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Original poster

Boff needs chocolate. Nanny has just resigned.

185 replies

SnowyBoff · 03/12/2009 21:38

So folks, there we were being nice, supportive employers to someone who frankly with hindsight has a major attitude problem, and she's just resigned on us and leaves in a fortnight. I am sure Christmas is a brilliant time to look for a new one (not).

This nanny thing is so angst-ridden it's untrue. It also means we may have sacrificed another agency fee for a mere 10 weeks' work as well. And the kids will be really upset and go all funny on us for a bit because they will be so confused about everything.

I am not a happy Boff.

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K75 · 24/12/2009 21:13

Happy Christmas - hope you get this sorted. Nothing more stressful.

K75 · 24/12/2009 21:12

Happy Christmas - hope you get this sorted. Nothing more stressful.

Blondeshavemorefun · 24/12/2009 19:47

fab -glad you got mp for a few weeks

if you cant have me,the she will do xxxx

Original poster
SnowyBoff · 24/12/2009 17:00

Happy Christmas everyone, by the way, and thanks for all your support over the last little while about all this.

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Original poster
SnowyBoff · 24/12/2009 16:59

Have just booked Mary Poppins for a few weeks in Jan/Feb while we find our feet. Hope that works.

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Blondeshavemorefun · 24/12/2009 10:21

def dont offer the wrong person

agree with k75 - can you not see if mary poppins can come after she has travelled - or is she away for 6/12mths

K75 · 23/12/2009 21:36

Why not offer her a permanent post after her travels? Sorry can't remember if you said how long she's off for. You could then get a temp to cover. Just a thought.

Original poster
SnowyBoff · 23/12/2009 21:31

OK, nanny did a few hours today as a trial and we reckon she's not really for us. Nice person and all that, but not quite enough attention to detail, so I have a feeling I'd be picking up after her a fair bit. Thinking of having the Mary Poppins temp for a few weeks while we regroup. Not ideal because I would miss a week of work, but probably better than taking the wrong person.

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Original poster
SnowyBoff · 22/12/2009 22:13

MollieO, it's not just those with school aged children - that's not actually the issue here, it's the fact I work in education myself, so can't just drop everything and stop lecturing just so my nanny gets a cheaper holiday! I would end up without a job!

Another thing is, I advertised this job as having slightly higher holidays than normal, but I specified that they must be taken in term time, so there's no big mystery about all this.

Sometimes people get 99% of the way through the interview and then announce airily at the end "Oh, I have booked two holidays in the next four months so I will be off then" or whatever.

A previous candidate had booked three two-week holidays in term time in a total six or seven months and was apparently surprised when I responded with, "Well, as I said in the ad, I am afraid this is no good for us, so we would not be able to hire you on that basis, as you would be away 25% of the time we needed you".

It does make you wonder.

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MollieO · 22/12/2009 21:50

A holiday in term time would be of no concern for those with pre-school children so not a complete surprise. Appreciate that it doesn't help you though. I think children are pretty adaptable and it would be better to try and get the right permanent nanny, even if it takes longer, than to settle for a nanny that doesn't sound a good fit for you.

Blondeshavemorefun · 22/12/2009 21:48

i sometimes book holidays in term time as

1)much cheaper
2) more likely to have no/less children at hotel - as much as i love children, on holidays i cant stand having a child sit at my feet/sunbed and whine all day as bored/sunburnt etc

Original poster
SnowyBoff · 22/12/2009 21:40

sorry, no not know!
Watching Paradox whilst typing!

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BAUBLEnod · 22/12/2009 21:28

Oooooooooooooo Boff, I wondered where you'd got to - get your bum back to the April mums thread

Poor you by the way - I can't believe what bad luck you've had with nannies

Original poster
SnowyBoff · 22/12/2009 21:24

Temp is booked up and then going travelling for a bit. I already asked if she would be interested in trying out the post with a view to it becoming permanent, but her plans were already very well established and she said know.

I suppose we could have the temp for 5 or so weeks and then start the new nanny off after she had had her holiday in early Feb, but there's a risk she might accept another job in the meantime. Plus I am not sure how unsettled the kids would be by this.

Not keen to pay for holidays in term time because that's what we are basically hiring her for - she is less use to us in the school holidays as I take a lot of time off myself then, plus she would get the whole of August off anyway, plus more than a week at Xmas and Easter, so she'd end up with 10+ weeks' holiday that year. In addition to this, covering 3 weeks' extra holiday pay would leave us £1500 out of pocket in temp costs.

It's not the first nanny we have interviewed who has announced at interview that she has pre-booked loads of holidays in term time - it's a bit baffling why they do this, IMO.

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Blondeshavemorefun · 22/12/2009 18:34

why cant temp nanny stay longer than 6 weeks?

or is she already booked up for work/starting perm job?

K75 · 22/12/2009 18:20

If you have an uneasy feeling and 3 weeks for someone looking for a permanent post doesn't bode well; I would hang on for someone better. Really don't understand why you can't convert the temp/offer her a good deal. Use your gut instincts; so far has meant I have questioned myself to death but have so far only hired good nannies.

K75 · 22/12/2009 18:18

If you have an uneasy feeling and 3 weeks for someone looking for a permanent post doesn't bode well; I would hang on for someone better. Really don't understand why you can't convert the temp/offer her a good deal. Use your gut instincts; so far has meant I have questioned myself to death but have so far only hired good nannies.

Blondeshavemorefun · 22/12/2009 15:58

when i started my current job 3.5years ago i had 3 weeks booked off the next year (but was wedding/honeymoon)

my mb obv honoured this,plus they were off skiing the week before so i had a month off

tbh i didnt expect to be paid for the 3rd week, but the 2 were my choice out of 4

but did get paid

maybe say that she gets paid for 2 and takes other as unpaid, but obv doesnt get any more her choice holiday

ilovesprouts · 22/12/2009 08:59

bump

FabIsGettingReadyForXmas · 22/12/2009 08:40

I wouldn't take the nanny on who has booked a holiday because she is live out. Why add more stress to your life. Having a nanny is meant to make things easier for you.

Try not to rush in to employing someone, hang in there for someone who is just right for you.

nannynick · 21/12/2009 22:47

Could you ask the temp if they would consider becoming permanent.

Possible permanent booking holiday in advance is understandable, they may have booked it a while back, even prior to leaving/being made redundant from their last job.

Summersoon · 21/12/2009 22:39

The prebooked holiday would not be a deal-killer for me if everything else was absolutely right - though I think that you are quite within your rights to say that some or all of it will have to be taken as unpaid leave. (I assume that this holiday would be taken before the new nanny had built up a holiday entitlement.) However, after all the nonsense you have gone through, I do think that you should be very careful before hiring the next person. In your shoes I would stick with the temp and take time to find the right person. And I would be absolutely scrupulous about checking references and asking probing questions. Good luck!

Original poster
SnowyBoff · 21/12/2009 22:21

She's hours and hours away, so I think I will just ask her to post them back.

DS2 was funny today. He said, "Mummy, when you get the next nanny you need to choose one who doesn't just want the money and then will run off". However overall the boys are being pretty OK about it now, although they do keep checking it wasn't their fault.

Have now interviewed a possible permanent one, but she would be live out, so this would reduce the hours quite a lot whilst increasing the cost - extra strain on me basically. I am a bit nervous about this. Plus she has booked three weeks' holiday in term time over the next few months, and while this is understandable on one level, we would need a temp for those periods, adding even more to the cost (I suppose we could offer unpaid leave but it would look a bit mean, I think). What are people's thoughts?

I liked the temp more than this potential permanent one, and would regret not being able to have her here for a few weeks, because she really was outstanding. I am a bit in a quandary.

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FabIsGettingReadyForXmas · 21/12/2009 16:39

Which books were they?

has she taken the ones she bought as well as your?

I would just go round and get them, not ring and ask.

Blondeshavemorefun · 21/12/2009 16:37

fab you have found mary poppins - but be warned she doesnt start singing to birds/walking on rooftops

there was a thread ages ago but someone employing her - was very funny to read

why can she only stay 6 weeks? does she have another job to go to?

least gives you a breather and who knows what the NY will bring

regards cook books, ringthe thief ex nanny and ask for them back

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