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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

Part time nanny - part time nursery?

69 replies

PancakeCloud · 22/10/2026 15:43

I have an almost 1 year old who is due to start nursery 5 days a week soon. They’ll be doing long days 8am-6pm, and work commitments mean I can’t do fewer hours. The nursery seems lovely as nurseries go but I’m really concerned they’re too young to be in this kind of institutional environment and am having massive mum guilt.

I’ve crunched the numbers and I can’t afford a full time nanny. I could afford a nanny two days a week and my DC would do three days a week in nursery. Eg. Mon/Wed/Fri nursery and Tues/Thurs with nanny.
Would this be beneficial at all or would it be harder on my DC to have to get used to both a new nursery and a new nanny at the same time.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
fiorentina · 23/10/2026 20:30

We had a balance of both. It added flexibility and DC were fine with it. Nanny would do things like take them to classes, swimming lessons, hanging out with nanny friends and their children and do cooking etc with them. Nursery gave them different experiences.
Nanny had the advantage that she would look after them on days when they wouldn’t be well enough for nursery for example.

dowhatyouwantthen · 23/10/2026 20:29

I probably wouldn’t go for a childminder for a baby to be honest.

Childminders have multiple children of different ages and tend to try to get them all on the same routine with sleep. Nap conditions have recently been made much stricter so this has compounded this problem. It’s nice to think it’s a cuddly home from home environment but it isn’t really, it’s just a different type of institution.

monymonymony · 23/10/2026 20:25

Mumofoneandone · 23/10/2026 19:48

I know a lot of people spout the line of teachers can tell which children have or haven't been in childcare.
Please ignore.
There is little benefit for a child being in childcare until over 3. They need to be with their primary carer, wherever possible, until that age.
So much evidence around about the damage being done to children through long hours in noisy nurseries. It's just not popular to comment on it.
Short periods away from parents is fine but the hours proposed by OP are too long.

There is simply no evidence to suggest any damage to children from 'noisy nurseries'.

Mumofoneandone · 23/10/2026 19:48

monymonymony · 22/10/2026 19:15

Worked for 7s

Nurseries replicate the environment modern society has taken away from our children: a chance to socialise with lots of peers, as they would have if we still lived in close-knit communities where women cared for each other’s babies and toddlers grew up alongside one another.

We’ve learned from looking at isolated tribal societies that a baby is held by eight different people throughout the day and breastfed by at least two women besides their mother. A mother holds her own baby for only 40% of the day. We’re simply not made to raise our children the way we do now, and the lack of contact with peers and other adults has a negative impact on children reaching Reception age.

Any teacher will tell you how much more a child who hasn’t attended nursery can struggle compared with one who has attended from an early age. Since you have the opportunity to choose full-time nursery, go for it without regrets. A nanny wouldn’t offer those same social benefits.

I know a lot of people spout the line of teachers can tell which children have or haven't been in childcare.
Please ignore.
There is little benefit for a child being in childcare until over 3. They need to be with their primary carer, wherever possible, until that age.
So much evidence around about the damage being done to children through long hours in noisy nurseries. It's just not popular to comment on it.
Short periods away from parents is fine but the hours proposed by OP are too long.

AleaEim · 23/10/2026 19:12

PancakeCloud · 22/10/2026 19:49

Thank you, this could be a good solution, hadn’t considered a daily nanny for afternoons only but this would potentially work really well.

Most year round nurseries operate 8-6 and expect you to send dc at least two days so this afternoon nanny set up wouldn’t suit I’d imagine. Term time nurseries tend to operate 9-3 or mornings only which I don’t think you are looking for.

AleaEim · 23/10/2026 19:04

@PancakeCloud i sent my dd to both nursery and childminder from jan this year, 2 days full days nursery and 3 full days with childminder, she was 13 months. My dd who was at the time v sociable and resilient settled into both very well and never cried with either setting so I don’t think having two providers is a problem imo. However, I was never fully happy with the nursery despite it being outstanding rated, it lacked personal touch, they didn’t notice certain things about her development that the childminder did and they were a bit showy in that they had lots of incredible resources but really lacked other things I valued like consistency, attachment, personable nature. She was constantly sick as well and I know most of the illnesses were form nursery as the manager would let us know in the group chat when something was going around. The childminders mindees were rarely ill.

Anyway, fast forward to now and I’ve decided to take my dd out of the nursery and just keep her with the childminder. She was extremely distressed when they moved her to the toddler room this autumn and started to catch every illness again so I just thought what the hell am I doing. She will likely go back there for preschool part time if I can’t find anywhere better but it will just be to get her ready for school and I’d only send her 2-3 days at most.

monymonymony · 23/10/2026 17:51

CremeEggsForBreakfast · 23/10/2026 12:59

Pretty hard to Google when you're given something as vague as "tribal communities" and you don't answer the question of who did the study.

What about indigenous Peruvian people who carry their own infants near-constantly until the age of 1 and the studies in Western cultures that were inspired by this that show babywearing improves maternal bonding?

I'm not at all saying one culture is better than the other. I'm just saying that there are many people groups who do things in very different ways and you can use that as justification for almost any practice you like!

Try using the phrases "hunter-gatherer communities" and "raise children cooperatively" in your search. I don't tend to write down the sources of my random reading to use in arguments with random strangers on the internet.
If this is genuinely of interest to you, the information is easily discovered. If you simply want to engage in an argument for the sake of defending an ingrained belief, I'm probably not the best person to assist you with that.

CremeEggsForBreakfast · 23/10/2026 12:59

monymonymony · 23/10/2026 07:44

To your questions, yes and yes. They stay in one hut and around it. Perhaps you should google this topic if of interest.

Pretty hard to Google when you're given something as vague as "tribal communities" and you don't answer the question of who did the study.

What about indigenous Peruvian people who carry their own infants near-constantly until the age of 1 and the studies in Western cultures that were inspired by this that show babywearing improves maternal bonding?

I'm not at all saying one culture is better than the other. I'm just saying that there are many people groups who do things in very different ways and you can use that as justification for almost any practice you like!

everycowandagain · 23/10/2026 11:47

PancakeCloud · 23/10/2026 11:40

Thank you. What split did you find most effective?

Great question and the answer is that it changed over time. My top tip on childcare is to make the arrangements that work for you now and be aware that you may need to adjust it as life changes.

We originally had 3 days of nursery and added 1 day of nanny when I increased to full time then added a 2nd day of nanny when my husband returned to full time.

PancakeCloud · 23/10/2026 11:40

everycowandagain · 23/10/2026 10:53

We did a nursery/nanny split when the kids were younger, it was great. They had full busy days at nursery then days where they didn't have to be up and out early because the nanny came. They enjoyed both and were very settled.

It also meant we could use nursery for extra days if our nanny was on holiday and our nanny could help if they couldn't go to nursery...

Thank you. What split did you find most effective?

OP posts:
everycowandagain · 23/10/2026 10:53

We did a nursery/nanny split when the kids were younger, it was great. They had full busy days at nursery then days where they didn't have to be up and out early because the nanny came. They enjoyed both and were very settled.

It also meant we could use nursery for extra days if our nanny was on holiday and our nanny could help if they couldn't go to nursery...

monymonymony · 23/10/2026 07:44

CremeEggsForBreakfast · 22/10/2026 20:01

This is nonsense. A nursery absolutely does not replicate a close knit community.

In these tribal societies/communities do babies only socialise with other babies and do they outnumber adults 3:1? Do they stay in one room the entire day?

Who decided that these tribal communities were the best example of child raising practices and something we should seek to emulate anyway?

Nursery absolutely has its place and it can be enourmously beneficial to some children but it is definitely not the ideal for most babies.

A nanny can and does offer just as many social benefits. She can attend playgroups and classes and organise playdates around the child's preferences and natural rhythm and routines.

In this situation I would definitely opt for both nanny and nursery. And I'd keep the nanny and nursery days consecutive (e.g nanny Monday and Tuesday and nursery the rest of the week) so that the baby can start to predict who they will see each day and the week has a predictable structure to it.

To your questions, yes and yes. They stay in one hut and around it. Perhaps you should google this topic if of interest.

Cla7 · 22/10/2026 23:10

Mine started nursery at 1 (4 days/week) and he seemed to really enjoy it. Always came out with a big smile. But he’s quite outgoing and wants a lot of stimulation. If you have the option to use a nanny for some of the time, why not. It would give your child some downtime if needed. I don’t think having an additional carer is an issue, in other families it would be a grandparent who takes care of the child 1-2 days a week. Another advantage of a nanny might be that it would reduce the days you have to take off due to illnesses. I’m not talking about the occasions when a child is really poorly and wants mummy, but we often have the situation that my son gets send home from nursery because of a temperature or a loose poo, but then two hours later he’s absolutely fine. Due to nursery’s sickness policies, they have to stay off for 24-48 hours more, so I often lose two days of work looking after DS who shows no sign of illness and could have easily been with a nanny.

Avebury · 22/10/2026 23:06

A Nanny share is another more affordable option.

11plusherewego · 22/10/2026 22:48

A nanny wouldn’t offer those same social benefits.

A good nanny offers a very sociable life. They should be taking children to playgroups, organising play dates etc. When mine were small our nanny had a huge network of nanny friends to hang out with them and their charges.

PancakeCloud · 22/10/2026 21:33

AhMh67 · 22/10/2026 21:20

I've done nursery work for 20 odd years. 8 to 6 for 5 days a week is madness. That's longer than staff hours. They need home life as well. Nursery is loud busy chaotic. Most establishments are over run with additional needs kids. It's a nightmare. You need a child minder who can offer a home environment for comfort and support. If that's not possible get the nanny to break it up.

Thanks - I honestly thought it was quite normal. As a professional what do you think is healthy / appropriate for a 1 year old in terms of hours?

OP posts:
AhMh67 · 22/10/2026 21:20

I've done nursery work for 20 odd years. 8 to 6 for 5 days a week is madness. That's longer than staff hours. They need home life as well. Nursery is loud busy chaotic. Most establishments are over run with additional needs kids. It's a nightmare. You need a child minder who can offer a home environment for comfort and support. If that's not possible get the nanny to break it up.

EmmaB1309 · 22/10/2026 20:47

My daughter went to nursery from 10 months, for 3.5 days a week. I worked compressed hours which meant I had one day off and my mum had her a half day. Could compressed hours work if they won’t let you reduce to four days? As in, full time hours over four days? I made it work but it did mean slightly longer days.
My daughter experienced no ill effects whatsoever from nursery so the scaremongering on here is ridiculous. Or else you all experienced some rubbish nurseries. In ours, there was a dedicated 3 or 4 staff for each room, so the children were all seeing the same few familiar faces. This is what I’d advise you to look for. They definitely did not violate the 1:3 for the babies. They had cameras in each room that parents could check on and they encouraged drop in visits at any time! I decided against a childminder because I didn’t want to be tied to her holidays, sickness etc. Plus the couple I visited seemed to spend a lot of time driving around also doing nursery and school drop offs and pick ups and I didn’t want my baby spending half the day in a car!
having said that I don’t think sharing the care with a nanny is a bad idea at all. If you spend some time getting to know the nanny and getting baby used to her/him how is it any different to a child being looked after at nursery some days and a grandparent some days? Good nannies come to feel like part of the family don’t they?

maggisimpson · 22/10/2026 20:04

I've worked in early years for a long time and I'm not necessarily against babies in nurseries, but I would caution that 8-6, 5 days a week is much longer shifts than the adults will work. It is a full on environment and that's a lot for anyone to cope with.
Also means the babies will transition through a lot of caregivers in a day - the people doing the early shift might not be the same people working that room in the day or doing the late shift.

When I first started working in early years in the days of Sure Start, group size was a big priority for quality for under 2s care. Research showed that a max size of 6 babies per group was ideal and it shouldn't go over 8, regardless of the adult:child ratio.
Sure Start nurseries were always 6 babies max.
Unfortunately the funding and interest in high quality care for babies disappeared under the Tories and group sizes crept up and up.

If I was looking for a nursery for my own baby I would never choose somewhere with 12+ babies in a room.

CremeEggsForBreakfast · 22/10/2026 20:01

monymonymony · 22/10/2026 19:15

Worked for 7s

Nurseries replicate the environment modern society has taken away from our children: a chance to socialise with lots of peers, as they would have if we still lived in close-knit communities where women cared for each other’s babies and toddlers grew up alongside one another.

We’ve learned from looking at isolated tribal societies that a baby is held by eight different people throughout the day and breastfed by at least two women besides their mother. A mother holds her own baby for only 40% of the day. We’re simply not made to raise our children the way we do now, and the lack of contact with peers and other adults has a negative impact on children reaching Reception age.

Any teacher will tell you how much more a child who hasn’t attended nursery can struggle compared with one who has attended from an early age. Since you have the opportunity to choose full-time nursery, go for it without regrets. A nanny wouldn’t offer those same social benefits.

This is nonsense. A nursery absolutely does not replicate a close knit community.

In these tribal societies/communities do babies only socialise with other babies and do they outnumber adults 3:1? Do they stay in one room the entire day?

Who decided that these tribal communities were the best example of child raising practices and something we should seek to emulate anyway?

Nursery absolutely has its place and it can be enourmously beneficial to some children but it is definitely not the ideal for most babies.

A nanny can and does offer just as many social benefits. She can attend playgroups and classes and organise playdates around the child's preferences and natural rhythm and routines.

In this situation I would definitely opt for both nanny and nursery. And I'd keep the nanny and nursery days consecutive (e.g nanny Monday and Tuesday and nursery the rest of the week) so that the baby can start to predict who they will see each day and the week has a predictable structure to it.

maggisimpson · 22/10/2026 19:57

DancingonmyOwn88 · 22/10/2026 19:53

It’s a legal ratio. A good nursery will do everything they have in their power to achieve consistency. I have not been rude, merely factual.

The 1:3 is of course the legal ratio for the building and any half decent nursery will abide by that.
In practice of course a lot of the time you are not physically 1:3 in the room/on the floor as some adults will be doing other tasks.
For example a room of 12 one year olds has 4 adults, but one adult is making bottles or clearing up snack and one is in the sleep room getting a baby to sleep so it's actually 2 adults playing with, comforting, supervising 11 babies.

DancingonmyOwn88 · 22/10/2026 19:53

ThisCraftyAquaHedgehog · 22/10/2026 19:50

Please don't be so rude.

Yes the child will have a key worker, but they won't be working 50 hours a week. So a fair bit of the time, the child will be with other adults.
1:3 might happen on the best days, but lots of nurseries cut corners to manage staff breaks and sickness. And one adult looking after 3 just turned one year olds will mean less individual attention than an adult looking after a range of ages.

The poster asked why I wouldn't put my child in a nursery and I responded to answer why not.

It’s a legal ratio. A good nursery will do everything they have in their power to achieve consistency. I have not been rude, merely factual.

MxCactus · 22/10/2026 19:53

maggisimpson · 22/10/2026 19:51

Nurseries certainly don't replicate our traditional past 🤔
In hunter gatherer societies siblings would have been spaced 3-5 years apart, children would have played in mixed age groups, care of one infant was shared between many, and adults definitely wouldn't be trying to care for 3 babies each in a room of 15 babies while also cleaning up, providing tuff tray activities and updating the app every 5 minutes.

And no teacher will tell you that children who don't attend nursery as babies 'struggle'. That's pure nonsense.
Part time preschool attendance the year before they start school has benefits.

I think a childminder is a much more "natural" like environment for kids. Mixed age groups are really nice for kids/babies, and a consistent caregiver is huge for attachment. Nurseries usually have a roster of different staff

maggisimpson · 22/10/2026 19:51

monymonymony · 22/10/2026 19:15

Worked for 7s

Nurseries replicate the environment modern society has taken away from our children: a chance to socialise with lots of peers, as they would have if we still lived in close-knit communities where women cared for each other’s babies and toddlers grew up alongside one another.

We’ve learned from looking at isolated tribal societies that a baby is held by eight different people throughout the day and breastfed by at least two women besides their mother. A mother holds her own baby for only 40% of the day. We’re simply not made to raise our children the way we do now, and the lack of contact with peers and other adults has a negative impact on children reaching Reception age.

Any teacher will tell you how much more a child who hasn’t attended nursery can struggle compared with one who has attended from an early age. Since you have the opportunity to choose full-time nursery, go for it without regrets. A nanny wouldn’t offer those same social benefits.

Nurseries certainly don't replicate our traditional past 🤔
In hunter gatherer societies siblings would have been spaced 3-5 years apart, children would have played in mixed age groups, care of one infant was shared between many, and adults definitely wouldn't be trying to care for 3 babies each in a room of 15 babies while also cleaning up, providing tuff tray activities and updating the app every 5 minutes.

And no teacher will tell you that children who don't attend nursery as babies 'struggle'. That's pure nonsense.
Part time preschool attendance the year before they start school has benefits.

ThisCraftyAquaHedgehog · 22/10/2026 19:50

DancingonmyOwn88 · 22/10/2026 19:05

The staff ratio for under 2 is 1:3, so that’s simply not true that they’d be looking after ‘5 or 6’. They will also likely have a consistent qualified key worker. Stop spouting rubbish.

Please don't be so rude.

Yes the child will have a key worker, but they won't be working 50 hours a week. So a fair bit of the time, the child will be with other adults.
1:3 might happen on the best days, but lots of nurseries cut corners to manage staff breaks and sickness. And one adult looking after 3 just turned one year olds will mean less individual attention than an adult looking after a range of ages.

The poster asked why I wouldn't put my child in a nursery and I responded to answer why not.