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Original poster

Childminder ignoring baby

40 replies

Loonaandalf · 01/12/2025 20:47

Does anyone have or know of a child about 13-14 months called Mabel who has a nanny or childminder who was in a Greenwich soft play today? I saw awful neglect from her minder, as soon as she entered the soft play cafe, she plonked the baby down in a soft play area on her own, when other children were running around. There was beads and other toys that weren’t necessarily age appropriate in the soft play. She didn’t even look around to make sure it was safe or even to see if the child was ok with being left. The childminder sat outside the soft play area with her friend chatting with her back turned, there was no interaction (apart from one time when it was time for the girl to eat) the whole time we were there (30 mins) and the baby was just left there. I told the woman that there was beads in the soft play that looked like they’d fallen off a necklace but she just said ‘oh yeah, thanks’ she didn’t come in and supervise the child even after that. She then plonked the baby in a high chair with no straps on, it just all seemed very neglectful and I can’t stop thinking about it. I hope someone who knows Mabel sees this thread and tells the parents.

OP posts:
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MangerThings · 15/12/2025 00:18

jannier · 14/12/2025 12:34

So the baby was in no harm then, the baby wasnt crying and seemed happy, whats got your goat is they were not sat in with it physically playing with it becouse they in your opinion were being paid to be on top of the child 24/7 not allowing the child any self discovery time and they are not allowed any downtime in the average 10 hour day a child is in childcare.

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I really, really, really hope you are not a childminder or nanny. I completely don’t understand why you are so dismissive of loads of people’s valid comments and seem so hung up on validating leaving a very young baby to their own devices unobserved. It’s weird.

Not many parents do the whole “hover round them at every moment” thing, bevause that would send most people over the edge. However there is a middle ground that 90% of responsible parents seem to adhere to just fine. Freedom in the under 3 area, with regular oversight at that age, surely? What happens if they have a freak accident or choke on something (silently - that’s how choking works by the way… )?

My 18 year old kid takes littlies to soft play and other child friendly environments, and there isn’t a hope in hell she’d order a latte, then spend an hour chatting to her friends.

MangerThings · 15/12/2025 00:09

@BoredZelda i feel like I am missing a subtext here - it wouldn’t be the first time.

Anyone care to enlighten me what’s going on?!

BoredZelda · 14/12/2025 12:44

RichPetuniaAgain · 05/12/2025 21:46

Hi OP, I wanted to come on here and thank you for looking out for that little girl. Unfortunately, as with every job, there are people who are good at what they do and people who aren’t. You are doing the right thing trying to find her family 💐.

Welcome back! How lovely of you to come back after 9 months of silence to support OP. 👍

NormasArse · 14/12/2025 12:41

jannier · 14/12/2025 12:34

So the baby was in no harm then, the baby wasnt crying and seemed happy, whats got your goat is they were not sat in with it physically playing with it becouse they in your opinion were being paid to be on top of the child 24/7 not allowing the child any self discovery time and they are not allowed any downtime in the average 10 hour day a child is in childcare.

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From the OP, I get the impression that the person looking after the child was not watching her. In fact her back was turned. Surely that’s a basic necessity? She doesn’t need to be in there playing, but watching a small child is what she’s being paid for.

jannier · 14/12/2025 12:34

Loonaandalf · 14/12/2025 11:15

I didn’t expect anyone to search the soft play, why are you making stuff up? I could have left the beads there and said nothing to the woman who wasn’t supervising the child, maybe I should have sat back and observed how long it took the child to find them and choke.

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So the baby was in no harm then, the baby wasnt crying and seemed happy, whats got your goat is they were not sat in with it physically playing with it becouse they in your opinion were being paid to be on top of the child 24/7 not allowing the child any self discovery time and they are not allowed any downtime in the average 10 hour day a child is in childcare.

MangerThings · 14/12/2025 11:33

Some people will start an argument with their own shadow!

Well done OP for looking out for this kid, and I agree, turning your back on a 13/14 month old baby in a public place is neglectful. Can’t believe some people think it is OK, and I am not a helicopter parent by any means.

Original poster
Loonaandalf · 14/12/2025 11:15

jannier · 12/12/2025 21:28

Not thick obtuse or any other insult just think your odd for clearing up the hazard you can see then expecting other customers to search the soft play for hidden beads because you think they are childminders for some presumptuse reason....rather than slag off the staff who are paid and presumably trained for risk assessment for their failure to leap into the soft play and check it.

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I didn’t expect anyone to search the soft play, why are you making stuff up? I could have left the beads there and said nothing to the woman who wasn’t supervising the child, maybe I should have sat back and observed how long it took the child to find them and choke.

OP posts:
jannier · 12/12/2025 21:28

Loonaandalf · 12/12/2025 14:19

@jannier you are unbelievably obtuse, I do hope you don’t look after children, you’re not really capable of basic comprehension/ reading or writing are you? I did say upthread (and it’s not even a long threat) that I did notify staff. I still don’t know what that has got to do with this post though but you are pretty obsessive aren’t you?

Not thick obtuse or any other insult just think your odd for clearing up the hazard you can see then expecting other customers to search the soft play for hidden beads because you think they are childminders for some presumptuse reason....rather than slag off the staff who are paid and presumably trained for risk assessment for their failure to leap into the soft play and check it.

Original poster
Loonaandalf · 12/12/2025 14:19

@jannier you are unbelievably obtuse, I do hope you don’t look after children, you’re not really capable of basic comprehension/ reading or writing are you? I did say upthread (and it’s not even a long threat) that I did notify staff. I still don’t know what that has got to do with this post though but you are pretty obsessive aren’t you?

OP posts:
jannier · 10/12/2025 11:48

MakeItToTheMoon · 09/12/2025 22:53

If possible could you return to the same soft play at the same time/ day of week on the chance you may see them again?

You felt uncomfortable for a reason and I’m glad there are people out there who look out for the wellbeing of a child (especially small helpless ones).

Surely any care giver would be concerned if another person told them there was a potential danger to that child. You would stop your conversation and run off to see to the child!

Side note: ignore the posters that pick on the most minute detail instead of looking at the fact you are concerned about a child. It’s like you’ve done something wrong!

The op had already picked up all the beads she could see she should have notified staff that there maybe more. The same way i tell staff ive just asked a child to leave the baby area as they are too old or that a child is eating in soft play.
Most argument is her assumption its a childminder.

Original poster
Loonaandalf · 10/12/2025 07:13

MakeItToTheMoon · 09/12/2025 22:53

If possible could you return to the same soft play at the same time/ day of week on the chance you may see them again?

You felt uncomfortable for a reason and I’m glad there are people out there who look out for the wellbeing of a child (especially small helpless ones).

Surely any care giver would be concerned if another person told them there was a potential danger to that child. You would stop your conversation and run off to see to the child!

Side note: ignore the posters that pick on the most minute detail instead of looking at the fact you are concerned about a child. It’s like you’ve done something wrong!

Thank you, there’s some strange posters on here and worrying to think some of these are parents/ childcare professionals and don’t see anything wrong. That’s a good idea actually; I could try return on the same day I’m sure.

OP posts:
MakeItToTheMoon · 09/12/2025 22:53

If possible could you return to the same soft play at the same time/ day of week on the chance you may see them again?

You felt uncomfortable for a reason and I’m glad there are people out there who look out for the wellbeing of a child (especially small helpless ones).

Surely any care giver would be concerned if another person told them there was a potential danger to that child. You would stop your conversation and run off to see to the child!

Side note: ignore the posters that pick on the most minute detail instead of looking at the fact you are concerned about a child. It’s like you’ve done something wrong!

Blondeshavemorefun · 09/12/2025 21:54

If you were that concerned why didn’t you say something to the carer

was the child crying ?

I get the bit about beads but the rest of it doesn’t seem a big deal - if the child was happy

Original poster
Loonaandalf · 09/12/2025 15:45

jannier · 08/12/2025 09:21

She called her thread childminder ignores .....not baby being ignored, not teacher, parent, nanny....then admits she doesn't know and justification is they were talking about childminding.....just like she is in thevthread and loads of people do without being one. In my experience its typically parents ignoring their kids maybe i should start a thread everytime ive been at the top of soft play and had to rescue an unattended toddler or when ive had to tell older children to leave the baby area.

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Are you a childminder who ignores their kids? You seem very sensitive.

OP posts:
Original poster
Loonaandalf · 09/12/2025 15:42

jannier · 08/12/2025 08:12

But not what you titled your thread. Also even though talking about childminding they may be their own children and considering it so discussing it.
Im still amazed you knew beadd were there but hadnt acted on it until after child went in and you told them about the beads.

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What are you on about? Have you a problem with basic comprehension or have you had a few day drinks?
Where did I say I left the beads in the soft play and only did something about them when the child came in? I said I noticed beads at one point when my child was playing, I therefore picked up the beads and notified the woman who had left her child unattended as there could have been more somewhere for all anyone knew? Why are you so hung up about what I did or didn’t do with the beads but you seem less concerned with a child being unsupervised?

OP posts:
Original poster
Loonaandalf · 09/12/2025 15:37

Bananaandmangosmoothie · 08/12/2025 06:16

It makes a big difference because if you had a serious safeguarding concern about a child who was being cared for by a childminder, you could complain to Ofsted.

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Yeah I’d be able to do that if I knew the person’s name but i don’t. Hence why I’m here posting as there’s not much else I can do about it is there?

OP posts:
jannier · 08/12/2025 09:21

HoppityBun · 08/12/2025 08:17

Where has @Loonaandalf bad mouthed a profession? She’s highlighted one instance where she’s worried about a child and is trying to do something about it.

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She called her thread childminder ignores .....not baby being ignored, not teacher, parent, nanny....then admits she doesn't know and justification is they were talking about childminding.....just like she is in thevthread and loads of people do without being one. In my experience its typically parents ignoring their kids maybe i should start a thread everytime ive been at the top of soft play and had to rescue an unattended toddler or when ive had to tell older children to leave the baby area.

Nickyknackered · 08/12/2025 08:31

HoppityBun · 08/12/2025 08:17

Where has @Loonaandalf bad mouthed a profession? She’s highlighted one instance where she’s worried about a child and is trying to do something about it.

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I think as childminders, it can be hurtful to use the title as 'catch all' for naming care givers/ babysitters/ anyone who isnt mum... even when people aren't (or when they are!) sure what the profession is.

We already face a lot of blanket judgements against the profession and this can further stereotype the image that people wouldn't trust a cm, and reading the thread title without clicking on it leads to further proof to some that we are no good. Many many thousands of childminders take their role extremely seriously and professionally and to have it used as a throw away comment in a damaging title can feel hurtful when it isnt even a registered childminder committing the act.

HoppityBun · 08/12/2025 08:17

jannier · 05/12/2025 21:17

Because if she's a nanny your bad mouthing a proffession unjustly. It would be very unlikely that a childminder has one child to care for even more unlikely that two childminders have only 2 child each...basically they would be paying more to get into soft play than they are earning per hour.

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Where has @Loonaandalf bad mouthed a profession? She’s highlighted one instance where she’s worried about a child and is trying to do something about it.

jannier · 08/12/2025 08:12

Loonaandalf · 08/12/2025 06:06

It’s impossible for me to know whether she was a childminder or a nanny though isn’t it so that’s why i said nanny or childminder. Plenty of childminders just have one child some days, I’ve went to view some and they all had one child or some had none that day. They weren’t paying into soft play, it was a cafe with a soft play.

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But not what you titled your thread. Also even though talking about childminding they may be their own children and considering it so discussing it.
Im still amazed you knew beadd were there but hadnt acted on it until after child went in and you told them about the beads.

Bananaandmangosmoothie · 08/12/2025 06:16

Loonaandalf · 05/12/2025 10:20

Could be a nanny or childminder, does it matter? As I said above, I did pick up the beads but what’s that got to do with a childminder not doing her job?

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It makes a big difference because if you had a serious safeguarding concern about a child who was being cared for by a childminder, you could complain to Ofsted.

Original poster
Loonaandalf · 08/12/2025 06:06

RichPetuniaAgain · 05/12/2025 21:46

Hi OP, I wanted to come on here and thank you for looking out for that little girl. Unfortunately, as with every job, there are people who are good at what they do and people who aren’t. You are doing the right thing trying to find her family 💐.

Thank you.

OP posts:
Original poster
Loonaandalf · 08/12/2025 06:06

jannier · 05/12/2025 21:17

Because if she's a nanny your bad mouthing a proffession unjustly. It would be very unlikely that a childminder has one child to care for even more unlikely that two childminders have only 2 child each...basically they would be paying more to get into soft play than they are earning per hour.

Show quote history

It’s impossible for me to know whether she was a childminder or a nanny though isn’t it so that’s why i said nanny or childminder. Plenty of childminders just have one child some days, I’ve went to view some and they all had one child or some had none that day. They weren’t paying into soft play, it was a cafe with a soft play.

OP posts:
RichPetuniaAgain · 05/12/2025 21:46

Hi OP, I wanted to come on here and thank you for looking out for that little girl. Unfortunately, as with every job, there are people who are good at what they do and people who aren’t. You are doing the right thing trying to find her family 💐.

jannier · 05/12/2025 21:20

Lillypoe · 05/12/2025 10:50

It's not unusual based on my experience taking dcs to soft play and toddler classes. It's an easy break for them - the child is too young to say anything and as long as they come back fed and changed the parent will be none the wiser.
I doubt you'll manage to track down the parents on such a big site but agree with trying more local groups.

An easy break for them.....who nanny's, parents chatting about childminding, grans....in reality I take mine to soft play and have to fend off feral kids eating, pushing, biting etc whilst mummy is on her phone it's bloody hard work

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