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Original poster

CMs - To quit or not to quit, that is the question???

34 replies

needtoregaincontrol · 25/04/2010 18:50

I've had a terribly weepy day today and although I've other stuff going on in my life, I know most of my upset is over the childminding business.

Where do I start.....???!!!!

I've been doing this job for 5 yrs and most of the time love my job but tbh, I'm feeling TOTALLY OVERWHELMED It's not the actual 'caring' for the children, that can be challenging at times but I find that much easier than the paperwork!

I bet if others were to hear what's on my 'to do' list for childminding, they would think it's not all that much but FOR ME it is. Ds2 is a major handful and I started back working when he was only very young still, unfortunately the very day EYFS commenced. I am such a perfectionist that because I'm not doing all these wonderful things I have in my head, I feel like a rubbish childminder Because I have all this stuff in my head, I'm feeling overwhelmed and therefore getting behind on things I used to do just fine. So I'm doing LESS than I was, all because my head is full of everything (stress!). I feel like I'm sinking fast and tbh, this weekend have thought of nothing more than quitting.

I DON'T want to quit, I need to get my life into some kind of order but HOW?

I recently had a week off and spent hours and hours putting together proper EYFS files together so I felt better and thought I knew where to pick up when I had more time. The problem is, I'm still trying to find my own system I'm happy with and therefore need thinking time with my files, something I don't get with my kids. I'm working on getting the kids out of the house more but dh says 'you'll always be behind, you'll never catch up!' so it's not helping me get motivated. I feel he's right but then I'm sure if I had a massive load of time to catch up with EVERYTHING, once I have my system in place I should be fine. I hope so anyway.

I just don't know what to do to get on top of it all. I'm so exhausted in the evenings I can't focus on this type of stuff so I thought that if I had some weekends to catch up, once I know exactly how I'm going to do things, I can do bits in the evenings and it won't feel so bad.

I don't know what I'm asking for really? Just felt it was time I snapped out of this feeling very sorry for myself and try and sort my life out. All I want is to care for the children and do what I need to do paperwork wise without constantly pushing my kids away at weekends

Any advice welcome or even hand holding would be very much appreciated.

Thanks if you got this far. Oh and if any others feel like I do, come and join me and lets try to get ourselves sorted!!

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looneytune · 02/05/2010 13:13

Going back to this pre-school form, they really really DO want this form completed and although I don't want to be bullied into something I don't want to do, I've decided to give it a go as I think it will make things easier actually. They said it doesn't matter if it doesn't get sent back each week so that's not too bad.

If anyone has a sample of a 'report' they've done, I'd be so so very grateful

Thanks again for all the support xx

looneytune · 30/04/2010 18:53

Oh dear, having a hard time then! A termly report WOULD be great but I understand if it can't be sent. I'll email in a sec using a different email address then you can try and 'reply', see what happens? x

atworknotworking · 30/04/2010 18:51

Oh well at least you got 1 thing then and some spurious gliffs been trying to send a Termly Report which I think you will find more useful, but the bloody thing wont go and I can't send anything at all now I knew I shouldn't of changed internet provider. I can get emails though so dunno whats going on.

looneytune · 30/04/2010 18:10

Can't be dealing with changing my name back lol......I never got a chance to check earlier but just have and I do have an excel Observation Record which is great, thanks

atworknotworking · 30/04/2010 17:59

my sendy thing says u havnt

Think the ones you got havnt got attachments on, email me your addy and I'll post the buggas.

Can you tell I'm in email hell

Original poster
needtoregaincontrol · 30/04/2010 14:26

Sorry (again) that I never came back when I planned. I can now finish replying.....

Muddleduck - thanks, I know you're right, I just know I should be doing this stuff and worry about the fact I'm not doing what I should be. I know I'm good with the children and the parents are happy etc, I just feel I should be doing more.

80schick - oh how I could do with someone who could blitz this for me. Nothing anyone else can actually do for me regarding the observations etc. but I suppose there are other bits, I have enough of my own personal stuff that's also piling up to be done!!

atwork - just checked on my server and I HAVE had your emails so thanks Going to have a quick look now before school run then a proper look over the weekend

boys - I know the slashed wrists feeling I will definitely try your approach and see how I get on

no4 - I'm ok thanks, still feeling stressed but not on the level as when I did the OP

OP posts:
Numberfour · 29/04/2010 14:25

NRMC: how are things going with you today? Friday looming and the long weekend is nearly here!

BoysAreLikeDogs · 27/04/2010 16:22

aha I have trained self to do TenTenLoaf otherwise I get exhausted doing just one thing

Everyone is different, you could do 2020Loaf or whatever, depends on your concentration span

The basic principle is that you don't have four hours looming in front of you, that would just make me want to not start and instead

atworknotworking · 27/04/2010 15:11

NTRC have emailed stuff, several times, I keep getting a server error message thingy coming up. Can you email me (seem to get some emails still) with another addy if you have one, wondering if that might work. Also putting wierd glif things on, dunno whats happening, so I thort if I send from my private email to another one of yours then that might work Failing that I can post a copy.

Original poster
needtoregaincontrol · 27/04/2010 14:52

Sorry for not coming back sooner but last night was mental as had overnight stay so changing of bedrooms etc to sort, dh to wait on as he only had his op on Thursday and then I pretty much fell asleep on the sofa once I sat down! lol

Anyway, after a mental morning with 4 x 1 yr olds (why do I do it to myself?!?!?!! lol), I've now got 10/15 mins before the school run and (for now) the kiddies are napping.

Boys - I like that idea but how do you dip in and out of different bits? I find it takes a while to get into something but once I'm into it, I don't want to stop as I loose my train of thought. Would love to do it your way if you can share you secret

pippin - thanks, I just stress about having it all to do but I think it's the worry that adds to it, I'm sure if I sat down and sorted it I'd wonder what the big fuss was about lol.

underpaid - that's VERY helpful to know, really, I know this is what I want to do and I don't want to stop and regret it so thanks for sharing that (I don't remember you leaving????)

atwork - yes, I was VERY down on Sunday. I've been generally down for a while (not enough to affect the kids!) but Sunday was an awful low day. I will sort a list when I can and you can all help me prioritise

Right, I've run out of time so will come back tonight (hopefully) and reply to everyone else

OP posts:
HSMM · 26/04/2010 16:22

Personally ... I would ignore the pre school form and just give them a copy of an obs you have done? Why do any extra work?

Original poster
needtoregaincontrol · 26/04/2010 13:10

Yes, that's all that was on the form, rubbish isn't it. I spoken to them and even they thought it was rubbish, couldn't answer when I asked what day they planned to give it me and what day I should give it them? I don't think a weekly form is needed as sometimes they stay with the same interests for longer and also, what if they don't 'achieve' something new that week?

I'm going to speak to the manager there but I told them I'd probably do my own thing as I don't HAVE to use their form if I don't want to. We'll see.

God I hate all this stuff!

atwork - I've emailed you

OP posts:
atworknotworking · 26/04/2010 11:18

Is that all thats on the form? Its not very indepth is it. I agree I wouldnt want to not have a copy, I would do your own and staple a copy onto their form. Then you arnt doubling up.

Original poster
needtoregaincontrol · 26/04/2010 11:06

Not ignoring everyone, I'm so grateful for all replies and will post proper replies later

Just a quick thing about this pre-school form. This is the boxes they have:

Interested this week
Achievements this week
Area of learning and planned extension

They have these boxes twice, once for them and once for me. So looks like they want me to write something weekly? But then I don't have copies of what I write if I just hand it in each time.

I don't find the last box very useful on this example, what do you think?

Interests this week: looking at farm animals and their babies, animal sounds game

Achievements this week: completed a farm puzzle unassisted

Area of learning and planned extension: encourage & develop new language, to try new experiences, to recognise sounds of animals

The bit about language and new experiences are surely ongoing all of the time so written for the sake of it? Yes, I get the recognising sounds of animals but they know most of these, I suppose they just need to get to know them more as new.

So, do I do my own thing or fill this form in? What I don't like is not having my own copy. I'd prefer they gave me something for my file and I gave them something.

WWYD?

OP posts:
atworknotworking · 26/04/2010 10:33

Yep I reckon I know who you are now

Email me on sticky fingers at talk talk dot net I had your email addy before but changed providers so lost loads

I have a format for termly report, I can send you if it helps, I wouldnt bother backdating, use the report to cover the gaps then start again.

You've had a hell of a time lately don't put yourself down I think you are doing an amazing job just in keeping going.

EightiesChick · 26/04/2010 10:15

I'm not a CM but am posting as someone else who struggles with getting paperwork in order. The answer for me has been (so far) a combination of 1) doing small amounts each day a la Flylady and 2) getting a friend who is good at sorting and organising to take the lead in blitzing it. Do you know anyone who is good at this sort of thing who could spend some time on attacking it for you / with you? If possible you could maybe do some kind of exchange for them, eg childcare.

Original poster
needtoregaincontrol · 26/04/2010 10:11

Well there is only one way round that and that is a formal letter requesting to be exempt. Stupid isn't it. And from your background, you know what you're talking about!!! The worst thing I think is I feel I'm not a good childminder anymore because I'm not doing this right. The children are happy, the parents are happy, I do make sure I help them learn etc etc. but I'm rubbish at writing it all down. Oh well, that's life I guess. I actually spent the weekend looking at nannying jobs but I really don't want to do that, I love my extended family and my boys love all the children coming.

OP posts:
muddleduck · 26/04/2010 10:09

Would it help to be reminded that you can have 'satisfactory' paperwork and still be an amazing CM who has a massively positive influence on the children that you mind and is highly valued by the parents you work for.

Don't judge your success as CM by the quality of your paperwork!

fairimum · 26/04/2010 10:03

I HATE the fact that she has to even have one!!! I don't want it, you don't want to do it and it is only 5 hours a week for dogs sake....grrrr

Original poster
needtoregaincontrol · 26/04/2010 09:58

lol, you want to help put stuff in your own dd's EYFS file?!!! Now that WOULD be funny

OP posts:
fairimum · 26/04/2010 09:54

big hugs! Let me know if you ever want an extra brain to bounce ideas off... not sure how many brain cells I have left though!! lol
xxx

Original poster
needtoregaincontrol · 26/04/2010 09:35

Leeloo - so are your reports more list like? I'm trying to picture them as I imagined writing lots of words???

OP posts:
Original poster
needtoregaincontrol · 26/04/2010 09:34

Leeloo1 - how do you do the 'next steps' for those, I like that idea and I have stickers, I need a system that is as easy as possible

One day ds2 WILL calm down and not be SUCH a nightmare child who constantly climbs and bounces on things he shouldn't lol. When that day happens, I'll feel like I have the easiest job in the world!!

Off to make a cuppa and have a look at what work I need to do (luckily 1 mindee at preschool, other mindee asked to go to bed and other one not here - ds2 is behaving 'ok' atm!)

OP posts:
leeloo1 · 26/04/2010 09:31

Cross posted - I do quarterly reports too and I'd say ignore the forms you've been given if not helpful and just write up the obs you have under the 6 areas of learning and ta-da - a report! Much quicker than it seems!

leeloo1 · 26/04/2010 09:29

Aww, bless, sounds like you've had an awful lot to deal with! No wonder you're finding it hard to get on top of. Something I found useful for obs was to get rid of the post-its (stupid more trouble than worth, lose stickiness, have to file etc etc) and instead have an A4 page for each child that has 3 columns 'date', 'observation' and 'area of EYFS' so would put something like:

12/4/10 X looked at me and said ra-ra-ra-da whilst I fed her today. EYFS: CLL and PSED

I find this much easier to keep on top of. If you have the NCMA EYFS stickers, you could use them in the last column, or use different coloured highlighters on the EYFS acronyms, then you can see at a glance if you've got loads of KUW obs but haven't got any PD obs for a child (or whatever). HTHs

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