a mc. I'll be here to hold hands with you, just try to take one day at a time. It is a cliche but what else can you do?

Big hug and chin up

Where and how are the rest of you lovely ladies?

Has everyone gone somewhere and not told me?

Hello ladies, typing in a bit of a hurry so sorry for mistakes.

Well, it's official, got a BFP with a Boots cheapie in the afternoon so am now mentalling like mad. Have been feeling down, not convinced my body's ready for this and just waiting for it to go wrong

No symptoms at all

Did the rest of you feel like this?

Purple my dd is 17th March I think. What about you?

Thanks for the info worm that nuchal is low. I think in 3 days I will be contacted if high risk so I can decide on further tests. The detailed scan sounds worth exploring. I think we are about the same age so my risk is also already higher. It is what I am worrying about most right now. Those days after the test will be so stressful. The worry never ends does it?

Sorry to be all about me and depressing. Hurrah for the weekend and I've finished my essay. I also had a couple of sips of fizz last night, living on the edge!

Morning yellow I had the nuchal stuff, but they said to me it would be 3 weeks either way, a couple of days earlier if high risk as they ring you rather than send a letter. Wish it was 3 days, she did say something about there is a rapid test that just checks for downs within 3 days, but all the other chromosomal things take longer to show up on the tests. I am not expecting anything until I am 16 weeks. While we are on the subject though, if I did come back high risk I have been looking into more advanced scans that you can have where they check out the nasel bone and other markers before having the evasive testing. The nation M/C rate for amnio in 1 in 100, but our local rate is 1 in 250, which is encouraging. I am already 1 in 400 just on age apparently. Lets just hope it all comes back good for us. My nuchal fold was really low 1.35mm i think which is well within the low end.
Glad you are feeling better today, I havnt been sick yet either :) have a nice weekend girls x

Hello people

Am feeling quite good today after sleeping so much. Am going to try and find some new trousers today as I cannot fit into any of my trousers or jeans.

Exciting for the car sparkly we don't have one either and I haven't driven for about 20 years either, I think I would need to take lessons again.

Thinking about the whole breastfeeding thing makes me nervous so I think ill leave worrying about that for later.

Those who have had the 12 week scan did you have the nuchal thing? Apparently the do the neck measurement and a blood test and if you are high risk they call you in 3 days and if you are low send a letter within 2 weeks. I think that will be a very stressful wait.

PMSL at tea and tits!! sparkly if I lived in Islington I would nab that idea and make a million! On the funny names, I was reading on another thread a lady who's surname is Bull, wanting to call DS Edward. I have no idea how you cope without a car, you will llove having one again.

Well it's a beautiful day , which will be spent catching up on ironing here........rock and roll!

Haha. Good luck Manchester [hwink]. Given your Chris Evans fetish sparkly, is now a bad time to reveal that DH is of the red headed variety? [hgrin] hehe. I've always had a bit of a ginger fetish come to think of it......

[hgrin] at 'breast-feeding cafes! "Tea 'N' Tits' open for business! I think I probably just don't look out for that sort of thing in cafes, but one has opened up near us that is clearly aimed at mums who eat cake, so perhaps this is the sort of place I should frequent - it's lovely, where I had my buzzy cappucino last weekend. Purple you sound great, fancy doing some training to help others - such actions are incomprehensible but sp admirable to a lazy, antisocial sloth such as myself!
Had a lovely day, been with the parents who were all chilled out and giggly, and I bought a car! Just thought I'd drop that in, like yah! We don't have one and we need one to visit John Lewis relatives, I feel increasinlgy out of the loop without one - it's a 2nd hand Nissan Micra (nowt fancy like), we get it next weekend. Quite excited even though I am so not a car person and have only driven about 5 times since passing my test 20 years ago! Might need a refresher, anyone thinking of venturing out next Saturday stay clear of the Manchester area!

Parents think Hugo or Melody are the current favourite names, quite like them - Melody in particular. Did anyone read the thread where the couple loved the name Isobel and asked for suggestions on a middle name, and a family member suggested 'End'? Made me giggle lots, though they were rather less impressed. Never divulge your name choices!
Wormy, it is quite a sexy weekend! [hgrin] Had a great dream about Chris Evans the other morning, now have a weird crush.
Hi to all

Hi, everyone, I am feeling ok, still hanging in here I am 5 weeks today by my best guess so that is one landmark ticked off!
My boss knows (so glad I told her when someone brought their child in with chicken pox ffs), DH knows and one of my friends.
I should be having an early scan, my gp sent a request card anyway and I think if all is well there then we may tell some family after that. I am also really hormonal/grumpy and tired and my boobs are so sore so I am feeling optimistic at the moment.

Marathonmama, with my chemical pregnancy, I was late, so took a test and got a faint positive and then got my period a couple of days later. Also I did post once on the March thread but I don't think I will post again as it isn't my 'vibe' at the moment. Sounds hopeful your end, when would you be due?

Everyone who is thinking of breastfeeding, it is one of things that isn't always easy at the beginning but it is definitely worth sticking with. I would definitely advise knowing about any local bf cafes or groups in your local area, I found these invaluable, so much so that I have taken breastfeeding peer support training to help other mums and hope to take some more soon as well :)

Yellow that gives me some hope, and congratulations!

Thanks everyone, I already feel a bit better, there is nothing worse than thinking you are all alone!

Thank you everyone for the lovely messages. I am so happy, I know I'm not in the clear yet but haven't made it this far before.......

I managed to get out of the group booking in thing by going directly to the ante-natal clinic at the hospital and explaining the problem. So I now have an individual appt at 9am on Thursday.......hurrah.

You're all way ahead of me thinking about breastfeeding. My vague thoughts were that I'd give it a go and if it doesn't work I'll give up. At the moment, decisions like that seem so remote but I guess I'll get to them nearer the time.

Poor you feeling sick worm hope you managed to get some sleep.

I'm off to eat a croissant..........feel vaguely sick but thought that might help!

Hi purple and welcome :). How are you feeling? Does anyone in real life know yet??

worm, do you know what, i think i was that traumatised by DS's birth that i couldn't think of anything worse than breastfeeding him straight away . I know that sounds real bad when i say it out loud but it was a difficult one and i don't think i was prepared for it. Maybe my age as well as i had only turned 21 a couple of weeks before i had him. With DD, i thought i'd see how i feel and was ok and we both took to it really easily. No problems at all with milk supply and apart from the first week, she fed like DS did on a bottle, no more frequently than he did. We stopped at about 8 weeks as she got thrush in her mouth which the doctor failed to diagnose and treat, so a week later my nips were a mess with it and it was so painful and feeding became a nightmare cos i had to do it just for a short while at a time and then have a rest. With having DS as well, it wasn't practical for me to wait 2 weeks or so for the treatment to begin so i switched to a bottle. This time i think i'll at least start with the boob, providing this pregnancy progresses as normal, and see how i go. The one thing i found difficult was how big my boobs were. I felt a bit of a freak to be honest and was paranoid everyone was staring, but that was the only negative for me.

Can't believe the kids woke me up an hour earlier than when i've had to wake them all week. Was sooo looking forward to a lie in this morning. Sod's law.

Have a good weekend everyone. [hgrin]

Can I just say sparkly, I found breastfeeding v hard at first. Dd fed for an hour, 30 mins on each side, every 3 hrs (so only two hours in between!). By the time we got to the end of breastfeeding I loved ir though. It was so much easier than bottles and as dd was less cuddly, it gave us some quality cuddle time. The feeding got much quicker over time and there was longer between feeds.
It was so bad at first I wanted to stop at 6 weeks but was persuaded to persevere and am so glad I did, I ended up stopping at 12 months. I did do a bottle feed for the 'dream feed' though so that DH could do it, I'm sure bf police would have something to say about that!

Big love on the scan yellow great news have a nice weekend in bed getting rested up if you can.

Deep breaths marathon I didn't get a bfp for ages with my DS, like over a week late as well! and he is very much here! I know what you mean about the term chemical pregnancy, they seem to be a relatively new thing that people only know happen as the tests are so very sensitive now. In the past people would have never known they had a fertilised egg.

The only way I got through the early pg mentaling was to deny it to myself, I got myself in the mindset that I was only a little bit pg at first, which sounds ridiculous I know but it really helped me until the symptoms kicked in.
Think positive this one will be a sticky one!

I too have found myself reading up about breastfeeding sparkly and wombat and am getting stressed too, when I had DC's I hadn't made up my mind how I was going to feed, there were no sermons about it then like there are now! and when the time came they just asked " how are you going to feed" to which I shrugged a bit then they produced a bottle. I didn't knock it back having had been in labour for 27 hours ending in a section!! but if they had said would you like some help learning to breastfeed I would have had a go. I am going to have a go succeed to earth mother status this time!!

Hope you are feeling a bit better harrased, I have huge stresses from my parents with their seperate "issues" and I know distance myself a bit emotionally, putting all my time into MY family (ie dh and kids) the saying you can choose your friends but not your family certainly rings true to me!

Good luck with the new contract wellie hope it keeps your mind off the swi mentalling.

Sorry about the massive post, but it is now 0453 and I have been awake since 3AM , decided to get up after tossing and turning for an hour, and feeling sick. Have chucked and had a and am now going to try to get back to sleep on the sofa. I have 10 episodes of 4 in a bed to get through which should help!

Hope you lovely ladies all have a restful/sex filled weekend x

Hello ladies! Messaging from my phone so hope you don't mind me missing out the little stars to make it bold, they're such a faff.

Harassed - sorry to hear you're down, hope you're feeling better soon. I've had counselling and although it was hard (the hardest bit was getting the courage to go in the first place) I really found it helpful for making things seem less hopeless and clarifying what was making me so down. It might be worth a try.

Yellow - nice work on the scan

Purple -welcome! We could (hopefully) be in similar situations.

Well, no news here. I POAS this morning using a Tesco cheapie and it was BFP! Then this afternoon I finally managed to get to Boots and POAS with their cheapie and it was BFN! Arrrgh! All the tests have been BFP apart from the Boots one which is the brand I used to test after the erpc. I won't be happy till I've seen it on a Boots test, especially as I've had no symptoms.

Purple - I too will be avoiding the March thread if this is a BFP.

I keep seeing the term ' chemical pregnancy', haven't heard of one before ad have read about it 3 times today. Now convinced it will happen as I kept reading about mmc in the days leading up to mine.

It's all so frustrating!

Aw yellow - I'm made up for you - wonderful, wonderful news! Has it made the sickness any more bearable?! Great that you got an indiv booking in appt too. How did you manage it? Hope you get lots of lovely rest this weekend.

Really sorry to hear what a tough time you're having at the moment harassed - I think just one of the things you're having to deal with is enough right now and it's no surprise that you're feeling overwhelmed. I had counselling post m/c2 and definitely felt better for it. We touched on other things as well as the m/cs which I hadn't realised quite how much were bothering me - I felt better each time I left her. I'd definitely recommend it as apart from anything else it feels wonderful to have someone just listen for an hour with no interruptions, no advice, no annoying questions (only ones designed to help you) and no hidden agendas.

Agh - is that stuff about b/feeding really true sparkly?! I also had visions like yours (minus roaring fire) and they're tumbling down around my ears! Yes, we made it v clear to the sonographer that we didn't want to know the sex. WE are fully expecting a boy as DH is one of 3 boys and he has 3 sons from previous marriage! Would dearly love a pink bundle though.

Welcome purple and congrats on your bfp - you'll find lots of good support here (we have a lovely mix of expecting and ttc-ing) and also on the freak out room thread under conception - you'll fit right in as there is a lady there called purpletoes!

Waves to all from re-arranged (again) sofa - we suddenly realised we had planned everything around grown ups and no space for bub - oops!

Yay for great scan yellow!! :) So exciting!

harassed big hugs to you, so sorry things are rough at the mo, I have had counselling in the past and found it really helpful, have been considering post mc counselling but not decided yet xx

waves to everyone else! Sorry I've not been around, finished up at work today, hitting the ground running and starting the new one on Monday - will try to be around more once I get started. Hopefully it will take my mind off ttc and our SWI this month can be disguised as just having fun and not being completely obsessed!

Hurrah Yellow, great news! Really pleased and slightly emotional for you.
Can't stop but lots of hugs to Harassed, sorry you're having such a time of it at the moment. Can you have a proper heart to heart with dh about how you are feeling? x

All good, measuring exactly right fir dates. I burst into tears! So relieved, feel drained. Managed to arrange an individual booking in appt for next thurs then 12 week scan on tues 19th. Could do with a lie down.

harassed so sorry you are having a tough time, big hug from me. I have been having counselling for years, really helps me. Will read other thread later, families can be so difficult sometimes.

yellow good luck for today!! The sickness is a fab sign, I've been sicker with this one than the last two that mc'd.

Wombat brilliant news on the scan!! Glad the move is going well, I hate it too... such a faff.

sparkly I'm getting that too. Due the 22nd and lots of "ooh wouldn't it be lovely if it came on Christmas Day". No it bloody wouldn't! Poor baby! Then closely followed by is it a girl or boy and we going to call it Holly/Carol/Noel. Ummm, no I don't think so. Then they move on to how big my bump is!

Worm I can't remember what mine is!! Doh!! Some of the ladies on the Freak Out thread have the Hi Bebe one which is meant to be very good.

Purple welcome! Sorry you have to be here, but we all seem to doing ok at the moment. Long may the luck continue!!

I'm having a bit of a tough time at the moment. I think it's a combination of things: my first dd is fast approaching, my best friend is due the week before I would have been, dh is never bloody home (was out 5 nights a week and now it's going to be 7 up til his fight), dd had a massive tantrum,having probs with my mother this is my thread here, plus work isn't great. They're def not happy about me being preg and I've no idea what's going on.

So it all resulted in me falling to bits last night. Lots of tears as I hurt my tummy whilst trying to get tantrumming dd up to her bedroom and then I panicked. Closely followed by a huge arguement with dh....... so feeling a bit shell shocked and sad today. Don't really know what to do to make myself feel better. Did anyone have any post-mc counselling??