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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

Original poster

I give up with this Au Pair milarky...

40 replies

MrsRecycle · 18/05/2008 16:52

..yes I'm probably the last person you'd hear saying that but we are finished with Au Pairs - that is even dh speaking. I cannot believe how we take a girl off the streets, give her a home and family and she repays it by doing a moonlight flit. She texted me whilst we were away on Saturday to say she had left us. No notice, no goodbyes to the LOs who idolised her, just gone.

I hope you've all picked yourselves up off the floor now...

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Original poster
MrsRecycle · 19/05/2008 10:40

stab in the back completely ingles - as of last week she was completely happy with us. The thing that dh is really about is that she couldn't be bothered to tell us face to face that she was leaving.

My wonderful CM has volunteered to help out so we'll be okay.

Harriet - I've had APs for 5 years now - our 1st is visiting in two weeks time - they were definitely a different caliber a few years ago. My days of APs are gone - thank goodness. You know what this morning, I did the school run, dealt with baby, did the washing, cleaned the kitchen and made it to work (on M25) without the stress of telling an AP what to do. Freedom at last.

OP posts:
ingles2 · 18/05/2008 22:19

Mrs R!!!!!!
I'm gobsmacked!
you loved her, she seemed to love you!
Am very very for you

I swear the days of AP's are over.....

HarrietTheSpy · 18/05/2008 22:16

All of these recent threads have really scared me. I was seriously considering some form of Au Pair help after maternity leave.

Original poster
MrsRecycle · 18/05/2008 19:33

thanks pc - she left notes to all the family basically blaming me for her having to leave. I am as she never told me she was unhappy but she seemed to have no problem discussing it with all her df's and family. So I was meant to be a mind reader and know that "I love your family" means I am not happy. We will manage - my df has voluteered to assist - just have to wangle a few more WFH's.

I will definitely ring you if I need a rant...

OP posts:
Paddlechick666 · 18/05/2008 19:15

hi MrsR, did she not give any explanation at all [nosy]

wish i was in a better position to be able to help out in real times. failing that, always on the end of the phone for a rant when you need.

hope the next few weeks aren't too stressful.

Original poster
MrsRecycle · 18/05/2008 18:52

she would have been homeless as it was her last night staying at her df's AP-family home. I really don't know what her reason was but I just wished she'd had the decency to be honest when we laughed and joked the other night. We let someone into our home and family and this is the treatment we receive in return.

Imananny - thanks for your wishes, I'm sure we'll cope - they can go to after school club. This is definitely the last AP we ever have - I'm not sure what we'll do from Sept but I have a couple of options available.

OP posts:
yogimum · 18/05/2008 18:10

Maybe she was homesick, however she should have told you that she was leaving. How did you take her "off the streets"?

NotABanana · 18/05/2008 18:08

Of course there was more to it Anna8888. Jeez.

Anna8888 · 18/05/2008 17:57

NotABanana - and ironing children's socks was a reason to be unhappy in an au pair job?

Wanting socks ironed is a little fussy in my book, but hardly exploitation...

imananny · 18/05/2008 17:56

what a nightmare for you

hope you manage to survive the next 7 weeks

wil you look for a new one for sept after summer hols?

Dynamicnanny · 18/05/2008 17:52

Oh no!! How old are your children can youuse after school clubs

Original poster
MrsRecycle · 18/05/2008 16:59

oops half term - week after next

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Original poster
MrsRecycle · 18/05/2008 16:58

6 weeks - we thought she was very happy - she'd told us she'd found the perfect family. Ironing - she didn't do any so couldn't have been unhappy with that. Although she did enjoy eating us out of house and home. Good job she was teetotal.

dh and I will try and manage things best we can - its not too bad as its half term next week so dh is off with LOs anyway. We really only need someone for 7 weeks so we should be able to manage.

OP posts:
nannynick · 18/05/2008 16:55

Oh no... so what are you going to do now? Au-Pairs are out, so what next... will you be having to find someone to help out, or will you and DH manage things as best you can?

NotABanana · 18/05/2008 16:55

Bloody hell! How long had she been with you?

I helped a friend leave her au pair job in Belgium as she wans't happy. One of her duties was to iron the children's socks.

I once did a midnight flit from a nanny job on my first night. The circumstances were justified though imo.