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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

Original poster

Inset days

156 replies

Perfect28 · 25/03/2026 16:40

Two working teacher parents to (luckily) just one child. Child has started school this year and we are finding inset days impossible to manage. 5 per year, usual wraparound childcare is closed on insets as they mirror the school. No family less than 300 miles away, my mum has come up twice now but she won't be able to come up 5 times a year for the next however many years. As we are teachers working from home or requesting annual leave is impossible. We can take parental leave but that has to be in blocks of one week at a time so not helpful here.

Just posting in case someone has any grand ideas or suggestions I've not yet mentioned. Otherwise I guess it will have to be sick days? Not hugely helpful when I'm already managing chronic illness.

Anyone?

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LikeASoulWithoutAMind · 25/03/2026 17:46

Does your local secondary school or college offer childcare courses? Ours does and the students who study childcare need to get hands on experience so are often very keen to do babysitting.

Or how about one of the online agencies? (my friend used sitters.co.uk but I'm sure there are alternative options)

ImImmortalNowBabyDoll · 25/03/2026 17:45

Perfect28 · 25/03/2026 17:42

@ImImmortalNowBabyDollall perfectly legal, checked with union.

Most schools would try and avoid this option because they know it would piss off staff but they absolutely can do it.

Timetabling often isn't finalized until the end of summer term, leaving no wriggle room or even adequate time to hand in your notice.
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Ugh. I'm sorry. This is one of many reasons why my husband and I left teaching but I suppose if you enjoy your job that doesn't help.

Original poster
Perfect28 · 25/03/2026 17:42

@ImImmortalNowBabyDollall perfectly legal, checked with union.

Most schools would try and avoid this option because they know it would piss off staff but they absolutely can do it.

Timetabling often isn't finalized until the end of summer term, leaving no wriggle room or even adequate time to hand in your notice.
.

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Original poster
Perfect28 · 25/03/2026 17:40

dammitohdammit · 25/03/2026 17:37

In the area I live in there are childminders who run an ad hoc childcare service. That would be perfect for you so worth looking to see if there is similar where you are?
Im surprised, though, that all your inset days are at the same time. That’s not my experience at all, I definitely had a child in and and a child out when I had one at primary and one at secondary.

Inset days are not on the same days, that's part of the problem. If they were I would request to do inset from home.

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ImImmortalNowBabyDoll · 25/03/2026 17:40

Perfect28 · 25/03/2026 17:39

That would work well. Unfortunately our schools both tell us we can't choose our day off and even contractually we could be timetabled across all 5 days even on a part time contract. Given that we are in different schools we figure that it would be practically impossible to align working days. I also work 4 days which does help when these school events happen to fall on that day.

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I'm pretty sure that's not legal.

CaptainMyCaptain · 25/03/2026 17:40

LadyOfLymeHouse · 25/03/2026 16:44

At schools where I've worked teachers can bring their children in for INSET days. Some stay in their parent's class, others might go to their year group with the agreement of that class teacher.

Also I used to go to school with my Dad on 'Baker Days', as they used to be called, back in the 1980s. I used to love it!

I used to do that with my child sometimes. Other times my parents who lived quite a distance away would visit for a few days including the INSET day.

Original poster
Perfect28 · 25/03/2026 17:39

Hobbitfeet32 · 25/03/2026 17:36

Me and husband both work 4 days. He has Monday off and I have Friday off. Helps to cover the inset days as they tend to either be a Monday or Friday

That would work well. Unfortunately our schools both tell us we can't choose our day off and even contractually we could be timetabled across all 5 days even on a part time contract. Given that we are in different schools we figure that it would be practically impossible to align working days. I also work 4 days which does help when these school events happen to fall on that day.

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ImImmortalNowBabyDoll · 25/03/2026 17:39

Is the school holiday club not open? Or can you find a babysitter for a one off?

Hobbitfeet32 · 25/03/2026 17:38

Also not all play dates have to be reciprocal. I often have kids here. I don’t do it so that mine can go to there’s. It doesn’t have to be transactional necessarily

dammitohdammit · 25/03/2026 17:37

In the area I live in there are childminders who run an ad hoc childcare service. That would be perfect for you so worth looking to see if there is similar where you are?
Im surprised, though, that all your inset days are at the same time. That’s not my experience at all, I definitely had a child in and and a child out when I had one at primary and one at secondary.

Hobbitfeet32 · 25/03/2026 17:36

Me and husband both work 4 days. He has Monday off and I have Friday off. Helps to cover the inset days as they tend to either be a Monday or Friday

Revoltingpheasants · 25/03/2026 17:33

Sympathy OP. If DH was a teacher it would be impossible.

I’d ring in sick. I’m not sure what else you can realistically do.

Unexpectedlysinglemum · 25/03/2026 17:32

Ask other parents to do it in exchange for you doing a days babysitting in the school holidays

Original poster
Perfect28 · 25/03/2026 17:32

@Hobbitfeet32thank you, I appreciate that perhaps I'm just having a bit of a whinge. Friends all work (don't most people), family are miles away- mostly in other countries, childcare is not available otherwise I would happily pay for it, I'm not complaining about paying for childcare!

Seems the only option is to rely on playdates (really stressful option because we are a neurodiverse family and friendships are difficult for all of us) or quit working.

Feels more and more like working is not worth it. Sometimes I need to vent!

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Skybluetoo · 25/03/2026 17:31

Ask one of their friend’s parents if they’ll have them, and then offer them a day in the holiday in return?

Hobbitfeet32 · 25/03/2026 17:29

What solutions have you come up with? Essentially you need to find someone to look after your child. The options are one of the child’s parents, a friend or relative or pay for childcare. I’m not sure what else you think would work?

WonderingWanda · 25/03/2026 17:26

I thinkmin this situation you need to go and speak to your head and ask about it. One of you will likely need to take unpaid leave.

Original poster
Perfect28 · 25/03/2026 17:24

I appreciate all the comments about friends and play dates, but we are both autistic and this social elemental of parenting is really difficult. It's also another task that would likely fall to me as the more socially masking parent so I'm really hoping for alternatives because this honestly fills me with dread.

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Original poster
Perfect28 · 25/03/2026 17:21

We are both secondary, at separate schools. He is in primary, so no it would not be appropriate to take him to school with us.

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Ilovefriday · 25/03/2026 17:19

It might be worth asking the staff at the wrap round care if they do ad hoc babysitting? It's possible that they might like to do this to earn some extra money.

CheddarCheeseAndCrispSandwich · 25/03/2026 17:13

When my girls were young, I’d organise play dates and reciprocated at a later date. Worked for me 🤷‍♀️

Icecreamandcoffee · 25/03/2026 16:57

Childcare swaps with other parents. Or babysitter but you may need to be very organised arranging this if other childcare providers are closed as other parents will also be booking the babysitters.

Springiscoming368 · 25/03/2026 16:53

Make good friends with another parent. Offer if they can help with some inset days you can help with the holidays. Win win. Start with your child’s good friends.

Rocknrollstar · 25/03/2026 16:50

Don’t you have any friends? When I was teaching my DC would go to friends for the day - I would reciprocate in the school holidays or at weekends. Before I went back to work a friend would pay me to have her children when she was at college.

LadyOfLymeHouse · 25/03/2026 16:49

Pistachiocake · 25/03/2026 16:47

Request that they do online training, so you can wfh. It would be a good example for the school to set to the community, as teachers would not have to drive in. Online schools do all their training this way, so there should be no problem, as the staff say it's much more efficient online.

That's a nice idea but only works if the children and parents have the same INSET days. If they are at different schools they might not.

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