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Original poster

could my nanny be lying to us?

54 replies

Mar826 · 05/01/2009 14:11

Hi. I am in a bizarre dilemma. We have had what looked like a wonderful nanny for the past 2 years. The reason why the situation went sour is for Christmas, we originally booked a family ski trip in Italy. Everything was booked. On the day of our trip, our nanny fell ill, apparently due to food poisoning and remained home. A few days later, I spoke with her to see if she could come on a later flight and she named another medical condition explaining why she couldn't travel so I let her have the rest of the week off.

When we returned, I asked to see her passport so we could check if she did in fact have a valid visa for travel. Mysteriously, she didn't have her passport and had sent it away to her 'solicitor' the day we returned.

When we asked for the number of her solicitor so we could ask him to faax us the relvant pages of her passport, she didn't have the address or number and then told us she sent it instead to a friend that knew where the solictor's office was.

A week later, her friend still didn't receive her passport and her soliticor was on holiday the whole week so we don't know why it was so urgent for her to send. the only number she provided of solicitor was a mobile number and no one picks up.

it all seems very dodgy and she has a good track record with us, but now we don't know whether we were right to trust her. We are giving her one more week to get her papers in order and if she doesn't come through, we'll have to fire her. A nightmare, but any thoughts on what to do?

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nannynick · 05/01/2009 14:25

What is the nannies nationality and do you have any doubts about their right to work in the UK status?
When you mentioned the trip to Italy, what reaction did you get? Were there any indications that there may be passport issues?

The passport situation as you describe it sounds odd... why does her solicitor/friend have the passport.

Assuming you are in the UK, as an employer you have a duty to check ID documentation when you take on a new employee. So I feel you are right to ask her for this documentation, as you are now having doubts.
If her passport has expired - then she could just tell you that... not a big issue - inconvenient sure. But by hiding the passport (which is what she seems to be doing to me, by saying it's with solicitor... now friend) that there could be something dodgy to do with that passport.
Obtain all the documentation you can - Birth Certificate, Passport, Visa, Driving Licence etc. Then take things from there.

Weegle · 05/01/2009 14:25

Well on the face of it, it sounds like she wanted to stay home for Christmas and didn't know how to tell you. Had she asked for that time off and you refused it? Can't imagine it would be overly nice for the nanny to be with your family working over Christmas if she could have been with friends/family.

Also - no matter if she is lying - you carrying on like this about seeing her passport - surely it's none of your business? Apart from to try and catch her out? Her passport is her private property, surely not for your inspection?! You would do better to say something along the lines "I hope you would be honest with me and say if you don't want to join us skiing, I'm sure you were ill and appreciate that wasn't nice for you, but if the same happens again and you don't fancy coming, please let me know in advance so we don't waste money on your flights/accomodation".

Original poster
Mar826 · 05/01/2009 14:24

Having a valid passport was important as we do travel alot as a family and we did tell her we would need her to travel with us from time to time. Last summer we wanted her to come to Spain with us for a week and she wasn't able to because she was in the process of applying for a UK passport, supposedly. And we said no problem. I told her we would help with any visa issues/passport issues and help pay for lawyer fees if that's necessary. What I'm not comfortable with is the fact that now I feel as if she's being deceitful and hiding something and I don't know why. We just find it odd how she seems to be spinning and spinning the story....

OP posts:
flowerybeanbag · 05/01/2009 14:14

Is a current passport a condition of her employment? Was it clear when you employed her that overseas travel would be a requirement?

Obviously lying to you is not on, but just trying to establish whether not having a passport, should that be the case, is necessarily a problem as such.