Clearblue Fertility Monitor Support Group Buddies Vol 4!!

Hello everyone, I'm so glad it's Friday!
I've been having a bit of a horrible week, although nowhere near as bad as some of you ladies have been having!

According to CBFM I had my ov high last Friday/Saturday which was exciting however I'm finding this week hard. I had the worst rage earlier this week. Monday, Tues, Weds I was in a constant state of red mist and yesterday and today I am on the brink of tears. I think the emotion of it all had rather got to me. Another 5 days to go until AF due - at this rate I'll be in pieces! Anyway, I'm on holiday next week (staying at home) so hopefully that will keep me calm while I wait...

Fingers crossed for everyone x

Fedup - thank you. This gp referred me for testing 11 months ago (problem is antibody factors in sperm) and has never said there was an issue. I have repeatedly been asking for treatment on the nhs - 6 months ago any hope of treatment was removed and no contact from them since. There is little treatmetn in middle of country where I live. If I am licky I can get 12 sessiosn whith a psychologist but that has been refused. So how do I get someone to talk to, smile and say all positives so 2yrs down the line when my eggs are older and worthless I may get to pay a fortune for treatment.

Sorry - I have had diagnoses, labels - YET no treatment ever but they are prepared to stop physical medical treatment as I don't qualify for treatment.

I understand where you are coming from - me work with someone eventually from nhs - smile, say all that I am doing to improve and they may eventually tick the box. Then got to find new hospital who would treat me as I would not be someone anyone would tough, yes? so somewhere miles away, as a teacher means only cycle once a year as a teacher then, or someone with bad results so less likely to work.

I don't mean to sound angry - but this is your legal advice?

Choccie the hospital meets to discuss each case, lying on the form not helpful. The hospital decide ultimately adn Gp has an input. My Gp does not want to support me, yet he does not need think I need counselling - he never has committed his budget to give me any. Antidepressants yes.

So if you have mental health issues, hope you have a fanastic support system - I know of one person hwo had 3yrs of weekly sessions with a psychologist in London. Here a basic trained nurse is more than I am allowed. And it will mean nothing, as I havt to tick boxes and meet targets.

I would like to state tat:

• my employer knows everything, work with kids
• I am indudated from babysitting overnight for kids of frineds - well the 2 that know the trugh of me
• I have Occupational Health and CRB for everything

--- welfare of child is the issue? My manager said you'd never know I had depression and at work I am blal blah of niceties.

THis blocks private funding - so rules out abroad too. But summer holiday is a long way to wait for travel abroad - am 35.

The needles were all there with first dose and told no.!! Waiting for others to say oh you may be ok is not helpful for me to pin my hopes on.

Have two choices - church prays (well they are and no move forward) or I find another source of sperm that doens't invovle hospitals. No male friends or relatives that can ask. More website hunces if follow that routs. You see gp can stop Fertility Clinics but not affairs, using men for sperm or donor sperm done by self. Yet he woudl say "she would not dream of acting like that."

No support forward. Childlessness, loneliness, all friends totally ignored me - as they are so happy with children they don't want to spend time with someone they can't be bothered to spend time with unless they need a babysitter.

Bye - I am no longer worthy to be on Clear Blue Monitor area as you are all talking about treatments or peaks and highs and I cannot talk about that - as I am unsafe to be around young children and may well make a comment that woudl hinder your own children it appears.

Take care, but keep your own special babies away from anyone with mental health issues as they are not allowed fertility treatments unless they have husbands iwth right jobs or a gp that is human,

Choccie - Nearly didn't post the truth as so - but reading your post I am glad I have. If ONE other person benefits from my nightmare then I hope it is helpful. Choccie my Gp fererred me, known the whole process, getsa letter from alocum consultant who is chasing my gp who is diabolical at paperwork, gp goes defensive and causes problems. IT IS NOT MY FAULT EVENTS HAPPENED in the past - but it is how I make my future that does. I:

• no psychologist ever
• no talking therapy on nhs

Gp not talk to me or raise concerns. Husband seen twice now and actually gave him a print out of HFEA guildleines which he did not know. All I want is support - am not asking for mental health support - they don't want t give me that, just stop me getting pregnant with a loving husbad. I can have affairs and they can't stop that. but my church would not be happy with that someone!!

Will read all posts sensibley after by brother's weddin, where my role is too look after their toddler and for my hafl-term with him,nephew = as obviously failing a welfare of child check doesn't stop me doign this, or teachign, or running residential kids camp with others. Etc.

Hi Notnearlyasblondasiwas I'm very glad its Friday tomoz, i always find the week leading up to Ovulation a bit stressful, worrying will we actually BD on the right days etc, etc, will be glad when Saturday is here and i just have the 2WW to think about! x

Hi ladies sorry have only just got back to the thread, sorry to hear your news keziah. I don't know what to say really, it just all seems a bit arbitrary and unfair.

I would like my stats added to the list please.

Anyone else thoroughly sick of this week and beyond grateful tomorrow is Friday?

I type so fast i make so many mistakes! Sorry all! x

oooh thanks KC didn't realise that, what would I do with you?! You're my fountain of knowledge! I am hoping that i'm in the 80% that it takes 18 months to get pregnant, i'll take your advice on board on when I go i'll know exactly what to say. FX

Hope everyone else is ok - nearly weekend again! Quite night in with DH tomoz and then BDing! [hwink] he's gonna be sick of me by Saturday!

Then Wedding in the The LakeDistrict all day Saturday should be nice

What is everyone else up to, anything exciting? [hgrin] xx

keziah Have you looked at IVF outside the UK? Apparently in some cases it is cheaper. I know someone who went to Turkey!! Don't give up.

I am blisteringly angry for you. I know its not a popular sentiment but I have major issues with the NHS. I am not British and my experience of medical care prior to coming to the UK gave me "unrealistic expectations", what one UK doctor told me. Basically, I was used to getting a certain standard of care and was shocked at the frankly sub-standard and dehumanising experiences I have had time and again since coming to the UK.

I may be in the same situation as you, ironically. In both my two failed PGs I had weird symptoms - like panic attacks. And on the first occassion I slipped into a depression because I thought there was something wrong with me not feeling 'happy' when I was PG. As soon as the MCs happened, the symptoms disappeared. In the 2nd PG, I had no depression because I knew the symptoms were PG related.

I thought I was sensible by seeking help - just in case it happened again - but in doing so found myself bounced between EIGHT different health professionals - all of whom wanted to knwo my life-story - evenutally ending up at a psychologist even though the the first psychiatrist I saw had agreed it wasn't psychological. And then despite letters being sent to the psychologist by my GP that I didn't need therapy and it was for CBT treatment, I ended up spending a couple of months in weekly sessions where I was asked things like, 'what was my relationship with my parents like'; and 'what was I like as a teenager'.

All of this while my state of mind was totally fine and I felt healthy. It freaks me out that this is all on my records, and some moron at some point in the future - who probably won;t even know me - has power over my life. I can honestly say I would NEVER recommend conselling to anyone in the UK after my experiences.

I am now in line for IVF, and also had to fill in that form that you did, and because I have such deep skepticism and such a low regard for the lack of intelligence that seems to go on in NHS decision making, I told my DH that I feared some stupid twit would look at that cock-eyed process I went through and rule against me having IVF.

And now you say this has happened to you...! I feel so angry on your behalf - I can only imagine how you must feel, because I know what that would do to me too.

My DH has asked me to ask you: was it your GP who made the decision, or did you GP relay information and it was the clinic who made the decision obased on what she said?

I am right at this moment trying to get an appointment with my GP to make sure she doesn't pull this stunt on me.

I urge you to not give up keziah. Take some time, but do think about other places. Do you want me to find out about the clinic in Turkey? The women I know of who went there is now expecting twins!

Hi Emma. OPKs don't tell you if you are ovulating necessarily. They attempt to predict the LH surge that occurs prior to ovulation to allow you to time BD appropriately.

If you do ovulate, and you have a regular cycle then they can be useful BUT here's the caveat

"a rise in LH does not show if there are problems with the rest of the cycle. Women with polycystic ovaries, for example, tend to have high levels of LH all the time."

Therefore, you could test positive on an OPK but be anovulatory.

Sorry, I don't mean to worry you unnecessarily, but fertility monitors and OPKs do have their limits.

A blood test is much more indicative of ovulation.

After ovulation, the empty follicle on the ovary produces progesterone.

"The level of progesterone is significant: it rises sharply a few hours after ovualtion, and stays high for several days, but is seldom raised in women who have not ovulated."

See what your GP says first. Our GP started investigations because she agreed to refer to the FC. If your GP suggests booking in for bloods then maybe interject with "Am I right in thinking that I'll need to book in for that one 7 days before my period is due so that the progesterone test is done at the right time?"

Knackered Cow sorry didn't see your post, i was looking at page 16 as the last page, thanks for the info, feel a bit better, knowing the exact procedure. Should i mention all these tests when i go in so they know, i know what i'm talking about, just worried about being fobbed off, although i'm sure they wouldn't be that mean!

I do ovulate as i use the CB Digital Ov tests each month and have always got a positive on either day 12 or 15 every month.

I will wait and see, gonna book an appointment for 1st week of Nov, i will know by then if this cycle has been a lucky one or not.

Will keep you all posted! xxx

Hi Lychees ooooh how exciting I will keep everything crossed for you! I really hope you get your BFP at the weekend .

Thanks for the info I will check with DH have just texted him as he had a blood test recently and i'm sure he had it done at our doctors, hopefully he did!

He's just texted back, he had them done by the nurse at our surgery. I can't make an appointment with the nurse before i've seen the doctor can i? I'll have to see the Doctor first and then hope i can get an appointment between days 2 and 5 is that correct!?

What a pain in the bum feel stressed about it already! x

I will get my Peak tomoz at its day 15 and thats the day i always OV (if it hasn't been day 12) so BD'ing on Tue, Wed and tonight, tomoz and Sat..... if that doesn't work then i'll be really , he, he! x

Hello ladies. Sorry its been a while since i posted but i thought id give it a break for a little while whilst i was a bit fed up.

Lovely to see all the new faces - welcome :) this is a fantastic thread with lovely supportive people.

Well on day 23 now, am 3po according to FF - ovulation was late this month by three days but at least i did ovulate i think, last CP i had at the beginning of the year messed up my cycle a bit too so its only to be expected on 2ww now but not holding out much hope in that dept. I will wait till the 31st to test which is the latest ive ever waited (going out that night though and will be 13dpo) to test whilst ttc this time but dont want to get caught out with early testing again as its just so disappointing!

Good to see familiar faces here too, (Ljg)anytimenow great new name! Hope you are feeling better now. Good luck with those tests next week.

lychees good luck for this weekend - will be posting more often now so will keep up with your potential news, really hope its good!
Waves to everyone else.

Keziah i can really hear the despair in your post :( how utterly unfair and shitty that was of your GP to get you this far down the road only to pull out the rug from under your feet. I know there are rules and they have to abide by them but i cant understand why this wasnt pointed out to you earlier. Apologies if ive missed anything but i really feel so bad for you and your DH. I dont for one minute believe that God doesnt want you to have a child but i am sorry your journey to having one is much harder than everybody elses :( This is probably not feasable but just asking the question? Would you consider or be able to think about going abroad for ICSI treatment at all? Just thinking that the issue for the NHS is that they wont treat your infertility as you have had depression but if you fell pregnant by yourself or through your own means that that would be that - perhaps look into treatment somewhere out of the country if you could possibly afford it? fedup's post is very good advice, perhaps when you have had a little time to lick your wounds some of the points will be worth looking into and expediting? I hope your as ok as you can be x

Hello everyone

keziah I think I am beginning to understand your situation further. Talking therapies are notoriously difficult to obtain on the NHS and it must be so frustrating for you. I think fedup has given excellent advice. I knew she would.

I spoke to DH about this last night and he was rather surprised that the GP hadn't spoken to you previously. He did say that sometimes the FC simply sends a form to the GP for him/her to complete and send back, and this may have happened in your case? That said, I think this should have been discussed with you openly well before you got to this stage and it has compromised the relationship that you have with your GP.

I am reading Professor Robert Winston's excellent A Child Against All Odds (highly recommend it if you want to know about fertility treatment and the history and ethics surrounding it). He asks a very pertinent question "Why do we scrutinize infertile people more closely?"

I wish you the very best in making a full recovery and I do hope that you are reassessed as suitable for treatment in the near future.

Emma Not all FCs need day 3 tests (as Lychees says actually done on day 2-5). It's more important to have the Day 21 progesterone done, which will give an indication of whether you are ovulating at all. When they do this test, they will also test for prolactin, FSH and LH.

It is unlikely that the GP will do any tests there and then. Normally appointments are made to go back for blood tests and swabs. So you won't need to book your appointment on a specific day. In some areas, as one of the ladies here mentioned, tests are done at the clinic itself. It really will depend on the system that your PCT uses.

Storm your comment about me made me . I guess it's my personality. I deal with problems by finding out as much information as I can - I feel better when I understand things. DH would say I'm a control freak!

Emma, do you know if they take blood in your surgery? I know mine doesn't, so when I went to see my GP, I was on day 1 or 2 of my cycle and she gave me referral notes for CD5 and CD21 blooed tests to go and get my tests done at my local hospital on the right days. I believe the day 3 bloods can be done on CD2 to CD5.

No sign of AF yet and I'm feeling a tiny bit hopeful. It's been 20 days since my first peak which is the longest I've gone. My body may be playing tricks on me but I am holding on until the weekend to test.

KC can i ask a quick question as you're so clued up on all this .

I've been reading up on the tests you said i would need they're called the The Day 3 Inhibin B Test testing on day 3 of your cycle for FSH, LH & Prolactin.

As i'll be going to the docs for the very first time, do I book my appointment for Day 3 of my cycle and turn up and say, not conceiving, blah, blah, its day 3 today, can i have this test done.... or do i have to prewarn them what its about and say i want blood tests on that day with the nurse etc, no sure if GPs do that test.

Or should i just turn up and then see what they say and then maybe have to wait till day 3 of my next cycle?

Hope you can help, want to turn up on the right day etc, but not sure how it all works x xx

Kezia: I am very sorry to read of the predicament you find yourself in. You seem very well informed of your situation and where the law stands on it.
However, I would recommend that you make a concerted effort to be seen by a psychiatric councillor, generally you should have that referral made through your gp. When you work with the counsellor, you will be assessed routinely in order to chart your progress. This ultimately should be relayed to your gp, and all the other health professionals who are directly or indirectly concerned with your welfare.
I have come across some of your posts on this and other threads and am confident that you will make a significant enough recovery/progress to present to your gp and other health professionals, to the extent that they would not stand a chance if they were to appeal against your fitness as a parent/carer.
Unfortunately, the onus is on you, to go through the proper channels in order to prove that you are able, and sound of mind. It does sound harsh, but as you may understand, in the things that have been happening receently in modern Britain (brought to our attention by our fantasticly enlightened media), health authorities and health professionals are trying to work together for the safety of individuals and moreso of young children. To be frank, if you were to have a child of your own naturally now, even then there would be stringent supervision for you and your child's welfare.
I hope that you are not disheartened by the recent turn of events. The ball is now in your court. Try and turn this to your favour and seek councelling and advice. The more professionals you can get to vouch for you and bat for you in your corner, the better. This will stand you in good stead in the long term. Take care. xxx

Thanks for support.

KC - they will not treat me even if pay privately due to compulsory welfare of child checks that is HFEA ruling. I couldn't lie as know if I did the consequences would be this. Problem is due to events of this year by mental health people I had to (on advice of several nhs people I add) to make an official complaint. All that has done is make things worse for me (never had any nhs talking therapies) and my private therapist is too ill to support me or even write in my support. Gp said "as you have been suicidal in the past then you might be with a toddler so i will not support you" - and that is that. Can afford private cycle but same rules!! Saved so hard, waited 11 months from referral for testing to this point. Have drugs here, husband has problems that need ICSI. So unless I fancy an affair (and don't!!) no children for us, ever. And 6 years of no contraception tells me no miracles (not wanting to talk about religion here as know lots don't believe in God, but am a christian and this just reinfoces that I dont deserve children.) Husband devastated, can't talk to me. Prepared for treatment failing not for no treatment when went for first injection of 6 weeks of ICSI cycle. Its ok will not take over this thead here! Lesson learnt - if have supportive gp great. Even if I swopped gp damage is done. Not young enough to prove the recurrent depression I suffer from (not stopped me working in educaiton mind you!!) as new gp will read all notes and say "wait x number of time to prove to me etc!!)" I don't deserve kids can see everything screaming at me.

Yes, positive BFP needed - hope it comes very very soon for someone!!

Hello Ladies,

Not been around for a good week r so I think?? Thats probably a record for me!!

Welcome to the newbies, here's hoping that you find this thread as helpful as I have. These girls are fab

Just been catching up on all the goings on...

anytime loving the new name - its good to see that your getting somewhere with the docs. I hope all goes well hun.

Keziah I am so sorry to read that your GP put the Stoppers on the FC and treatment. It must be so disheartening. It makes me so angry that these people can get away with doing things like this...the thing is, they let you get this far?? I can't imagine how you must feel hun. You deserve the very best treatment and I hope you can find a way to get it. Don't give up hope. I wish you the very best of luck and competely understand why you would want to leave the thread hun but please pop in every now and then if and when you feel like it and let us know how your getting on. XXXXXXX

Izzy this is the first month where I got just 2 high days before I got my peaks. Maybe its just a matter of time hun...

Pink LMAO at your comment about DP's todger.

KC your like a never ending pit of TTC knowledge - how do you know all this stuff. I can't even remember what I had for breakfast.

Well this is my second Peak day - I OV'd today, I'm pretty sure of it as temps dipped considerably this AM, so I'm expecting a temp surge in the morning just to confirm. Also trying to persuade DP that we need to get jiggy tonight too as we never seem to get down to business on the day I OV according to my records (ha how funny does that sound). I even showed DP my charts from previous months just to prove that we didn't have sex on the days I OV'd - LOL if only I could see myself eh!!!

Nothing else much to report my end really. Apart from the fact I pigged out on pizza express for lunch and am still feeling super duper full.

Hope you are all keeping well, will post again soon.

P.S I'm sure we're due another 'announcement' on this thread soon. Keep on keeping on girlies.

xxxx

Hello, welcome to the new people

Keziah how awful for you, and for to find out at the last minute is particularly unfair. Keeping my fingers crossed for January for you.

Well, this month's sexathon is offically over thank goodness!! I am totally sick of the sight of DH's todger and am looking forward to a few day's break from s.e.x. At least I feel that we've done all we can this month. Am desperately keeping everything crossed that it works this time.

Keziah am so sorry for the way you've been treated, that's terrible. I can't believe your gp would fo that! I really hope you manage to find a way around it. I know things must seem bleak right now but don't lose hope ((((hugs)))) x

Right I know I haven't been around much hut have a question for those of you who've been using the CBFM for a while - is anyone getting long periods of highs before a peak? It said in the manual that we should get 2-5 days high before a peak (although I would expect it to be closer to 2 than 5) but I'm now on day 6 of high with no peak yet. It might well come tomorrow because last month I also had 6 peaks then a high, but I'm just wondering whether this is usual?

In the grand scheme of ttc it's not actually that helpful to have huge long periods of "highs" when you're trying to pin down when to swi. I can't actually be fertile for that long each month otherwise I wouldn't need the monitor to conceive! All that happens is that we're worn out before a peak even occurs.

Anyone else having this?

Keziah, I'm so sorry for what happened. It makes me bloody mad actually. Right now, I know you must feel despair. But there is still hope for January. I am keeping my fingers crossed for you.

Welcome notsoblond and ovumahead.

Welcome notnearlyasblond & Ovumahead to the thread, throwing lots of luck your way . xx

Keziahhopes So sorry hun, that has made me so mad - who are they to decide that, you deserve a child as much as anyone, and your past health problems are irrelevant, you're a good, honest person and have just as much right as the next person.

Keep believing, you will get there one day, one way or another, and i agree with KC I would defo get a solicitor on the case.

KC Wow thanks for that information, that's brill, will have a proper read of that later on and make sure i've done all my research before i go, dont want to be booking appointments on the wrong days etc, its all quite technical isn't it! I defo ovulate coz i've been using the CB Digital Ov Sticks on days 12 and 15 each month for about 6 months and always get a positive each month and then being either 26 or 29 day cycles, my LP? (Phase thing)appears to be the correct number of days 14.

Just want to know what i'm talking about when I turn up at the doctors - dont want them fobbing me off telling me to come back in another 6 months that would make me very xx

Love the new name AnytimeNOW [hgrin]

Glad to hear that you are being referred for investigation.

WRT FSH levels, as I'd asked on the results line, they gave me the expected ranges for our lab:

Follicular phase: 2.5 - 10.2
Midcycle phase: 3.4 - 33.4
Luteal phase: 1.5 - 9.1

Apparently levels over 10 - 12 in the follicular stage hint that your ovaries are starting to fail. Levels over 30 - 40 are seen in ovarian failure or post-menopausal women.

My FSH was 3.5 done on day 21. AnytimeNOW certainly looks as if your levels were absolutely fine.

FlyingCat TTC#1, Cycle #26, CBFM cycle 2, age 30, UCL 28-29, CD121
Rach879 TTC#1 Cycle #7, CBFM cycle 1, age 30, UCL 30-34, CD88
Jenni4 TTC#2, Cycle #5, CBFM Cycle 2, age 36, UCL 26, CD68
Hairytriangle TTC#1, Cycle #10, CBFM cycle 1, age 42, UCL 28/29, CD54
Boba82 TTC#1 Cycle #16, CBFM cycle 3, age 28, UCL ?, CD45
Emmylou30 TTC#1, Cycle #3, CBFM cycle 2, age 30, UCL 35, CD36
chocciechip TTC#1, Cycle #8, CBFM cycle 8, age 39, UCL29, CD33
Lychees TTC#2, Cycle #12, CBFM cycle 8, Aged 36, UCL 30-35, CD32
Starlet22 TTC#1, Cycle #14, CBFM cycle 8, age 34, ucl 25, CD31
AnytimeNOW TTC#3, Cycle #5, CBFM cycle 4 age 38 UCL 28-30 CD28
wantbaby TTC#1, Cycle #9, CBFM cycle 4, age 38, UCL 30, CD25
MissLolita TTC#1, Cycle #5, CBFM Cycle 1, age 31, UCL 30, CD24
Keziah TTC#1, Cycle #26, CBFM Cycle 14, age 35, ucl 28-31, CD22
KnackeredCow TTC#1, Cycle #13, CBFM Cycle 2, age 31, UCL 28, CD22
PinkCustard TTC#2, Cycle #10, CBFM Cycle 5, age 33, UCL 30-35, CD22
Rosieposey TTC#5, Cycle #10, CBFM Cycle 3 aged38, UCL30, CD22
IzzyWizzyletsgetbusy TTC #3 Cycle #3, CBFM Cycle 3, age 34, UCL 26-28, CD15
Stormbird TTC#1, Cycle #4, CBFM Cycle 4, age 28, UCL 28-32 CD14
EmmaC29 TTC#1, Cycle #11, CBFM Cycle 1, age 29, UCL 26-29, CD 13
Missyraines TTC#1, Cycle #12, CBFM cycle 7, age 33, UCL 32, CD10
Ses TTC#2, Cycle #4, CBFM cycle 6, age 37, UCL 30, CD9
Birdietimestwo TTC #1, Cycle #2, CBFM Cycle 1, age 36, UCL 24-25, CD8
alien06 TTC#,1 Cycle #4, CBFM Cycle 1, age 28, UCL 30-33, CD4
Headbanger TTC#1, Cycle #9, CBFM cycle 2, Aged 30