Nannies and Xmas holidays

It's the little things that mean a lot. I was in a job once which I'd had since October. Apparently I hadn't been there long enough to accrue enough holidays to have the time off between Christmas and New Year. Then all of a sudden they decided I HAD earned three days, and gave me them off in between but I worked Christmas Eve (which meant I couldn't travel to my parents for Christmas Day as they lived at the other end of the country), even though the Mum and Dad were both off and rolling around the floor with the three children. And then, to add insult to injury, they didn't let me give the children their Christmas gifts until my official finish time had passed - ie 6.15pm - so I ended up staying late and didn't get home until 8.15pm on Christmas Eve.

Then in my next job I had officially 2 weeks of my choice and 2 weeks of theirs. I took one week of my choice, but they went away A LOT and I ended up having extra holidays of their choice. However, when it came to Christmas they wouldn't have it that I still had holidays of my choice remaining, and told me I had to work in between Christmas and NY.

So, I made plans to do some Night Nannying in London in that time, thought I might as well fill the time constructively.

Then, on my last day before Christmas they decided they didn't need me after all. So, I could've spent more precious time with my parents - but ended up having to drive back down to London the day after Boxing Day to honour my 3 nights of Night Nannying, and sitting in all day on my own because all my other nanny friends had gone home for Chritmas.

I resigned from both jobs upon my return after Christmas.

Usually I've had 28 days (flexi-banks) and christmas, but I do see this as a bonus. I have never been just given a whole day off paid at short notice (oh, except snow!). Although I would enjoy one if offered I might end up feeling guilty if it happened too often or like they might expect the same from me in someway.

I've experienced parents who wouldn't dream of having me around if they were e.g. letting me leave if they got in early. And also parents who want to do things with us- play games, take me along to doctor etc. I find this a bit stressful to be honest, even if parents are lovely. I don't see the point but they obviously do.

Then again I've had some parents who have had a day off who expect to be with their children and let me e.g. cook/laundry while others have thought this strange behaviour and insisted they do these (children's) things so the children can get the best out of the nanny's attention/activites, as that is my priority role. So everyone is different/normal.

Not all parents work anyway BUT if my job is sole charge I don't expect them to be in the house when I am there or at least completely out of sight/earshot of charges- in bed, office etc.

Lobsters

Even if you get lots of leave, you might well find it useful to give your nanny less holiday than you in the contract. If she is sick, for example, you might need to use a day of your holiday. Then if she is not sick, you can give her a "free" day off as people have discussed here.

My other tip re Xmas, especially if you are employing a nanny from far away, is to ask at interview what her plans are. I interviewed a great South African once, but she took 3 weeks' of her holidays (not 3 weeks, but 3 weeks of working days so actually over a month) over Christmas to go home every year. I would find it very difficult to take that much time off work at that time of year - once maybe as a special favour but not regularly. And if my current nanny is going to see her parents at Christmas, she needs a day off on Christmas Eve to travel there.

we do 4 weeks plus bank holidays

when we are on leave, we always let the nanny have leave so in practice, she has a lot more than 4 weeks

oh dear laquitar...and oh dear ladyg actually....
we do four weeks holiday plus bank holidays off (two weeks her choice, two weeks ours).
i get six weeks holiday a year and usually take one of these over christmas or NY (i dont automatically get any time off at xmas) but basically i feel that she shdnt have to work if im there - on the "extra" weeks i will usually ask her to come in one day so that i can go get hair cut/do stuff i cant do with ds with me (christmas shopping anyone?) and then just give her the rest off anyway. im usually so desperate for more time with ds that i cant imagine why on earth i would want her to be looking after him on my holiday while i was lolling about surfing the net...
so she actually gets loads more holiday than is in the contract. but i find its worth it as a way of keeping her happy - goodwill always worth having..

LaQuitar

a nanny friend of mine worked Xmas eve 2008(though was allowed to go early for the one and only time that year)

Not only were both parenst around and at home, but so were both sets of grandparents...

if she wanted the day off it needed to come out of her holiday (she can choose 8 days a year) and had already used one of those days to attend her grandmothers funeral (she could have taken the funeral unpaid if she had chosen too)

Like jura 4 weeks plus bank holidays plus time b/t Xmas and New Year. I think a lot of nannies 'expect' this time off however so don't expect them to be grateful for that (or not to resign 6 weeks later 10 days before you are due to go back to work after mat leave [bitter emoticon])

lol Blondes.
Well read this then.

I was working once xmas eve. Both parents home watching tv, surfing, making endless cups of tea (and mess). Ok so far.

Baby used to sleep for 2 hours in the afternoon. I put him to bed at 3pm. I suppose to finish 5pm. So i said to them that baby asleep, prob for 2 hours, so can i go since is f...ing xmas eve and havnt even done my shopping? And dad replied in a panicky voice: But what if he wokes up before i.e quarter to 5?

And i replied: If he does i can promise you he doesnt bite

excalty

obv if the parents need to do stuff, then yes the nanny may need to go in,but prehaps to work shorter hours or be there while the parent is out, then go home

my friend works 12hr days and even on those 3 days she still did 7-7 and both mb/db were there, and didnt go out,just lolled in front of tv/in bed till 1pm!!!

i would have said something, maybe like, i will be in tomorrow at 8.30 so that you can leave for shops at 9 - but thats just me

I guess if they need to go to a busy shopping centre and have 2 or more children i wouldnt mind. But i have worked those days when both parents at home surfing the net! It is very annoying

no - actually meant it to harriet,as she picked up on it from my post

i have had friends work dec 27,28, 29 etc and BOTH parents there

why cant they spend time with their own children? christmas is about children, (as well as jesus)obv if the parents have to work, then so does the nanny - but if they do have time off, then its nice to give it to the nanny as well

I dont know if last comment was for me but yes i agree re xmas

my comment about nannying working when parents are off and being mean - was meant to be over the xmas holiday - thats mean

obv if the parents has a day off to do whatever/doctors/etc then the nanny would work - as it would be a normal day for her

but as often the child would want to be with their parents, and quite rightly so - if you havent got to do anything, then yes its nice to give nanny 1/2day/day off paid and do something with your child

I think it is fine to have day off and still have the nanny (you need to do stuff or even to rest) but i wouldnt do it all the time. I would sometimes offer her the day off as a 'gift' and 'thank you'. it just keeps the nanny happy and the relatioship good.

What i really hate - and i think most nannies do- is the attidute ' oh since i pay the nanny, i MUST use her'.

Also Lobsters - If you want to spend time with your baby then your nanny will be delighted but if you do decide to give her the day off please try to give her some notice - I worked for a mum who would phone me at 8am (I started at 8:15) that she didn't need me as she had decided to take the day off, which is fine of course they are her children BUT I had always got up, showered and dressed (couldn't go back to bed after I'd showered!) and we generally had plans with friends or classes which I then had to cancel. Slightly annoying, especially when we had planned a day out at Chessington one day, picnic was made, car was packed and then I had to go to Chessington childless!!!! My nanny friends didn't mind as it was another pair of hands with the children. My charges on the other hand were so upset when they realised they missed it!

i have always had minium of 5 weeks- 2 my choice, 2 theirs and a week bewteen christmas and NY

but i am also the exception

Blondes - Not the only exception!! I also have 5 weeks holiday as part of my contract, 2 weeks my choice, 2 weeks of employers choice and a week at christmas.

My bosses are currently away for 4 weeks and I didn't go with them so 2 weeks will be part of their choice and the other 2 weeks are extra paid holiday, I will still have two weeks of my choice later in the year.

In our case because it is so much time relatively speaking we have discussed it at interview.NO one has said they've minded, but if they did they could also not take the job. DH can't be expected to skulk around out of the house for ten hours for the many weeks he is home and he does get on with stuff as well - sheds and all that sort of thing.

For the odd day off, I can't think it would be that much of a big deal.

yes but the nanny might feel a bit in the way or a bit of a spare part with her employer there too, they must prefer not to have the boss around all the time

What a strange idea that just because you have a day off from work it's "mean" to expect the nanny to work. You could need a day off for all sorts of reasons and even if the idea is you're doing some sort of activity with the children for part of that time, you could still need a spare pair of hands. It's not like she wouldn't be getting paid for it. Our previous nannies have ended up with around 8 wks a year off paid, plus other days at half days, as DH is a teacher. But no one has so far questioned why he might need some help on the other weeks he is home.

Just want to clarify that Nee's comment about 28 days which can include bank hols is the same as 4 weeks plus bank hols (since there are 8 bank hols). This is obviously prorated if she is not 5 days a week.

I give 4 week plus bank hols.
xmas time is part of her 4 weeks / bank hols.
We agree the dates when I write the contract and I ask her to work with the school breaks.

If I take a day off work and she is working, I will ask her to catch up on some nannie duties (like tidying clothes or toys) while I take the kids out and have a bit mum and kids time. Or DH and I might have a kid free day out (as we did this past Tuesday). You shouldn't feel guilty or mean about this. You are entitled to a holiday too if you want one. If the nanny was totally caught up on all her duties then I'd just give her the day off. But, this is rarely (if ever) the case.

extra paid time off is fab

thought tbh I am not sure I would swap a day for a night - but thats just me

i am very happy to do nights and do them often, but I prefer to be paid

you do sound lovely and caring (just like my mb) and sure you will find a lovely nanny

Paid time off is great and flexibility with your nanny means she's less likely to be annoyed about overnight care. I'd do it - you sound lovely!