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Paid childcare

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nanny wages cash in hand

131 replies

janett · 06/07/2008 01:32

why oh why do some employers feel the need to offer x amount pay and then when it comes to signing contracts they want to pay at least a 1/3 cash in hand? dont they realise nannys might one day want a mortgage ect..

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AtheneNoctua · 25/07/2008 10:32

mummy poppins, really, what ARE you thinking? You obvious don't like this girl. Why in God's name do you allow her to do these things?

I don't mean to be rude. You deserve so much better than this nanny provides. But I do wonder why you have not chucked her out on the basis of incompetance. Why i sokay for this numbskull to walk all over you like this?

mummypoppins · 25/07/2008 09:29

yes yes please tell us..........I hijacked the thread if you look at the original title!

imananny · 25/07/2008 09:22

nothing wrong with a bit of hi jacking harriet

and least mbs can be aware of what crap nannies do, and then be grateful that they have a nice one

waits and polishes halo

1dilemma · 24/07/2008 23:01

Go on Harriet tell me the stuff you put up with so I know what to avoid/crack down on sharpish

HarrietTheSpy · 24/07/2008 22:18

I heard that like a broken record, MP. He was never late to work when he had to do the mroning shift when I was on my business trips [hmmm], as if this was happening every week rather than half a dozen times a year.

I should't complain because he does loads - this is also why I didn't feel entitled to push it, even though I was really unhappy. (He is currently on for the Golden Nappy award and always brings me a drink in the night when I'm feeding. Bless...but anyway...)

I was about to start posting about all the things we put up with, just becuase the woman was on time. But that would be a major hijack, everyone would fall asleep, and well...at this point everyone's heard enough about it one way or another.

imananny · 24/07/2008 22:00

you say you wouldnt be sad, if your nanny goes - that should in itself say something to you!!

have said it before borrowing without asking is stealing

what on earth does she spend her money on, does she have some weird sex/kinky/drug habbit which she spends all her cash on?

mummypoppins · 24/07/2008 20:08

blimey the spy thats what my DH says. She always turns up and is always punctual. Only 2 days off sick in 18 months.....it could be worse.

I really dont know what to do but I expect the petrol situation will dictate. She should not have used the card when she was on holiday but DH suspects she was doing it to improve her cashflow ( which is still stealing ) ie she used us to pay for diesel then and will pay for our usuage now when she is about to be paid.

All up she is on a bloody good number. I feel very sorry for her because she will never survive in the real world . If she was a liveout nanny she would not be able to budget at all and that would be a disaster!

I wouldnt be sad to see her go as she annoys me but starting again is always a trauma!

RachieB · 24/07/2008 20:07

OMFG i cannot believe some of what i am reading!

taking the pee or what!!!

HarrietTheSpy · 24/07/2008 19:35

This whoel situation would drive me stark raving mad.

However, I really sympathise with you as we stuck a bad situation with a nanny for longer than we should have. These things have a way of continuing on , and before you know it it's like six months later and you're still thinking oooh what to do, what to do.

I would also look at getting rid. This is what we were afraid of too, that we would end up with someone even worse, as one poster suggested was poss. The woman's plus points - always on time, etc - were big ones in DH's eyes. In reality, while no situation is PERFECT, we've never regretted parting with that particular nanny and I predict you will feel the same.

imananny · 24/07/2008 19:26

but if she was on holiday,then she should of used her own money and not yours - thats what i meant

she doed seem rather crap with money - maybe she needs to come into the real world of a lifetime in bebt - ie a mortgage and bills/council tax etc

what on earth does she spend her wages on - its not even if she really needs to pay much for weekend food, and no car exspenses such as mot/tax/insurance etc

mummypoppins · 24/07/2008 19:03

imananny its a petrol card which we provide for her to fill up the car for business only. It was done to stop giving her cash as she would just spend it all and then we would have to give her more for fuel!

So the use was only unauthorised to the extent that she was on holiday. Therefore if she doesnt use it again for a number of weeks thats fine but if she has continued to use it then there will be trouble. I won't know until I get the next statement on Monday.

To be honest its disgraceful I should have to keep such a tight rein on what she does with money. She is 39 FGS.

imananny · 24/07/2008 18:41

she filled her car with YOUR credit card

I would never dream of filling my car up/doing my shopping etc on works credit card!!

again this is stealing - you should not pay for her petrol, and if it was her holiday, then she should of have paid!!!

mummypoppins · 24/07/2008 10:59

well..........she filled the car up on our petrol account on the first day of her holiday as she was going to the Lake District. It is quite clear in her contract that we do not pay for private diesel so I am just waiting to see when we get the next statement in 2 weeks when she fills it again and then we will sit down with her.

I always find this time of the year difficult.....working in a hot stuffy office to pay someone good money and massive expenses to have a nice time with my children out and about and lazing by the pool in my garden so I do have to be careful not to let my grumpy attitude colour my judgement !!

Know what I mean ???!!!

BUT I am thinking that maybe a mother's help would be more what I need and it might save me a little bit as well.

Come to think of it anyone else employ a MH on around £200 a week net ??

AtheneNoctua · 24/07/2008 10:14

Does anyone else wonder if Mummypoppins nanny IS Squiffy's old nanny?

squiffy · 24/07/2008 09:47

mummyp I am absolutely convinced you have the clone of my old nanny - she was an older woman, no home, broken relationships back in her home country, no real future. I felt quite sorry for her and used that as an excuse to put up with loads of rubbish (culminating in a number of things that I had to spell out via the lawyers, so I won't go into here). You really really should get rid and replace - the change it will make to the whole atmosphere in the house will be worth it. Nannybliss is such a nice place to be and I am mad as a box of frogs that I put up with a miserable relationship for so long beforehand.

imananny · 24/07/2008 08:38

so at pool,esp today - it is so hot here in the south!!!

guess the main thing your children DO love their nanny,and that makes a world of difference if you are a working mum

you could change her and find a dreadful one

i do think you need to make sure she understands her role as a nanny/hk eso when kids at school, and a budget of £30 weekly is plenty

i have said before, that I take my charges out to legoland/swimming etc, but i normally get a bogof offer, so oldest gets in free, and middle and youngest you dont have to pay for (yet)

navyeyelasH · 24/07/2008 00:46

I'm not surprised your children love her TBH, I think my mindees would love me a bit more if I let them spend £15 on sweets at the cinema! We have a strict sweets once a week policy (unless a treat for something outstanding) and even then they have their sweets after tea and never ever more than £1 worth - normally 50p each! Am I too mean? They don't seem to mind though!?

She sounds to me like she is taking the mick - can you not talk to her? £30 for a weekly budget (I get £30 in summer hols - some weeks spend nothing) blown in in one day is just plain bone idle.

I took my mindees to Longleat a while ago, paid for myself (have been desperate to go so seemed stupid for my boss to pay) and we paid half of the petrol costs. I am starting to get the impression that some nannies (usually the awful ones!) get paid much more than me and have a much "easier" time. Make me so !

1dilemma · 23/07/2008 23:49

Just backtracking yes Athene that was the site, I don't spend a lot of time on there but I can remember people commenting about it.
Mummypoppins you were that person I remember thinking at the time you sound like such a lovely employer (and it sounds like a cushy job!!) that I almost suggested to dh that I leave him here and I come up and work for you!

£15 on cinema snacks is crazy IMHO, I ssupect she stuffs your dcs with sweets because it keeps them quiet when out and about.

Pimms round the pool does sound lovely

I have pretty much resigned myself to after-school help only now, we just really need something even just for a couple of days a week just to make it all manageable and take some pressure off at work

missiesparkles · 23/07/2008 21:18

if she is so healthy living it seems ridiculous she is happy to let your children have sweets - and how difficult is it to give children fruit/veg? and i'm not really a fan of sugar rushing children, the crash is so terrible for them I've found. its hard enough at the end of a busy day without having to eat dinner while crashing from being stuffed with sweets

when we go out, our current favourite snacks are carrot sticks and sugar snaps with (sometimes!) a side of homemade hummous - delish! or we have a mini fruit bowl each, or share an apple - the most exciting thing my charge has is those organix snack type things, but theres so many different fruits etc she likes I don't really bring them with us!
but my point is, these things are easy to bring or even buy ifyswim?

god I sound like a militant old tree hugger LOL

I think the fact she is sensible is a plus point but then children will develop a liking for someone who lets them have sweets all the time [hmmm] def agree with bad value for money - I'm sure there are many safe, adorable and HONEST nannies who would not spend all your money+ not bat an eyelid loading a dishwasher

but I can imagine how daunting the thought of re-interviewing and unsettling your home would be - I wish you all the best+really hope it works out for you xx

ps - may def have to take you up on the pool offer, sounds lurvely!!
not sure when I'd manage it, but hey, a girl can dream eh?

mummypoppins · 23/07/2008 21:00

well of course this week she owes the kitty £40 so thats where it came from but next monday she will get £30 quid and that is it.

I dont think it is unreasonable at all. I wouldnt spend 15 quid on snacks if I took them. Its not about the money but rather discipline. They would be allowed a drink and a few sweets but not £4 of popcorn as well.

The funny thing is she is a very hippy alternative person who eats all organic and makes her own skincare yet stuffs my children full of sweets. I thnk its because she is lazy and cant be bothered.

I dont mind paying a good wage.....hell as a lawyer I earn one but I do hate bad value for money which is what I feel i get.

Funny. life eh. Yet above all she is a very safe sensible person with them and they adore her.

As a parent its a tough call. Nice to feel however form all you lovely people on mumsnet that my grumpy uncharitable thoughts about her arent that way out.

Thanks.......and by the way all mumsnet nannies and nanny employers passing .the pool is blue sparkling 82 degrees and open for visits.

xx

missiesparkles · 23/07/2008 20:49

thats an extra £120 a month ON TOP of her already (IMO) cushty wage

GET RID!!

If I didn't love my job so much I'd be making a beeline for you MP

imananny · 23/07/2008 20:47

she should either pay the extra or take it from next week, and give her £23 - mean nanny here

park or swim in their own pool tom and thur

missiesparkles · 23/07/2008 20:46

£15 on snacks!! - although I'm one of these hippy nannies that makes a packed lunch/brings snacks from home for everything though lol.
unless we were specifically going out for a meal that is!

I very occasionally run personal errands in town whilst my charge is with me - but I wouldn't buy a new wardrobe! and I pretty much only do it when she's having a quick snooze in her buggy so 15/20 mins shop time max

and only when I've cleared it with my MB as I sometimes pick up things she needs too etc

nannynick · 23/07/2008 20:45

Oh you did set a budget - yet she still spent over the budget! Did the extra come from her own pocket? What about the rest of the week, I guess they will be visiting the local park.

imananny · 23/07/2008 20:44

£15 even

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