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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

WTTC Apr/May/Jun Graduation thread

141 replies

MakesCakesWhenStressed · 04/04/2011 15:21

Hey, this is a thread for all the graduates from the Waiting to TTC thread who are going to start trying April/May/June. We've all got to know each other too well to just bugger off on our separate ways now! And if any of the Waiting crew who are still waiting want to pop by there will always be cups of tea (or something stronger) for you!

So, grab your folic acid and your sexy undies and get comfy (possibly with your legs in the air...?)
x
Cakes

OP posts:
DreamingOfABump · 07/04/2011 23:14

Af has arrived! So here starts the baby making :D although isnt day one supposed to be the first day u wake up with red loss? so tomorrow will be cycle day 1.
i have mentioned babies so much casually over the last few months that my mum prob thinks im already up the duff. i think the penny dropped when i said i was "painting the nursery oh i mean spare room". doh

Original poster
MakesCakesWhenStressed · 07/04/2011 18:26

My DDDDDDDH just turned up with an enormous bunch of pink tulips, some chocolate and 3 books on pregnancy that he got out of the library Blush

Oh - and my cervical smear all clear came through today! We're deffo good to go!

As for telling people, I kind of want to hug it to myself with DH until week 12, but will probably tell my sister as she knows we're going to start trying. Although I'm very close to my mum I feel like I can't tell her w/o telling my dad and DH's parents etc etc etc - so I'd rather wait till things were a bit more established. Plus I know my sister will be 100% excited :-) She's a v career driven glamour girl of 23, but she wants to be an aunty and buy cute little things I think :-)

She's coming to stay tomorrow - v excited :-) with this gorgeous weather it's going to be a lovely weekend!

OP posts:
Biccies · 07/04/2011 17:15

I'm with you, SWI. I kind of think that I would prob tell them if I had a miscarriage or something anyway, so what's the harm in telling them I'm pregnant? Plus there's no way they'd not notice the not drinking.
Even so, I don't think I'm going to volunteer the information. I'll just wait for them to guess ? so much more fun Wink

melliebobs · 07/04/2011 16:55

me and dh have kind of discussed it for when the time comes. I don't really want to tell my mum until that 12 week scan photo is in my hand. If something heaven forbid was to go wrong i can't take sympathy etc off my mum. We aren't really close like your typical mother/daughter. We agreed that dh could tell his mum but that is it. She has to keep it to herself, not even tell his sister. And that's only just if anything was to happen theres someone to share the burden with

ShaggingWithIntent · 07/04/2011 16:43

Ahhh I hadn't realised how tough your situation was either. I am sure that when presented with your wonderful announcement she will be happy for you. And if not then don't let that spoil your excitement.

Now.......Has anybody thought about how/when they are going to tell their family? DH said something to me about not telling them until we are 12 weeks because "until then it's not confirmed. is it?" bless him! I think he got abit confused but there is no way I will be able to keep it from my family for 3 months! I pointed out that telling family didn't fall into the 12 week rule but he's not convinced at all........

Maybe it's different for women but I will be itching to tell my mum form the moment I see that +ve result!! In addition to this, if we are going to be seeing my family then there is no way they will fail to notice my lack of drinking!! Wink

Biccies · 07/04/2011 16:01

That does sound difficult, I'm sorry if I sounded a bit flippant! I know what you mean, finding a balance that means you're not disappointing anybody seems pretty much impossible. i suppose you just have to go with what suits you and hope everyone can just support your decision. I'm sure your mum just really wants you to be happy when it comes down to it.

I think sometimes people underestimate how difficult these decisions are. I know women at work who have no kids and are in their late 50s, and they really sneer at anyone who has a baby, as though we're throwing all the womens lib stuff back in their faces. It seems that the work/life thing is something that people feel v strongly on.

I have a similar (but kind of opposite) problem with my mum. She still thinks that women shouldnt go back to work at all until a baby is 2 or 3. But when she had children, that was fairly achievable ? people didn't have crippling mortgages, and you could just about survive on one person's salary. Now you can't, but she hasn't worked that out. She just assumes that women are working because they are putting careers and personal gain above being a mother.
I think it's basically impossible to please everyone, so i just try not to worry about it! :)

Original poster
MakesCakesWhenStressed · 07/04/2011 15:24

It's not so much the having sex - that doesn't bother me, it's the inherent criticism that I'm not living up to my potential somehow... I dunno it's hard to explain, but I feel like I'm letting her down by not single-mindedly pursuing a career. I think she always wanted me to have the opportunities she missed (baby boomer who just missed women's lib) but she fails to see that choosing to have a family is part of that... I don't know. It's all v complicated, esp since I was v ill for a few years and she had to look after me just at the point when most people are pulling away from their families and forging their independence.

OP posts:
Biccies · 07/04/2011 14:01

Oh, and congrats Cakes!! I'll be joining you on the 17th (fingers crossed).
And Shagging (!), you're right, I'm going to stop worrying about Oz and just look forward to it instead x

Biccies · 07/04/2011 13:59

I'm terrified of telling my mum!! And everybody else for that matter. Whenever people at work tell me they're pregnant, my first thought ? no matter what age or marital status ? is "Oooh! You had sex!". It's really silly but I can't help it!! I've been with my husband for 7 years, and married nearly 2, so I don't think we'd surprise anyone if we announced we were pregnant!!
The mum thing though, that's different for some reason. All through teenage years etc it was a bad thing to be pregnant, and my mum would have been really upset. can't get my head around the fact that i'm not gonna get told off!!

Original poster
MakesCakesWhenStressed · 07/04/2011 13:52

It's more fun doing it with people, isn't it? if you see what I mean...

OP posts:
ShaggingWithIntent · 07/04/2011 13:50

Oooooh my Pregnacare Pre-Conception vitamins arrived form Amazon and I've just taken my first one :) Am now officially on the way to TTC. Can't believe that we're finally here.....

ShaggingWithIntent · 07/04/2011 13:21

:)

Think my Mum will be expecting it whenever we announce it as I had to explain to her why I was continually pestering her to pin down my sister for a yes or no on the December wedding!!! Other than her, I've not really told anybody that we are about to start TTC but I can't think anybody will be surprised. We've been married 18 months and are both real family people!!

melliebobs · 07/04/2011 12:42

I'm well worried Bout what my mum will think! I've always said I didn't want kids. But at 18 I wasn't in a loving relationship so didn't see the point! So to her me n having kids seems to be one big joke. She also keeps saying she's too young to be a grandma. She probs still sees me as a kid! But at the end of the day I'm married, me n DH have our own house and in stable jobs. So shell have to get a grip. Buuuuuut u never know until it happens n I tell her. As for work I can't WAIT to tell them when I am pg. Ive been waiting to jump ship for ages. I've only stayed there for the good deal with maternity leave/annual leave. As soon as I tell them I'll be counting down the days to my maternity leave n looking forward to my 11-12 months off!!!!

Original poster
MakesCakesWhenStressed · 07/04/2011 11:43

I think we'll just try a bit of shagging for now, but I did come across an ovulation site calculator thingy which said around about the 20/21 April would be good and, due to my helpful 30/31 day cycle, it'll be around that date every month for a few months. So I may be inclined to get DH really keen around about that time, depending on other 'activity', shall we say?

Now I just have to remember to take my damn folic acid!

Can I just ask... is anyone else a bit nervous about the reaction they'll get from their Mum (or anyone else - work/landlords etc)? I'm worrying about it a bit to the point where I think I'm going to be very vague about how planned this has been...

x

OP posts:
ShaggingWithIntent · 07/04/2011 11:33

Woooohoooo Cakes It's time :)
very very very exciting to be on your first cycle and heading towards lots of SWI! Do you know when you ovulate? Or are you one of those calm people and avoiding getting too bogged down in all of that yet? (I'm not but mainly because I have been using Persona for contraception and it tells me when I am ovulating each month!)

Original poster
MakesCakesWhenStressed · 07/04/2011 11:30

OK. So a few things to add
1- the feminism thread is very boring. Mostly they ignored me, one person asked me what about Eddie Izzard and the bollocks talking person talked some more bollocks.

2- I have cleaned my entire flat including sorting out my dresser (insert OMG face here, it was a mess!) hoovering everywhere, washing our dressing gowns of all things and de-hairing the shower drain thingy which is officially the most disgusting job in the house.

3- this coincided with the cramps

4- both of which indicate that AF is here (the blood was a bit of a giveaway too, mind). Makes April 7th a bloody good guess!

5- so that makes this day 1 of cycle 1, right?

I don't know how women have the guts to do AI on their own - I'm only going through with this because I have DH holding my hand (and other forms of contact too, possibly ;))

Dreamingofabump (28) TTC#1 Cycle 0 UCL 26 AF due NOW! where is it?
MakesCakesWhenStressed (28) TTC#1, Cycle 1, UCL 30/31 AF 7th April
ShaggingWithIntent (28) TTC#1, Cycle -1, UCL 29/30 AF due date 15th April
melliebobs (26) TTC#1, cycle 0, UCL 29, AF due now that's a good un, just come off the pill so it's all up in the air! 17th april and beyond i'd guess.
Biccies (28) TTC#1 cycle 0 UCL no idea, came off pill in Jan and still not back to normal but guessing AF due date 17 April
DarciesmumandTTC2, TTC #2 cycle 1 ucl 28 AF due 18th April.

OP posts:
ShaggingWithIntent · 07/04/2011 10:24

Hiya Biccies

I also may have this dilemma as DH's grandmother lives in Sydney and he really want to see her this year. I think that you can travel up to about 28 weeks and so can't really see any problems with TTC now if you are planning on going in early September.

I guess the only thing would be that you might need to travel either premium economy or club world as it's a long flight and I can't imagine being very comfortable in the economy seats if you happen to have a big bump!!

Try not to overthing it too much. It's not as though you are going to a third world country where they have no decent medical provisions!! If you are really worried, maybe chat to some of the airlines and your GP and ask their advice but I say "Go For It" and get SWI now!!!

Dreamingofabump (28) TTC#1 Cycle 0 UCL 26 AF due NOW! where is it?
MakesCakesWhenStressed (28) TTC#1, Cycle -1, UCL 30/31 AF due date unknown (due to having just come off the pill) but c. 7th April at a guess
ShaggingWithIntent (28) TTC#1, Cycle -1, UCL 29/30 AF due date 15th April
melliebobs (26) TTC#1, cycle 0, UCL 29, AF due now that's a good un, just come off the pill so it's all up in the air! 17th april and beyond i'd guess.
Biccies (28) TTC#1 cycle 0 UCL no idea, came off pill in Jan and still not back to normal but guessing AF due date 17 April
DarciesmumandTTC2, TTC #2 cycle 1 ucl 28 AF due 18th April.

Biccies · 07/04/2011 10:02

I know I've asked before but I'm gonna ask again...
I' going to Oz/New Zealand for a month at the beginnning of september. If you were me would you start TTC

a) before you went (and if so, how long before)
b) while you were there

(apologies for most pointless multiple choice question ever)

I have no idea how ill/uncomfortable I'm going to be, so what would you cut-off point be? How much do you think you can actually do at 4/5/6 months pregnant. I'm not going over there to run marathons exactly, but I also don't want to be a big blob who just wants to sleep and eat. (I also don't really want to be there during 1st trimester, with all it's puking potential)

I do wonder whether I'm worrying about this too much. I know they have doctors and hospitals etc, but a whole month away from home while PG? Is that just asking for trouble? Or is this just my cold feet trying to make me put it off for another few months...?

Whaddya reckon??

Biccies · 07/04/2011 09:55

Me!! Me!! you lot have been busy haven't you?! What fun!! Can I add my stats? I've never done this before!! Wheee!! Can someone please sort this out and make it pretty if I bugger it up?

Dreamingofabump (28) TTC#1 Cycle 0 UCL 26 AF due NOW! where is it?
MakesCakesWhenStressed (28) TTC#1, Cycle -1, UCL 30/31 AF due date unknown (due to having just come off the pill) but c. 7th April at a guess
ShaggingWithIntent (28) TTC#1, Cycle -1, UCL 29/30 AF due date 15th April
melliebobs (26) TTC#1, cycle 0, UCL 29, AF due now that's a good un, just come off the pill so it's all up in the air! 17th april and beyond i'd guess.
DarciesmumandTTC2, TTC #2 cycle 1 ucl 28 AF due 18th April.
Biccies (28) TTC#1 cycle 0 UCL no idea, came off pill in Jan and still not back to normal but guessing AF due date 17 April

DreamingOfABump · 06/04/2011 22:19

come on af where the chuff are youuuuuuuu?????? (last time i'll be saying that for a while)

DarciesmumandTTC2 · 06/04/2011 18:41

Hey Ladies

What a lovely day it is here down on the south coast.

Can I add my stats: DarciesmumandTTC2, TTC #2 cycle 1 ucl 28 AF due 18th April.

2ww is pants, trying not to over think it tho and FC lucky for first try Grin

Off to cardmaking group tonight, eastery theme :)

ShaggingWithIntent · 06/04/2011 16:37

Oh cakes that is BRILLIANT!!! THe feminism thread is a real nest of vipers so make sure you hide it and never go back in to read the responses to your post!!

I'd be flamed if I ever wrote in there!!!

Original poster
MakesCakesWhenStressed · 06/04/2011 16:16

Oh - and neither me nor DH would be entirely surprised if I ended up pretty much sleeping through pregnancy. I find it hard to function normally unless I have had 9 or 10 hours... he does fine on 6.

OP posts:
Original poster
MakesCakesWhenStressed · 06/04/2011 16:15

I have just done a very foolish thing. Not only did I blunder into a feminism thread, but I told someone in it that they were talking bollocks and explained why.

OP posts:
ShaggingWithIntent · 06/04/2011 15:07

:)
Sounds like your pregnancy hormones could have some fun 'side effects'!!
I've been pretty lucky with my periods and don't really suffer with PMT other than the fact that I seem to get drunk a lot faster :) and have cramps.

However I am permanently clumsy (to the point where sometimes I think people must think my DH beats me around the legs Hmm) as I am always walking into stuff (even worse when drunk or hungover)

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