First time employing nanny - need to ask if I should pay nanny for drop-in groups?

i have a credit card and is so much easier - as athene said, you can still keep track of exspenses and only need to worry if a £450 gets spent on some Manolo Blahnik shoes

everything i spend goes on it - unless £2 for M&T etc

glad your nanny seems to be working out

thereare some nice ones of us about

Glad it went well. You might want to include the nanny in your decision. She will probably appreciate being consulted. You could just say to her that you are new to this and was wondering if it would be easier if you just handed over a set rate of expenses and she can use the money as she wants and that way no one has to worry about keeping track of receipts and which child ate what, etc. Perhaps suggest you give her say £40 per month to cover transportation, activities, food, etc. not including anything you specifically ask her to do. For example, you might ask her to pick up nappies or run my the pharmacy, in which case you should obviously give her the money for those one off expenses.

For expenses such as these, I give my nanny a credit card (with a very low limit so not too much damage could be done if she lost it). So if I ask her to pick up some school uniforms, or get someone a birthday present she just puts it on the card. I don't have to mess with expenses and reimbursing this and that but I can still sign on the card account online and see where the money is going.

you mean like a theme park etc

hmmmmmmmmmmm - still think the nanny should pay for their own child - they are lucky to be able to bring their child with them to work, and dont see why the mb should have to pay for them - although very generous if they did

going on internet and getting bogof vouchers, as i did today saves money - managed to save mb over £10today

Imananny - what if the employer wanted her children to go somewhere very expensive - say an outing that was £30 per head?

i think that the employer should pay for her child/ren and the nanny entrances to groups/farms, lunch out etc

but

the nanny should pay for her own child entrances

a monthly set budget is a good idea., and the nanny can spend it how she wants

anna - i have never known of any of my friends mb paying for their nannys child to go to places

Ah, we can agree on something. I too like to send nanny to do things I hate. Like swimming. I hate swimming. But nanny and the kids love it. So off they go... without me.

Thinking about it, the reason I like the pay as you go is that it enables me to pay the nanny to take my daughter (and friends) to places she really wants to go to that I hate

I think that the big advantage of your system, Athene, is there is a fixed monthly budget for activities (which also sets a budget for the nanny's child, which she can then anticipate).

The advantage of pay as you go with no budget is that the employer has free rein of decision making on all activities and if he/she chooses to indulge the children, that's possible.

Yes, it does sound like a win-win situation.

Anyway, I think you and I have demonstrated the complications that can arrive and proven the the OP will have an easier life if she just asks nanny for an average expense per day cost and hand that over to the nanny.

(btw it's a great deal for everyone concerned - I get totally flexible childcare, and the other family get to keep on a full-time nanny they would otherwise not be able to justify since I am subsidising her wages)

I think it's a similar issue - the decision-maker pays for everyone who must comply.

So - in my case (by prior arrangement however with the other parent) - I pay the nanny (she gets to make some extra cash) and I pay for the activities I decide on for everyone.

I could decide they should all go to the (free) park every week. I can also decide they are all going to go to the cinema and for goûter at Ladurée.

shhh... don't tell anyone.

You are American, are you not?

Ah, you pay the salary too. That's probably fair then. But, still it's not the same thing because neither of the children involved belong to the nanny.

No, I pay the nanny on those afternoons.

Anna, I think you are comparing apples and oranges. You friend pays the nannies salary, probably liing costs, etc. I'd say you have a cush deal if you are just paying for the activities.

But, you are missing the point that his is a nanny share. I'm not making this up. This is generally how it works in the UK. Your expereince in France may or may not be different. And you may know more than I do about a variety of subjects, but employing a nanny in the UK is not one of them.

Athene - I was not making a comment about the activity in the OP but a general point about how the employer should think about meeting her employee's expenses moving forward.

FWIW, my daughter sometimes gets looked after by a friend's nanny in the afternoon. On those afternoons, I decide on the activity and I pay for everyone (nanny, my friends children and my daughter) to do it. That is the deal I have. Not saying you must do it that way, but morally as decision maker I think I should.

"Is it reasonable for an employer to impose an expensive activity upon her nanny, to meet the nanny's out-of-pocket expenses but not the nanny's accompanying child, when the nanny has no option but to comply? No."

1- I don't think a drop in play group qualifies as an "expensive activity".

2- You have made an assumption that the employer imposed this activity upon nanny. Perhaps she did? But, then again, perhaps nanny took it upon herself to go to the playgroup.

I think if an employer says "takke DD to Arty tots today" then employer should be prepared to hand over the fee for attending arty tots today. But, if there is a kitty in the kitchen and nanny decide to go to arty tots, then the cost should come out of the kitty. And if there is not enough in the kitty to cover it, then the trip to arty tots needs approval from the employer before they go to Arty tots.

Athena - like I said, it's a moot point.

Is it reasonable for an employer to impose an expensive activity upon her nanny, to meet the nanny's out-of-pocket expenses but not the nanny's accompanying child, when the nanny has no option but to comply? No.

If the employer wants to take all decisions concerning her children's activities, she needs to decide where the nanny has to meet her child's expenses (under a certain £ threshold) and where the employer should, IMVHO. And this needs to be written into the contract with the nanny.

Yes, my nanny is live-in. She works five long days and certainly earns any perks I can afford to offer her.

Anna, a nanny who brings her own child is generally regarded as a nanny share with the nanny. The nanny's child is the nanny's responsibility.

Also, I think there is a difference between the employer telling nanny to go to play group x on WEdnesday morning and the nanny deciding herslef that that will be the activity for the day.

If nanny decides to stop for lunch on the way home, then the employer should pay for nanny's meal and child's meal, but not nanny's child's meal.

This is genreally the accepted practice. It can get rather complicated on who should pay for what. So I suggest just a set rate of expenses each month and let nanny decide where and how to spend them (within reason of course).

we had a jam jar in the kitchen cupboard with £30 in as slush fund - and gave her additional for petrol as required - I'm guessing that athene's nanny is live-in, and yours is live-out... otherwise, all the nannies would want to work for athene, and none for me....

I think paying for the daughter is a moot point. If you are obliging the nanny to go somewhere, you must meet her out-of-pocket expenses - I would include the daughter in that. Otherwise you might find nanny is reluctant to do as much as you would like her to do with your children.