TTC after a miscarriage - Ready to try again, we can do it this time!!!

Hi everyone!

Sorry I disappeared, took boys to school and thenhad to pop to sainsburys!

You've all been very busy chatting...

PB - you need to take one step at a time. Deal with testing first. If it a bfp then plan from there. It so easy to get all your feelings at once and then you start to feel overwhelmed. When I had my MC, I was trying to grieve for my baby, think about TTCing, dealing with my DH who isn't keen on another, trying to keep my chin up so as not to drag those around me down, and as a result it all got too much. When I stopped to think about it, I had forgotten to grieve for my little one, because I was trying to deal with too much at once. So, what i'm trying to say, really badly is that you need to deal with one thing at a time am i making sense? If I am then thats a first!! !! Oh ,an like the others said, you must tell us the result of the PG test asap!

Slinkie - Oooooh, not long to wait!! Will you be testing at the earliest opportunity or are you leaving it a while? When would AF be due?

All this talk about TTc being all unromantic and stuff makes me giggle. Did any of you see a thread on here last night about some MNers hating sex! I am not ashames to say I LOVE SEX!!!!!! I can't wait til I'm TTC coz I will be at it all day everyday!!! None of this every other day business!! I say bonk away!! Swingin' from the lightfittings, every room of the house! Whoo-hoo!!!!!!......

Ooops got a bit carried away then!!!

Morning All!
Boy you ladies can't half natter!
Haven't got the time to read the thread so if anyone can give me a quick update as to whats what then i would appreciate it!

Hope your all well?

Slink - I'm sure everything will be fine. I@m crossing fingers, knocking on wood and alsorts for you.

PB - Make sure you tell us the results. Wont be happy if you dont let us know

i am testing in a week and the suspense is killing me. my boobs are very very slightly slightly sore and im really hoping that means something but i reckon i could be imagining it- probably setting myself up for disapointment though.

Can't test now: I'm at work and the test is at home!

But think I will bite the bullet when I get home tonight (or maybe after ds has gone to bed).

pb- i reckon you should test now- then you can let us all know in a few minutes and we can all send you positive good luck vibes
and i really wouldn't worry about genetic problems at the end of the day i know there is increased risk with your age but you should not worry about it- i think all of us here will be emotionally wrecked by a next pregnancy and so worried that m/c will happen again.
but from my recent experience being told that my baby 23 weeks born had only 12% of survival and that she would probably have cerebal palsy and be retarded etc i did not care one bit i was just desperate for them to give her that chance of life.

It is so funny chatting about the whole ttc with dh's. They are so funny about the performing thing and I don't think they like the pressure much but it is funny and we have to keep smiling and try and keep some romance involved!

prettybird, it is really important to do the test and deal with your feelings then. I hope you get a bfp and you can move forward. I know you need to prepare yourself for a negative too, I will be there soon enough. You are lucky you are so fit and well, it all counts for it all being well if you are pg. much luck and fingers crossed for you.

PB - Its completely up to you whether you test. If you want to be extra sure why not wait until its a week after your AF was due then your 5wks pg if it positive (i think not sure about dates myself)

Good luck and keep smiling it cant all be that bad.

Morning Slink. lol at the wam bam scenario.

Lol I think they secretly enjoy it. All this bonking .
Prettybird- Go ahead and test, at least you'll know. Then you can adjust. It's silly being scared. I know I will be so nervous and panicky if I get pg again.

I'm actually not worried about whether I can cope with the pregnanacy - I am probably fitter than most younger mums (just run a half marathon, cycle 6 miles a day commuting) - but I am worried about potential genetic problems.

But I am probably most worried that if I test again, I will be disppointed by another negative. Somehow if I don't test, then I can keep up the hope. Not logical, but then, whoever said we needed to be! [win]

So I am worried about the result either way!

morning everyone

i do not think my dp is putting enough effort in! its wam bam thankyou mam at the mo - he says he's tired. ttc is not that romantic though is it- with the " no it really has to be tonight love" type of conversations lol

Thanks hellkat, I agree that life is for enjoying and I don't want to get totally obsessed with ttc but it is hard not to. I feel a bit like a ticking bomb!!!Dh is being gr8 but i think the whole ttc at specific times are a bit strange for him but not complaining yet

Prettybird - I'm sure everything will go fine if you are pg. Don't worry, there's loads of new fandangled madeical stuff they've got now so I'm sure they can fix alot of stuff. But there will probably be no reason. Even if you are alittle bit older than most people that have children I'm sure you're still as capable as the rest.

Do the test. At least then you can stop worrying about the ifs and more about the whens.

Good luck.

oh prettybird,, so many thoughts and feelings. you must be doing the right thing for you and your family as it is something you want to try for. I really hope that this works for you and I wouldn't worry too much about ds as he will be great, think about you and test when you are ready. It is an exciting time, and for all of us who have mc it is such a worrying time no matter what your age. Please let us know how you get on and just come on and chat when you are worried about anything at all, there is always someone here to talk and help and being a newcomer to this thread I can say it is working for me...

I've appeared briefly on and off various of the previous threads. Had a missed miscarriage at 11 weeks back in the summer of 2003. Finished my last of 4 cycles of Clomid 4 weeks ago.

My period is now 4 days late. I don't want to get my hopes up, as since I started taking the Clomid, my cycle has been 28 days, 32 days and 27 days. Prior to Clomid it was 24-26 days, but I was still ovulating - the Clomid was supposed to improve the quality of my eggs as I am 44.

Although I bought a test 2 days ago, I didn't want to test until I was at least 4 days over - as I tested and was disappointed the time my cycle was 32 days.

I think I will test tonight - but part of me is scared of doing so. Does that sound strange?

I'm also now worried about whether I've done the right thing in trying - what happens if I have another miscarriage, what happens if the testing shows there is a probelm (because of my age, I will go for all the tests possible), is this fair on ds, who is now 5 and an extremely happy and confident wee boy?

I know that I needed to try, as I had desparately not wanted ds to be an only child, but now that I might be pregnant, I am suddenly assailed by all sorts of doubts

AWWW that'll be a lovely present!
I would'nt abstain from everything, enjoy it all while you can is my motto

Thanks Hellkat, I don't know wether I should be making the most of the time I have left b4 pg or abstain from all bad things now! I slipped into a bit of a habit post mc of having a few rw's in the eve and must stop now. The cm stuff is interesting and I will wait for a while b4 doing pg test, date af due will be my wedding anniversary so that should be a gr8 pressie if all works out, can't wait for the 17th Oct!!

Wow that is incredible CP, I know what you mean though. I think some people forget that after 9 months of it being about you that you have to become completely selfless for the rest of your life! It is a shock but the nappy changing is v.important as are feeds....good luck with giving advice I am sure she will appreciate any support you can give her.

Awww Cp. I had to change both my boys constantly at that age (otherwise would get the tell-tale wet leg). Well done for managing to brave it though, good for you hun.
Baby- Normally you can test 7-10 days past ov but I think it's best to try and wait until at least the day you're due. That way it should be a definite result. Your cm goes stretchy and clear when you ov (I think, if I'm wrong girls help me out . I've always bought the cheapy tests from either Poundland or Wilkinson and they've always worked brilliantly for me.

Morning all

Just popping on as dead busy with hols coming up and dh now has glandular fever so attending to him too.

Friends baby was lovely and I had a cuddle.He was so tiny,3 weeks and only 7lbs and my dd was 7lb 15 born.

My friend is struggling a bit,shes not a bit organised and hes crying as hes hungry.I gave her some advice re his feeds as he clearly isnt getting enough.But I was there 4 hours and she did not change a nappy while I was there.She hasnt been out of the house either.I dont think shes got PND she is just v lazy.Shes put on 5 1/2 stone and is just sat there eating chocolate!

I know we all have our different ways but seeing as she waited so long for him I thought she would be more up for it

Speak later,off to the bank

Hi girls, so much is happening in your chats. I was wondering if anyone knew about the earliest time you can check if you are pg? I think I should be ov just now but you never know really after mc and only 1 af. I want to know asap and have heard about early pg test, any info ladies pls? Also a wee bit early in the day but I have seen some chats about cervical mucus and this being an indication of ov, can anyone confirm for me pls? Thank you and good luck everyone, fingers crossed for all the babies we want, can't do the dust thing but lots of fingers crossed. xx

Good luck HK. I hope it is the one for you.!

Mumswish- As soon as ds2 was in my arms I was planning the next one , even though it was an agonising labour.