Page 2 | Au pair couples

PixiNanny · 2009-04-19T19:00:14+00:00

Me and my partner are looking at au pair coupling from next March onwards, I was wondering if any of you guys know of some websites where I can find couple work?

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Millarkie · 17/06/2009 15:24

Pixi - I've spoken to dh - the lack of driving is an issue (as Squiffy said - we have space for a couple because we live in countryside, but 2 non-drivers would mean a lack of flexibility. The other thing dh pointed out is that sailing club is on Sundays and climbing is a weekend trip (up to peak district and camp overnight generally) and we are mean enough to ask APs to work at weekends
Other issue at the moment is that our new AP arrives next week and although she is meant to stay until next spring we are going to be a lot less tolerant of madness with this one (search for the thread - 'au pair woes' to read about current situation) so don't want to assume she will last that long until at least a month in.
(Looks like you'll be off to Squiffys anyway )

Original poster

PixiNanny · 17/06/2009 14:01

Thank you

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Squiffy · 17/06/2009 13:07

OK will drop you a line tonight.

Original poster

PixiNanny · 17/06/2009 10:52

Squiffy: I like the sound of the job, I'd be happy if you sent an email my way: nixinox [at] hotmail [dot] com

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Original poster

PixiNanny · 17/06/2009 10:32

I'm going for manual because my current families AP car is a manual. And also it just makes it easier as I've learnt in a manual and I don't want to learn in a different car. I am a decent driver (I should hope so with the amount of lessons I've had! Lol) but I just keep doing silly little things on the test which obviously I can't get away with as I'm supposed to show that I'm perfect Just common driving mistakes that everyone does, doesn't bother me too much as I'm not too fussed about driving (I'd prefer public transport, better for the environment and cheaper!) but I would like to pass just so that I can arrange mine and my two's days a bit better this summer, and not have to worry about how to get places with them, as they get ill on PT

I'm offering to be an AP Couple, not a nanny. I will be qualified yes, and that is an asset to me which is why I put it down, but I also state somewhere that I want to share the responsibilities with my partner, which is truly what I want to do, I want to work with him and alongside him and he wants to work with kids too, which is why I'm looking for a AP couple job rather than a 'me nanny, him gardener/housekeeper' job

I was trying to joke about the housework in a "kidding but not kidding too" inda way but I can see how it comes across badly, it's on my list of things to edit I've also been trying to do more housework where I am now too, just so I can get used to it and get it into my routine, though I admit I've been working on this for a few months now! It's slowly getting easier and more habitual!

I tried APWorld but they're causing me a lot of grief, if you're on Nanny Job there's a thread in which I'm complaining about their treatment of me if you're curious lol. Basically though, after weeks of no answers or help I called them and the woman started telling me that I obviously don't want to be an au pair because I want to travel and refused to listen to me, told me to email her instead(?) and then insisted that I make Andy a separate profile (which I've not seen another couple do before?!) so I gave up lol though it is one of the better sites for getting work and I'm quite annoyed about it still!

I hadn't thought about boarding schools, though I didn't think schools were allowed to do outdor pursuit sports for PE or anything? :/ I'll definately look into it though

& Andy doesn't drive, we're hoping he can learn when he gets home from PGL in November (by doing a quick course, as he already did a course in the army but failed his theory), I'll look into your profile though

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Squiffy · 17/06/2009 09:25

People who live in cities (and don't need drivers) will generally live in smaller houses where they would feel 'overwhelmed' by two extra people, so might not want a couple. Couples will be wanted usually by rural folk (as in that advert).So driving is essential. Why not try to pass on an automatic licence only - if such things still exist - and then try to get a full manual licence later?

Then, what are you offering? For you to be a proper nanny all week (only doing the children's clothes etc) makes sense, but then what is your boyfriend to be? People willing to take couples will only do so if either they are overun with too many children (which cuts your potential market hugely), or if they can find some mix of nanny/housekeeper/handyman/gardener. I think your line about not wanting to do housework is possibly putting people off - most people wanting an AP couple will do so precisely because they want all their housework covered by one of you - otherwise they need to employ the pair of you and a cleaner on top which just gets too complicated. I have had a full time nanny (live-out) and an Au Pair at the same time and I would have struggled to find enough to keep them busy if I hadn't included all the family ironing and similar household chores into the mix. You might get lucky and find a big family, but otherwise you might have to accept that housework will be part of a couple package..

Other than that I think your profile looks pretty good. Have you put it into APW as well as GAP?

Maybe you should think a bit laterally: Your skills don't naturally dovetail into an au pair couple role, but have you thought about approaching boarding schools directly to see if there are any live-in roles for a carer and sports assistant/sailing assistant? That might open up a route you hadn't thought of.

FWIW, If you still want to go down nanny/AP route then I will have a vacancy in Jan (new AP due to stay until 31/12), and would pay what you are looking for, if it covered housework and if both of you could drive. We are close to lots of sailing clubs, but no mountains down here (near Whitstable). Check out my profile here. The profile is aimed at individual au pairs only, but we can expand the role to fit. DH is ex-military and a keen sportsman (rugby and triathalons) and we have a gym at home (not that you would think it to look at the pair of us... )

Original poster

PixiNanny · 16/06/2009 23:13

Oh, and also, what is it with families who are rude to you for being a couple? They just assume that you and your partner are perverts?! I had a reply from one of those too last month, it was weird

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Original poster

PixiNanny · 16/06/2009 23:11

So could I be a viable option then Millarkie?

& all, what is it with the families who say ont heir profiles that they'd accept a couple, yet when you contact them they say they don't want one? I've had no less than three emails in 24 hours from people telling me that they don't want a couple, even though their site says that they'd accept one Why lie and waste all of our time?!

I'm starting to think that I may end up staying in the UK at this rate Maybe I'll save and go gallivanting around Europe for a month or two before doing anything next year

Like the original plan and worry about it when I get back lol

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Millarkie · 16/06/2009 22:30

Hi Catepilarr - have had a look at your (v impressive) profile but we live in a village so for AP/semi-nannys mental health we need a driver (kids go to school and back on a door-to-door bus but I would worry about an AP having to rely on public transport. (maybe I worry too much, there are buses to local town and trains to big city 20 mins away).

Original poster

PixiNanny · 16/06/2009 22:20

The finnish family needed me earlier than I could go, s'pose it's okay though, I would prefer the chance to do something watersports related! Lol.

sigh I'd do anything for a watersports/outdoorsy family

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catepilarr · 16/06/2009 22:13

millarkie, i usually look for a summer job as a something in betwenn a nanny and an ap. next year i will even be available cca march to sept.
my apw profile number is 766130 in case you are interested to have a look.sorry to hijack your thread pixi but its too tempting /btw what happend to the finnish family?/

Original poster

PixiNanny · 16/06/2009 21:37

Oh I am learning, I failed a test last Weds so have to rebook again! That was test number four! I plan to have passed by Christmas (2020 maybe... :p).

Oh, I feel like a bit of a pig now lol Maybe it was because I was eating tescos super noodles mainly...? First time living away from home, thankfully I was only alone for 3 weeks before I started having my meals made for me again (PGL!) hehe

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limonchik · 16/06/2009 20:54

I don't spend £50 a week on food for me and DP! And I assume that would be for food when you're not working.

Summersoon · 16/06/2009 20:51

Me again.

If you can afford to take lessons, I would strongly recommend you learn to drive asap as it will widen enormously the number of jobs open to you in the future!

Some families simply have to have a driver, mainly to do school runs but sometimes also for other reasons.

Original poster

PixiNanny · 16/06/2009 20:37

HP Nanny? Bodyguard? That's a scary thought, I don't think I have the right attitude for a HP nanny, too free spirited

If I attempt to speak French then you'll just laugh at my attempts I beleive I know who you are on NJ though so I'll revise my French reading skills before I attempt to speak the language, though remind me to take you up on the Skype when I get a bit better!

And if I could drive and were looking for August that job would sound cushty Limonchik, though I don't know about the 4 nights a week babysitting. I know they say it's rarely used but why would they put four down if they rarely use it anyways?

That's another thing I've noticed, food allowance. Is that to cater for all of your meals? Or only lunch/evening meals? I remember living alone for a short period and spending over £50 for myself for all of my meals, let alone another person :/

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limonchik · 16/06/2009 20:01

I noticed a nice ad for an au pair couple on gumtree the other day, in the UK though. Not sure if this might interest you?

frAKKINPannikin · 16/06/2009 19:38

You know you could rake it in as an HP nanny and him as a bodyguard

I tried to persuade my DP to do it but he's wedded to the bloody Navy (not entirely sure why he's marrying me ) and wouldn't even entertain the idea. Lots and lots of travel to exciting places but also very hard work. I had an agency sound me out about the possibility when I interviewed and mentioned DP was military but unfortunately he's a career officer so can't just up and out...

And as for speaking French - in a word: SKYPE!

Original poster

PixiNanny · 16/06/2009 17:41

I thought his military bacground would be seen as a negative which is why I didn't mention it, he's not too fond on his time there and he didn't even go out on tour, but I suppose readers of the Lady would like that aspect

I will add that to my list of improvements for my profile though And do something about Andy's section, rereading it I can see wher eyou're coming from on his behalf!

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Original poster

PixiNanny · 16/06/2009 17:38

Haha, you sound like an awesome host family, very jealous of your AP! I hope she joins in the activities too?!

I'm happy to stay in the UK as long as there's something in it for me (and the outdoor pursuits is a big something for me!), and Andy's doing what I want next year, as he got to go frolick in France this year

If you are interested actually, gimme a shout, I'm open to anything that starts between Jan-April next year (I can stay in this job until April, but I want to get something elsewhere by summer, too long a stay here otherwise!). I'm nixinox on a hotmail dot com

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Summersoon · 16/06/2009 17:27

I would not emphasize the fact that you don't really know where you want to go - given your age and circumstances that is completely acceptable and even normal, in my view - but if you draw attention to this, it might send the wrong message. I would try to say "open-minded" wherever possible or specify a region if you have to.
I do think that you should emphasize what you have to offer - that goes particularly for your partner who might be a less obvious choice to look after children than you will be as a qualified nanny - but I can see how the two of you might well appeal to a sporty family with several children of both sexes and a wide age range.
By the way, I don't see why you shoudn't respond to ads in The Lady if you see something that appeals - you may be young but you are (almost) qualified and your partner has a military background which could well be seen as a signficant plus by some families.
Good luck!

Millarkie · 16/06/2009 16:30

In answer to your question - we don't paddle (I think kids are too young 7 and 5) but my nephew (early 20s) is some sort of kayak champion (travels all over the place at weekends to competitions) so it's something I'm sure the kids will get into sooner or later. We do climb (at least dh does but is desperate for a climbing partner - I won't belay him!), and the kids started climbing this summer (we have a kid harness which dd has only just got big enough for), but we do sail Dh, I and ds (not dd yet) sail dingys and yachts (although yachts only when on hols). Dingy sailing is something that we want to do a lot more of but with someone needed to be minding dd and ds only has his level 1/2 it's a bit awkward still.
You should market yourselves as nanny for kids and playmates for sailing/climbing husbands lol
(We have au pair until next March (if she's any good and she stays the full time) but would be very tempted if you wanted to stay in UK (we are near an airport which does cheap flights to europe though)

Original poster

PixiNanny · 16/06/2009 14:58

Didn't see the last bit but, if it were the reading I needed to brush up on I'd be fine, I just can't speak french at all! I can read and write it relatively well, but I can't think fast enough in conversation to actually be able to speak the language. I can listen and get brief ideas of what's being said though

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Original poster

PixiNanny · 16/06/2009 14:56

I need to get the peads first aid, looking for a course after September But otherwise we're both first aid appointed persons (8hr & 4hr) and he has some military ones I beleive too? Though they'll be out of date by now I reckon. I'll try get him to update his in Dec, he has that month off anyways

I never thought of Switzerland, but that'd be good if it has both! I'll look into areas there that commonly have both languages spoken as it'd be good for the both of us!

I don't know where I want to go really though, but I know what languages I want to learn, but I'd rather learn them outside of the countries that hold them (France or Iran, no thanks)! I like the idea of northern Europe in particular, also Eastern but I know I'd be less likely to find work there.

And depending on study opportunities, I wouldn't mind staying in the UK again too as I did this time round. I just can't decide what to do and where to go first. I'd like to spend a 9-18 months APing from Jan, if 9 months then an additional 9 elsewhere before travelling a bit or instructing a bit.

I will take all of that into account though and have a word with the Mr. Thank you

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frAKKINPannikin · 16/06/2009 14:26

Language IMO is part of cultural exchange. I think it would be good for you to put what you said about going anywhere somewhere. At the moment it comes across as though you don't know where you want to go or what language to learn and aren't really motivated to stick somewhere. Whereas if you say you want to learn Spanish then you have a good reason for staying in Spain!

What about Switzerland - depending on where you go German for him, French for you?

It does show up as au pair has 1st aid - but if you both have it that's a selling point, if it's a 12 hour paeds 1st aid that's another good point.

I don't think anyone expects you to have better than school level language skills and it's very easy to brush up on - IM me on NJ and we can practice your French

Original poster

PixiNanny · 16/06/2009 14:10

I know! I've been meaning to get rid of those bloody exclamation marks, it's not normaly my style of writing, I wasn't impressed when I realised how much exclaming I'd been doing! I'm not used to trying to sell myself though

Doesn't the 1st aid thing show up on the profile? I swear I answered a Q about that (and we do lol). I'll sort out the basic language info, I speak very basic french though, as in I learnt it at school and want to relearn it :/

He doesn't want to go to France at all really, I only put it as an option, I'll put something down as a main place, though anywhere really is open to us, especially as people speak all kinds of languages everywhere, like I had a spanish/iranian (farsi-speaking) family in spain offer me a job last year and I never would have thought of putting down spain as an option beforehand, if that makes any sense? lol

It's the main reason why I'm open to everywhere, should I state that somewhere do you think? It's the cultural exchange more than anything I'm interested in, though the languages would be amazing too! Especially if it were Farsi

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