so here it is, a new home for us newly updiffed ladies or still seeking that golden egg after a mc part 3

Thanks for the fruity loaf yellow - not that there's much left after someone's efforts Easy for me to say, I know, but please don't worry about not feeling ready to buy stuff. Even now, I find it a bit odd - almost as if I'm pretending.... Some good advice I got is that don't feel as if you have to buy everything all at once and with shops being open 7 days a week, if you have missed anything, it's v easy to go and get what you need. We have bought sa couple of blankets and sheets and a grobag (partly cos it was cute and on sale) but not a swaddling thing yet- I figure I could try and swaddle in a normal blanket first and if that seems to be popular with junior, I'll get the proper thing. Good question re: the changing mat and cover - I have bought only one cover so far and will prob use muslins as per sparkly's v clever suggestion.

Glad you have ditched your canopy sparkly - I shall do the same with mine (well, put it away before I sell it to the next sucker person who may want it) - I don't envisage taking junior out in the sun in the basket and even if I did, I'd put the whole thing in the shade..... interesting what you said about the cat - it is one of my concerns - I think I will be doing my best to ensure that neither cat nor dog are left alone with him - easier said than done of course.....

Sorry to read you guys are struggling with work - easy for me to say, but I really would recommend leaving as early as is feasible - no-one's going to give you a medal for struggling in every day...... I am finding it very nice, although I do struggle a bit with the lack of structure that work gives you.

Had a tour of the labour/delivery/postnatal ward this morning with v helpful midwife - tis rather plush - and felt much better for seeing it all. DH can stay over too on the couch in the postnatal room with me but I have a feeling he'll be delighted to get home for his last decent sleep!

I'm here eating all the fruity loaf Yellow!

So, another Monday
Seriously considered trying to leave work a week early over the weekend, I was like a zombie and couldn't really function, work totally wipes me out and is making me a little miserable. On the flip side, I've only 3 weeks left, and have a day off each week, plus who knows if in future I'll be working with these people, in this role, so should perhaps make the most of it and try to manage the stress. Yellow, work does get harder, it can seem a little insurmountable at times and has made me quite teary as I get larger and more lethargic. How you are coping ensuring the country's security I can only wonder....
Don't worry about buying things, sure the mums will be on with advice but I think you can start on the minimum. I think changing mat covers are for easy cleaning and also because babies don't like the feel of the plastic on little bots, but you could always use a muslin cloth (you have bought those haven't you?! ) I haven't bought a mat yet but might get a wedgie one from John Lewis, as if Monts is anything like DH he will be extremely clumsy and is highly likely to roll to the floor, and I'm not 100% confident in DH's catching abilities
Wombat, the moses basket canopy went straight in the recycling, I think it's for show although may afford some sun protection (?) but my basket was 2nd hand and the canopy looked a bit tatty. Not sure why I got one actually, I couldn't leave Monts in it unsupervised because a cat would be in there like a shot, just one of those things you feel you should have I suppose. I thought maybe he would prefer to sleep in there if I placed it in the cot, rather than straight into the cot which will seem vast to his little eyes. He'll soon let me know his preference I'm sure.
Nordic, welcome, come on soon and give us some background to how you've ended up with a surrogate, that's a new one on us! You could always start a thread, there must be other women in your position and you could probably do with more bespoke advice; at the very least though you won't go hungry here!
Wombat, think I'm with you on the birth plan, and anyway I don't think the midwifes of South Manchester will be giving them much credence anyway, they're pretty hard down to earth My mindset is to try for as natural as possible but remain closed to nothing if it's needed. I would like to try to create as calm an environment as possible, reading Ina I can well suspect my cervix clamping shut at the sight of a troop of trainee medics oggling the old fanjo; how much of a say I'll get is debatable, we have the hospital tour on Sunday so I should know more then. Harassed, very envious of your home birth, I'd love that but with the first I am just a little anxious about what to expect. Will you have a pool? Do you lay down plastic sheets on the bed? Tell, tell!

Morning all

worm sounds like the scan was lovely, I really like the pic you put on FB. In my hypno birting course one lady said she'd been told her baby was breech at 31 weeks and the teacher was quite scathing about that saying that the baby hasn't settled in any position by that stage. I think that there are some yoga positions that can help the baby turn as but her suggestions also included talking to the baby and asking it to turn as well at hypnosis! Lots of options....Would they really do a CS on boxing day? I feel so far behind....you lot are all rushing for the finish line and I'm not going to be ready until the end of Jan!

hello wombat wow that really is getting close isn't it? how are you adjusting to not working? i have no idea about that bit on the moses basket, I don't think we're even going to get one. Went to mothercare yesterday, I really didn't enjoy it. There is so much stuff and i don't know what I need. For eg changing mats....do you need to get one of those plastic things and a cover? And a wooden tray type thing? if you get a cover do you need more than one as they'll get covered in poo? and the whole swaddling, grow bag, sheets, bedding thing is v confusing indeed. And my friend recommended getting a sensor thing that tells you if they stop breathing.....but at mothercare he said they only work with 'cheap' mattresses as it goes under the mattress rather than under the sheet....so we just don't know what to do for the best......so have once again done nothing.... We're off to France for a week from Sunday so we can think about it when we get back!

harassed sorry you're still having crap/painfull days but the light is at the end of the tunnel. I think I just feel more pressure to buy stuff cos Xmas is looming and the shops will be even more stressful/busy than they currently are. I think I have an element of superstition too, don't really want to get anything until I have my actual baby in my arms....that might not be very practical though.

Started to feel quite stressed about work last week.....there just seems to be so much to do....trying not to let it get to me. I went out on thurs night last week, got home at 11.30pm and felt terrible the next day, a bit sick and emotional....just don't have the stamina anymore....

Welcome nordicmum sounds like quite a journey

mrsb33 how are you doing? feeling any better?

Hope you all had a good weekend. I'll just leave these danish pastries and lightly toasted fruit loaf with butter to see if I can tempt anyone out....sparkly where are you?

ooh - random question - for those of you who will use or have used moses baskets, are the annoying canopies there for any reason other than to annoy you? I really want to take the one I have off, but wondering if it does serve a purpose before I do so. Thanks!

Wow worm - your DH has done well not giving it away! Great that you are stumped though as it will keep it a surprise and also that sonographer not concerned about weight. Fingers crossed for turning - there are lots of websites I believe that offer tips on that.

Saw my ob/gyn for the routine 36 week appt today (well, actually 36+3) and all seems well - she said I had a lovely tummy ..... scanned again and wombatjunior was moving around quite a bit and for the first in all the many scans we seem to have had, I felt him move at the same time we saw him move on the screen which actually got me quite excited. He was blinking too which was very cute. I asked her if she wanted to see my birth plan before or on the day and she was quite firm that she doesn't have much time for them.... she said that the baby is the one with the plans, not her, me, the midwife or anyone else and it's best to stay open, but if there is something I feel very strongly about then to put that in. I have to say I do quite agree with her and have decided that DH and I will have an open plan but nothing in writing. She did say that she's recently had a couple of incidents where her patients asked her to sign off on their birth plans which seems a bit extreme to me - she's very philopspohical about the whole thing and said that she too is learning from the introduction of birth plans and keeping an open mind. I had a group B strep swab from the nether regions which was surprisingly a little sore - get the results in a couple of weeks but apparently it is still pretty rare. She said not to see her again for a couple of weeks and the earliest appointment I can get I'll be 38+5 which seems scarily close.... eek!

Hope the rest of you ladies are ok - I realised that we haven't seen marathon, emma or star on here for an awfully long time - really hope all is ok and if so, please do come on and give us a wave some time!

Mint aeros for all!

It looks the spitting image of My DS, and had mine and his nose. I'm still completely stumped, DH knows what it is, he couldn't wait at the 20 week scan and found out then but hasn't given anything away. DD thinks its a girl DS thinks boy typicaly!
Regarding the weight the Sonogropher wasn't overly concerned, it is on the 90th centile. He said it could have had a growth spurt and will slow down again, or it could just be because it is a third baby and they tend to get bigger. He wasn't anything to do with my obstetric care though as this was a private scan type place. It was the best £124 I have ever spent.
He said 25% of babies with turn from breech at this stage.
Its a bit scary knowing that it's head is what I have been feeling bashing against my ribs though.
How are we all?

Ooh worm - just seen it on fb - too cute! I think it looks like a girl - what do you and mrworm think? Have they given a good reason why you're measuring 3 weeks ahead? Plenty of time for him/her to turn though. 8lb11 is pretty healthy!

Hi girls I'm back from my 4d scan and what can I say it was amazing!
Saw baby sticking its tongue out and wriggling around.
It is currently breech and measuring 3 weeks ahead, and weighs 4lb. Predicted birth weight at 39 weeks of 8lbs11.
If it stays breech they usually do cs at 38 weeks which is boxing day !
Hope you ladies are well and have restful weekends planned :)

Hi nordicmum and a big welcome. We have shared a lot of ups and downs, questions and answers (all sorts!) on this thread so hopefully we can help with that as you are on your journey, and what a journey it's been already for you all. Great that you have got to 13 weeks -as you say, it can be hard to believe that this time it will be ok so we have everything crossed that can be crossed for you (although I may ask for a reprieve of the leg crossing in about 4 weeks when wombatjunior is due!)

Wow Nordicmom you are on quite a journey! Congratulations!
Yes welcome and feel free to join! It's a bit quiet around this thread so the more the merrier!
we started it almost a year ago when we all miscarried together and have nearly all been successful in our quest. All crossed for wellie.
There is a busier thread called the freak out room you may wish to have a look at too .

Hi!
Can I join the thread? We're 13 + w pregnant finally with DC2 ( well our surrogate is so it's a bit weird) after years of 10 miscarriages and 1 ectopic ( the surrogate) last spring. Trying to get a positive mindset on after the 13w scan yesterday was fine but having a hard time believing this time it could all work out... Haven't really found a thread about surrogacy so hanging out on the April 12 thread. Feel like I also need to talk to people even thought it's not me carrying this one ...

Wow worm - I haven't got as far as the dear john letter yet - still time I guess Thanks for your reassurances though - much appreciated. CAn't wait to see the hall pics and good job on the nesting!

I also put off thinking about all of it until quite late in the day yellow and felt really odd organising stuff for the baby until about 32 weeks, from memory. You're really in no hurry and besides, I think you can never be 100% ready. How odd to be interviewing your replacement.... I think I have piles too, but I have been constipated - not sure I can add much more than that....

Yay for homebirth harassed! -and great that you've got a set date too for induction - quite to be honest! How long will you have off for mat leave? Not long by the sound of it!

Aquayoga this morning and an antenatal group meet up this morning - one mum is due a week today but she's wonderfully calm about the whole thing. Hope I get to be like that too!

Oh goodness I have a busy few days and you all go all hormonal and wobbly !! It's normal ladies, it's a big life changing event. You will get a lie in again, I promise. Dd is very good at the weekend as she's not a morning person either so her idea of bliss is lounging on sofa with Disney films while we're slobbing in bed.......... .

I have mw last night and all is good. And, even better, my home birth is back on!!!!! Consultant wants to induce on my edd, but purely for my comfort and because he has a bit of thing about "older" mums not going over. So I'm not going to, unless I change my mind!! I don't fancy being induced 3 days before Christmas tbh. Also, because of his notes they'll do me a stretch and sweep on my edd, so hopefully that'll speed things up. Feel much happier about it all, I hadn't realised how bothered I was actually. Dh was funny though, he asked mw lots of questions about where I'd give (on the cream rug of course!!) and when they'd get to us .

worm I'm not doing too badly, it's painful and I have bad days and sometimes go home and collapse into tears!! But getting there. I finish 5 weeks tomorrow, so that's 10 x 9-5.30 and 10 x 8.30-3.... doesn't sound so bad like that. Plus I have a few days holiday left. But still no cover!!!! Although someone coming for interview on Monday.

yellow I bought some baby bits early as was worried about the whole money & Christmas thing hitting at once, but it's only the last couple of weeks that I've sorted or done anything with them. It's a bit scary isn't it?!

Morning all

Looks like we've got plenty to eat this morning already, I'm lovin' eating at the moment!
I also agree that is it normal to have these fears although I have to admit I haven't got there yet. I am still focused on the pregnancy and the birth, am not yet able to think about the bit that comes next. But you ladies are a bit further along than me. I guess this is part of the reason why we haven't bought any baby stuff yet or sorted out cupboards or done anything to prepare at all that is not birth related. I'm sure my freak out will come and it's nice to know you guys are up there ahead of me to reassure! I just cannot get my head round the idea that I will be 'Mum' to a little person who will expect me to have all the answers. I think I'll carry on in denial for a bit longer......

Glad you are feeling a bit better wombat I can't really imagine stopping work at the moment, I have to go until mid Jan but it has felt a bit weird interviewing for my maternity cover. People are enthusiastic about the role and i'm like 'don't get too comfy, that's my job and i'm coming back!' I guess my attitude will change but it is too much of a leap for me to imagine right now.

sparkly I really liked hearing how your cats have changed your life and how much you love it. Gives me hope! I guess the whole thing is like a runaway train and it's too late to get off now........it's lovely we've got each other for support

worm hmmm, not sure that if I did that it would go down very well. I'm trying to decide how much of a battle I want to fight over this compared with other things that we need to argue about! I can't wait to hear how it goes, that might help me to decide. And I'd love to see a piccy of your hallway......glad it's turned out well.

Couple of questions, have you guys received a form or something to get free prescriptions? When did you get it and how?
Also I've started to have a 'bottom' problem. I'm not constipated at all but I can feel what I believe is the start of piles........any experience? I thought they only came if you were constipated? Advice welcome please!

Morning Girls, here are some doughnuts, croissants and Nutella to keep you going! Above post was a bit rushed as I was on phone and panicing about losing a long post in cyberspace so here is everything else............

How are you guys feeling today? Much better I hope, the hormones are to blame! It would be irresponsible to not be having such worries....... how are your DH's bearing up?

My hormones are on a high this time too, which makes me think I am having a girl, as I don't remember being hormonal with DS.
I have officially started nesting too, which is something I never did with either PG, everything that hasnt moved out of a cupboard, drawer or shelf for the last year is getting binned, and all the cd's are in my sights today!! I need the drawer unit they are in for the new nursery! May have to set DD up putting them all on the portable hard drive, £10 phone credit should be just the motivation she needs!!
I will be putting a pic up of hall by the end of the week, it's pretty much done, I painted the floor in the end F & B skimming stone and it's looking pretty awesome if I do say so myself. Just needs another coat and some matt varnish on top in the hope I can avoid D-Dads dogs paws scratching it up.

Sparkly your nursery sounds lovely, feel free to post a pic!! Have you ordered the furniture yet? I am very impressed at you being such a trooper regarding working for another few weeks! 12 working days/ 60 hours and counting here!! They sent me an invitation to a sales course on Monday........"choose your attitude" ! hmmmm well my attitude is that going on it would be a complete waste of time!! I will hunt out that thread on PG thanks.

Sounds like MrsB is going through the ringer with the sickness bless her daily barf log on facebook!

Yellow keep working on DH for the 3d scan, I will let you know how it goes and post pics! in the end mine didn't come around so I just booked it and sent him a text saying so, I'm looking forward to it so much. (and so is DH he just wishes it was free!) Bump is wriggling so much now and I am feeling so close to it and just want to see it! I made it jump yesterday when I did a huge fart!!

How is the bod holding up today harassed? and how long have you got left until you finish work?

Hi ladies
I know exactly what you mean, when I was in late pg with dd 12 I actually wrote dh a dear john letter and buggered off! It wad all too much, I had horrible visions of being a single poor parent with teenagers ruining my life. So told him we may as well split now so I could get used to it! It was hormones combined with being on ml reading dramatic books and listening to the corrs!
Now I am the total opposite, and don't want the kid stage to ever end hense doing it all again!
Nice to see you again Mrsb.

Aw sparkly -you are very good at saying the right thing at the right time - thank you very much and yes, you must all come and stay next year and bring the cats too! You're right - it is normal and natural and I think I may be over-thinking things too much. I saw that thread and posted on it! It was very good to read that others are feeling the same thing. I am feeling much better today after talking it through with DH and another friend here who is 3 weeks behind me and feeling similar things. Also helped that I had my first "nice" dream about our DC - it was a girl and at 1 day old she was already talking to me and very cute!

Aw, Wombat, sorry to hear you've been feeling down. It's not surprising, what we are embarking on is sooo enormous, yet also the most normal, grounding, natural thing in the world. I had a moment yesterday thinking that if Monts went to university and lived at home for that, then I would be over 60 before he moved out! In all honestly that did make me question momentarily if I'd done the right thing by me and dh, as we never saw children in our lives and now here they are about to take over until we were almost drawing a pension. I do worry slightly about not having endless indulgent long baths, and lie-ins, and tipsy nights, the house full of plastic tat and mud and wet towels and smelly socks, and dh forgetting all his training and becoming a boy again

However, the best thing we ever did was get our cats, even though the house is full of mud and regurgitated cat biscuits and insects that creep and bite and rustly cat tunnels and half-chewed cosmic catnip bananas, and we never get a lie-in as they all pile on the bed to demand feeding at 6am; it's a delight, and also excellent preparation!
There was a good thread in Pregnancy I saw yesterday about why people felt the need to tell you your life would never be the same, and that pregnancy was a doddle compared to the years of suffering ahead, when actually this is nonsense. I already feel happier and more complete than ever in my life; tis scary growing up and realising almost the purpose of being Wombat! I am also convinced that, solid as dh and myself were before, this has deepened our bond beyond anything I could have imagined; even with a pair of lined gingham curtains on his head, falling plaster and rawl plugs raining down on him, I love him more than ever. You will be both be fine, you sound lovely and grounded and we're all really looking forward to meeting you and staying in your villa for a few weeks next year

Aaaaaaaaaaaaggggggghh! Just wrote massive long post and bloody laptop ate it! Will try and remember it.

Big hellllloooooo to all and a huuuge welcome back to mrsb - congrats on reaching your 2nd trimester although sorry to hear about all the yukky symptoms - here's hoping you get to the blooming stage through.

Wow yellow - 26 weeks already - why is it other people's pgs seem to go much quicker than your own?! Your MLU sounds great - let us know what it's like when you go and visit. I would def recommend 3d/4d scan if pennies permit - apart from anything else, I;m sure your dd would like to see it in years to come.

And you're hot on my heels at 33 weeks sparkly - I'm just coming up 36 weeks. HAd to chuckle at your DH's drilling antics! Re: your itchy feet, if your next m/w appt is soon, I would prob wait untl then as you don't have the other symptoms as you say. THat is me though and not you! Farrow and Ball sounds lovely - rather upmarket, n'est ce pas?!

Thanks for the bagels worm and particularly those b/feeding vids - v good. How did your hallway turn out in the end?

How are things with you kool? Hope all is well.

I have to be honest and say that I have been avoiding mn for a few days. I've been having a fairly major meltdown over the last couple of days. I think not working has given me more time to think about the enormity of all this - that it's too late to back out and all sorts of other irratiional things too. HAd a v good cry today and then wrote down a lot of these random thoughts and talked themt through with DH tonight which was very helpful. I really tho0ught I was going a bit mad earlier.... not quite up to 100% wombat normality but much better than I was. I think part of the problem is that people only seem to talk about the negatives - ooh, it's really hard, you'll never sleep again, your relationship wil change forever etc. and none of the positives - i.e. it's an amazing thing helping another tiny human grow, with the tears there will be a lot of fun too etc. I think I shall ask people to change the subject if they only have bad things to say in future. Enough for now!

Waves to all and leaves out the remainder of the jaffa cakes I have been scoffing x

Hi Mrsb33, welcome back! Flapjack?
Sorry you've been having such a difficult time of it hun. As an update, I am 33 weeks tomorrow, and have bought lots Mostly cosy blankets from the White Company , but have a cot and moses basket, and decorated the nursery last weekend. It is Farrow and Ball, 'Borrowed Light', a lovely tranquil light blue.

True to form, dh cocked up the curtain pole which collapsed as soon as it saw the gingham curtains approaching; drilling is definitely his achilles heel! Monts is kicking away like mad, but it sort of doesn't seem real still - in about 7 weeks I shall be holding my son! Maybe because I'm still at work (have 4 weeks left ) I don't feel I have time to focus on forthcoming events. Mat leave should see me in a calmer, more reflective place hopefully the sofa.
I have been mostly preparing for birth by eating cake. Listened to my hypnobirthing CD at the weekend and panicked that I couldn't breathe like she was asking, hyperventilated, and then fell asleep. Not the greatest success.
Worm, thanks for the video clips, I shall have a look at home tomorrow as have the day off, 5-days weeks are too much now.
Oh, question! At night I have very itchy feet (not the soles, tops of toes mainly) and am rubbing away at them frantically. I've read about that cholast-thingy, should I be worried or is it just that my feet are reacting to cheap shoes and no socks (they can get a little senstive anyway)? Have no other symptoms (no swelling, nausea, itching elsewhere, reduced kicks) so don't feel too worried, but should I be ringing triage or something? Thanks!

mrsb33!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! you're back...........

Good to hear from you.......I have been following some of your tales on facebook.......so sorry that you've been suffering so much. For me the sickness started to get better around 14/15 weeks so hope that it is the same for you.
I'm not sure if I can remember where everyone is up to, maybe they can give you a summary when they pop in.

I am at 26 weeks today, feeling fine, I can't believe how quickly the time has gone. Only 14 weeks to go and I haven't bought anything yet. I have got quite a substantial belly now though. And am having a lot of strong movements which I'm really enjoying. I've been trying to prepare for birth with yoga and hypnobirthing

Hmm that's it for me.......hope you get your phone sorted soon so we can have more regular updates from you.

Hello worm

Hmm delicious, I'm soooo hungry. I haven't done the visit yet but they happen every week and you don't have to book so I'll probably go nearer the time. The MLU is just across the corridor from the labour ward so if you need help/epidural etc it's v easy. They also sometimes come and do it for you in the MLU if the labour ward is full. Also thanks for the bf link, I haven't looked at it yet but I think I want to try to be as prepared as possible. They also do a class at the hospital but wasn't sure if it was for before birth or after but the midwife said before so I might go to that in a few weeks. How exciting for a 4D scan, you'll have to let me know all about it......I think I'd like one but DP is against. I'm also planning to do another 'active birth course' I just don't feel that the hypnobirthing course prepared me enough, I think I need something a bit more practical.

harassed that doesn't sound expensive, hope it's working. I had apple crumble and custard at the weekend, yum yum yum.

I've finished reading Ina May, it really is an excellent book. It wasn't so much the birth stories I liked but the more practical stuff in the middle. I've told DP he has to read it.

So I'm 26 weeks today, start of third trimester. I was talking to someone and I said 'only 14 weeks to go' and then went 'OMG I'M HAVING A BABY IN 4 MONTHS' I think the person thought I was a bit odd but that does seem very soon. I know it's a lot sooner for some of you but I still haven't made the connection between bump, birth and actually having a baby. We haven't bought any stuff yet, it seems too soon. When did you guys start getting stuff?

I really am v hungry, what shall I have for lunch today?

Hope you ladies are all fine, pop by and say hello. Esp you wombat now you're a lady of leisure. And Mrsb33, did you get your phone fixed?

Ooh I'll be back later, but just wanted to grab a bagel while they're still warm, ta, worm

I killed the thread :(
Can I tempt you all back in with philly bagels?

Have you been to look at the birthing centre yellow? the one here is lovely, the only downside being it is strictly midwife only run, any complications and it is a 40 minute ambulance ride to the consultant led unit. If yours is closer than that I say go for it. Unfortunately for me it's not an option being that I have to have a section......

harassed £25 for 15 mins...........£100 per hour, nice work if you can get it! Maybe you should set up in competition after your ML and get away from your boss! How are they being with you now at work? Still hoping to make it until 37 weeks?

I have a 4d scan booked for saturday, so excited but nervous at the same time!