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Original poster

How much do your parents help?

54 replies

Lizita · 11/07/2005 23:12

I always think my parents have been really helpful in terms of babysitting. They are my most frequent evening babysitters (i.e. I put dd to bed at theirs then out i go) and they have also got up for me in the morning and had her till the afternoon a few times. But i keep hearing about grandparents who seem to take on child care so much more! My mum doesn't work Wednesdays and dd and i normally go and stay that day & night every week to spend time with her. But unless we actually go out, my mum spends most of that time cooking or she'll take dd round the shops for half hour but that's it. (I appreciate the cooking, don't get me wrong, but it doesn't have to be anything special!!) Also, whenever I'm there I tend to be the one chasing around after dd and i feel like i should be able to relax a bit and let her grandparents take over! At the same time I feel guilty feeling like this, and absolutely loathe asking for help (i.e. babysitting - getting better at it though). I know they love spending time with dd but because they never actually offer I can't help feeling guilty.

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dyzzidi · 12/07/2005 16:23

My mum will not mind any of her grandchildren. She has 15 of them and says you have these children you look after them! I don't blame her really as a lot of members of my family would really take advantage if she let them.

There have only been a few exceptions and that is literally when there is nobody else and people have been in hospital.

Any help you get should be appreciated as some people don't get any.

Gem13 · 12/07/2005 16:19

No help here. No babysitting, bathing, changing nappies,etc.

Both sets are older grandparents (late 60s, early 70s) but fit and mobile.

Neither live close by and when they come to stay will read a story, fetch a drink, keep an eye on one child while I'm sorting out the other one but that's it.

I don't mind really. Have a helpful DH and we do a lot together.

tabitha · 12/07/2005 16:15

Not meaning to sound nasty but I think that you're very lucky to have parents who babysit as much as they do. I know that some grandparents do babysit more but lots and lots, for various reasons, babysit much less than yours do.
Also perhaps when you are your dd are at your mums, she maybe feels that as if she doesn't want to take-over looking after your dd if you are there. Have you spoken to her about this?
My mother babysits once a fortnight for me for dd3 during the day as I can't find childcare for that particular day (funny working patter ) and that's it apart from very occasional evenings (like maybe once every six months) and during the school Summer holidays when she is very good at having ds at her house for a few days. In laws and my father to even less, practically nothing.
To be honest, I don't think that it is right for people to expect their parents to act as full-time or almost full-time childcare for them. Ffs their parents have lives and other interests and their own jobs as well.

Lasvegas · 12/07/2005 16:01

My mum is 4 hour drive from me. She comes for long weekend every 6/7 weeks at her insistance so that she can spend time with DD. She will babysit in eve including giving a bath, and breakfast next day and watch DD in afternoon while I go to supermarket. But she makes digs about the fact that I don't want to spend 24/7 with DD. I work full time and she thinks this is bad and that at w/e I should spend every minute with DD and never relax myself. If I wanted to go to cinema she wouldn't sit in day time but agrees when it is supermarket. So I get some help but the emotional battering doesn't make up for it!

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