Is it just my au pair who doesn't do her basic jobs without being asked EVERY time???

Well i know your all against au pairs /nannies that are slack but yes a large majority of them are slack and im shocked, i am a mother of 2 young kids in australia, I have been advertising for months to be a nanny in the us or uk, i would need someone to sponsor me or someone to explain how i can be there nanny without a working visa. many thing scould be worked out i guess but....... Not one person/family is willing to give me a go. Yes i have kids that i have to bring, yes im qualified in childcare and first aid and so on with experience but still not one person in the world will give me a chance. I have offered people that i would take a lower wage in return for the fact i have my kids with me. I still have to buy things i need and things for my kids. Can i ask some of you people why people will choose a single lazy person to come work for them but wont give a hardworker a go.? Im just trying to understand the logic of it. I thought we lived in a world of fair chances. I feel we dont at the moment.....

It's true the regs have now changed. Previously* student visas came in 2 types: ones with a prohibition on working and one where you had restrictions on your visa regarding the type of work and had to inform certain people you were working. Now you don't seem to be able to work but as I'm no longer working in the sector I can't comment with any authority!

What you may wish to check is the date her visa was issued and whether her old visa is still valid for work. There was a lot of humming and hawing about whether PhD students from overseas who had visas due to expire after the deadline and were working would be able to keep their jobs when the rules changed. It wasn't resolved when I left.

*This was still in force when I stopped working at an advice centre in a UK university this summer but was due to change in November.

The visa rules all changed at the end of November - currently it is a bit chaotic and nobody in the Border Agency quite knows whats going on, e.g. everybody was expecting the USA to included in the Youth Mobility Scheme (any country where there is a reciprical scheme was expected to be included) and hence I had opened up to applications from the US for next years AP, then when the guidelines were published (two days before they came into force) no USA.

Echt - those are two places (of many) I am too scared to go on MN.

Sorry, dad. Nothing personal; but it's still so true in so many places. Try the AIBU or Relationship threads on MN, just for starters!

when i did it i couldn't undetake the pt 20 hrs work W/O PRIOR APPROVAL.they did ask all about how much cash I had etc to support myself w/o working and how fees were to be paid.

it sounds like the rules have changed a bit though. high toleerance for bar restaurant work, babysitting when i was a student.

Dad, its true in most cultures.. lol...except you of course...

There have been some very recent changes to the visa regs though.

I looked into student visas earlier in the year and 20 hours a week still applied.....

I think the rules have changed - current rules

Two key paragraphs

You must also:

be able to pay for your course and support and accommodate yourself and any dependants without working or help from public funds;

You must not:

take employment in the United Kingdom;
undertake part-time (up to 20 hours), or full-time vacation employment;
undertake a work placement or internship (paid or unpaid) as part of your course of study;

When I was an MA studnet here yonks ago I was supposedly allowed to work up to 20 hours a week. I THINK was supposed to tell someone though and in principle seek approval...can't remember whom. When I asked the customs guy on entering the country at Heathrow he didn't think it would be a problem for me to work at one of the language schools teaching English, which is what I had done previously. I would imagine there is no need to panic about her au pairing on her student visa but maybe things have changed.

And does her student visa allow her to take up paid employment?

There used to be an "au pair" visa but it has been abolished. Does your Thai girl have a student visa?

nottinghill, you have had amazing aupairs. So have I. Kitty may or may not.

If you have a dud, no amount of trust or understanding will remedy the situation. Silk purses and sows' ears.

The skill is to figure out what this aupair is. But not to take too long because life is too short.

AS far as the immigration folks are concerned if you are paying over cash (no matter how little) it is work.

Temporary work visas level 5 - youth mobility scheme (yes I know I am sad but have been looking into this a lot recently as I start to recruit next years) are only being granted to citizens of Australia, New Zealand, Canada and Japan. If she is not a citizen of one of these countries or from the EEA (which is the EU plus a few other countries in Europe we like) or Switzerland she will need to have a full work visa.

Thre has been another thread on this recently (nanny not AP but in the eyes of border and immigration there is no difference) where the conclusion was that an employer who has not made adequate checks as to the eligibility of an employee to work in the UK and employees somebody not entitled to work in the UK risks a fine of up to £10,000 per employee.

Kitty
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It may help if you manage your expectations of the AP and examine how your behaviour is contributing to the situation. You sound totally unsympathetic to her illness and perhaps she is passively aggressively reacting to your treatment of her. You only trust her to look after the children for 20 mins but not longer. Crazy!. You either trust her or you don?t. I certainly would not entrust my precious DCs to someone I did not fully trust. Your DC like her, surely that is the important thing. Determine if neatly folded laundry or a contented DC/AP relationship is more important to you.

We have had a series of amazing APs. I honestly believe it is because we communicated our expectations effectively with them and treated them as part of the family. They have come on our sailing and skiing holidays and last year we were honoured guests at our first AP?s wedding.

As you have had such bad luck, perhaps you should somehow find the money to employ the services of a nanny agency. It will save you endless hours of frustration.

Good luck

Umm, Kittywise, she still needs some kind of paperwork to be here legally, given that she is not EU or on a working Visa or from one of the countries which is replacing whatever the aupair programme used to be.

My current AP doesn't just get on with things. Well that's not totally true - she misses off about 80% of daily tasks if left to own devices. It actually wound me up so much before Christmas that I sat her down and went through EVERYTHING again. I said that basically I was hapy with her, DS clearly likes her but she's there to help me and if I feel like I'm having to monitor and make sure she's doing everything it's counter-productive. So I retyped her hours sheet with each day listed and her hours broken down. In our case it's a matter of getting on with the household chores first and then being available for childcare - I can then know all her chores are done. I told her I want her chores done within those hours (she was doing them sometimes in her time off because of such poor time management). I also felt she just wanted to play with DS and to heck with the chores - I was feeling like I was the "maid" and they were having fun. So I've shifted the balance. It's only our third day since the new system but having it printed out and stuck to the fridge seems to be helping. She'll never be one for natural initiative, but she IS willing, and that's what you need to decide. Is she willing to change? Does she want to fit in? etc etc.

What visa does she have?

I am not ofay about immigration laws re: aupairs and work etc. as I can see some blurring of lines. But even the right to reside?

good point, annh.