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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

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Original poster

Mindee that doesn't play on her own?

268 replies

chloejessmeg · 13/01/2009 00:21

I only have 1 mindee and only for 9 hours a week, who is in full time reception. But the hours she is here, she wants me to sit and play with her the whole time, and won't sit and do anything by herself. I am not saying I want her to completly entertain herself while she is here, but I have my DD who is 1year old and soon a newborn so she needs to be able to do something. She likes to do stuff like drawing, playdough, pictures etc but won't do it unless I am sitting with her, doing the activity with her which isn't always possible. If I am dealing with my DD she just keeps asking me to do x with her, or says she needs help with stuff I know she can do on her own, and won't do anything even for 2 mins. I bought her lots of stuff in the sales to try and keep her busy, but nope, still won't do it on her own. I think she will be better if/when I get another mindee of similar age but I am only getting enquiries for babies and I don't have an under 1 space.

Has anybody else had this problem and how do you deal with it?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Bubble99 · 14/01/2009 22:43

and what has " I've worked in a lot of nurseries and they are all awful etc etc" got to do with your OP?

naturalbornmum · 14/01/2009 22:42

LM1

That is a fair point, however My oldest DC is 7 and I have looked into all forms of childcare for her and subsequent children and still come to the same conclusion. There are some rubbish nurseries out there but my child is rarley going to be with 1 person or their family. I know all the household is CRB checked but I just don't feel confident about childminders.

Original poster

chloejessmeg · 14/01/2009 22:41

I STILL can't work out what the hell I am meant to have done wrong here?

OP posts:

LesbianMummy1 · 14/01/2009 22:41

next point to nbm I am on a network so am assessed at least every 3 months often with unannounced visits ofsted also only see nurseries every 3 years and they have notice too

Original poster

chloejessmeg · 14/01/2009 22:39

FFS why is this turning into a debate against CM?

"Who knows what goes on behind closed doors? Especially with a pre verbal child."

What has this got to do with a child who doesn't like to play on her own?

OP posts:

LesbianMummy1 · 14/01/2009 22:39

naturalbornmum unless it is a comment saying whether or not a cm is right based on an internet discussion I don't see a problem on parents and/or childminders joining this topic but as a parent I would not choose or decide to scrap a whole field of childcare based on a few comments on a discussion board as my child will have individual wants and needs so would tailor my childcare choice round these needs rather than a few angry comments

naturalbornmum · 14/01/2009 22:38

Bubble - That is my point - that is why I prefer a nursery.

blueshoes · 14/01/2009 22:38

lesbianmummy, as I would expect. Just don't like the implication that good nurseries are the exception when there are as many good/bad CMs as there are good/bad nurseries. And all the bad ones deserve to be put out of business.

Original poster

chloejessmeg · 14/01/2009 22:38

Of course I am going to be defensive if somebody suggests that I am not giving good quality care. I think it would be odd not to.

But you are making assumptions too - you say I "obviously prioitise my mindees" yet I have also been told on the same thread that I am priortising my DD too much.

OP posts:

Bubble99 · 14/01/2009 22:37

Who knows what goes on behind closed doors? Especially with a pre verbal child.

naturalbornmum · 14/01/2009 22:36

Ofsted ratings are really not that relevant to childminders who they visit once every 3 years for 2 hours. {hmm] Correct me if I am wrong.

LesbianMummy1 · 14/01/2009 22:36

chloe another idea make it a game to see how long she can play on her own eg I bet you can build that tower of bricks before I change nappy shall we have a race
next time you managed to play on your own for 2 mins do you think you can win a sticker for 3 mins

naturalbornmum · 14/01/2009 22:34

It seems to me that unless you are a childminder your view on this section is not valid when infact parents are your potential customers. I have read the whole thread and find OP very defensive and other childminders jumping to her defense. Again confirms my view that a childminder is not right for my family.

Bubble99 · 14/01/2009 22:33

Original poster

chloejessmeg · 14/01/2009 22:33

Yes, the nurseries I personally have worked in were crap is what I was saying. Not all nurseries and I don't want to get into that debate.

OP posts:

popperdoodles · 14/01/2009 22:33

I used to do volunteer work at a pre school which was fantastic!! I would love to work somewhere like that in the future. As i said stop generalising and treat each setting individually.

LesbianMummy1 · 14/01/2009 22:33

blueshoes I did had 3 nurseries closed by ofsted as they were horrible and they found this to be true on their visits there are also good nurseries but you have to find them since september all childcare providers whatever setting have to work to exactly same criteria etc so they closing in on bad providers but you will never shut them all down

BoysAreLikeDogs · 14/01/2009 22:32

Original poster

chloejessmeg · 14/01/2009 22:32

So how do you not understand it?

OP posts:

Bubble99 · 14/01/2009 22:32

I just hate the 'all nurseries are bad' line that gets trotted out.

Some nurseries are bad is OK, though.

But my DCs' nursery is excellent.

naturalbornmum · 14/01/2009 22:31

I did read you whole message chloe.

Original poster

chloejessmeg · 14/01/2009 22:30

She says our park is boring! I would love to go to the park and get out of the house etc but she isn't interested in it and won't play, even when I did have a mindee of the same age as her to play with. There are other parks that she will play in, but no parking near by and wouldn't be able to walk in the short time she is here.

OP posts:

blueshoes · 14/01/2009 22:29

Natural, that would be true. Whilst I can understand a nursery worker not being able to afford childcare, on mn, todate, I have only had one CM speak well of the nursery for which she used to work. It is almost par for the course for CMs to slag off nurseries - makes you wonder why they did not make a difference to the quality of care whilst they were working there.

BoysAreLikeDogs · 14/01/2009 22:28

Oh dear

People get all heated and upset and then some numpty says 'right due to what I have I read on here I am/am not putting my child into Nursery/CM' (delete as necessary) and we all go 'fgs this is not the way to find childcare for YOUR child, by talking to random strangers on the t'internet - get out there, speak to the staff at Nursery/CM, get a feel for the way they operate, look at the whole set up'

Original poster

chloejessmeg · 14/01/2009 22:27

"On mn, it seems many people who work in 'awful' nurseries become CMs."

Probably because they feel strongly about the care of children and want to create a really good environment compared to the nursery?? I know that was a major factor for me, although as I have said, I have wanted to CM since I was in primary school.

OP posts:

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