Au Pair Experts-Over here please......

OMG Squiffy! Your experience is confluent with mine - our last Turkish AP came to us with driving licence. Driving Instructor took her for 2 lessons, then suggested I took her on practise school run (she drove TO the school, so no kids on board). There was no way I was going to let her drive the kids!!! 2 weeks of driving lessons & sharing lifts with neighbours later, she finally admitted to my Turkish-speaking friend that she couldn't drive.

Sorry for thread hijack. Good luck Whoosh.

We have a fabulous German Au Pair who is a real advocate for Au Pairing.She tells us that she is very happy with us. I made an effort to ask the agency to supply me with the phone numbers of other families in our town with au pairs. From this list i set up a meeting with another German aupair, I went with her to meet the girl. Luckily they hit it off and are enjoying going out and about together. They are of a similar age too 18 and 19 which helps. My au pair did not wish to go to a language school as her English is superb so this was another way for her to socialise.

There's no way I would let her stay in the house, but if you do, make sure you've got photocopies of her passport and that kind of thing, and that she knows about it.

OOops, sorry, didn't read the last post saying you'd already told her she can't stay. Must pay more attention when posting!

If you are worried about leaving in your house whilst you are away, can you pay her rent so that she can stay in her current accommodation? It's money, but you may feel your peace of mind is worth it. I was an au pair myself once, in France, and wouldn't have expected to have been left alone in the house for so long to start with.

All the best with the decision!

I tend to get my AP's from Scandinavia. They are generally horrified at how poorly we drive here in the UK . And the BSM chaps always give them a big thumbs up when they assess them.

Now the Turkish girl we had...... well, let's just say that I didn't expect to have a full blown argument at a T junction onto a dual carriageway about whether or not one should stop and give way....

i feel for you Whooosh. Fwiw we are on our 3rd French au pair (Au Pairs by Pebbles) and driving is a must for us. All have been absolutely fine and we only arranged a formal lesson for the first one. All went out several times with DH and no driving with children until he declared them safe. My rules are that they must have held a driving licence for at least a year - partly due to the experience I feel they need to have and also partly due to a MN thread that talked about the insurance cost rocketing if they have driven for a lesser time.

Aupairworld and greataupair websites always seem to have loads of young German women who want to be au pairs in UK. Have recruited our last 2 APs this way. Both have been excellent drivers and really nice. You can talk to them on the phone. Try it?

I second listening to the gut instinct box. I wish I'd listened to my (and my dd's) gut instinct on our first ap. Oh, to turn back the clock!

Whoosh - sounds like there is one box she doesn't tick, the gut instinct one. I have interviewed a few who seemed OK, answered all the questions well and seemed experienced but I just didn't feel comfortable so I said no. Couldn't up with a reason for rejecting them that I could explain but something didn't feel right. If you are not 100% comfortable should you be taking her on (and reading the earlier posts were you 100% happy before the driving issue came up).

I always take mine out for a little test drive, to date they have all hit the kerb (hard) at the same point on a tight bend near here (two tyres and one wheel down to date). If I am not happy they then go out with my FIL who is a driving instructor, they are then not allowed out witht he kids until he is happy with them, but then I guess not everybody has a FIL with a dual controlled car.

Hi Whooosh

I'm in Broxbourne - whereabouts are you?

If you're interested, my current AP came through Childcare International (am I allowed to name agencies on here?) who seem to specialise in German APs. They sent us lots of excellent cvs and were thorough. They've placed quite a few APs in Herts according to my AP.

(PS agree with Simply and Ingles2)

I agree with Simply, Whoosh...(unfortunately) it's her problem she can't afford the rent and I wouldn't be leaving a girl I'd just met in the house alone whilst I went on holiday. Probably best to leave this one I think. Sorry (again)

whooosh Sorry, I've sped read the most recent posts on the thread and I've forgotten I'm sure the most part of it though I've read it from the beginning. Fwiw, I think that her not being able to afford her rental place is her problem, not yours. If she doesn't pass the assesment then she's going to have to afford it or find another family sharpish. She doesn't sound an ideal candidate for you and if you make lots of allowances at the beginning, you may find that it just carries on that way. I would not be happy leaving someone I hardly knew living in my house whist I was away on holiday. I've been to Romania and even the professional minibus and coach drivers that drove us (on a no-expense spared type trip) had a very poor standard of driving. In fact, dh recently suggested going back on holiday with the kids as the hotel was fab and very reasonably priced but it was about 2 hours drive from the airport and I feel I've used up a couple of my 9 lives (ok, so I'm not a cat but you know what I mean!) already and I wouldn't risk having the kids with us. Good luck with whatever you decide.

Hi Whooosh

I wasn't going to post my experience of my Romanian AP's driving but as others have thought I'd add my view.
This was actually one of the reasons that we let ours go as we paid for her to have some driving lessons and then DH took her out. His feeling was that she wasn't safe to drive the car on her own even after loads of practice let alone with the children in it. To cut a long story short we never let her drive when she was with us but she didn't think that she had any problems and thought that we were too fussy! I gave her a copy of the Highway Code but she refused to read it saying that the roads in the UK (just north of M25) were the same as in Romania .

We've now got a German AP who's brilliant.

Thanks Issy - what a good idea, I hadn't thought about sport but she is quite sporty and I seem to remember volleyball mentioned on her cv I think.

Issy, are yours slightly older than the average? I have a Hungarian AP aged 27 who has just started and I want to try to help her make friends.
We're in the north and I seem to remember you are in London but I wonder if your APs have any advice for mine about how to meet other Hungarians in the UK?

ooooooohhhhhhhhhh Issy you lucky thing. I had one form Germnay like that. I should have locked her in the cellar and never let her go home!

ha ha....................now have a nanny who is 4 x the cost and not half as good.

Yes good luck whoosh. We are all here to support x