Nanny playing radio loud during day

I banned all radio/background noise when DS1 was born. I'd read that background noise can interfere with speach development. I think DH was probably a tad annoyed, and thought I was a bit bonkers, but went along with it. I still wont' have the radio on during breakfast etc.

I think you'd be quite reasonable to ask your nanny not to paly the radio during meal,but to wait untill she's clearing away. She'll probably think you're bonkers, but will probably go along with it, especially if you mention the language development side of things.

Baby Talk by Dr Sally Ward has something in it it about the negative effects of background noise.

Actually - a combination of those 2 would be a complete nightmare!!!

Russell even???

Or do you mean Ross???

I would like to clarify. I don't think there is anything wrong with asking her to turn it down or even off at meal time or wind down before bedtime. I just thought it would be a bit unresaonable to say never ever listen to it.

And... I don't know what they were listening to. If it was Johnathan Brand than I'm sure I would agree with banning it.

the huntrees....

yes our perks may be good... (today i was paid to spend the afternoon in my bikini eating ice lollies playimg in the pool and sprinkler)..
but the "opposite of perks (word has left my head at the moment) are extream too...who else works 12 hours with NO BREAK at all, often even being accompanied to go to the loo?....

BUT in answer to your OP i dont think its unreasonable... it wouldnt even occur to me to tune into the radio while the children are present (except for fun kids and ceebeies on bbc radio 7; even in the car we have our kids CD's (or musicals such as Joseph / Mama Mia! or Disney)

my charges (unless ill or an extranous circumstance) do not watch TV at all (before bath), and would NEVER have it on while eating (its one of my pet hates) and equally when we are listening to the radio it is off at meal times. (we pause it)

I DO NOT thing YABU to ask her to turn it down and actually i dont think u would be unreasonable to ask her to turn it right off (and am surprised that so many people think you are)

I agree with both.

Also the word ' interaction' it there to make parents and childcarers constantly guilty.
As if you should read books or count for 12 hrs. In my book dancing a bit in the kitcen -to any type of music- is a very good interaction ( fun, co-ordination, exercise...[wink).

I know Lacquitar. I have done both and, of course they are very different, but it's still a working environment. Of course a nanny can't get up and go to Starbucks and actually I'd love to work in the office that you vould get away with doing that. But you are still entitle to a certain amount of (if tiny) breaks in your working day. Otherwise you are working as I was from 7.45am till 7pm. Are you saying that every second of that time should be given over to interaction with the child? That's ridiculous. So you find what works in your situation and, as Athene says, pick your battles.

I don't think it's about nanny's rights to sit down, relax, or anything else. I would never stand up in the middle of the day and say "I'm off to Starbuck's. Back in 30." That's crazy.

But...

I do think it is just common courtesy to let the nanny get on with the job you hired her to do. I think you have to choose your battles or you could spend your whole day picking apart the nanny's performance because it's not exactly as you would do it. But, I think that if you want this level of control over your child's day then this whole work full-time put DD in childcare is probably not for you. Sometimes you hae to step back and let nanny do it her way just because everyone (including butnot limited to nanny) will be happier.

To me, pop music is not a battle I would choose to take on. Now if she was feeding my kids junk food first thing in the morning, now that is a battle in which I would engage.

I guess it depends what is important to you. Just don't fight every battle or you'll be looking for a new nanny (often).

I wouldn't want my DC's to listen to certain radio stations - more to do with the 'presenters' rather than the music - although I'd never heard the unedited version of a Lilly Allen song until my APs boyfriend was playing it loudly in the car .

I, personally, cannot see a problem with pop music, both my DCs are (and have been all their lives) exposed from everything from opera to pop - I know which they prefer!

I wouldn't want it so loud that conversation couldn't take place, mealtimes are social encounters. We save loud music for singing in the car at tops of voices.

I don't want to sound sexist but i 've noticed that is usually dads who say things like this. Did he ever do full time childcare? If so does he 'interacts' with dd 12 hours non stop? Anyway as others said music IS interaction and some dancing around the kitchen table is fun.

Those who compare nannying with office job, i ll say that if you want to compare it then imagine your nanny telling you 'i'm going to sturbucks for half hour. on my own'. Of course she wont! I could give you a list of 100 other differences. Yes they are both jobs, but very different to each other.

But tommypickles, to the nanny, it is a job. It might be your pfb or whatever and of course a nanny is there to do her/his job but we are all entitled to certain things in our working environment, be it 10 minutes to have a coffee mid morning, or time away from the computer if we work at a pc all day. I see the radio as part of that tiny bit of freedom at work and you do get that in an office. It's unreasonable to demand that every moment of a nanny's day should be dictated by the employer.

I don't think it's particularly weird to not like pop music and not want it blaring over mealtimes tbh.There's nothing at all wrong with a bit of quiet, silence doesn't always have to be remedied.

But, like I said, I'm hypersensitive to noise, so am biased.

Perhaps she just doesn't realise it's loud? Individual tolerance levels vary quite dramatically.

would the op dh be happy with music on but a different station? or is it the fact music/noise is on?

is it really that loud?

you really changed your music tastes to please him?

some people like the quiet and peace - i guess i dont

Tell her to retune to Radio 3. That way your dh can relax in the knowledge that his lo's brain is being protected from the pernicious influence of pop music.

"But I've lived with this my whole relationship with him and had to 'adjust' my musical tastes."

Why?

im the same as limonchik - the radio is back ground noise to me, in an office you get other peoples chatter, in a house it is quiet, esp if have a small untalking child

obv you respect your mb/db views, as yes they are your employer, but if i was to be told i couldnt have the radio on, i would seriously consider leaving and to work for someone who wasnt that anal weird

I would guess though that its the same as any job - a reasonable request from your boss you'd go along with. However something that seems a bit odd is going to be met with some degree of bewilderment/pissed off-ness.

I'm a SAHM and always have the radio on in the day - switch between radio1 and radio4 so children get a broad education .

Sounds from OP that its just her DH is a bit odd regarding music. As long as its not gangsta-rap i'm not sure what the problem is really.

I guess i'd be wary of pissing of a nanny who i really rated over something that seems quite trivial.

What I was trying to say was that, rather than complaining about the nanny's choice in radio station, they could SAY they thought it was a bit loud and overstimulating.

Sorry, don't express myself too well. No brain left.

It's their house and their child. They are perfectly entitled to ask her to turn it down or off. I wouldn't be happy about my baby listening to, say, Radio 1, I find it unbearable these days, anymore than I would be happy for my baby to be plonked in front of Hollyoaks. It's personal taste.If the DH doesn't want his DD subjected to that kind of music, it's up to him!

I wasn't refering to you.

What I'm trying to say is that the parents are your employers....so surely they have a say on what happens in their home whilst your with their children, it's just ridiculous.

Like I said you wouldn't be so quick to make all your demands if you worked in an office etc

I don't have the radio on to relax or zone out, I like to have background noise and it doesn't impede my work at all. And I agree with spicemonster - exactly what are you supposed to be doing to interact with a 2 year old who's eating, beyond a little bit of chat/encouragement? Having the radio on doesn't stop you doing that.

At the risk of being strung up.................Is it not the nannies job to take care of the children, interact with them, basically do what has been agreed with the employer, is this not what she gets paid to do.

I find it more than a little odd that when people work with children they seem to think that this means they can do as please all day long, when they themselves will be the first to tell you that it is a proper job and they do actually work and work very hard.

To say as a nanny you would feel "put out" and "need time to relax" and "zone out time" is bizare!!! If a nanny of mine was continually "zone-ing out" then I'd get one that didn't.

Correct me if I'm wrong but don't parents take on a nanny to care for their child/children not to give them a comfortable place to hang out in doing as they please at the parents expense.

If you worked in an office would you be so quick to kick up a stick about not having the radio on?

And being "put out" is exactly why we get paid for jobs......it's called work for a reason.

FYI: I am also in childcare, so I do know what I'm talking about, but I do what the parents would like me to do.

"As a nanny she should understand that the noise may cause your DD to become overstimulated?"

Is he actually complaining that the child is overstimulated though, or just that he doesn't like the nanny's taste?

If she has it on very loudly then I should think it would be fine to turn it down. I wonder if it's actually that loud though, or if the DH just saying that because he doesn't like pop.

Hmmm. As someone who themselves is hypersensitive to noise, I can definitely see where he's coming from. Too much noise CAN be overstimulating. I love having the house peaceful in the daytime, and then DP comes home for lunch and has the telly blaring and I can't bear it.

However, I realise I'm a big freak and in the minority. Just ask her to turn it down a bit? As a nanny she should understand that the noise may cause your DD to become overstimulated?

I have been a nanny btw so talking from bith sides of the fence

I would have been seriously pissed off if my employer had said anything to me in these circumstances. Maybe volume is an issue but certainly not the station as long as it's not offensive. I don't think you can dictate what she has on either, i.e. force her to listen to Classic. Yes she is there to care for your dd and cater to her every whim but it's also her working environment and you have to have a little bit of personal freedom otherwise you'd go nuts. I don't see why it is an issue to have the radio on during the day? I do if I'm at home and I'm sure other parents do so why should it be different for a nanny?