Part time nanny - part time nursery?

Well yes, they will, if they aren’t adhering to safe sleep guidelines (which have recently been updated, not sure if you’re aware?) Essentially children can’t be left in eg a car seat or a pram to nap but have to be transferred to a cot. For a lot of children though this doesn’t work, as they instantly wake. So either childminders transfer a child who wakes up having had a short nap and then is ratty and miserable or they don’t go out if they have a child likely to nod off, which kind of negates the point of a childminder.

I don’t think it’s their fault; some of it is ridiculous expectations from OFSTED but some of it is just that several preschoolers is too much for one person, even with the ratios being as they are.

No one's going to grade a childminder inadequate for that either, I'm not sure what you think Ofsted do?
Ofsted aren't managers. They're regulators, they inspect childminders every 4-5 years to ensure they comply with the EYFS.

Well, yes, if it is a family but it isn’t, it’s managed by OFSTED. No one is going to grade me as inadequate if my baby falls asleep in the car and so my eldest and I have a late lunch!

But surely that's just the same as in a family set up and in my opinion one of the advantages of a childminder over a nursery with a baby room which isn't a natural set up at all.

Yes most do accept the 30 hours and there are some excellent childminders

I agree I wouldn't want to put a baby in nursery full-time if I had another option. So I'd explore the idea of a part time nanny or a good childminder. I don't see why it would be more difficult for them to adapt to than using grandparents a couple of days a week.

@AleaEim there are nurseries and nurseries and childminders and childminders and I do recognise that.

But the needs of even a ten month old and eighteen month old in terms of daily routine are very different and unless you have one of those very chill babies who naps anywhere you can end up with your baby having a toddler routine before they are ready.

My kids are long past nursery age, but in their nursery the staff worked 4 long days instead of 5 shorter days. That way staff weren’t leaving before the kids, they said the change to this system was better for the kids.

I work for the NHS and my kids went to the NHs staff nursery, with the children of many child psychologists, psychiatrists and paediatricians so nursery can’t be that bad!

Like someone else I don’t get the love for childminders on MN. At least nurseries are always open, and there is a stream of parents in and out. Childminders are less visible to the parents and there have been incidents like the recent prosecution of the childminder in Fife.

Would a nanny share be an option you could consider?

I used to work in nurseries and I disagree that needy babies get more attention in nurseries, quite the opposite actually. Nannies are better for needy babies and childminders can usually adapt things more easily so good as a second choice imo. A nursery has a strict routine they need to stick to regardless of what parents want whereas a nanny or childminder typically adapt to your schedule where possible.

@AleaEim tbf it can work well, but I do find even ‘good’ childminders have to be a bit creative when it comes to adapting routines for children of different ages, whereas in nursery settings the children are doomed according to age so you don’t have that challenge.

But I do know a lot of people who put their child with a CM for a more individual and personal experience and in fact it was the opposite. Needy babies often get on better in nurseries because there’s just more people around to hold or soothe them.

I think it depends, my dd went to her childminder at 13 months, she has three other children on her books who aren’t always there so sometimes my dd is by herself and sometimes she’s there with 2-3( normally 2) toddlers/preschoolers. They don’t demand all the attention at once like several babies would. Personally I’ve found it like an extended family, they’ve formed a relationship similar to siblings or cousins, the older ones teach the younger ones and learn to help too when needed. My dd has also grown fond of the childminders daughter who is 12, she asks for them when we’re home on the weekends.

I said upthread that she went to both nursery and childminder but we’ve taken out of nursery recently as she was thriving more with the childminder. One thing I noticed that in the summer the nursery kept children in all day during the heatwave whereas my childminder had them out in the shaded garden and her paddling pool. I can’t imagine being stuck inside a small nursery room with ten other babies is healthy.

edited to say I would try choose a childminder who doesn’t have older children and doesn’t do school drop offs etc.

I didn’t sent my oldest to nursery until he was 2.5 and had the same feelings as you but his brother went at 13 months (I pushed it back from 10 months last minute as he felt so little but actually think he’d have been fine and it was me that wasn’t) and settled incredibly well, genuinely seems happy to go in and big smiles on pick up. He did three days and two with different grandparents and he had no problems adjusting to this mix at all. He’s a very confident and adaptable child - very different personality to his brother who may not have been as ok with it all and is still a little unsettled by separation/transitions so personality possibly plays a big part in how they take to a nursery. Having been through it recently and also previously very unsure about having a baby in nursery if you have the right people/setting for your child they’ll be happy.

I was incredibly fussy about nursery settings, visited a lot, asked a lot of questions and if I felt in any way unsure I ruled it out. We have a long morning drop off because of this.

I think it’s nice for them to get to do some activities outside of nursery if you can afford a nanny and get use to other settings but it’s not essential and you can do things of a weekend.

So we don’t have a nanny but we do split the week between nursery and childminder and days with me and I think it works really well. We could now just have my 20m old in nursery but she loves her day with the childminder and the kids she sees there (childminders daughter is the same age as her) and I feel it gives a nice balance for her for the week - a day with me, a day at the childminder, 2.5 days nursery and 1/2 a day with DH. She is absolutely fine with the different settings and settled really really well. So splitting nanny and nursery could be really beneficial for the 1:1 time they’d get from the nanny.

Haha, I love the thought of hunter gatherer societies practicing gentle parenting 😂

The only articles I could find about hunter-gather communities raising their children co-operativly stated the very opposite of your assertion - the adults outnumber the children and the children were held for many more hours a day than they would be in Western societies - especially if that child were to be in a nursery. Children were also soothed very quickly when they began to cry.
Where it talks about "childcare" away from the mother the set-up is described as "multi-aged" so not one hut for babies and another for toddlers and another for pre-schoolers.
The study was suggesting (not stating as fact) that this may be the model to which we are biologically primed.
So definitely not promoting western childcare models.

I don't know what you read but I suggest you double check your sources before using it to defend your ingrained belief.

I think it is quite normal around me. Both my kids have been to nursery doing those hours 5 days a week since 10/11 months old and they’re fine. We have quality time at the weekends and see each other in the mornings and evenings. Quite a few people I know do the same and others do the same but maybe only 4 days.

mumsnet is weird about nurseries but if you can’t drop your hours / days then there is no other choice. Our nursery is quite small and nurturing and they definitely get something out of it socially - my youngest has just turned 18m and she has formed great bonds with the staff and other babies. She is happy going in and absolutely thriving.

It isn’t, because at home with three under 5s isn’t monitored by OFSTED. With your own children, you can do as you wish. Childminders can’t.

Three under 5s in a family home is pretty much the definition of a home from home environment.
It definitely isn't an institution 🤔
The slightly stricter sleep rules haven't affected most childminders.
I had 3 under 5s of my own and of course you try to work their naps around each other, if they all were on different schedules it would be a nightmare?

We had a balance of both. It added flexibility and DC were fine with it. Nanny would do things like take them to classes, swimming lessons, hanging out with nanny friends and their children and do cooking etc with them. Nursery gave them different experiences.
Nanny had the advantage that she would look after them on days when they wouldn’t be well enough for nursery for example.

I probably wouldn’t go for a childminder for a baby to be honest.

Childminders have multiple children of different ages and tend to try to get them all on the same routine with sleep. Nap conditions have recently been made much stricter so this has compounded this problem. It’s nice to think it’s a cuddly home from home environment but it isn’t really, it’s just a different type of institution.

There is simply no evidence to suggest any damage to children from 'noisy nurseries'.

I know a lot of people spout the line of teachers can tell which children have or haven't been in childcare.
Please ignore.
There is little benefit for a child being in childcare until over 3. They need to be with their primary carer, wherever possible, until that age.
So much evidence around about the damage being done to children through long hours in noisy nurseries. It's just not popular to comment on it.
Short periods away from parents is fine but the hours proposed by OP are too long.

Most year round nurseries operate 8-6 and expect you to send dc at least two days so this afternoon nanny set up wouldn’t suit I’d imagine. Term time nurseries tend to operate 9-3 or mornings only which I don’t think you are looking for.

@PancakeCloud i sent my dd to both nursery and childminder from jan this year, 2 days full days nursery and 3 full days with childminder, she was 13 months. My dd who was at the time v sociable and resilient settled into both very well and never cried with either setting so I don’t think having two providers is a problem imo. However, I was never fully happy with the nursery despite it being outstanding rated, it lacked personal touch, they didn’t notice certain things about her development that the childminder did and they were a bit showy in that they had lots of incredible resources but really lacked other things I valued like consistency, attachment, personable nature. She was constantly sick as well and I know most of the illnesses were form nursery as the manager would let us know in the group chat when something was going around. The childminders mindees were rarely ill.

Anyway, fast forward to now and I’ve decided to take my dd out of the nursery and just keep her with the childminder. She was extremely distressed when they moved her to the toddler room this autumn and started to catch every illness again so I just thought what the hell am I doing. She will likely go back there for preschool part time if I can’t find anywhere better but it will just be to get her ready for school and I’d only send her 2-3 days at most.