TTC after MC, ERPC anyone want to join me??

Morning all! Back to work today, everyone's moaning but actually don't mind, I feel quite well rested. Wellie, hardcore argument, kicked out from a family do and then barred from a wedding! Not getting on your wrong side! My family are very sedate, there may be some flouncing and sulking but that's about as confrontational as it gets. We're probably not a very verbal family actually, my parents and sister are unaware we were/are trying to start a family, nor do they know about the mc as it happened the week of DN's birth. Nice to have you guys here! Hugs to manamana, can't imagine anything worse than someone close to you coming out with insensitive comments, hope you are home and in your own tranquil space now.
Re. pre-seed, so it only improves the situation if you normally need to use lubricant anyway? I don't seem to have a problem there, DH thinks I am in a permanent state of arousal but I probably just 'over-produce' Managed to DTD three times over the Christmas period, Christmas Eve being very tipsy and wanton and utterly in the wrong position; conversely yesterday which was a sedate affair, ending in DH going "So are you going to do the bicycle thing now then?" I have a feeling the day was Boxing Day, and we've missed the boat, unless Christmas Eve sperm managed to make it uphill and hung around for a couple of days. I've been drinking grapefruit juice to try and make it cosy for them but I think you're meant to have about a litre a day, and I've not the inclination nor the finances.
Think I will poas on NYday, although nothing shows positive until implantation, which occurs around the time your period is due, is that right? I'm not holding out a great deal of hope for this month, however have mentally redecorated the nursery and thought of good names if it's twins, so am looking on the positive side Waves to all x

Hello all and welcome Wellie and Battery

Sorry for not checking in over Christmas - was a big hectic with in laws here and visiting family. We had a good xmas although my youngest DS was quite poorly with a cough and cold and I was a little bit frazzled with him whinging on boxing day and my mum tried to start an argument with me by reminding me that he is still a baby as if I had forgotten he is 19mths old and saying - well how would you cope with another? I feel your pain manamana. My mum is not on my side with ttc another baby so much so that i have pretended we are not trying again until the summer to get her off my back.

Battery - I don't think light periods alone are a symptom of ashermans - I was petrified that the ERPC had caused it in me too as was very impatient waiting for AF. I did a lot of googling and I think you get a lot more period pain too but this sort of thing can drive you crazy - so do get it checked out if it is worrying you.

Star I was so so worried about my Af coming back (see above) and googled a lot and I think anything up to 12 weeks seems common. I am so sorry it is taking such a long time for you - it is very very frustrating - are you looking for ov signs at all to give you any indication that it will be say in 2 weeks from when you spot the ov signs?!

I have eaten far to much over xmas and am going to try and cut down today, but xmas makes you hungry I think - the more you eat the more you need to eat!

Well my Af has come and gone - it was heavy for 2 days, medium for 1 and then light for one then gone. A big relieve and nice to have a week off over xmas from knicker checking for AF or EWCM. Now I have a week until i expect ovulation - wish i didn't feel the need to use the ovulation sticks but i do so will POAS everyday from the weekend. I think this month could be a no go on the BFP front. DH is away all day up north on wednesday 5 Jan which is supposed to be O day so I keep my fingers crossed he gets back to dtd - not a snow crisis. The next week he is in Rome from Monday until Thursday so if I ovulate late I am stuffed. This is a real problems as I have had some minor issues with irregular period when I was a lot younger but hopefully that won't rear its head again

Got to go my kids are fighting and crying.

Morning all

wellie sorry to hear about the family row but fingers crossed it will blow over when everyone has calmed down a bit. I know what you mean about the bleeding stopping, i also felt that this marked the end of that stage and i could move to the next step.

Big hugs to manamana re insensitive comments. I think Xmas can be so difficult with the pressure to spend time with families etc but at least you are off today....only need to hold on a few more hours. My in-laws are great but I still really enjoy being back in my own flat and bed.

wombat we were in Toulouse in the South West....the heart of duck country. You can't move for duck related products! We eat a lot of meat and cheese when we're there so am now going on a fish/sushi eating frenzy!

And in other news I got EWCM today...hurrah. I normally have 28 day cycle with EWCM on day 11 and ov day 13 or 14.....so we're 1 day behind schedule this month but i think that is because af had a bit of a slow start. I'd already but DP on notice for tonight and Friday but it's good to have EWCM too......I can't believe how excited I am about the arrival of bodily fluids and telling your guys about it! So tonight is the big pre-seed experiment. Am a bit nervous that I might put too much and DP will wonder what is going on so am going to start with a cautious amount and see how it goes.
re BBT I often can't get back to sleep once awake so that's why i'd find it annoying.

How exciting to have a friend to stay, her ex DH sounds like a right arse. I know someone who went through that same experience, men are just so cowardly sometimes......how long has she been with new chap? Maybe he'll ask her on holiday? oooh I do love a happy ending.

I'm off for lunch with a great friend today who I haven't seen for a while..we're going to a french bistro but I think I'll have a salad.......I want to still be able to fit into some of my clothes by new year's eve!

Who was going to be testing on NYE? Was it nurse? How are the symptoms? Any interesting ones to report?

Morning all.

Blimey wellieboots - that sounds like some Christmas.... hope you are doing ok now and things with the family are restored soon. V pleased for you to hear the bleeding has finally stopped.

mana - sorry to hear re: the things people have been saying to you - that must be hard when you're still so early on after the MC. Sending virtual snifter of brandy your way....

yellow - have been meaning to ask whereabouts in France you went to - the thought of proper pate and cheese is making me drool.... . You could be right re: that stealth marketing tactic - would be v if that was the case - talk about taking advantage of susceptible women.... wish I could offer some reassurance re: the pre-seed although I can't honestly believe that with all the research / clinical trials / rules and regulations etc that anything medical related has to go through these days that they could make false claims.... not impossible mind you. I think if you've bought it already then go for it! I've been POAS for the last 5 morning but no smiley face yet but the CM consistency does seem to be changing a bit so maybe tomorrow. What's your usual cycle length? Mine is 28 so I really hope I ov tomorrow or that won't be a long enough luteal phase (it needs to be 10 days or more apparently for a successful implantation). Re: the BBT, I tried it a couple of times and had thermometer right next to bed so I could stick it in my mouth as soon as I woke up and then go back to sleep once I heard the beep. The thermometer I got keeps a recording of the last recorded temperature so I could write it down after I'd drifted back off to sleep. Stopped after I got a few weird readings though! Might start it up again next cycle though.

Friends arriving this morning from Aus to stay for a few nights en route to England so looking forward to catching up with them. She is great friend from uni days who went thru almost every phase of IVF with 1st husband and then on the very morning he was due to give his sperm sample he told her that in fact he didn't want kids!! They were divorced not long after and she is now with lovely new chap who I hope will pop the question soon as she's 37 like me and so time running out a little....

Hope everyone else is ok - any updates on EWCM, 2WWs or similar?

And hooray for an end to the bleeding wellie. I was v pleased when it finally stopped. Exactly as you say it felt like it was still happening while I was still bleeding.

Goodness wellie, sounds horrendous. Hope you're right and that things will calm down. Sending you a big hug. Am struggling to see all posts on my mobile so apologies for not responding to anyone else. Am in need of understanding words after 2 nights with my mother. First day she came up and put her hand on my stomach like you would with a pg person and said 'how's your tummy'. Today we were out and my youngest was being a bit stroppy and she said something about being crazy to have thought about another one. Mostly I let what she says wash over me cos she never thinks but I just feel really sad that she can be so thoughtless and insensitive. We're leaving tomorrow, can't wait. Anyway, thanks for listening x

hi everyone a very late HAPPY CHRISTMAS to you! thanks so much for your welcome and virtual support, I have really needed it, as people in RL seem to have moved on after a week or so, it's Christmas, etc, etc. (Like I (or any of us!) chose for this to happen to us so close to Christmas!)

welcome to the newbies - glad that you've found us but sorry that you needed to, if that makes sense. I will catch up on everyone's news in the next couple of days hopefully.

Ended up in a big family barney on Boxing Day night - basically because I am hopelessly oversensitive at the mo and totally overreacted to something nasty that my brother said, which then escalated into a full blown slanging match and us getting kicked out! Great fun!

Oh, and barred from his wedding as well (hoping that bit will change once everyone's calmed down a bit but watch this space!)

But my happy (tmi) news for today is that my post op bleeding has FINALLY stopped (I think!) so that at least I can move on in my head from "this is still happening". :)

waves to everyone and thanks again!

Hello ladies, I'm back!! Have eaten as much cheese and pate as I can handle and am back home trying to give my liver a little break!

MrsB33 is it really better to use nothing? I was under the impression that it really helped cos of the ph or something.....I'm disappointed now :(

wombat don't know why but I feel a bit suspicious of that thread as if it was some kind of stealth marketing or something......Any ov signs for you yet? I think we must be at the same point. I think i ov normally on day 13 which would be Thurs so DP is also on alert. No signs yet but I've agreed a schedule of tomorrow and Friday and poss Sunday if also required. Who said romance is dead? And I'll be sneaking in my pre-seed....well I think I will, I am a bit concerned that it might not be the right thing to do now!! Argggh, i wish there were some more definitive answers on what the 'right' thing to do is! And poor your being at work......that's not good at all. I hope you have plenty of chocolate to eat?

Hello battery I'm sorry to hear about your mc......my af went really heavy after my mc and stayed that way.....so I don't think that there is a 'normal' and as the others have said I think Ashermans is v rare but worth popping to the Drs if it will put your mind at rest. I'm jealous of you getting pg first time......always seems to take me a year!

Oooh nurse I've got my fingers crossed for you. Would keep legs crossed too but can't (see above)

broughthim I know what you mean about the weight.....I think I've put on nearly a stone since the bfp in Sept....how is that possible? Ok well I know I slacked off the gym and then needed to cheer myself up because of mmc and erpc......erm and christmas! So def need to take some action in the new year. Obv can't start yet, it would be silly.....new slate new year!

manamana very impressed with mince pie making and sparkly nails....any pies left? i haven't really had any cos they don't do them in France.......need to get down the supermarket before they put them all away and start selling easter eggs!

Hello sparkly what's the latest on the EWCM and the hot sex action? looks like there will be plenty of us on the stressful, symptom spotting 2ww. Although I'm not really getting my hopes up too much given it took so long last time......but then I didn't have pre-seed.....ah ha ha ha! We're your cats ok, no frozen cat flap?

Hiya star I think up to 8 weeks is perfectly normal but if it does make you feel better to see GP then do. Like other wise ladies have said that can put you in a 'system' as I have heard sometimes that you can be given progesterone (or something) to make them start again. (disclaimer I am very fuzzy on these details but I'm sure the GP would know)

strawberries how did the eating and drinking go? manage to scoff plenty? I'd be interested to hear how you get on with the BBT cos I think know I'm too lazy to get up at the early weekday time at the weekend to make it accurate. Also worry that it would make me more obsessive than I already am!

hi wombat, yes ive seen it, mine came the day after my af and weve been using it ever since, just trying to get into our stride B4 we ov next week.
Ive done abit of research and have read its better to actually use nothing at all, but if you do need to use anything pre-seed and the above all recommended. Im really not sure its going to work, but theres no hard in trying i say
waves to everyone, and welcome to the newbees.
Will catch up next week when i have abit more time....
X

Has anyone been following this thread on the conception board? I'm guessing the conceive plus they refer to is the same as pre-seed? yellow and mrsb - keep us posted on your progress please!

Morning all.

battery - welcome and you're not crashing at all. I can certainly appreciate your concerns. From what I have researched and as sparkly ponts out, it can take women up to a few months to get back to normal (for them) after an ERPC and as brought says, Ashermans is rare. Having said that, all the statistics in the world are often not enough reassurance and I would go with sparkly and recommend seeking a professional medical opinion if only to set your mind at rest. Perhaps this would at least "get you in the system" and wouldn't it be a wonderful thing to have to cancel your appointment because you have got back to normal (or indeed because of a BFP!)? The fact you have ov symptoms I believe is a good sign . Again, hate to quote stats, but I think even if sperm are swimming in the right direction, the egg has popped out at the right time etc., there is still only a 1 in 3 chance that they will actually be get together in the right way.

star - nice to hear from you again. I guess I would offer the same advice to you re: getting in the system. I fear they may say to you to leave it a couple of weeks but if you can spare the time, why not make the appointment with the GP anyway for a week or so? So often we can feel out of control in these situations and by actually doing something like make an appointment gives a feeling of taking back a small amount of control. Please note this is wombat suggestion only, not official advice

brought - enjoy your time off still - I was thinking of you as I was typing that message yesterday!

sparkly - I take it you got away with the typing prior to hubby finishing film?!

nurse - good luck with the wait - we'll all be hanging on and I know I would be super tempted to poas on nye - please do keep us posted. Hope your cold goes soon too.

satsuma - how lovely of you to ask - it's very kind. The best advice I could give would be just to listen to her, try not to be shocked at what may seem some fairly radical things she may say, and if she seems to want to talk about it, ask gentle questions to encourage her to keep talking. Reassure her that she is not burdening you by talking and that you want to help her. It's tempting to come up with platitudes like it's for a reason, at least you know you can conceive, be happy with what you have, there's always next time etc. - as friends we're often so anxious to say something to make the other person feel better that we end up saying nonsense which is where the advice about listening comes in. However, whatever support you offer her will be hugely appreciated.

waves to koolforcats, kitkey, mrsb, manamana, strawberry and yellow and others I may have missed - hope you're all doing ok.

Hiya Star, bit tipsy but popped on whilst in bed and husband is downstairs watching ridiculous man movie a film. If he comes up the stairs he'll think I'm buying stuff in the sales online so I shall have to be stealthy

I did oodles of mumsnetting research after my erpc, when totally focussed on ttc again, and a lot of threads said it would take 10-12 weeks to have a 'normal' period again, and other threads said that if you had a bleed before this that you were a witch it wasn't a period as such but intermittent spotting. In the search for information, for reassurance, and for hope, one can happen across the opposite and take it as a given that something is horribly wrong. Today for instance, I have been focussed on what I perceive as sub-standard EWCM (TMI alert, seems to have a bit of blood in and damn, not nearly stringy enough!). It seems to take some women longer to get their cycle back on track, but I think that's the body doing what it needs to do.
Battery, welcome! I am so sorry this has happened to you twice, it must be awful. I do think you may be a loon, in the most affectionate sense I've not researched Asherman's, as I'd never heard of it before entering the realms of MN and if I read up on it I'd think I might have it; in ignorance I am fairly confident I don't have it. If in doubt seek medical advice
Satsuma, wanted to say hi and that you're obviously a really good friend for coming on here for advice, which in itself will shine through when you are comforting your friend. I'm quite private so didn't want to talk about it at all to anyone but mumsnet DH, but also wanted people to know I was having a shit time and therefore to convey their heartfelt sympathy sublimally, but then I'm a pain in the arse. Like Nurse said 2 or 3 times just be a good friend, and if you've conceived very recently perhaps keep it under wraps for the time being, otherwise we shall be shoulder-barging you out of the way!

Hi everyone!! Just had a quick catch up with the thread so thought i'd say hi again :)
Hope you all had a great Christmas and Happy New Year to you all. Hope all you new ladies are finding the support from this thread helpful as they are all great girls!!!

I'm a bit concerned i'm not in synch with you all. It was 6 weeks yeasterday since the op and still no period. Do any of you have any advice as to when i should be taking myself off to the doctors? Don't want to go if they'll tell me to leave it a couple of weeks but wondered if anyone knew how many weeks they'd think was too long.

Love to all xxx

Hi everyone... hope you don't mind me popping over - I need some advice. Sorry if this has been asked before! I've just found out my friend had an MC just before Christmas. I really want to support her and wondered if anyone had advice on what is helpful/unhelpful to say to her? Don't want to make her feel any worse than she already does Thank you in advance!

Thanks for your reply :) yes - I have ovulated on both months since my mc - I chart too and have had clear signs of OV. Was really hoping for a bfp this month as we have caught first time on both the last times. This pregnancy lark is turning me grey!

Hi ,
Ashermans is everso rare battery I have always had light periods and have 2 DC's, I know it's easier said than done! try not to worry x
Have you been getting any signs of ovulation?
Poor you winter I still have a week off work yippee!

hello :) sorry to crash your thread, i wonder if I could seek some advice?
I had 2 mmc's this year - the last one in october resulted in an erpc.
AF arrived 5 weeks after the op,and despite ttc, I am now on my second AF.

My question is that both AFs have been really light. I was never heavy before but these are so light I could class them as spotting. has anyone else had this? I am now convincing myself that I have got ashermans and will remain childless forever (loon)

Any words of experience or reassurance would be gratefully received! xx

Hope you all had a good christmas x

Afternoon all and I hope all the hangovers are slowly subsiding. Any good sale bargains out there?

I'm back at work today and struggling to get motivated.... also a bit pre-occupied with looking for ovulation symptoms. Have been using OPK for last 4 days with no signs yet but I think I ov on about day 15 or 16 which is tomorrow / weds although I'm guessing my cycle might be still be a bit off-track after - we shall see. DH on standby!

Happy christmas Girls, hope you all recieved BFP/AF/EWCM ........ delete as appropriate!
I got the EWCM and it's tempting me to try this month as it seems like a waste, but florida is less than 7 weeks away.

I have put on so much weight and am now a stone heavier than I was this time last year and the majority of that has gone on since July when we started trying. I have GOT to do something about it! There is snow ice on the ground here so a run is out! and eating less is totally not an option when I have cheese in the house (I only allow it in over christmas)

I hope the trifle went down well sparkly I am sure the lack of alcohol in it was made up for!

Hope you are ok mrsb33 onwards and upwards, and a three month goal is a good one I think.

manamammma I found some mincemeat in the cupboard, it must have been a gift from someone and we have worked out it is at least 3 years old........I made some with it and they were the dogs bullox that is my tip for the future!!

Waves to everyone all the best for a liquid new years eve xxxxxxxx

happy christmas ladies, eat drink and enjoy. Pate, cream cheese, rare beef and lots of wine!! Oh well there are some benefits to not being pg!! Xx