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inappropriate boss behaviour

35 replies

marypoppins2 · 18/03/2009 21:09

Hi there,
Just wanted to test the water on this one and get some feed back from any nannies out ther. Mums please feel free to also offer your opinions.
I have had my boss constantly phoning me in the evenings and weekends for ridiculous reasons like 'do I know where the kids socks are' or 'hi what you doing at the moment' or being bored on a saturday when her husband isn't home and instead of phoning one of the many friends she says she has calls me and if I don't answer sends me several text messages.
I told her that my evenings and weekends are my own and the only reason she needs to call me is in an absolute emergency or on Sunday night to change what time I need to be in on Monday. When she heard this she hit the roof and ranted on about not meeting her needs. I explained that I'm not her pa, gal pal or housekeeper. If she wants to have a girlie chat call a friend. I keep the house tidy all week so if she can't find something at the weekend it's because she's lost it Saturday morning so I would have no idea where it is.
I've been nannying for 15 years and have never come up against this before. I've always had a good relationship with previous bosses and communication has been good but they have respected that I work a long day and my time is my time.
Anyone out there met with anything like this ?

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Ebb · 19/03/2009 21:02

She sounds a complete and utter nightmare! You are better off out of there. Hope she pays you and hope you find a nice family to work for next.

marypoppins2 · 19/03/2009 19:49

Thanks for the replies and it's nice to know that I'm not the only one who thinks she's barking mad. I was at my godson's christening this last weekend and purposely turned my phone off as I knew she would call. When I turned it on around 2 o clock on Sunday afternoon she had left me 8 messages the last one saying if you don't call me back by 3 o clock consider yourself fired. We then had a huge text battle back and forth with me politely explaining it was my weekend and she had no right to call. The only reason she was calling anyway was to see if I'd be in on Monday. I wrote back in 7 months of working for you have I ever given you any reason to worry about my punctuality. If there was a problem I would have called you.
She told me to finish the week and that was it.
When I got home and checked my contract it said she had to give me 4 weeks written notice and a text isn't legal, a friend of mine works for a lawyer and advised me. She then hit the roof and accussed me of causing trouble and fired me from the next day (this was Monday). 20 mins later she emailed me and tried to be all nice and sound like she was helping me out by saying why don't we go back to the original agreement and finish out the month. I knew why she was doing it as she has work commitments, holidays and hospital appointments for the next 3 weeks and no child care.
So the short of it is after her childish tantrum and not getting her own way she now has to pay me 5 weeks pay or it's breach of contract and I can take her to small claims court.
A word of wisdom to all nannies out there - CHECK YOUR CONTRACT AND MAKE SURE YOU ARE COVERED or you could end up having to fight it out like me.

OP posts:
StealthPolarBear · 19/03/2009 10:18

It's a difficult one - if you don't answer her calls or read her texts you won't know that they're trivial until it's too late! I can see why you're annoyed though.
What did you say to her rant - it sounds as though you were being assertive until then?

Blondeshavemorefun · 19/03/2009 10:09

she sounds lonely

and also a bit nutty!!

if you are not meeting her needs, then you need to try and sort it out IF otherwise happy in your job, if not leave

AtheneNoctua · 19/03/2009 10:00

She's crackers. How long have you worked for her? Is this new behaviour?

ButIForgetMyself · 19/03/2009 09:02

Mine phoned me ON HOLIDAY IN ITALY to ask me if I'd seen my charge's reins.

Agree with littlestars, ignore ignore ignore unless it's urgent. She'll get the message... maybe...

littlestarschildminding · 19/03/2009 07:27

Just ignore her calls and texts out of work hours unless the message she has sent is urgent....

Haribosmummy · 18/03/2009 21:23

Def. agree with Nancy75.

Get a work phone so you can be contactable without having to deal with her.

nancy75 · 18/03/2009 21:21

she sounds very needy. tbh my first reaction is to tell you to quit, but obviously with the way things are thats probably not practical. could you get a new phone, to be used just for her (dont tell her that bit) and just turn it off when not at work?

ShyTalk · 18/03/2009 21:18

Yes, but not as a nanny. However, a mad employer is a mad employer. End of. Leave asap.
And change your phone number.