Would you have an objection to a lesbian aupair?

ST, I hear ya. I don't judge anybody else, but if I had a few fairly reasonable rules for 'under my own roof', I would be shocked to be challenged about those rules....

yes of course, if under your roof.
but you said you wouldn't want them to be sexually active at all, which is pretty different.
that is a moral judgment.

it would not bother me at all of their sexuallity , you hire an aupair on their experience of childcare and not their sexuality ffs stupid post

and harpsi, chill on the perfect typing front, i am around to make you look good, dont worry

yes, having strangers traipsing through you family home is unreasonable. obviously.

But if they slept with their boyfriend/girlfriend under someone else's roof, that would be OK?

If DP's brother came to stay I'd be perfectly happy for his GF to stay too, however if he stayed at my house and bought home some random girl from a club I'd be furious.
Probably more to do with not wanting my children seeing strangers wandering around their house and wanting to be the one who chooses who I feel suitable to be around them iyswim.

?

My sister is married, and if she came with her husband, then I would have no objection. If she wanted to sleep with someone else, I would have a problem with that.

I can control who my aupairs bring to my house, and they are not shacking up with their boyfriend under my roof. End of. I don't care if it sounds unreasonable - these are my terms.

argh, laptop battery dying... back later

argh their obviously.
I really need to concentrate more

Is ST's point that she doesn't want the au pairs sexual relations happening in an obvious manner, i.e. when you are paying somebody to watch your child, the attention should be on the child, not sticking their tongue down their boy/girl friends throat? Okay when the kids are in bed / not around etc, thats their own business.

Probably in the same way that when me & DH worked together, we wouldn't be snogging in the office.

so if your sister came to stay, would you tell her you would prefer her not to have sex while she was staying with you?

but au pairs are adults. what they choose to do in their private lives is there own concern and absolutely none of yours.

why the need to interfere?

If I were lucky enough to afford an au pair, I would not mind if he/she were straight/gay.

I would care that they cared for my child.

I have a lovely childminder, she loves my little girl, and my little girl says that the cm is "my best friend, mummy!" which I think is great.

It wouldn't bother me if my CM was gay.

living under your roof, her behaviour under your roof is of interest, i will grant you that.

but if she wants to shag entire football teams on her time off and in places other than your house, she is perfectly at liberty to do so. your opinion matters not one teeny little bit. none of your beeswax.

I think when you have someone living under your roof, certain aspects of their personal life are of interest.

I personally wouldnt want my Au Pair bringing back numerous partners but one single partner in a loving caring relationship wouldn't bother me.
My DC's know that boyfriends/girlfriends can come and go and I'm happy for them to know that, I'd be bothered about obvious promiscuity though.

(sorry for stray apostrophe there)

oh no i absolutely insist that anyone coming into daily contact with me at all, be celibate. or at the v least that they dont enjoy any sex they do have.
its despicable really.... sex, i mean, purlease. who does that anyway? surely not mothers

why do I think what?
that it is a little odd to have an interest in the sex life of an employee
why is it any of your business?

Why do you think that HC?

ha, shit, me too! that's how I read it.
I think I must have sex on the brain
I am slightly at scienceteacher's suggstion that her aupair's couldn't be sexually active and rather hope she is joking.
perhaps you were thinking of a governess, ST?

i do keep reading the title as 'would you have any objection to a lesbian affair' and thinking - 'why? you offering?'

I don't think the title should be deleted, I think it's to our credit as a community that so many posters have responded with intelligence and common sense. It's a debate worth reading.

Message withdrawn

My best babysitter ever was my friends younger brother.
I got some strange looks and remarks when people found out I had a male looking after my child(ren) and a million comments about how he must be a 'poof'.
He was great with my DC's and I knew and trusted him, had known him for years in fact.
I'm not sure what got the stronger reaction, when he finally came out or the fact that he was male, somehow people seemed to think it was more acceptable for a male to babysit if he was gay.