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If I have a live in nanny, should she have a lock on her door and do you go in there at all?

53 replies

beachyhead · 31/01/2005 12:46

We are thinking about getting a live in nanny this summer and we've got a couple of options for where she could sleep. Either a small room upstairs, and then get the use of the playroom, shower room and small kitcheny area (the utility room) in the evenings or we could just give up the play room and she could have that as her bedroom/studio etc. It would mean we would lose the playroom, but it is much more segregated so we would be less bumping into each other in bedroom corridors.......

Do live in nannies expect to have a lock on their bedroom door - only asked as we haven't any locks on our internal doors? and do you go in there at all, or does the cleaner?

Too many questions!!!!Oh and I am talking about a nanny, rather than an au pair, as we are expecting a baby in August and I will be going back to work afterwards....

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Ameriscot2005 · 31/01/2005 13:31

I do go into our au pair's room because we have some of our stuff stored in there - for example, all the spare towels and sheets, and some board games. The room has way more storage than the au pair needs for her own things, and this is a convenient place for us to store our things. As Uwila says, it's our house.

I wouldn't encourage locks on doors because I think this could be a safety hazard in the event of a fire.

Our daughters love going into the au pair's room, and the au pair seems happy enough with this (she's not quite sick of Barbie DVDs yet). We've told the girls that they are not allowed in her room in the evening though when the AP is off-duty.

Uwila · 31/01/2005 13:23

I wouldn't put a lock on her door even if she asked for it. No way no how. I would take it as a sign that she either was not to be trusted or she didn't trust. Either way, it would be a biad sign.

To be honest,I think you should the one that YOU prefer to give up. I would have to think long and hard about putting a nanny's comfort before my children'splayroom. Is that fair to the children. I try to accommodate my nanny (too have a baby due in a few months so I am in a similar position and do employ a nanny), but not at the expense of my children. If you believe the children benefit from the playroom, then that is important. Do you want to take that away from them.

If you give your nanny her own room, remeber that she does not own the room. It is still a room in YOUR house.

binkie · 31/01/2005 13:04

Are you using an agency? I'd ask them which of your accom options are preferable - simply because some people will decide whether to apply for the job on that alone. If giving her the playroom means the shower room is effectively hers alone mornings & evenings, then that would carry a lot of weight. Also, a big bugbear of live-in nannies is the children barging into her room when she's off duty, so segregation is preferable. And you might want to think about whether you want to overhear her music, late-night phone conversations, etc.!

Locks: so long as she's protected from after-hours barging (see above) no, I don't think she should expect that. Part of being a good live-in nanny is being good at domestic give-and-take, and I'd be doubtful of someone who insisted on being able to bar the door; though on the other side, of course, I'd never go in without invitation. And on cleaner, I'd give the nanny the choice.