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Original poster

Nursery Pick Ups

53 replies

JollyHostess101 · 21/03/2025 14:02

Our little girl started nursery 2 weeks ago meant to be Thursday and Friday full days- she’s never been looked after by anyone but me and DH so we expected it might take a while to settle her in!

First proper week after 2 x 1hrs settling in sessions she lasted until lunchtime and we were asked to collect her on the first day as she hadn’t eaten and was distressed, second day the same!

Second week the same thing except the Friday she fell asleep so we were asked to collect her once she’d woken up as she was upset!

This week same again yesterday despite there being a photo uploaded to the app that she was in the garden playing happily!

Today DH got a call to collect at 10 as she wasn’t happy and hadn’t had anything to drink so he duly went off to collect her to find her happily playing in the garden…. How is she ever going to get used to it if we’re continuously collecting her with never having done a full day? Are nursery just calling us because they know we’ll pick her up? What if we couldn’t come and collect straight away?

Obviously we don’t want to traumatise her but but after next week when DH starts his new job it’s not going to be as easy for us to go and get her as well both be working and we’re paying for full days which she hasn’t ever done?

No childminders with availability so switching settings isn’t an option at the moment!

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Original poster
JollyHostess101 · 21/03/2025 14:13

Not necessarily but last Friday and today she’s been fine when we’ve gone to collect her! Today was only 90mins since I’d dropped her off before the call came in to go get her!

She’s our first so not sure how it works but what if we weren’t round the corner to be able to collect?! Luckily I work 5 mins away and DH is only 5 mins away in the car!!

OP posts:
Mrsttcno1 · 21/03/2025 14:11

My daughter had also recently started nursery and the only thing I’d say that I think did help us, which maybe you could try now, is increasing the time gradually so she actually has a chance to settle in. 1 hour to then full days is a big jump.

We had settling in sessions:

  • 30 mins with me there, 10 mins at the end where I left
  • 1 hour
  • 1.5 hours
  • 2 hours
  • 2.5 hours
  • 3 hours
  • 4 hours

And even after that we were told that for her first “proper” week they advise we keep the days shorter, so if her normal day would be 8 hours then for the first week keep them at 6ish hours, so we did that.

She’s settled in beautifully & is always so happy going in and coming out so it has absolutely worked for us. I do think when she’s never been looked after by anyone else going from 1 hour straight to full days was ambitious and setting her up to fail a bit, she needs more time to gradually build up. There’s also the fact that some children just don’t get on in a nursery setting & do need something a bit quieter.

Our nursery also asked us lots of questions about her beforehand, her routine, her favourite songs, her favourite toys, how she likes to sleep, favourite foods etc, so that they were prepared for any winging/spotting tiredness etc, did your nursery do the same? If not maybe you could give some of that info so any tips & tricks can be used to help keep her happy?

ScrewedByFunding · 21/03/2025 14:08

Do you think they are lying about her being unsettled then?

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