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Impact of nursery on under 3s

80 replies

trufflesandolives · 09/05/2025 07:58

My DS who is nearly 1 is due to start 2 days of nursery a week from next week and I've only just come across Erica Komisar's work claiming that nursery is psychologically damaging for under 3s who should remain with their primary caregiver. Obviously I've been aware of arguments in both camps but hearing it come from a child attachment specialist hit a bit harder than hearing it come from other mums or social media. Since then I've looked into other options (again), considering a nanny (they are significantly more expensive) and looking for coworking spaces with childcare (since I work remotely) but there don't seem to be any in my area. My question is does anyone know of any other significant research around children and nursery in the early years? I'd like to find out if research in both camps is equally extensive and significant or if what Komisar quotes is the scientific consensus. I don't bother talking about it with friends or family because all I hear is unqualified opinions telling me that my DS will benefit from the socialising which isn't, as far as I know, supported by evidence.

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Gazelda · 09/05/2025 09:23

I am not an expert. I haven’t carried out extensive research.

but my own experience was that a good nursery, combined with a loving and stable home environment worked well for my DD. She experienced socialising, getting to know other caregivers who she built a trusting bond with in an environment which stimulated her. Meanwhile, my working enabled me to afford trips, experiences, outings, baby groups etc as well as quality time alone with her. DH was able to work regular hours which meant he was home for bathtime, weekends etc.

as I say, this work well for DD who is an only child.

NotEntirelyAccurate · 09/05/2025 08:34

A good setting will be of no harm under 3 , and of benefit to the child after 3. Under 3 the benefit is indirect but allows parents to provide for their child. Nursery is only harmful- at any age - if the setting and staff are poor.

Devilsmommy · 09/05/2025 08:32

I'd have thought a childminder would be better as it's the same key worker all the time so a better bond is formed

LostMySocks · 09/05/2025 08:10

Generally in nurseries, but especially in the baby room the children have a key worker. For part timers they will choose someone in on their days. There is a core of fixed staff.
My DS had his key worker changed as he bonded better with a different staff member.
As always it's dependent on the nursery. If you're happy with the nursery and how they interact it can be like a big extended family with focus on the kids rather than housework.
Your little one will still have you every morning, when waking in the night and in the evening.

ICantPretend · 09/05/2025 08:01

Emily Oster is good on this, presenting proper balance. Essentially it's neutral under 3, good for over that.