Is my nanny acting inappropriately here - opinions please

I'm a nanny and I agree with you OP. The baby is 12 months old, therefore not a tiny baby who sleeps most of the day.

Yes, you are right to be concerned. Have a chat about your expectations, what a nightmare that you are back to work next week.

I do believe she oculd have been playing with your 12 month old, they love to be stimulated and watching TV is not on.
You are paying her and even though you want a 'home' environment, she still has roles and duties to do and watching TV is not one of them. She should be embarrased that the TV was even on.

Good luck

im not a great daytime tv lover myself but love background noise and will often have radio on in kitchen and playroom at same time which drives my db mad

her last faily had tv on a lot and thats what she was used to, she obv felt comfortable enough to watch it with you, and wasnt being sneaky

just say you dont like non child friendly programmes on during the day -although she doesnt have all 3 sole charge at the moment, it is often harder having one child and mum around with the others

so in point 2 you have told her, she said fine and that should be the end of the matter

People whop employ nannies often expect them to work at a higher standard than they do themselves as they are paying for it and I think that is fine.

I would have expected her to be still in the wanting to impress the boss mode so playing lots with the baby and not watching television.

I think you are being a bit precious not to allow her to watch any tv but she needs to be sensible about what and how much she watches.

One boss told me she would start the morning with radio 4 then watch Richard and Judy, didn't mind if I did too. I would normally have the radio on if the babies were sleeping.

Unprofessional imo, especially as you'd said you don't want her watching it! I'd have been very annoyed.

If she wants to watch daytime TV she can do it when the children are asleep. I'd make sure you are very clear with her about what TV can be on and when - for example, CBeebies for half an hour at 5.30pm.

Not at all normal for a nanny to have daytime TV on during the day.

I'd ask her not to have it on, myself.

Another nanny here that would only put the tv on for myself if the children were napping. It wouldn't even occur to me to put the tv on whilst playing with a 12 month old.

So, YANBU to ask her not to watch tv whilst she has charge of the children.

Did you tell her you weren't comfortable with her watching tv before or after the tv watching incident? There are several studies that indicate that having tv on, even in the background, can delay the development of babies and young children. I wouldn't want the person who looked after my child to be watching tv at all when my children were awake or around.

Nip it in the bud now. Best to make nanny aware of things you don't want her doing now.
I rarely watch adult tv at work, though it has happened on occasion - Working Lunch for example, whilst toddler was asleep and chores done. Toddler wasn't watching it though!

How much TV time you permit during the day for your children is also something to raise at this point, as you may be wanting your children not to watch very much cbeebies/cbbc etc.

Nannies diaries I personally hate as I find they tend to be the same thing written in them much of the time. Keeping some kind of log when children are ill though can help... and indeed must be kept for things like giving medication.
I find photo's are a good way to show what has happened during the week and when first starting with a family, text messages sent to mum so she has some idea of what the children are doing during the day.

I don't think you're being petty. If she's bored looking after your baby and wants the telly on to stimulate her, then she's in the wrong job.

I'm just wondering, wouldn't she be on her 'best behaviour' if it's the first few days? Knowing you'd be coming back soon?

I'd feel very uncomfortable with someone watching tv, as I hate it on as background. I think maybe you need to set some quite firm ground rules, whatever she's been doing in her last x years of nannying, so that she abides by your rules for your house.

nannywobbles - yes, I would have though she would have be doing something 'fun & creative' & certainly 'child centered' to impress you at this stage so either she is going to be a lazy pain in the bum or she is one of the few people who is able to just 'be herself without feeling the need to impress' - which could be a good thing (you get what you see - no 'front').

I don't think you're being petty! I think we're on the same wavelength though.

If she had it on in the kitchen while doing the washing up, with the baby playing in the plastics drawer I wouldn't think anything of it. But if she was really trying to watch it and just keep the baby quiet with a few toys, then I wouldn't be too impressed - especially at this early stage!

For me it wouldn't be an issue. I used to have daytime TV on all the time, usually things like Doctors or Diagnosis Murder!

A 12 month old baby does not need stimulating all the time and I think it is far easier to play with a baby whilst watching TV than reading a book or magazine.

I dont have a nanny but my gut feeling is that I wouldnt be happy about it. Its not awful but its not ideal either.
I think you can broach it in a nice way, perhaps suggest that she could watch tv when the baby has a nap if she wants some down time etc.
But when she is in sole charge of the kids/baby, its not what she should be doing, IMO.

I think you're being a bit petty TBH.

She was on her own with the baby - perhaps she had been playing with baby on her lap and it fell asleep or something so she watched TV while it was sleeping til you came back.

I don't think it's a biggy - I think there are a lot of other things to get yourself stressed about and as long as she isn't neglecting your kids or not getting things done I wouldn't worry.

I wouldn't like it - unless as someone else said, it was her only chance to get a break. (But I assume the baby takes a nap or two?)

I never watch daytime telly; I do plonk 13 mo in his playpen for 10 minutes at a time (2 or 3 times a day) if I really need to do something/talk on the phone, but otherwise while I'm home, I'm either playing with him, or feeding him, or he's sitting near me while I hang out washing or whatever. Of course it gets tiring always chasing after a little one - and boring too some of the time - but then I just take him out for a walk! And I would expect my nanny to do the same, tbh.

Personally, I don't really like my ds to watch much tv, because it's just crap really isn't it? Especially during the day, and loads of adverts that really catch his attention. So I wouldn't like to pay someone else to let him watch television, don't let him watch cbeebies either. I can appreciate it can be a bit boring to just be playing with a child all day, which is why I don't work as a nanny

I doubt the baby was watching the tv. I used to have the tv on sometimes while I played with my little one when she was a baby- playing with a 1 year old can get pretty boring.

I find it a bit strange that she would have the TV when you only went out with the older ones for a little while, if it were me I would have been enjoying the time getting to know the baby without everyone else around.

Secondly, I am undecided how I feel about the under 2's watching TV. I (personally) don't think it's great for them and expecially TV that is very noisy (JK, Game Shows, Enders etc) - so for that reason alone I'd say to her that I would really rather she didn't have those programs on.

The 'paid job' bit wouldn't worry me so much as I'd want my kids to have an 'as normal' time at home as they would with me. 'Helping with jobs around the house, going to the shops, learning to wait while someone's busy/on the phone etc' not having every whim catered to by a 'Paid Employee'.

I guess for me it would have come down to, did she seem to have the Tv on in the background for a bit of 'company' (I have a LOT of friends who do this - drives me nuts!!) or was she trying to watch the program and just keep the baby quiet so she could...

Nanny Diaries make me shudder....

Having read the other replies, and thought about it for a bit, I think she shouldn't be have been watching tv. A 12 month old can be played with and stimulated.

Was it around lunchtime, though? Most nannies don't get a proper lunch break and have to fit it in around the children and nap times. I would find it difficult to ask a nanny not to watch TV if it was her only chance to get a break during the day - and not much of a break at that, as she still had the baby on her knee. Having said that, I would not be happy if she was watching anything loud or violent. If she was on her own in the house when she was watching Jeremy Kyle, I also don't see the problem. Presumably she could still get on with ironing or cooking or whatever during that time - I know I certainly do! Maybe I'm just very relaxed with my nannies!

Yes - its inappropriate. I dont mind Cbeebies being on for my kids for a bit (judiciously spread out so nanny can get stuff done like making their lunch/cleaning up after dinner) or nanny watching tv while they're having their naps, but wouldnt expect her to watch tv while looking after the kids. Definitely do a diary with your nanny (I still do with ours - and she's been with us over 3 years now - more so we both know what the kids have been up to during the day and night) which will give you an idea of what they're doing.