Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

Original poster

Au Pair Not speaking - help!

32 replies

redhen · 27/04/2008 10:37

Help! Have au pair just arrived yesterday from France. Trying very hard to involve and make her feel welcome but though she follows us around she is just not speaking at all. Her English is poor but my DH and I both speak good French and are making a real effort to speak lots and lots to her in French as well as basic English - but her replies are monosylabbic. She doesn't speak to children at all and hasn't really bothered to play with them. Just don't know what to do - only 24 hours in and I am really worried that its all a big mistake. We have had nannies and mothers helps before with various levels of english ability but all were happy to play with kids even if their language skills were poor... would love to hear from anybody who had maybe a similar experience and turned it around!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Set a reminder
Original poster
redhen · 29/04/2008 10:56

thanks for all of your messages and good advice, I took her to language school yesterday and despite her assurance that she has 7 years of english study they assessed her English skills as pretty much non-existent, it transpires that her aunt (who she now tells me lives in UK) wrote her application letter...all a bit tricky - I guess its a lesson for me also!

OP posts:
ingles2 · 27/04/2008 22:03

Give it a couple of days but if she is not making an effort then I'm afraid you'll have to think about moving her on.

HarrietTheSpy · 27/04/2008 16:56

She could be homesick...or in shock as to what being an au pair actually might entail...not to scare you. Give it a week and then have a chat.

ScienceTeacher · 27/04/2008 14:09

Is she being very Gallic? We have had three French aupairs, and they do tend to be very laid back and unperturbed.

I know she is here to learn English, but could perhaps the children ask her to teach them a song in French? If she does not respond to this, she may not be aupair material.

Our French aupairs have all been very good with the children, and happy to play with them and cook for them.

BradfordMum · 27/04/2008 14:03

I think you're doing really well by trying to kae her feel at home, HOWEVER, I think that she too should be trying to make an equal effort. After all, first impressions count and she's not made a very good one so far. When will she be on her own, so to speak, without you there to speak french to her?

Sally x

MeMySonAndI · 27/04/2008 10:45

It may be the shock, particularly if hse has not been on her "own" before. I think you are doing great by trying to make her feel at home, continue with that and hopefully she will feel more confident/settled soon.

sleepycat · 27/04/2008 10:42

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.