Would you be offended if your childminder didn't invite you to her wedding?

We were at our c/minders wedding last September - as were all her mindees

We had a fab day!!

I wouldn't have been offended if we hadn't been asked though!! We were quite shocked to be invited...

I agree that it depends on the relationship. I think that comparing to a boss at work is a bit different as the service is much more personal. In the past I wouldn't have invited parents but I just so happen to have a very good and close relationship with at least 3 of my families. I'm apparantly a 2nd mummy to their DCs One family invited me over for birthday cake on mindee's birthday. It was a little hard to fit in as it happens to be my birthday the same day, but they refer to my family as extended family and I felt it right to be there.

It really really does depend on your relationship with them imo, have a think about them individually and see what you think. If you have a good relationship but not an especially close one where you get together outside of the childminding then I wouldn't invite them. If, like me, you have some you go to dinner with, have parties with, get together as friends outside of childminding then that would be different.

Good luck hun, I know how excited you are about it all (sorry not been on msn much lately, bloomin laptop!! grrr) xx

I looked after a little boy once, his mother handed him to me as she walked through the front door from the hospital and said she was going for a long hot shower and didn't want to see either of us for the next two hours . I looked after him 7.30 till 7.00 every day with neither hide nor hair of the mother and I came in on one Monday to find he'd been christened on the Sunday, big do, loads of people and not a fecking word to me. I was pissed off over that one.

To put it in perspective, in my previous family who were friends of the above, I was godmother to their youngest dd. She and her sister were then bridesmaids at my wedding. Probably unusual but I was very close to all of the children from both families.

In short, depends on your relationship I guess.

i was bridesmaid at my nannies wedding, when i was six. it was fan-tastic.

but then she had had me for six years. and she maintains to this day that she got married mainly so i could be a bridesmaid.

i still send her mothers day cards - completely different situ, but thought i'd share!

No.

But I would hope she saved me a piece of cake.

No, I wouldn't. Some people sort of think they have a 'right' to attend your wedding. Those people should be slapped soundly with a cold, wet fish.

Happy Wedding!

YES i'd be highly offended

ha ha ha not really

i'd hate to be invited but would feel obliged to go IYSWIM.

Wouldn't and didn't occur to me to invite any of my parents or mindees to our wedding tbh.

It would have felt like being at work,can't think of anything worse lol.

No though I did invite one of my families (not bosses but clients!) to my dd christening but that is because ds asked if x could come to play at the party.

Unless you were friends with them, then no. My Mum was good friends with many of the families she cm'ed for and they got invited to family things, but then, they were good friends, the ones who she didn't get along with as well weren't invited, no reason to be!

No.

But I should add that I currently hate attending weddings!!

NO

(but when i eventually one day get married i would love all my charges to be there )

As a cm, I have been to mindies parents wedding , and when our DD got married, we invite all parents and the older children to the evening do. We also included past mindies and parents who had invited us to mindies christenings/confirmations even tho I no longer cared for the children.

I think each family need to be concidered individually, but that is just my opinion.

You are absolutely right not to invite them. It's your day, and if you even remotely feel like you might feel a bit responsible for them, and have to 'look after' parents and play with kids then that should be enough to put you off. Obviously if you want to play with kids during your wedding day then that's fine, but you don't want to be in a situation where you feel you have obligations.

Plus you should be able to completely relax and enjoy yourself. I totally understand what you mean about professional self being different to your private self. I repeat, this is your day, make sure it stays that way!

that sounds like you were friends first though before you were her cm.. different ..
I like all my parents but we are not on social terms of friendships.. wouldnt like that as could muddy professional relationship..

well i think yes i would we are supposed to offer a home to home environment and your wedding is going to have a impact on those children you care for so yes i would invite them in fact my childminder (before i was a childminder) was my bridesmaid for good sake, we had a fantastic relationship she was like another mother to my children.

i cant beleive the majority state no im truly shocked!

Yeah, alright. Don't get your knickers in a knot. They are self employed, providing services to you then.

Enjoy your day. If anyone gets offended about not getting invited, then they're being precious

Nope but would insist on a bit of cake though

No. But we are invited to the pre-wedding drinks for our cm's eldest daughter.

Which is lovely but it's true we won't know anyone there.

I'm glad it's just the drinks cos I'd be a bit embarrassed to be invited to the whole lot.

I would HATE them to feel they had to do it.

No,infact I would probably be relieved, I hatre going to weddings where you hardly know anyone.

wouldn't !!!

No, not remotely.

I would expect an invite from her, nor would I have invited her to my own wedding

no

and Jennipenni beaten me to it!
now repeat after me everybody...

Childminders are SELF EMPLOYED - they are not employees!

No.