Christmas ettiquete

NK6

Thank you makes a huge difference.Sounds like she's become too used to getting the cash bonus which is not a good thing especially in the current financial climate.

Whatever I get (huge or small) I am always grateful for as I feel at the end of the day they are employers (however friendly you become) and not every job gives gifts/bonuses.

As long as I feel my family are GENUINLY happy and thankful at the end of every week that means everything to me.

I've had the same CM for three years and have given her £100 cash and a thankyou card from the kids each Christmas. I thought it was a nice present especially as I don't pay her for Bank holidays so she's missed out on cash. She doesn't seem to be offended but hasn't said thankyou either this year, only asked why I hadn't paid her for New Years day!!!!

OrangeKnickers I am in SW London - £50 sounds like a lot to me tbh... wow! I really think it's up to you as to what you give as a gift - each person places a different value on things, and you know what your CM enjoys/likes

I never expect anything from parents - some give a little something (flowers/photo album/smellies), and some don't. I actually get embarrassed when I get something

Silly, I know.

Why would you give a CM in London more ( better/bigger/etc) than a CM working elsewhere?

I think most CM wouldn't expect a thing except a card, and would be pretty uncomfortable with anything other than a small gift, wine, chocs, smellies, photoframe etc

Orange our CM looks after DS 4 days per week and I am probably going to give her £50.00 in either M&S or John Lewis vouchers, plus a small gift. We don't live in London though. If you have a good CM that you are happy with and you can afford it I think its the right thing to give her a good bonus. Just think how happy you are if you get a christmas bonus at work.

true - she has ds for four days a week and is very flexiable. She takes him when he's a bit ill and is fine when we change things at late notice (as we are a bit disorgaised still).

my DH thought that my suggested £50 was too much, so we went for £30 theatre tokens and champagne.

guess it depends on circumstances and earnings etc. our CM has just one of my 2 DSs just one day a week, so i guess i would probably want to give a bit more if she were caring for them for more days a week.

another crash - we have a great cm since June. DH thinks we should give her £100 (we live in London). Reading this thread it sounds a bit OTT. Maybe some JL vouchers would be better, for say £50? Any other london cms out there?

I think it depends, I would cherish any childminder, who looked after my dearest children. my children would like to maybe make something for her. A box of chocs or bunch of flowers is a lovely thought. I know my CM would not expect anything, but deserves something as she is great!

for my CM i just got some theatre tokens in WH Smith, and Tesco was doing a half price deal on an OK champagne so i got that too.

has anyone ever given their postman a gift?! i gave mine a fiver in his xmas card last year (he is great, and signs for things if i am out, hides parcels etc) but he never mentioned it so i am not sure if he thought it was too measly to thank me for, or if he thought it unnecessary and i shouldn't do it again?!?!

I also think it is different. CM work for themselves, nannies are employed by the parents.

I don't think anyone should feel they are meant to do anything. A present should be a nice surprise, not an expected thing.

After only 2 months I wouldn't spend very much tbh.

Oh I don't feel pressured at all - I can easily afford £10 or thereabouts and tbh she does deserve more

I might get dd to pick out some toiletries, thanks

I agree that its the sentiment and not the amount of money, i have had lovely bunches of flowers wrapped in christmas ribbon, boxes of chocs, candles, pen, mug etc and they have all been very appreciated.

tigerfeet, please don't feel pressured into doing something that you cannot afford to! i doubt your CM expects anything but a bottle of bubbles or smelly stuff never goes amiss in my book! Don't overdo it.... she will really appreciate the sentiment anyway!

With pleasure JenniPenni - I'll send them over shall I?!

My lovely CM is worth her weight in gold though!

Can I crash this thread to ask what sort of gifts are usually appreciated? DD started with our lovely CM in September and both dd and I would like to give her a present, but I'm struggling with what to buy. Can't stretch to £30 M&S Vouchers, much as I'd like to.

Any ideas? Wine? Choccy? Smellies?

Bramshott, may I mind your kids please??

Last year I got my CM £30 M & S vouchers. It seemed to go down well, so I am tempted to do the same this year, or is that too boring?!

'I am a childminder and although i would never expect a gift it is very special and very appreciated to get a small gift.'

Ditto! I give my mindees gifts for Christmas, it's great fun opening them with them and their folks I also give a Christmas card from my family to theirs.

I certainly do not expect anything from the parents, but some do give a lil something, some don't. Their is no right or wrong way.

I am a childminder and although i would never expect a gift it is very special and very appreciated to get a small gift, last year the parents of the 3 siblings i look after gave me a lovely basket of fruit and nuts and we loved it.

But, of course, no one should expect anything at all.

mindful... as a nanny I too do the cards/gifts/cake for birthdays etc for the parents and even grandparents too

I dont drink so the champers wouldn't work for me, but, i'd love the theatre tokens. Very thoughtful especially as you know she loves theatre. That's an excelent idea.

you are obviously considerate to have made the OP!

my CM has looked after DS1 and then DS2 one day a week for the last 3 years. she has ALWAYS given them a small birthday present, and christmas present, and makes me something with them for easter and mother's day!!! is that normal????!!! it is so lovely.

so, each christmas we give her a bottle of champagne and theatre tokens as she is mad on going to plays. does that seem appropriate/sufficient, do you think?!

Some parents have paid me for the week between Christmas and NY as a bonus, though I don't expect it and try to refuse but they are very pushy!!!