Am I paying au pair enough? Heeelp

marmadukescarlet - that's so helpful to know what someone else actually does! thanks.

i thought it was about right and not low, but you can never be sure. the mobile phone thing is a great idea, and thanks for the tax info.

I completely apologise, my computer was showing all your posts without a single space I can see them now!

Paragraphs people please! Oh my eyes

£60 is not a low pocket money, as previously suggested, for 25 hours - it is fairly average.

From Au Pair World site

au pair (25 working hours per week): 55 GBP + board and lodge
au pair plus (40 working hours per week) 60 - 75 GBP
mother's help 75 - 120 GBP

I have AP+ and pay between £75-90 per week and give 'extras' inc mobile phone, with regular top ups, young persons railcard, money towards course fee etc BUT ONLY for the right candidate or attitude.

Tax is payable over £91-95 iirc.

fwiw even the paid for courses here are much less, under 200 for 6 hrs per week over 10 weeks. Free courses are only available to some - it depends on when they arrived, where they are from and their level of English in our area.

i am doing some research at the moment because we are thinking of hiring an au pair. i've found "pocket money" stated as around £60 per week for 25 hours, with 2 days off a week and 2 weeks a year off. is this right or on the low side? and also do you have to pay tax on au pair "pocket money" or is cash ok?

sorry bit of a hijack there

Everyhitng i've seen suggests £60 'pocket money' for 25 hrs a week is normal.

And although you wouldn't expect them to do sole charge all day long or for a child under 2 the odd half hour of babysitting isn't that much hard work!

Celtic,
At least you don't have all your eggs in one basket. I mean if the au pair up and leaves, youstill have a cleaner, and vice versa. You might even find that bit of competition between them is a good thing. For example, the cleaner might iron the shirts in half the time it takes AP, and then she won't be able to complain so much.

Personally, I would stick to the contractual agreement, largely as a matter of principal to remind her who works for whom.

I have just read this thread and I have just had a similar conversation.

Our Au pair has been with us for a while now and started off on £60 a week for 25hour, I now pay her £90 a week for 35 hour week, but it was agreed that she kept on top of the family ironing as and when she choose to do it, to fit in with her studies. She sometimes has sole charge of 2 children and this bit she really loves.

However the other day she told me she felt she didn't seem to have time to herself, and found it difficult doing the ironing and was tired in the mornings. She also told me her other friends did not do the family Ironing and only did the childrens, and got paid extra for babysitting. on Saturdays. I ask her if she had any suggestions and she said no. I had noticed that Ironing was not getting done lately and a few other jobs and the playroom looking rather messy.

I came away thinking perhaps i was not paying her enough or expecting too much of her. Increasing her pay was not an option for us.

After thinking about what she said her I asked her if things were better when she worked 25 hour week and she said yes. I thought it strange because she always looking to increase her income not to reduce it to £60 a week. She didn't seem pleased when i said this. Then i realized she wanted to reduce her duties in particular the ironing and still get paid £90 a week.

I was really dispointed in her and very annoyed when i thought back to all the other extra cash bonus for her holidays, and extra paid leave.

Now we have agreed to reduce her hours, however she has since told me she misunderstood, and thought i wanted the Ironing up to date on a daily basis and wants to continue as usual ( i know i have never implied this I have actually written down for her to choose when she does the ironing)

But now i am i the process of arranging for a cleaner to start after easter and its now caused a bit of tension.

It's great that you have cleared the air with your au pair and that all is well.

And there's nothing to say you can't increase her pocket money at some point if you continue to like her and her work.

Exactly KatieMac.

Agree KatieMac. I remember times when people should have said that to me. They never did though, with mixed results. The word loose and cannon come to mind!

GG, when I started as an AA in the civil service I got low wages. I was qualified for the higher paid AO job, but had to do AA duties. I wanted the extra money....could do the extra work....but it was pointed out to me that I had accepted the lower paid, lower expectation job. If I wanted the higher paid job I would have to wait until one was advertised and apply for it...I might get it or I might not, but could I please concentrate on the job I applied for and got.

I think that what they said was fair. You might want to point that out to your AP. She was happy with your job when she got it & the T&C were set out in the interview. NOTHING has changed.

Thanks Ameriscot.

Uwila,

Brooklands College seem to provide the language classes for Spelthorne. There is an Outreach centre in The Avenue, Sunbury - you could check to see if there are classes there. If not, there are certainly a wide range at the Oast House in Staines (aka Au Pair City). There are also free language classes at Spelthorne College in Ashford.

Sorry, Ameriscot. Posts crossed.

Gorgeousgirl, I always would be a tad bit irritated that after only just signing the contract and taking her into my home she is hinting at a renegotiation. Does your contract say when the pay/hours/duties will be re-evaluated. If not, I would think a 6 or even 12 month review is appropriate (probably six would be fair). I also would have an informal review of her performance at 3 months and use that as a basis for renegotiation at the 6 month review.

It has been my experience with domestic employees that they sometimes think the "extra credit" is more important than the defined duties. In other words, she could think that because works all of these extra hours (of her own choosing) that she has proven herself worthy of more money even if she doesn't fulfill all of her contractual obligations. And that isn't to say that she isn't fulfilling her obligations, it's just been my experience so perhaps something for you to look out for.

And, Ameriscot is so right. You have accepted this person into your home to work for you, not so you can make her happy. There is of course a balance to be found there. But, remember that she works for you, and you are not her mother.

GOregeousgirl, for what it's worth, I think you are paying a fair salary. And, I also think that small bits of sole charge are okay if you are comfortable with it. The accommodation you describe sounds very nice. I am in a similar situation. I have a nanny, but I know that if shelooked around she could probably find an offer for more money. But, at the end of the month I have to pay her what I can afford. This means that I have to be prepared for her to one day leave us. I simply can not afford to pay her more money, and I can not give her what I do not have.

I think you have made the right choice. And I also do not think her pay/hours are unreasonable, especially if her English skills are less than perfect.

Also, I too am curious about free English classes for EU citizens. My nanny is Estonian. I am able to communicate with her okay. But, her grammar could use improvement. For example, my DD says "What it is?" instead of "What is it?". I think it's time to learn proper sentence structure.

Check out your local Adult Education department or sixth form colleges for free language classes.

It does sound like she is trying to manipulate you a bit. Is this the girl that has relatives nearby? IIRC, she was very keen for you to take her on, not the other way around.

I feel that the family has to be the ones calling the shots. You have her in your home to help you - it is not your duty to be putting up foreigners just for the fun of it. She has to work at times to suit you, but you also have to be aware of the consequences specific times mean to her. She should have informed you about the extra cost of doing lessons at different times - I imagine it's not that big a deal to you whether she works predominantly in the morning or afternoon.

She's a big girl, and it's not your problem that she has selected an option that has cost her more money.

I think your instinct about letting her go if she can find a better deal is the right one. It should stop any bad feelings and put the ball in her court. It's fine for her to ask for more money, but she has to respect why she might not get that raise. It's the same with any job.

don't know if this helps but I've had nannies for the last 10 years so been through a few of the associated emotional ups and downs. the most important thing is to make sure that you are being fair - and it sounds as though you are. there is no obligation for you to pay the most or provide the best job - you need to pay what you agreed with your nanny and stick to the agreed job description. As you have already said - she can and will find a better job if yours is not what she wants, but until that point it is reasonable to assume that both of you are happy to continue with the existing arrangement. In my experience things can go wrong if either of you starts putting emotional pressure on the other eg you feel you have to pay more because she has a friend earning more or she feels taken for granted. it doesn't sound as if you are anywhere near that at present.

I pay my current nanny £240 per week - she has no qualifications but is doing an NVQ at college now. However, she has sole charge and does a number of housekeeping duties whilst the children are at school (and full time sole charge in school holidays) and 2 nights babysitting a week. this seems a significantly bigger job than yours and could be the reason why her friend gets more money as well.

Finally, it's always interested me that whenever a nanny has told me they are underpaid compared to a friend and I've checked with the friend's employer (you get to know them over time) then the other employer is usually being given the same line too - nannies have the perfectly natural habit of focusing on the area in which their postion compares unfavourably (money, hours, duties, perks) and ignoring the ones where they are better off.

Gorgeousgirl - in that case I suspect that the friend is being paid as a nanny not as an au pair. You need your ap to know why she is an ap and not a nanny. So for example - she doesn't have sole charge, she doesn't do full days, she does not have the required experience etc etc. Get her to see this as a training opportunity and give examples of other jobs where while training the pay is lower than when fully experienced. Then tell her that once she has ap'd for a couple of families then she too can sell herself as an unqualified nanny rather than an ap!

£60 a week is acceptable - it's on the low the side of normal. It's appropriate for an au pair whose English is not good and who does not drive.

£5 and hour is a lot for extra time. I think that you should review her overall hours so that you are paying less than £90 for 31 hours.

Don't be taken in by the cost of the language classes. The au pair is here to learn English and presumably the classes are worth the investment for her. If she is from within the EU, there should be free language classes in your area.

My relationship with my last au pair went pear-shaped after she started finding out about what other au pairs earned.