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Conception

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Just MC and ready to try again? Pack your cake, wine and tightie whities and join us for more ranting, weeping and most of all laughing! All welcome! (Part 15)

984 replies

meliesmummy · 25/03/2011 16:50

Hello! If you have recently miscarried and are thinking of or actively trying again come and join us! We offer plenty of cake, tea and wine if needed! Come in and laugh, cry and rant as needed, and don't be afraid of asking whatever questions you need answers to and we'll try our best to answer them.

Add yourself to the stats list whenever you are ready.

wtcc = waiting to try to conceive
ucl = usual cycle length
wtf cycle = the time after your mc when you have no idea whats going on with your normal cycle

Lets hope this is a lucky thread and we all get our bfps!

part 14 of the thread

stats to follow

OP posts:
Chloe55 · 14/04/2011 08:56

stitch I am so sorry Sad you sound like such a lovely person managing to hold it together for the sake of your dh's feelings. I know why you did but I think I would have fallen to pieces, I am so glad you managed to contain the emotion until you got home - that must have been very hard.

melie you sound like I was feeling for a little while. It is def worth speaking to someone if you can. I hope your day today is better than the one before. Chin up my lovely.

ochaye I so wish that I could get excited about the prospect of it being an implanation bleed but for the past few months I have been on Clomid I have tended to spot for a week or two then have a full blown horrendous period (like melie explained). I am utterly convinced I did not ovulate this time round as I am now 5 days later than my last cycle and if Clomid had anything going for it it was regulating me to a much more friendly 31 days! So, it just goes to prove that my last consultant was shit and I have taken the drugs pointlessly this month! STill waiting on my appointment through from next town consultant.

meliesmummy · 14/04/2011 07:48

Thanks for all your worrying about me but it's a right pain to get bloods done around here! You have to go to the gp for a form, then fight hunt for a parking space at the hospital, sit in a queue for about an hour, have the blood taken, then phone the drs daily for the results only to discover they are lost/not on the system/not back yet/the gp who ordered them is ill/on holiday/not in and no one else is free. If I still feel awful on sat I'll do a finger prick and use the machine at work I think. I'll see how I go. Ive got reflexology this morning anyway so can't go today because the surgery have training on thurs afternoons anyway.

OP posts:
thumbwitch · 14/04/2011 00:18

minnie - I don't think the zumba class would really hurt but if something were to go wrong, you might blame yourself for doing it, so perhaps give it am iss until you're a bit more secure?

melie - you need to go to the doc and get your blood levels checked, sounds like you're losing/have lost too much for your own good and you need to know your haemoglobin level.

Minnie74 · 14/04/2011 00:12

Hi all

melie I'm thinking ochaye and cep must be right about the docs, it just doesn't sound right. Maybe you need an iron supplement? I know that low iron makes you really tired- I'm no doctor though!

stitch so sorry to hear your news. Hope you're ok and glad you have a great dh and mum to look after you. Sending a hug x

fx for the anyone on the tww

Thanks for all the lovely congrats messages. Still got the pains and am trying really hard not to test every day just to make sure it's still there! Trying to be more positive this time, as last time I had brown bleeding from a week before af which just never stopped and it never really 'felt right'.
Meant to be doing a zumba class tomorrow night-which i love- but am worried if i go it might all go wrong? Do you think it's too early and i shouldn't risk it?
God I'm going to be a nervous wreck for the next 9 months-which i know is just what everyone wants the chance to be so don't at all want to sound ungrateful-i'm just terrified it'll all end in the next two weeks! [nervous emoticon]

cep · 13/04/2011 20:39

mel second ochaye, would be a good idea to call drs tomorrow.

ochaye · 13/04/2011 19:22

melie - you don't sound right at all. Would it be worth going to see your GP? At the very least they could maybe recommend something to make you feel a bit better?

stitch I'm so sorry to hear your news. I agree with Collie, early tests do make things a bit harder in some ways. When my mum was having kids, there were no tests and you just had to wait and wonder. There were no scans either!!! And funnily enough, she never had an mc ... although had very irregular periods ... so my question is, did she really never have an mc? Or did she just not know about it.

thumb and flg thanks for the info about your ov dates. After my last mc I thought I didn't ov, but maybe I just missed it. And flg, you're still young - it probably is worth waiting (assuming it's not months!!).

We'll definitely try again this cycle harassed. I've never conceived again after mc without having a cycle first so I'm not hopeful it'll be a success. But I can't not try! Try and not think too much about those awful anniversaries. I know it's hard ...

Chloe, I'm hesitant to suggest this as I don't know your history very well, but could it have been an implantation bleed yesterday? I always get my bfp's very late, never before or on the day af is due.

meliesmummy · 13/04/2011 18:05

Glad he slept better Cep

Sorry to hear about the cp stitch, how was new York otherwise?

I feel completely drained, like I could just go to bed now and sleep till tomorrow :(. Dh is cooking dinner because I can't pull myself off the sofa, I haven't felt this awful since the first few days after the mc. I survived soft play but got v grumpy when I had to go across town to the sorting office to fetch dds ballet shoes only to discover they had sent the wrong size! I tried to send them back but the sorting office didn't have any working scales (?!) so I'll have to go to the post office tomorrow. Then when I got home we had missed another parcel (presumably my opks) so I have to go back again! We had a nice afternoon, took dd to see 'the way back home', if it ever comes to a theatre near you I can recommend it, it was lovely.

OP posts:
Collie2 · 13/04/2011 17:22

Oh Stitch I am so sorry to hear your news, that?s utterly crap. And on your lovely trip too. So sorry for you sweet, sounds like you were very brave while away though. I?m glad to hear that DH has been lovely and that you have your mum to lean on too.

I tell you, one thing I?ve realised these past few weeks is that FR and CB that have such early tests have a lot to answer for. I was very guilty of using them and testing way to early, but I am not sure I would now, it doesn?t seem worth the pain. Sad

((hugs)) for stitch I hope you get lots of love and hugs in RL to get you through it.

Loup23 · 13/04/2011 16:23

sorry to hear your news stitch big hugs, glad you have your mum around for a sympathetic ear x

thumbwitch · 13/04/2011 15:47

Aww stitch - sorry to hear that. Glad your DH is being lovely to you and glad your mum is able to help. :(

stitchinline · 13/04/2011 15:45

Thanks cep DH has been lovely but did have to put on a brave face as he had gone to so much trouble over the NY trip that I couldn't spoil it for him by being overly emotional and upset.

When I got home yesterday it was a different story but had a good cry to mum on the phone and she was lovely and sypathetic.

cep · 13/04/2011 15:23

stitch i'm so sorry hon. i hope you have lots of support in rl at the moment.

chloe how confusing. i definately think time off may be a good idea. hope it sorts itself out soon

mel sorry it's making you so tired, sounds like your body needed it, hopefully this'll put you back to normal. as someone else said iron tablets may be a good idea.

bump glass of wine and seduction eyes i think tonight. Smile

oli sorry about bfn, but 11 dpo still seems early to me.

thumb keeping fx for you.

hihp sorry you're finding it difficult at the moment. i keep thinking that i would be 7 months by now. not looking forward to june.

blackkat hope your dad is ok.

sorry if i've missed anyone. Ds wasn't too bad last night, woke at 5 and cried for 10 mins. then about 15 mins later cried for about 3 mins. then when alarm went off at 6 he was fast asleep. am hoping it'll get less and less till none.

stitchinline · 13/04/2011 14:18

Well my lovely BFP pre brithday turned out to be a chemical pregnancy. The line never got any stronger and then AF started monday so that puts me at CD3 today.

Quite upset and sad as had got to the point I started to think it was really going to happen, (TMI alert) even vomited up my birthday dinner and I'm not normally a vomity person.

Back to see consultant on friday so at least will be able to raise it with them and see what they say. Can't get in to see the GP until 27 April.

Will have to catch up on all i missed later as work is crazy busy today - holidays are great until you have to go back to work with jetlag :)

thumbwitch · 13/04/2011 14:14

Congrats to Minnie for the BFP - hope it all works out for you!

Ochaye - I know you didn't ask me the same question as FLG but am going to answer anyway - if I am right, and the CM was telling the truth, then I probably ovulated overnight on Sunday/Monday (April 10/11); MC started on Mar 30, sac passed Mar 31st. I stopped bleeding on the Sunday, Apr 3; so it would appear that ovulation happened quite quickly. If it did. FX!

Harassed - anniversaries are terrible - my 1st MC was just before Christmas 2009 and I worked out my EDD would have been around my birthday in 2010 - DH had completely blanked it from his memory of course, but I had a little snivel.

Melies - your period sounds really awful!! Hope it is just clearing stuff out, you poor thing :(. If you aren't already, try taking some Spatone or something to keep your iron reserves up.

Chloe - having a rest is probably a very good idea! Wish I could afford the time to.

FLG - it might be right, depends on how much private work the doc in question does! But do double check, definitely.
I am in Australia so it all works a bit differently over here - but at the start of this year I talked to my GP about fertility problems, she asked if I wanted to see a gynae consultant about it, I said yes so she gave me the name - the first available appt was over 4m away! And I still have to pay for it (but that's just the nature of the beast over here).

I am definitely constipated - this is a known "sign" for me but I have no others so I am going to wait a while before considering testing. If I "forget" about it, I can manage quite well - I haven't reached the anxious 2ww level yet, not sure why but it has to be a good thing, right? [needy emoticon]

olismum23 · 13/04/2011 14:07

Sorry its been so confusing for you chloe you never know on the other hand i do i took one of my CB digis and it came up a clear not pregnant at 11 dpo so thats me out for this month I will test Sunday but I really dont "feel" pregnant at all so i knew it was coming.

I have been to the gym and i burnt 400kcl in a hour so very pleased with myself it is well need going to take my weight problem and take control least its one thing i can do....who knows it might help me get pregnant?!

hopeful1 · 13/04/2011 13:06

Loup I cant stand this 2ww anymore. I am so neurotic i dont know if i have symptoms or not. Have a little bit of mild heartburn today and still cramping. I do feel tired but I think that is more anxiety than anything else. Dont feel anything else. Really dont feel very positive!! Going to acupuncture tonight which always calms me down. I guess it is a little early for us to get many symptoms. Fx for bfps this month. It is so nice to be on this journey with someone else x

Loup23 · 13/04/2011 11:22

Huge congrats minnie great news!! Fx for more BFPs this month.

Bump hope you get to DTD this evening and as much as possible over the next few days!!

I'm currently 7 or 8dpo having ovulated on day 22/23, would love to hold out until AF does/doesn't arrive but think i'll cave this weekend........ Let me know how you're getting on hopeful1, I still have no symptoms not even sore BBs so am thinking it's going to be a BFN this month, we'll see.

Waves to all those lurking x

hopeful1 · 13/04/2011 11:02

Minnie I am so so pleased for you how wondeful. So sorry find it really difficult to keep track what day were you on when you tested?? Pain is normal had the same thing with dd.

Waves to everyone else

Bumpwanted · 13/04/2011 10:51

Morning ladies!

Huge Congrats Millie - its so great hearing there are BFP for people after MC!

Freelance I agree it must be weeks not months otherwise that is ridiculous. If it were me I don't think I could go through this again (very scared about it happening for a second time) so if there is a high risk which you could avoid by waiting then I think I would. Totally understand why you want to get on with it too though.

Melies sorry AF is so heavy. I bet you feel drained. You need to keep your iron levels up because of the blood loss. On the positive side though you are going to have a lovely clean womb ready to grow a baby by the time its over!

Collie hope the sickness is a bit better today?

Loup are you holding out for testing? How far along the 2ww are you now?

Hi blackat hope your Dad is doing ok and the wedding planning is going well.

Chloe how frustrating for you. I hope your month off gives a chance for your body to get back to normal. I hope you feel better soon (go get some chocolate until then)

Harassed so sorry you are feeling down hun. It's only natural and we all totally undestand how hard it is at each milestone. I promise though (even though I want to throw something at people who say this) it will get a bit easier. Even just two weeks ago I was feeling totally rubbish (especially with PMT hormones) and I feel much stronger now than I did then. Sending you a hug.

Lily well done for holding out on testing!

Am feeling a bit frustrated today. Since we had the "talk" mid DTD and decided to start TTC we haven't done it once! Now I know we aren't on the key days but still! Its not DH fault but life in general just gets in the way. We went to bed ridiculously late last night as we had a leak and the night before I was in agony with my back. I just want to DTD and get knocked up. Is that too much to ask!!!!!!! I am determined to do it tonight (am on CD11) but then I don't want to keep telling DH we have to or get stressed about it otherwise he will think I am becoming obsessive...I am but he doesn't need to know that!

xx

freelancegirl · 13/04/2011 09:49

Yes I have read the campaign details and will be using a few to help me pitch the idea. The pitching process is the hardest bit but fingers crossed I will get something - especially as I can use my own experience as a case study. I had a weekend wait too as none of my local hospitals so scans on a weekend. Seems ridiculous really.

meliesmummy · 13/04/2011 09:41

That sounds like a good idea freelance, mn are doing a campaign about treatment during mc, some of their gold standards are far removed from reality though! I personally found the overnight wait to go to epu for a scan very hard (I had an over weekend wait too with dd because the only place they scan in Swansea is epu between 8:30 and 11, the gp/mw/A&E just give you an appointment the next weekday) Plus I hated having to go back to epu for my follow up scan, especially as it is opposite the midwifery led birth unit! Good luck with it.

OP posts:
freelancegirl · 13/04/2011 09:31

Chloe that just sound very frustrating and if I am honest, your sentiment that it has to a certain extent ruined your (at least recent) life is something that I worry about happening to me too if I let myself get too involved in it (says she who spends most waking moments reading up about it and checking mn...). Sorry you have been feeling so low. The trouble is with this sort of thing is that it's not just physically and emotionally relevant it also involves a lot of hormones and even at the best of times hormones can bite you on the bum and make you (well they can for me) miserable for no real reason. So at times like these when you have huge reasons to be miserable it doesn't help that the hormones are running riot too.

I am generally positive Harassed and motivated. Don't get me wrong, I'm no Pollyanna and have low moments too but I think they just spur me on. Everything else is being neglected though!

Those anniversary markers really can hit you hard I know harassed. But I think in your position I would do the same thing - try again straight away as you are right in thinking that if it does go wrong at least you can get onto some testing programme.

Melies that sounds a nightmare. It is really draining to be losing so much blood. I really hope it settles down soon too. Just try to look after yourself and take it easy as much as possible (despite having to roll around in soft play balls..).

For me, I think from what other people have said, that the email must have meant a 4-6 WEEK wait for private rather than month so now I feel a lot more positive. Also am combining my mc experience with my work and hoping to write something about it and bring the fact that many of us get such lousy treatment some attention in the media.

Lily fingers crossed for Friday - let us know how it goes!

Hello to everyone else!

Collie2 · 13/04/2011 09:29

freelance I agree with everyone else that 4-6 weeks is a very long time for a private list, I wouldn?t have thought it would be much longer on the nhs. Is there no one else you can check with while that particular mw is away? I am sure not ttc straight away would be incredibly hard ? I know ttc helped give me a focus, but those odds are significantly better and I think would be worth the wait ? although it pains me to say that.

minnie congratulations on your bfp darling. I had mild pains (bit like an ache) on one side before and after my bfp ? lasted at least a week. I am certain this was implantation. I?ve also had lots of other pains but since had scan and all ok. They?ve settled down now, so I am sure they are all normal.

chloe how frustrating about your AF. Were you opk-ing this month? Did you not get a line? Is that usual not to ov when on clomid. I suppose this is exactly why you need better care and treatment. Have you had your referral yet?

mels I am so sorry your AF is so bad. It does sound heavy. If it is the last of the lining at least this will hopefully see you back to normal soon.

harassed so sorry you are struggling at the moment. Milestones are so hard I know. You sound very busy getting ready for you move, which is good if it?s a distraction, but don?t work yourself too hard. Its very draining and you need time to be kind to yourself ? and I really mean this harassed, find the time to do little nice things, even if its just putting a dvd on and sitting under the duvet with your dh and a box of chocs. Its what helps make this horrid time remotely bearable. (((hugs)) for you x

Good luck to loup and hopeful and anyone else on the 2ww. Fx for you all.

hope you are ok hun.

There?s a few people we?ve not heard from in a while tokyo hiding Hadrian loola vagas brooke Skitoo and angela hope you are all lurking but are ok xxx

meliesmummy · 13/04/2011 09:14

How frustrating Chloe!

I'm still in agony, my usual prescription pain killers (mefnamic acid) aren't working, I've just taken some co codamol, I hope it works because yesterday I promised dd a trip to the soft play this morning! I feel really tired, I'm assuming from the blood loss and broken sleep, the clots this month are ginormous, I really hope this settles down soon :(

OP posts:
harassedinherpants · 13/04/2011 08:43

Congratulations Minnie!! Pains are normal, I've had them every time and have 3 dc's. They are worrying though I know.

Blackkat lovely to see, hope you're doing ok. I do lurk on the "updiffed" thread occasionally to see how everyone is. Hope your Dad is doing ok.

Chloe you must be fed up and confused!! Is your gp any good?

flg you always sound sooo motivated! Grin

Mel hows the bleeding today?

Lily fingers x'd for Friday for you!

Cep how was last night??

ochaye I didn't actively try before 1st af after first mc, but didn't take any precautions and got a bfn, but did get a bfp in the next cycle. I then mc'd so I'm unconvinced and hence why I'm not waiting again. I figure if I have to have 3 mc's then I might as well get it over and done with.

Really struggling at the moment, it's just anniversary after sodding anniversary. Yesterday was 12 weeks since erpc, today is 3 weeks since mc........not helped by the fact that we've got so much going on at the moment. Life is pretty stressful!!